Quiz: Where Should You Cry Right Now?

There are soooo many places that are perfect for crying. The number one thing I miss about having a larger closet was my ability to cry inside of it, which is perhaps a little too on-the-nose for a Sad Gay, but I love to live in cliches, baby!!!! I also famously love to turn on a very sad movie when I’m crying, because I like to watch other people cry while I’m crying. Can anyone relate? I’m also one of those people who cannot STOP crying once I start! It’s honestly a problem, because sometimes I’m not even feeling the feeling anymore but just keep on crying on anyway!

What better way to spend your Sunday than taking a sad quiz about crying? Crying is cheaper than brunch!


What was the last thing you cried about?(Required)
Choose a crying stock image:(Required)
How often do you cry?(Required)
What do you like to watch while crying?(Required)
Choose an emoji:(Required)
Pick a still of a queer character crying:(Required)
Pick your favorite scientific fact about tears/crying:(Required)
Which of the following is most likely to make you cry?(Required)
Choose a must-have crying accessory:(Required)
Choose a piece of furniture to cry on:(Required)
Choose an internet-y way to convey that you’re crying:(Required)
Choose a sad clown:(Required)

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Kayla Kumari Upadhyaya

Kayla Kumari Upadhyaya is the managing editor of Autostraddle and a lesbian writer of essays, short stories, and pop culture criticism living in Orlando. She is the assistant managing editor of TriQuarterly, and her short stories appear or are forthcoming in McSweeney's Quarterly Concern, Joyland, Catapult, The Offing, and more. Some of her pop culture writing can be found at The A.V. Club, Vulture, The Cut, and others. You can follow her on Twitter or Instagram and learn more about her work on her website.

Kayla has written 922 articles for us.

12 Comments

  1. “You should cry curled up in a ball on someone else’s couch.” (I did this last week. I’m a hospice volunteer and usually cry after finishing calls to clients. I was catsitting, and the poor kitty was so alarmed.)

  2. Omg I should cry in the great outdoors and I am in a park RIGHT NOW!! Thanks Kayla! Here we goo! (Also I love the sentence about onions deterring “predators”, makes it sound like they’re a prey animal 😭)

  3. I got “cry outside” which is a great idea and appropriate (or maybe ironic) because I just got back from a camping trip.

    Though for how to tell the I ternet I’m crying my favorite is Tumblr tags on an appropriately angst reblog: “I’m not crying; you’re crying”

  4. I got “cry outside” when really my most common response is “on some form of public transportation”. Its all the transition, and change, and maybe leaving people!

    second choice- bathroom at work
    third choice- subtly in a meeting hoping that the glasses/mask combo disguises silent tears rolling down my cheeks

  5. lmao should cry in a parked car Thee last time I cried was in a car!! Granted it was moving but still.

    However, I must say. The last time I cried was for pet related reasons, which is I feel like a category that is missing here. Also, rather than watching something while I cry I prefer to listen to a special playlist called ‘time to cry’ that is just things like landslide by fleetwood mac. Anyway.

  6. Public transportation- it’s been a minute since i’ve done that! forgotten my roots, i used to cry on the L all the time.

    The last place i cried was in the rare book room at my library cause there was just too much to do, real dark academia win

  7. Well, I’m the only one who got “cry on the kitchen floor”?! A weirdo amongst weirdos,LOL! But, hey its close to the fridge. Also second the suggestions that “pet-related” & “gender issues” be options;there’s always another quiz,right kids?

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