Trump’s Cabinet Picks Ranked by the Raw Terror I Feel in My Soul When I Look Into Their Eyes

As has been noted by many others in the media, the rollout of Trump’s cabinet picks has felt like the lineup for a really maudlin, bizarre parade sponsored by Fox News. Conspiracy theorists! White nationalists! Sexual predators! Dog-killers! Sean from The Real World: Boston!

In 2016, when I researched and ranked Trump’s cabinet nominees by terror I felt in my heart, I was evaluating a list of relatively established conservative Republicans. There were some wild cards, for sure, but also plenty of politicians widely respected by right-wing leaders, like Jeff Sessions, Rick Perry, Nikki Haley, John F. Kelly and James Mattis. Those guys were terrifying in their own way, and many didn’t last long in Trump’s administration, often due to clashes with the man himself. Now the party has been thoroughly MAGA-fied and we’re looking at a bunch of Trump loyalists with thin qualifications besides absolute devotion to our future President.

Without any further ado, let’s wade into the swamp and stare into the gaping maw of our potentially extremely dark future!


Lori Chavez-DeRemer, Secretary of Labor

WASHINGTON - JUNE 27: Rep. Lori Chavez-DeRemer, R-Ore., participates in the House Transportation Committee hearing on "Oversight of the Department of Transportation's Policies and Programs and Fiscal Year 2025 Budget Request" in the Rayburn House Office Building on Thursday, June 27, 2024. (Bill Clark/CQ-Roll Call, Inc via Getty Images)

(Bill Clark/CQ-Roll Call, Inc via Getty Images)

What’s her deal? Moderate Republican from Oregon who recently lost her congressional re-election bid. Her candidacy for SOL was backed by unions including International Brotherhood of Teamsters. ALF-CIO President praised her “pro-labor record” but warned of her limited powers to curb Trump’s “dramatically anti-worker agenda.” Cautious optimism and “it could have been worse” seems to be the vibe overall.

Formerly a anesthesiology and wellness business owner, she ran for congress promising to reduce crime, provide even more funding to the police and relax energy regulations.

Is there anything good to say about this woman? The New York Post describes her as backing “a laundry list of boiler-plate liberal policies at odds with longstanding Republican orthodoxies” including “amnesty for illegal immigrants” in a piece that radiated with outrage under a headline declaring her a “toxic anti-conservative RINO who is too close to unions.” In congress, co-sponsored legislation including federal cannabis law reforms, an act to protect unions’ right to organize and another to expand the powers of public sector unions.

Government experience: Happy Valley City Council (2005-2011), Mayor of Happy Valley (2011-2019), U.S. House of Representatives from Oregon (2023-2024)


Scott Turner, Director of Housing and Urban Development

WASHINGTON, DC - SEPTEMBER 10: White House Opportunity and Revitalization Council Executive Director Scott Turner (R) speaks at the invitation of U.S. President Donald Trump during the National Historically Black Colleges and Universities Week Conference at the Renaissance Hotel September 10, 2019 in Washington, DC. Earlier in the day Trump fired his National Security Advisor John Bolton. (Photo by Chip Somodevilla/Getty Images)

(Photo by Chip Somodevilla/Getty Images)

Job Description: Addressing the nation’s housing needs, fair housing laws and low-income public housing.

What’s his deal? We don’t know a ton about this guy. Turner was a football player who spent nine seasons in the NFL, spending off-seasons working as an intern for various Republican congressmen, and joined the Texas House in 2013 with the support of the tea party. More recently he’s worked as a “motivational speaker” and “chief inspiration officer” and headed up a “White House Opportunity and Revitalization Council” during Trump’s first term to coordinate investment in economically depressed areas. (While providing tax cuts to wealthy investors.) Loves the lord.

Like so many others in the cabinet, he’s a chair at the America First Policy Institute. The AFPI housing agenda aims to tackle the housing crisis from “its roots” via “empowering law enforcement to act in defense of their communities and public spaces,” rather than Biden’s approach which was about finding housing for people without housing. Currently is “Chief Visionary Officer” for JPI, North Texas’ biggest apartment builder, which sold to a Japanese housing firm in late 2023.

Turner is Trump’s sole Black nominee, and is being nominated for the same role secured by Trump’s sole Black nominee in 2016, Ben Carson.

Is there anything good to say about this man? Probably? He’s sort of an enigma, everything I read about him is intensely value neutral.

Government experience: White House Opportunity and Revitalization Council (2019 -2021), Texas House of Representatives (2013-2017)


Doug Collins, Secretary of the Department of Veterans Affairs

WASHINGTON, DC - DECEMBER 12: Ranking member Rep. Doug Collins (R-GA) speaks during a House Judiciary Committee markup hearing on the Articles of Impeachment against President Donald Trump at the Longworth House Office Building on Thursday December 12, 2019 in Washington, DC. The articles of impeachment charge Trump with abuse of power and obstruction of Congress. House Democrats claim that Trump posed a 'clear and present danger' to national security and the 2020 election in his dealings with Ukraine over the past year. (Photo by Andrew Harrer - Pool/Getty Images)

Photo by Andrew Harrer – Pool/Getty Images

Job Description: Overseeing compensation and pensions to 6.7 million veterans and family members and health care to 9 million veterans.

What’s his deal? This former member of Trump’s impeachment defense team plans to “drain the swamp and make America WIN again.” His own military experience includes two years as a navy chaplain in the late ’80s and a post-9/11 enrollment in the United States Air Force Reserve Command. He spent five months deployed to Iraq in 2008.

Staunch anti-abortion advocate, opposes LGBTQ+ rights, opposes the Affordable Care Act, promotes anti-trans propaganda and 2020 election denialism, supported the “Muslim ban,” rejects climate change. Opposed the 2013 Violence Against Women Act.

Is there anything good to say about this man? From 1994-2005, co-ran a scrapbooking store with his wife Lisa.

Government Experience: Member of the U.S House of Representatives from Georgia (2013-2021), Member of the Georgia State House of Representatives (2007-2013)


Kelly Loeffler, Small Business Association Director

CUMMING, GA - DECEMBER 20: Georgia Senator Kelly Loeffler talks to supporters during a campaign event on Sunday, December 20, 2020, at the Reid Barn in Cumming, GA. Loeffler is running against Democratic candidate Raphael Warnock in the runoff election on January 5, 2021. (Photo by Austin McAfee/Icon Sportswire via Getty Images)

(Photo by Austin McAfee/Icon Sportswire via Getty Images)

Job Description: Guaranteeing loans, assisting with government contracts and supporting small business interests.

What’s her deal? Donated $4.9 million to Trump’s campaign. Formerly a “moderate, business-oriented Republican,” Loeffler’s political passions shifted dramatically towards Trump after his first election. Ran her senate campaign “using not so much a racist dog whistle as a racist foghorn,” focusing massive ire on the Black Lives Matter movement and the WNBA team she co-owned, The Atlanta Dream, speaking out publicly in June 2020 against their choice to wear BLM and “Say Her Name” shirts instead of her preferred attire: the American flag. Two-time WNBA champ Renee Montgomery asked to meet with Loeffler to discuss their proposals, and was rejected. The team’s players, union, fans and the league itself pressured Loeffler to sell the club — and then Montgomery herself joined the ownership club that ended up buying the team from Loeffler.

Donated portions of her senate salary to anti-LGBTQ adoption agencies and anti-abortion orgs. Introduced Senate legislation to bar trans women from playing sports.

Along with her husband, Intercontinental Exchange CEO/Founder and current New York Stock Exchange chairman Jeffrey Sprecher, was under investigation for suspicious stock sales during the COVID-19 pandemic. They are rich as hell. Former CEO of a cryptocurrency trading platform.

She scares me, but knowing she’s already been defeated by the Atlanta Dream gives me a small sliver of hope.

Government Experience: Briefly served in the Senate after an appointment by Georgia Governor Brian Kemp, with a term that lasted from early 2020 until her January 2021 defeat in a special election.


Scott Bessent, Secretary of the Treasury

Scott Bessent speaks at the National Conservative Conference in Washington D.C., Wednesday, July 10, 2024. (Photo by Dominic Gwinn / Middle East Images / Middle East Images via AFP) (Photo by DOMINIC GWINN/Middle East Images/AFP via Getty Images)

Photo by DOMINIC GWINN/Middle East Images/AFP via Getty Images

Job Description: Advises the president on economic and fiscal topics including spending, taxes and tarriffs.

What’s his deal? A billionaire and a married gay man with two kids who formerly contributed to candidates including Al Gore, Barack Obama, Hohn Kerry and Hillary Clinton; Bessent cut his financial teeth working as a partner for the firm of legendary subject-of-QAnon-conspiracy-theories George Soros. For the past 15 years, Bessent’s been throwing his millions at Republicans, including Trump since 2016. Says Trump’s plan to impose blanket 20% tariffs on all imports was a “maximalist position” that would “probably be watered down.”

If confirmed, he’d be the first out LGBTQ+ cabinet member of a Republican administration.

Is there anything good to say about this man? According to The Times, “In some policy areas, Mr. Bessent has demonstrated an inclination to temper Mr. Trump’s economic impulses.” Elon Musk wanted Trump to pick someone else. Endowed three scholarships at his alma mater, Yale, including one for first-generation college students. Formerly served on the board of God’s Love We Deliver, an organization that delivered meals to homebound AIDS patients. His house in Charleston is painted entirely pink.

Government Experience: None


Elise Stefanik, UN Ambassador

WASHINGTON, DC - JUNE 21: Rep. Elise Stefanik (R-NY) arrives to speak at the Faith and Freedom Road to Majority conference at the Washington Hilton on June 21, 2024 in Washington, DC. The conservative Christian group is hosting a series of congressional members and political candidates to speak on the upcoming 2024 elections. Republican presidential candidate, former U.S. President Donald Trump will deliver the keynote address later this weekend. (Photo by Anna Moneymaker/Getty Images)

Photo by Anna Moneymaker/Getty Images

Job Description: Represents the U.S. on the UN Security council

What’s her deal? Stefanik blamed Nancy Pelosi for the January 6th attacks and is a huge fan of Margaret Thatcher, the Keystone pipeline, and Donald Trump. She’s worked in government as a staffer and elected official since the George W. Bush administration.

She is staunchly pro-Israel and has been critical of the UN for not being supportive enough of Netanyahu’s genocide against Palestinians. She led questioning of university presidents during the U.S. congressional hearings in response to pro-Palestine protests on campuses. She was granted the “Dr. Miriam and Sheldon Adelson Defender of Israel Award” by the Zionist Organization of America and has suggested the U.S. reevaluate its funding of the UN after the Palestinian Authority attempted to hold Israel accountable for its human rights abuses in Gaza. She has positioned herself as a faithful and stalwart ally in the fight against antisemitism, despite historically promoting antisemitic ideas. Stefanik, like so many Conservative Christian politicians is, in essence, only fighting anti-Zionism, not actual antisemitism. Her position on Israel has earned her a lot of money, and along with her loyalty to Trump, it’s now earned her a spot in his administration.

All that said — our current ambassador to the UN, although being infinitely more qualified than Stefanik, is also a staunch and apparently unconditional ally to Israel.

Is There Anything Good To Say About This Woman: Criticized Trump’s decision to withdraw from the Paris climate agreement. Voted in favor of the Respect for Marriage Act.

Government Experience: Member of the U.S House of Representatives from New York (2015—)


Lee Zeldin, Environmental Protection Agency Director

WASHINGTON, DC, DISTRICT OF COLUMBIA, UNITED STATES - 2023/03/04: Former Congressman Lee Zeldin speaks on the 3rd day of the CPAC (Conservative Political Action Conference) Washington, DC conference at Gaylord National Harbor Resort & Convention. (Photo by Lev Radin/Pacific Press/LightRocket via Getty Images)

Photo by Lev Radin/Pacific Press/LightRocket via Getty Images

What’s his deal? An “ass kissing sycophant” who voted against certifying the 2020 election results, Zeldin plans to “restore US energy dominance, revitalize our auto industry to bring back American jobs, and make the US the global leader of AI” while also somehow ensuring we have the cleanest air and water of all time. Environmental groups are horrified and anticipate a “drill baby drill” agenda and a focus on deregulation. He backed Trump’s exit from the Paris climate agreement.

Is there anything good to say about this man? Has a history of siding with Democrats on toxic chemical issues.”

Government Experience: U.S House of Representatives from New York (2015-2023), New York State Senate (2011-2014)


John Ratcliffe, CIA Director

WASHINGTON, DC - DECEMBER 12: Director of National Intelligence John Ratcliffe follows behind U.S. President Donald Trump, as they depart on the South Lawn of the White House, on December 12, 2020 in Washington, DC. Trump is traveling to the Army versus Navy Football Game at the United States Military Academy in West Point, NY. (Photo by Al Drago/Getty Images)

Photo by Al Drago/Getty Images

Job Description: Manages the agency’s intelligence collection, analysis, covert action, counterintelligence, and liaison relationships with foreign services.

What’s his deal? During Trump’s first term, Trump’s attempt to have Ratcliffe replace Dan Coats as National Intelligence Director in 2019 was thwarted by Republican senators who were concerned about Ratcliffe’s “embellishments” of his experience with terrorism and immigration cases and his potential to politicize intelligence. But in 2020, Trump got him in, and his brief tenure was predictably messy, as he chaotically declassified information in clear service of political aims and often went “off-script” and promoted falsehoods. He was the guy who declassified the Russian intelligence disinformation right before the 2020 election.

Is there anything good to say about this man: Career intelligence officials seem to feel it “could have been a lot worse” based on other potential nominees for the role.

Government Experience: Member of the U.S House of Representatives from Texas (2015-2020), Mayor of Heath, Texas (2004-2012), U.S Attorney for Eastern District of Texas (2007-2008),


Susie Wiles, White House Chief of Staff

West Palm Beach, FL - November 6 : Chris LaCivita and Susie Wiles listen as Republican presidential nominee former President Donald Trump speaks after being declared the winner during an election night watch party at the Palm Beach County Convention Center in West Palm Beach, Florida in the early hours of Wednesday, Nov. 06, 2024. (Photo by Jabin Botsford/The Washington Post via Getty Images)

(Photo by Jabin Botsford/The Washington Post via Getty Images)

What’s her deal? Famously Floridian Wiles has an extensive history with Trump specifically and has been serving in advisory roles to various Republicans in office or campaigning since the 1980s, including Ronald Reagan, Ron DeSantis, and John Delaney. After many years as a lobbyist she joined Trump’s team in 2016 and hasn’t looked back, described in an in-depth Politico piece earlier this year as “in essence [Trump’s] chief of staff for the last more than three years,” credited with making him electable in 2024. Politico described friends and colleagues bewildered by someone as smart and sane as Wiles aligning herself so squarely with Trump but also feel comforted that she’d be in the room with Trump if he does win. She listed “creating order from chaos” as one of her greatest assets on LinkedIn and she is known for being shrewd and strategic in how she handles the press and her candidates’ narratives.

Is there anything good to say about this woman? “If this guy wins, and I certainly hope he doesn’t, but if he were to win again, I would hope to hell that she will play a major role.” – Susie’s friend Paul

Government experience: Has worked for various politicians in some capacity or another for a very long time


Sean Duffy, Secretary of Transportation

WASHINGTON, DC-SEPTEMBER 9: Congressman Sean Duffy of Wisconsin along the Tidal Basin on September 9, 2011 in Washington DC(Photo by Benjamin C Tankersley/For The Washington Post via Getty Images)

(Photo by Benjamin C Tankersley/For The Washington Post via Getty Images)

Job Description: Overseeing infrastructure such as roads, bridges and airports as well as drone regulations, automobile safety, emissions standards and fuel-economy rules. This includes remaining funds from Biden’s $1 trillion 2021 infrastructure law.

What’s his deal? This is the log roller guy from The Real World: Boston who married Rachel from The Real World: San Francisco! Does anybody remember him, the guy who did log rolling and who accused his Black castmate Kameelah of “reverse racism” and compared her to Hitler? Well, I curse the day I ever saw this man put his feet on a log. Apparently Rachel and Sean are both Fox News hosts now.

Duffy supported Trump’s Muslim ban, says Islamic terrorism is widespread whereas the white terrorists who shot up a mosque in Quebec was a “one-off,” and is fine with wolves going extinct. He blamed Pete Buttigieg for holiday airline travel chaos in 2022. Tried to overturn Obamacare. Has said vile and racist things about Native Americans and Black people and listen I could keep going with this guy.

Unclear what his plans will be for transportation (logs?), but he did build a large bridge in Minnesota one time.

Is there anything good to say about this man? Was in Norman (The Real World: New York)’s short film about a gay wedding. Is very good at climbing up poles (holds two speed-climbing titles).

Government experience: Member of the U.S. House of Representatives from Wisconsin (2011-2019), District Attorney of Ashland County, Wisconsin (2002-2010)


Kash Patel, FBI Director

CHARLOTTE, USA - OCTOBER 10: Kash Patel at the Team Trump Bus Tour in Charlotte, United States on October 10, 2024. (Photo by Peter Zay/Anadolu via Getty Images)

CHARLOTTE, USA – OCTOBER 10: Kash Patel at the Team Trump Bus Tour in Charlotte, United States on October 10, 2024. (Photo by Peter Zay/Anadolu via Getty Images)

What’s his deal? Trump loyalist who believes the election was stolen and reportedly blocked Department of Defense officials from helping the Biden Administration in its transition. Author of a children’s picture book The Plot Against the King, telling a revisionist story of the FBI inquiry into Russian interference in the U.S Election and “partial memoir” about the “deep state,” Government Gangsters: The Deep Stae, the Truth, and the Battle For Our Democraxcy. Following Trump’s first term, kept a “regular schedule of Trump-happy podcast interviews to hawk his books, solicit donations to his causes, and keep his brand fresh,” including alt-right conspiracy theorists, QAnon supporters and white nationalists. On Steve Bannon’s podcast, promised to go after members of the media and the government who criticized Trump.

Government experience: Senior Council on Counterterrorism for House Select Committee on Intelligence, Senior Committee Aid to House Intelligence Committee Chair Devin Nunes, Cheif of Staff to Sec of Defense, was involved in Trump administration in myriad ways I cannot begin to enumerate.


Marco Rubio, Secretary of State

WASHINGTON, DC - SEPTEMBER 08: Sen. Marco Rubio (R-FL) speaks to reporters in the Senate Subway during a vote in the U.S. Capitol on September 08, 2022 in Washington, DC. Senators are working toward an agreement on a short-term spending bill to fund the government and avoid a potential shutdown at the end of the month, as well as take up the Marriage Equality Bill. (Photo by Anna Moneymaker/Getty Images)

(Photo by Anna Moneymaker/Getty Images)

Job Description:  Carrying out the President’s foreign policies through the State Department and the Foreign Service of the United States.

What’s his deal? Rubio is super, super conservative, doesn’t believe in climate change, opposes the Affordable Care Act, loves guns, opposes net neutrality and is an outspoken opponent of abortion even in the case of rape or incest. When it comes to foreign policy, which is the field he’ll be overseeing for Trump, he’s described as “hawkish” and favors collecting metadata for national security. Fair Observer has noted that “he is the most certain to provide continuity with all that is wrong with United States foreign policy, from Cuba to the Middle East to China.” That same piece says that Marco, who is Cuban, seems on board with a plan to “economically strangle and starve” the people of Cuba into submission.

When it comes to the genocide in Gaza, Rubio is a staunch supporter of Israel, believing they can do no wrong. When asked if it was possible to stop Hamas without causing major casualties amongst innocents in Gaza, Rubio said no, adding “I don’t think there’s any way Israel can be expected to coexist or find some diplomatic off-ramp with these savages.” He’s also likely to add fuel to Israel’s fire against Iran, who Rubio is “obsessed” with. He’s accepted millions of dollars from pro-Israel groups throughout his career, and supports Trump’s plan to deport students who protest against Israel.

Is there anything good to say about this man? Seems to have sound positions on Ukraine?

Government Experience: U.S Senator from Florida (2011 – present), Member of the Florida House of Representatives (2000-2008), Speaker of the Florida House of Representatives (2006-2008)


Howard Lutnick, Secretary of Commerce

NASHVILLE, TN - Howard Lutnick, CEO of Cantor Fitzgerald gives his speech at the 2024 Bitcoin Conference in Nashville, TN. (Photo by Johnnie Izquierdo for The Washington Post via Getty Images)

Photo by Johnnie Izquierdo for The Washington Post via Getty Images

Job Description: Promoting American businesses and industries; fostering, promoting, and developing the foreign and domestic commerce.

What’s His Deal? Lutnick is the CEO of Cantor Fitzgerald. He donated $1 million to Trump’s Super PAC and has a dynamic range of potential conflicts in his current role (overseeing Trump’s transition) due to his involvement with firms regulated by the agencies for which he is currently selecting leadership.

Lutnick is considered one of the most “iconic figures” of 9/11, having missed the fate that claimed 658 of his firm’s 960 employees because he was taking his son to kindergarten, and was searching for his brother and other employees at the site when the second tower collapsed. His philanthropic activities include a fund for families of 9/11 victims that is now a fund for all disaster victims. He agrees with RFK that vaccines cause autism and plans to make America great again by cutting taxes and raising tariffs.

Is there anything good to say about this man? His various philanthropic endeavors have delivered millions of dollars of relief to victims of Hurricane Sandy and the Moore Tornado in Oklahoma as well as families of 9/11 victims. His Global Charity Day events have raised $113 million dollars.

Government Experience: None


Brooke Rollins, Secretary of Agriculture

WASHINGTON, DC - DECEMBER 16: Brooke Rollins, Assistant to the President for Strategic Initiatives, listens as Kellyanne Conway, Counselor to the President of the United States and White House Advisor, answers questions after an on-camera interview at the White House on December 16, 2019 in Washington, DC. Conway criticized former FBI Director James Comey and defended President Trump against Democrats in the Impeachment proceedings during the interview. (Photo by Samuel Corum/Getty Images)

Photo by Samuel Corum/Getty Images)

Job Description: Oversees the USDA —  farm and nutrition programs, food stamps, forestry, home and farm lending, food safety, animal health, agricultural research and rural development.

What’s her deal? The chief executive, president and co-founder of the pro-Trump America First Policy Institute grew up on a farm in Texas where she was a 4-H member and Future Farmers of America member. At Texas A&M she was a Fish Camp counselor, Cotton Bowl Classic Queen and the university’s first female student body president. As president of Texas Public Policy Foundation, she pushed to have Christianity further infiltrate civic life and promoted fossil fuels. Deep ties to the oil and gas industry and to Project 2025.

During Trump’s first term, she served as director of the Office of American Innovation and acting director of the Domestic Policy Council. She calls immigration a thing that was formerly “a labor-market phenomenon” that has become “a national security crisis driven by trafficking cartels and their state sponsors.” I hope someone tells her that at least 44% of farmworkers in the U.S. are undocumented.

I cannot figure out exactly what weird shadow government theory she is discussing here but truly when I look into her eyes I think she is capable of really terrible things

Is there anything good to say about this woman? No

Government experience: Acting director of the United States Domestic Policy Council during Trump’s first term.


Doug Burgum, Secretary of the Interior

MILWAUKEE, WISCONSIN - JULY 16: North Dakota Gov. Doug Burgum speaks with an attendee of the 2024 Republican National Convention at the Fiserv Forum on July 16, 2024 in Milwaukee, Wisconsin. The RNC continues on it's second day following the formal nomination of Republican presidential candidate former President Donald Trump for the GOP nomination in the 2024 U.S. Presidential election and Sen. J.D. Vance (R-OH) to be his Vice President. (Photo by Michael M. Santiago/Getty Images)

(Photo by Michael M. Santiago/Getty Images)

Job Description: Responsible for the management and conservation of most federal land and natural resources.

What’s his deal? One of the richest politicians in the U.S. with a $1+ billion dollar net worth (from his software companies and investment firms), Burgum says he will establish U.S. energy dominance by cutting “unnecessary regulation” and “favoring innovation.” The Sierra Club is alarmed, as are numerous environmental groups who fear him turning America’s public lands into “an even bigger cash cow for the oil and gas industry” or shrink our parks and national monuments.

He’s signed anti-LGBTQ+ bills in North Dakota including bills banning gender-affirming care for minors, restricting drag shows, and banning trans people from using bathrooms or showers aligned with their gender identity in prisons, domestic violence shelters, and state universities.

Is There Anything Good To Say About This Man: He got positive marks from some Native American tribal leaders in his state for “improving North Dakota’s once-tenuous relationship with local tribes.” Progressive Democrat Jared Huffman, senior member of the House natural resources committee, says Trump’s choice “could be worse for sure.” In 2021, said he believed climate change was real and wanted to make North Dakota carbon neutral.

Government experience:  North Dakota governor (2016 – present)


Tulsi Gabbard, Director of National Intelligence

Former US Representative Tulsi Gabbard speaks during a Turning Point Action 'United for Change' campaign rally for former US President and Republican presidential candidate Donald Trump at Thomas & Mack Center in Las Vegas, Nevada, on October 24, 2024. (Photo by Patrick T. Fallon / AFP) (Photo by PATRICK T. FALLON/AFP via Getty Images)

Photo by PATRICK T. FALLON/AFP via Getty Images

Job Description: Head of the U.S Intelligence Community, oversees and directs the implementation of the National Intelligence Program, principal advisor to the President, NSC and HSC for intelligence matters.

What’s her deal? Gabbard is a tricky one and difficult to summarize because she is really such a kook who has been on so many journeys in her relatively short life! She’s a military veteran, the first American Samoan and practicing Hindu elected to congress, and a former Democrat who endorsed Biden in 2020 before gradually shifting conservative, leaving the party in 2022 and speaking at CPAC that year. Even as a Democrat, she held a mix of sound positions (legalizing marijuana, ending the failed ‘war on drugs’ and cash bail) and not-so-sound positions (working for an anti-gay-marriage PAC from 1998-2004 and supporting anti-LGBTQ legislation). As far as her new role goes, Dems have expressed concern that she’s “basically said good things” about Assad and Putin and the intelligence community is plainly “alarmed.” She has deep ties to Hindu nationalism. She has no intelligence background and has “taken public policy positions that echo Russian propaganda.”

Is there anything good to say about this woman? Well, The New York Post hates her for “falsely accusing the US of being the driver of war” and not being aggressive enough w/r/t war.

Government Experience: Member of the U.S. House of Representatives from Hawaii (2013-2021), Vice Chair of the Democratic National Committee (2013-2016), Member of the Honolulu City Council (2011-2012), Member of the Hawaii House of Representatives (2002-2004)


Chris Wright, Secretary of Energy

chris wright

Job Description: Duties related to the generation and use of energy, one of the primary responsibility-holders for the nation’s nuclear weapon stash.

What’s his deal? Wright is a fossil fuel executive and fracking magnate who earns $5.6 million a year from fracking company Liberty Energy and donated generously to Trump’s campaign. He completely discounts the existence of a climate crisis, the rise of extreme weather, and the need for an energy transition, and he opposes clean energy government subsidies, which he claims help rich people while making other people poor. He discounts the scientific consensus that greenhouse gas emissions have led to a warming planet and believes fossil fuel and fracking will lift people out of poverty worldwide. He plans to weaken or reverse Biden’s commitment to regulating carbon pollution and increase electric war production. He drank fracking fluid on camera in 2019 to prove that it’s not dangerous and will definitely will be doing everything he can to destroy this wretched planet.

Is there anything good to say about this man? No

Government Experience: None


Linda McMahon, Secretary of Education

UNITED STATES - SEPTEMBER 12: Linda McMahon, former administrator of the U.S. Small Business Administration, speaks during a discussion hosted by America First Policy Institute (AFPI) and The Abraham Accords Peace Institute, in Washington D.C., on Monday, September 12, 2022. The event marked the second anniversary of the Abraham Accords with Israel and its regional neighbors. Jared Kushner, former senior advisor to President Donald Trump, participated in the discussion. (Tom Williams/CQ-Roll Call, Inc via Getty Images)

(Tom Williams/CQ-Roll Call, Inc via Getty Images)

Job Description: Deals with federal influence over education policy, including school choice, civil rights in schools and administering school loans.

What’s her deal? She led the Small Business Administration during Trump’s first term and is co-chairing his transition while also working for the Trump-forward America First Policy Institute. Prior to all this, she transformed the World Wrestling Entertainment into a multibillion dollar enterprise, which makes her, at least, sort of interesting. Her only relevant education experience is a Connecticut State Board of Education stint in 2009-2010, an appointment challenged even then for her lack of experience. She now claims her time on the board of trustees at Sacred Heart University in Connecticut is Experience.

Like Trump’s appointment of Betsy DeVos in 2016, we’ve got an enemy of public education assigned to oversee public education. When it comes to K-12, she’s a big “parent choice” gal. She’s likely to echo Trump’s commitments to school prayer, “rooting out the woke DEI initiatives,” killing “critical race theory,” and withholding funding from schools that acknowledge the existence of trans people and attempt to make their lives livable. She wants to “align the nation’s education system more closely with the real vision of the American founders” which is not great!

Is there anything good to say about this woman? She favors expanding the Pell Grant and was pro-choice at some point.

Government experience: Led SBA during Trump’s first term. Failed senate campaign.

Oh and: In October, she was named as a defendant in a lawsuit for her alleged knowledge of “open rampant abuse” of young boys by a WWE ringside announcer. She and her husband are accused of knowing this man’s “peculiar and unnatural interest” in young boys and allowing it to transpire.


Kristi Noem, Secretary of Homeland Security

South Dakota Governor Kristi Noem speaks before former US President and Republican presidential candidate Donald Trump takes the stage during a Buckeye Values PAC Rally in Vandalia, Ohio, on March 16, 2024. (Photo by KAMIL KRZACZYNSKI / AFP) (Photo by KAMIL KRZACZYNSKI/AFP via Getty Images)

Photo by KAMIL KRZACZYNSKI/AFP via Getty Images

Job Description: Will oversee the third-largest department of the U.S. government with components including ICE (Immigration and Customs Enforcement), the TSA, Customs and Border Protection, FEMA, the Coast Guard, and the Secret Service.

What’s her Deal? She famously shot and killed her family dog dead in a gravel pit because he “ruined the [pheasant] hunt.” Like so many of Trump’s nominees, she has no relevant qualifications for the role. She signed a law prohibiting trans girls from competing in sports matching their gender identity (despite, btw, there not being any trans girls playing sports in her entire state), opposes “critical race theory,” and proudly maintained minimal restrictions for South Dakotans during the height of the COVID-19 pandemic despite the state’s high per capita death toll. She has bad relationships with local Native American tribes, and pushed the narrative “that Mexican cartels were running rampant in the state’s tribal nations.” With the help of private donations, she sent South Dakota National Guard members to Texas to “help out” at the border. In her book, she claimed to have met Kim Jong Un (she did not) and also to have a meeting with French president Emmanuel Macron (she did not) that she cancelled because he made a “very pro-Hamas” comment to the press.

She’s called for the punishment of Democratic “sanctuary cities” and in general seems to be aligned with Trump’s assorted illogical, impractical, and bigoted plans for immigration and the border.

Is there anything good to say about this woman? No

Government Experience: Governor of South Dakota, Member of the U.S House of Representatives from South Dakota (2011 – 2019), South Dakota House of Representatives (2007-2011).


Russel Vought, Director of the Office of Management and Budget

WASHINGTON, DC - March 11: Office of Management and Budget Acting Director Russell Vought, takes questions from reporters during a press briefing in the Brady Press Briefing Room of the White House, on March 11, 2019, in Washington, DC.(Photo by Oliver Contreras/For The Washington Post via Getty Images)

(Photo by Oliver Contreras/For The Washington Post via Getty Images)

Job Description: Produces the president’s budget, examines agency programs and policies to evaluate their conformity with president’s aims.

What’s his deal? A Christian Nationalist and a major player in crafting Project 2025, Vaught helped craft a few executive orders for Trump to implement on Day One, including one that’d enable Trump to fire a bunch of civil servants. During Trump’s first term as OMB leader, published memo encouraging divestment from any agency spending related to training around “critical race theory’ or “white privilege.” Big advocate for recess appointments, which enable Trump to bypass Senate approval. Refused to meet with Biden’s team for transition. Wants to gut the FBI and end the politicial independence of the U.S. Justice Department.

Is there anything good to say about this man? There is not.

Government Experience: Served as Director of the Office of Management and Budget during Trumps first term.


Pam Bondi, Attorney General

Former Florida attorney general Pam Bondi speaks at CPAC at the Hyatt Regency in Orlando on Friday, Feb. 26, 2021. After Matt Gaetz withdrew his nomination for U.S. attorney general, President-elect Donald Trump tapped Bondi as his new choice to fill the position. (Stephen M. Dowell/Orlando Sentinel/Tribune News Service via Getty Images)

Stephen M. Dowell/Orlando Sentinel/Tribune News Service via Getty Images

Job Description: Head of the Department of Justice, chief law enforcement officer of the federal government.

What’s Her Deal? Bondi is a longtime Trump alley who served on his defense team during his first impeachment trial and in 2013 called off joining a lawsuit against Trump University after Trump dropped a donation into her re-election PAC. The “fundraising controversies” section is the longest section on her Wikipedia. She’s a friend of Sean Hannity and a frequent Fox News guest who currently leads the legal arm of right-wing dark money think tank America First Policy Institute and participated heavily in discourse and lawsuits around Trump’s voter fraud claims in 2020. She fought against marriage equality in Florida and has sketchy ties to Russia.

Is there anything good to say about this woman? She is not Matt Gaetz.

Government experience: Attorney General of Florida (2011-2019)


Pete Hegseth, Secretary of Defense

NEW YORK, NEW YORK - JULY 19: FOX anchor Pete Hegseth and meteorologist Janice Dean are on stage as Phil Vassar performs on "FOX & Friends" All-American Summer Concert Series on July 19, 2019 in New York City. (Photo by John Lamparski/Getty Images)

Photo by John Lamparski/Getty Images

Job Description: Oversees the armed forces and reports directly to the president in his capacity as the military’s commander-in-chief.

What’s his deal? Pete is a highly decorated former Army National Guard officer, Fox News political commentator, Fox & Friends weekend co-host, and noted Christian Nationalist Zionist who doesn’t wash his hands and believes college students are learning too much about the environment and not enough about Islamic extremism. He opposes Putin and Russia but opposes “wokeness” more. He wants to carpet-bomb Iran and give the West Bank to Israel. He defends January 6th attackers as “patriots.” He believes Islamic extremism is the biggest threat to our national security and wants the U.S. to curb its Muslim population.

He has defended war crimes including the murder of civilians in Iraq and torturing inmates at Guantanamo Bay. He was amongst the twelve National Guard volunteers “excused” from working Biden’s inauguration due to “extremist” political views, although Hegseth has claimed his dismissal was due to his Jerusalem Cross tattoo. His proposed adjustments to the U.S military include axing DEI programs and the phrase “our diversity is our strength,” getting women out of combat roles and trans people out of the military altogether. He thinks Omicron was invented by Democrats to help them win the 2022 midterms, George Floyd died of a drug overdose, and the Holocaust was enacted by “German socialists.” Even Jonathan Chait finds Hegseth’s beliefs bone-chilling.

He once accidentally permanently injured a West Point drummer with an axe during an axe-throwing Flag Day segment on Fox News.

Is there anything good to say about this man? No

Government Experience: None

Oh and: He paid off a conservative group staffer who accused him of sexually assaulting her in a hotel room. He also cheated on his second wife with a Fox news producer, an affair which resulted in the birth of a child.


Robert F. Kennedy Jr, Secretary of Health and Human Services

NEW YORK, NEW YORK - JULY 14: Democratic presidential candidate Robert F. Kennedy Jr. visits "Fox & Friends" at Fox News Channel Studios on July 14, 2023 in New York City. (Photo by John Lamparski/Getty Images)

(Photo by John Lamparski/Getty Images)

Job Description: Oversees 11 agencies including the FDA, CDC and NIH, serves as principal advisor to the President on health, welfare and income security programs.

What’s his deal? RFK, a noted leader in the field of COVID-19 misinformation, drinks unpasteurized milk exclusively, takes a self-prescribed regimen of “organic testosterone,” never eats before noon, and has a dead worm in his brain. His relevant policy positions include skepticism towards vaccines, medical journals, Big Pharma, and food manufacturers. He opposes fluoridating water, a practice which the CDC has honored for its dramatic reduction of tooth decay. Kennedy has asserted that fluoride makes kids gay or trans as well as causing arthritis and bone cancer.

He has been described as “an anti-vaccine paranoid crank who has a trail of dead children in Samoa.” His friends and family describe him as a man “who has championed important environmental causes” but also has “an unnerving ease with blending fact and fiction,” a “powerful ability to deny the collateral damage of his own destructive actions,” and a “pathological need for attention.” He’s published books on topics like “why his cousin didn’t actually murder the teenage girl he was imprisoned for murdering” and “the dangers of vaccines.” The farming industry considers him “a threat to American agriculture.” He backs bans on gender-affirming treatments like puberty blockers and hormone therapy for minors and claims HIV is not the cause of AIDS — poppers are.

Is There Anything Good To Say About This Man: He has mostly sound views about climate change and environmental conservation. But that is not the role he will be taking in this administration.

Government Experience: Unsuccessful 2024 presidential campaign

Oh and: He was accused of sexual assault by his babysitter. Kennedy denied the allegations while also claiming he is “not a church boy… I have so many skeletons in my closet.” He is described by family and peers as a sex addict who would “sleep with an Ottoman.” He compulsively cheated on his wife, Mary Richardson, who died by suicide in 2012.

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Riese

Riese is the 43-year-old Co-Founder of Autostraddle.com as well as an award-winning writer, video-maker, LGBTQ+ Marketing consultant and aspiring cyber-performance artist who grew up in Michigan, lost her mind in New York and now lives in Los Angeles. Her work has appeared in nine books, magazines including Marie Claire and Curve, and all over the web including Nylon, Queerty, Nerve, Bitch, Emily Books and Jezebel. She had a very popular personal blog once upon a time, and then she recapped The L Word, and then she had the idea to make this place, and now here we all are! In 2016, she was nominated for a GLAAD Award for Outstanding Digital Journalism. She's Jewish and has a cute dog named Carol. Follow her on twitter and instagram.

Riese has written 3279 articles for us.

18 Comments

  1. Honestly, it is so hard for non-Americans to understand how this situation has come to pass. This parade of loons is fabulously illustrative of our utter bewilderment. You poor fuckers.

  2. Working Class Butch Latina here-my Mexican family is OBSESSED with these people and cheer in spanish family group chats. they believe they will protect the border from malandros and sicarios that do brutalize our CA barrios which UCLA kids and queer magazine writers will never know a friend gunned down by a sicario for simply walking or working for the wrong restaurant. I had the gift of going to school and embracing more ideas BUT to think any of these people as pure evil
    isn’t it. They cried during Rubios speech even lesbians from my hometown. Human life and american life and queer life is more varied than you think. I’m willing to give them a chance if they do in fact protect my family better

    • Trump’s victory is inexplicable to non-Americans like myself (I live in New Zealand) but we need to understand how his victory came about – your comment provides some explanation. It still doesn’t make rational sense that a convicted sex offender is seen as a leader who will make people safer….but on reflection, it makes a horrible kind of sense in a dystopian nation like the US. What a world we live in.

      • Please don’t entertain a bot. You are a white person from Aotearoa so you’re probably projecting white guilt, but this person is peak bot using every Latin American stereotype in one. There are no sicarios in fucking LA lmao. Their comment doesn’t explain shit.

        • i never said LA- i said UCLA kids don’t understand. ever hear of Goshen CA? but sure i don’t support them but my friends and family do. im not abandoning them because they think differently from me.call me a bot all you want but some of us have different lives than you ok?

          • Anyone insisting malandros and sicarios are brutalizing california or colorado or w/e are lying out of their ass. The border is not that kind of crisis, it’s a humanitarian crisis from how the US functions as a capitalist/colonial project

  3. Ok then our family friend isn’t dead. me vale vergaa-thanks for telling me that the violence isn’t real and it’s all about US colonialism lmao. it’s part of the story but not the whole thing and who is getting the shit end of the stick? latin first gen immigrants caught in the mix. take your pinche third gen sociology degree and tell working class immigrant families how it is. you think i love this? that i love republicans? you’re just another pocho trying to act tough and pretend the world doesn’t exist outside your privileged circle. and yeah being a shitty paid writer or cocktail waitress or barista in a big city is privileged-but a pocho forgets

  4. What is really gonna be hilarious (for me laughing at the MAGA loons) is when they start kicking people out of the military (trans, women, etc) and need more bodies. With enlistments down, how will they fill them? Draft, baby, draft. All the incels, drafted. Let’s not forget when they deport people, who will fill those jobs? Poor kids that don’t need to go to school. Eh, who needs public school for anyone. Put them kids to work in the fields.

    People really have no idea what Project 2025 is and protest voters (Gaza) and people who didn’t vote, you own this fucking mess.

    • I really appreciate the dedication to finding anything at all positive about some of these people even if it’s unrelated to their position or politics in general.

      But yeah, either way it’s really stressful and overwhelming thinking of all the damage these people could do.

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