Deciding to leave on a high note I GUESS, Doc says his goodbyes and leaves right from the reception. He’s already said his goodbyes to Wynonna, so he just gets into his car and heads back to his RV while Wynonna watches with sadness in her eyes.

“You’re not even going to stay to help clean up? Cool cool.”

As Damon packs up his catering gear, Jeremy comes over to apologize and they awkwardly flirt and agree to go on a date. It’s very cute and very nice to be reassured that sweet Jeremy won’t be pining after Robin forever. That he’s ready to move on. Jeremy gets a call and a sexy, sexy voice promotes him to Deputy Director of the Ghost River Triangle division of Black Badge and he says he’ll be there…after his date with Damon.

Wynonna marches across the Homestead to Doc and tells him to stop bluffing and unpack his car, but he has his eyes on the horizon and he’s on his way. She all but begs him to stay, and Doc admits he lied to her once. He told her that vengeance is what kept him sane in his well-shaped prison, but the truth is it was only partly the promise of revenge that fueled him. It was also the thought of love, and the hope of finding it one day that got him through.

He says that life isn’t as short as the idioms want you to believe. Life is long, and it can be lonely. All you can do is find people to get through it with. “A group of souls who will tolerate you and elevate you.” And if you’re lucky, one special one who will love you more than the rest. And that love? That bond? That’s what it’s all for.

Wynonna tearfully says she can’t leave Waverly, so Doc calls her the best Earp he’s ever known and kisses her cheek in farewell. She apologizes for hurting him, but he says they only ever hurt themselves. “I wouldn’t have changed a note,” he smiles sadly at her before he drives away, leaving her standing alone in her feelings.

“To love someone so much, to have no control. You said, ‘I want to see the world’ and I said, “Go” But I think I’m lost without you.”

Wynonna goes back to the h=Homestead to tell everyone what happened and they’re a little confused as to why she did the whole metaphorical running through the airport to stop him and then did not go with him. They know the WynDoc relationship is complicated, but c’mon, no one is asking her to marry him, just to give it a true shot. Wynonna is surprised they’re taking this stance. What about Purgatory, what about them, what about Peacemaker? She can’t leave the Ghost River Triangle. To which a smol angry bride storms out of the house telling her that she absolutely fucking can.

That’s that good sister shit. From a shotgun greeting to an earlobe out the door, the Earp sisters have always been the greatest love story of this show.

Waverly drags Wynonna to the barn by her ear and starts packing her things. If Wynonna wants to leave town with Doc, she is leaving town with Doc, even if Waverly has to bamf out her goth wings to fly her to him herself. Wynonna has given up too much for Waverly, for everyone, for Waverly to let her give up this, too. She tells Wynonna that even though she likes to walk the loner walk, she’s not alone. And she deserves this.

When Wynonna again expresses concern about Waverly’s safety, Waverly all but scoffs at her. Nicole is the Angel’s Shield and the sheriff, Jeremy is the head of BBD, Waverly can melt faces with her bare hands and also stopped the Silk Witch without Wynonna’s help. They’ve got this! She says Doc has been trying to prove himself to Wynonna for years (actually says the cowboy became a cowman which helped me laugh through all my tears), and that they’ll be okay without her for a little while so she can have her own adventure.

This scene gets me every time. I’m even tearing up just uploading these images. I know it’s not goodbye forever but goodbye for nows hurt, too.

Waverly says there was a time where she was terrified Wynonna would never come back. But now she knows she always will. They cry, and I cry, and Waverly reminds them that they have cell phones. It’s not like they’re going to disappear from each other’s lives just because they’re not living on the same plot of land anymore. They will still be each other’s home even if they’re not physically together.

“It helps to think we might be wishing on the same bright star.”

So Wynonna wraps her baby girl tight in her arms and tries not to stain her wedding dress with tears. They’ve grown so much in the past few years, separately and together, and now they know their relationship can survive anything, even a little time apart.

Will *I* survive distance from the Earp sisters, though? Only time will tell.

And so it’s settled. Wynonna runs outside and everyone helps her to get ready to leave. She puts on the outfit she had on in the pilot, right down to the seasonally inappropriate leather jacket, and when her truck dies she instantly remembers another mode of transportation she has at her disposal.

Siri, show me “family”

So Wynonna Earp mounts her bike and takes off after the love of her life, shooting out his tires just to show the fastest gunslinger in the West that she’s a damn good shot, too. She tells him that he was right and that she loves him and they kiss in the middle of the road. It’s very romantic.

And at first part of me had a twinge of sadness that she ended up with anyone at all, but then John Henry Holliday — THE Doc Holliday — got on the back of Wynonna’s bike without hesitation or even so much as a joke about it and I realized this is exactly what Wynonna deserves. She doesn’t need a man, but she will be happier for the support and love of this man in particular. This man who knows her, flaws and all, and loves her both in spite of and because of them. Someone to reassure her that even if she’s a little broken, it doesn’t mean she’s not worthy of loving someone and being loved in return.

“I don’t need you but I choose you” is the best kind of love, in my opinion.

Wynonna says, “It’s been a long time since I’ve traveled light,” and they take off down the road that Wynonna once feared was a one-way street. When she came back into town on her 27th birthday, she had the weight of a legacy on her shoulders, and she felt like she was stepping into a deep lake with it. But over the years she managed to stay afloat with the help of her family and friends, and little by little they chipped away at that weight, together. They killed the demons, they broke the curse, they saved the day. And with everyone sharing her burden, it didn’t feel so unmanageable anymore. It’s taken her a while to realize she could stop treading water so hard, but now with the wind in her hair and Purgatory at her back, she realizes she can finally stop kicking and not be dragged under. She can just float.

As Wynonna and Doc plan their road trip, Wynonna suggests perhaps they take a detour through Miracles, Montana, where a certain little girl might be keen to see them.

I don’t know who Alice Michelle will think they are to her, but I do know she’ll be able to feel their love for her before they even hop off that bike.

Back in Purgatory, Waverly and Nicole look out over the Homestead. Their home, together as wives. Quiet for the first time in a long time.

“And I don’t know how it gets better than this, you take my hand and drag me head first, fearless.”

Waverly asks if Nicole wishes they could go on a whirlwind honeymoon but Nicole doesn’t need to stray far from this porch to feel like she’s on an adventure as long as Waverly’s by her side. All she’s ever wanted was this.

This chapter we got to spend with Waverly and Nicole might be over, but their story has just begun.

Waverly Earp smiling at her from her front porch – from their front porch.

“You really, really know me, the future and the old me. All of the mazes and the madness in my mind. You really, really love me, you know me and you love me, and it’s the kind of thing I always hoped I’d find.”

Waverly Earp says the last spoken words of the show, which also happens to be the point of it. They spent four seasons protecting it, fighting for it, building it. And now they get to enjoy it.

Home.

“Home is wherever I’m with you.”

The camera swings to the familiar sight of the mailbox with EARP written on it, but as it pans up the signpost, more names have been added. One sign adds, “and Haught,” another says “sometimes Holliday” and then there’s one more. And I think it’s for us. It says, “Everyone welcome.”

If you need me I’ll be lying on the floor about this for the next six months.

Wynonna Earp started in April 2016, less than a month after the Bury Your Gays trope came to a head with the death of Lexa kom Trikru on The 100. So many queer characters had died by the time that episode aired, and Lexa wasn’t even the last. But in the Season One finale of Wynonna Earp that June, Nicole Haught, resident lesbian, was shot but ultimately survived because she was wearing a bulletproof vest. It felt like a “fuck you” to the Bury Your Gays trope, which it was, but it also felt like a direct response to Lexa’s death, which it technically wasn’t. The episode was written and filmed before episode 307 of The 100 ever aired, which honestly makes it more special, in my opinion. Because Wynonna Earp was always going to do right by us, the timing of it was just a lucky coincidence.

Eventually when the character Jeremy was added to the mix, he, Waverly, and Nicole were dubbed the “Unkillable Gay Squad,” which was a nickname supported by the show’s creators, and while some shows wouldn’t have dared made such a promise because it seems to lower the stakes, these writers knew that the stakes could be plenty high without any queer characters’ lives on the line. They had queer people in the writers’ room, they had queer people on screen, they were unapologetically gay at every turn and didn’t care what any Bunny Loblaws had to say about it. They were going to make it as gay as they could; they had the opportunity that not a lot of people get, and even less people take, and they were going to make the best of it.

And then, this show had the GALL to go even further than that and give us the HAPPILY EVER AFTER we so rarely get. And not even just for the queer people, for everyone. The last two episodes pair together like whiskey and donuts, a hard-fought battle and the hard-earned happy ending.

And it makes sense. This show was about love, top to bottom. Sister love, found family love, queer love, complicated love, lost love, new love, rekindled love, friendship love. Loving yourself and each other even when it’s hard, fighting for the things and the people you love. The love an audience can have for a show, and the love a show can have for its audience. It hurts so much to say goodbye, but that pain is just proof that it was so special.

I’ve always been bad at goodbyes. I’m not one for crying in front of other people very often, and in fact I’m not quick to crying in general. And listen, I know crying isn’t the be all end all of expressing emotion, but it’s how I know I’ve bubbled over. When I was a junior in college, I remember one time I was particularly emotional, partially because of exhaustion, partially because of alcohol, and partially because it was becoming clear that my relationship with my best friend was over for reasons I couldn’t control or honestly comprehend, and while I was telling a friend about this, I straight up burst into tears. And I’ll never forget the look on my friend’s face because she was surprised and also looked mildly terrified. She kind of put her hands up like she wanted to make it stop and she said, “What is happening? You’re Valerie! You don’t cry!”

But goodbyes are always the exception. I’ve cried at wakes and funerals, of course. But also I’ve cried on the last night of every musical or play I’ve ever been in. I cried on the last night of every dance recital, on the bus from Boston to New York at the start of every school year in college and from New York to Boston at the start of every summer. I cried at the end of every service trip in high school, first night back from every A-Camp, and after every graduation. And though Wynonna Earp has made me cry a little here and there in the context of the show, I’ve never cried as hard about it as I have a) saying goodbye to friends I only see every few months on our last night together as a group at the end of Earp-specific cons, and b) at the end of this series finale. This show was so special to me for so many reasons; for how much I enjoyed the show itself, for the experiences I’ve had because of it, for the people who have come into my life through it.

And I’m not saying the show was 100% perfect 100% of the time, but it was extremely important to me and it changed my life for the better. I know I’m incredibly biased because I have had the pleasure of meeting so many people involved in making this show and they have all been so wonderful, but I’m not even exaggerating; the entire shape of my world is different than it was five years ago, and some pretty big parts of it can be traced back to this show.

I wrote for a different website when this show started, and when that website unceremoniously dumped all its freelancers, the first thing Heather said to me was that my Wynonna Earp recaps could have a new home at Autostraddle. It was only one season in, and it was already clear how important this show was to me. And so I started writing here, which has been one of the most professionally and emotionally fulfilling experiences of my life.

Wynonna Earp also brought me the friends that introduced me to D&D, and Autostraddle brought me my adventuring party, and I truly would not have survived 2020 without them. This show has brought the people I love most in this world, including people I don’t think I ever would have met if not for our shared love for this show. And now they’re the people I can message on bad days, after a frustrating work meeting or from a hospital waiting room. They’re the first people I want to share my good news with. They’re the people I stay up til 3am with talking about nothing and everything, they’re the people I’d go anywhere with just to spend time with them, even if we never get farther than 60 ft from the hotel, because we could make a cursed triangle of murdertrees fun. We have the same sense of humor and the same understanding that sometimes a TV show isn’t “just” a TV show. Sometimes it’s your comfort, your hope, your anchor. Sometimes it’s home.

When Waverly Earp looked at her sister and said, “We have cell phones, ding dong,” it felt like she was reaching through the screen and comforting me directly. Stop crying, silly, just because the show is ending doesn’t mean it’s over. It doesn’t mean all the feelings you had never happened, it doesn’t mean the memories you made will be forgotten, it doesn’t mean the friendships you made are going to vanish into thin air. The powers that be can stop ordering new episodes of Wynonna Earp, but they can never take Wynonna Earp away from us. We don’t need new Wynonna Earp episodes to make more Earp memories. (Though frankly more episodes would be nice.)

Part of me hopes this is like when you’re at a party and you start to leave but then someone calls you over and an hour later you run into someone you already said goodbye to. Or when you say your teary goodbyes to a room full of people only to return 30 minutes later because you forgot your bag. I don’t care how awkward it would be that I wrote a farewell letter to my favorite show and then it got renewed. I’ll take that on, it will be worth it. Because last time I said goodbye to my friends, I didn’t know it would be a year and a half before I hugged them again and it breaks my heart. I’d rather say goodbye a thousand times then have wasted my last opportunity.

So first I will say thank you. Thank you to the writers and showrunner, Emily Andras, who gave us this gift. Thank you to Melanie Scrofano, Dominique Provost-Chalkley, Kat Barrell, Tim Rozon, Varun Saranga, and everyone in the cast who gave this show their all, whether their parts were big or small. And I will say goodbye to you, Wynonna Earp. Goodbye to all the inside jokes and big gay moments and heartbreaks and hiatuses and fights and renewals and celebrations. Goodbye to all the leather jackets and crop tops and Stetsons. Goodbye to the tears and laughter. Maybe we’ll say hello again, but maybe we won’t. Maybe that’s okay, because this time together was so special.

As much as I hate goodbyes, this episode was a perfect one. And we’ll always have Purgatory.

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