Welcome to the first recap of the third season of The L Word: Generation Q, brought to you by the same network that brought you the original L Word, a show that asked and never quite answered the question: Nipple Confidence?
My friends, it is an undeniable thrill to be back here in this space with you, writing Generation Q recaps, nose-diving head-first into a long-awaited frothy sea of Sapphic Chaos. As you know, Angie still has her kidney. Let’s dig in.
As the moon resigns and the sun wakes to rise, as the tides ebb and flow, as hurricanes gather and storms fill the clouds, as babies are birthed braying into the sanitized hospital air and tennis players are given fatal illnesses and left to die while their exes make small talk in a hospital courtyard, as wars rage and peace screams for attention, as the stars and LAPD helicopters light up the night sky and parents tuck their children into bed, so too do Bette Porter and Tina Kennard return to one another, over and over again, forever and ever, as predictable as the aforementioned rising sun, as inevitable as a tornado’s restless eye. And we, mere mortals, bear witness to this clash of legends, to The Song of Bette and Tina, Chapter 75, Verse 16.
As you recall, dear reader, we last left these fine young cannibals at a pivotal moment. Pippa was stepping out of a shiny car into her Fancy Art Show Debut, looking fantastic. Bette was at home but on her way out to meet Pippa — adorned in a killer white powersuit and armed with a penchant for sending conflicting romantic signals — when Bette opened her very own door to find a surprise guest on her doorstep. It was not, unfortunately for me personally, a Girl Scout selling cookies. Instead, it was the one, the only, the formidable TINA KENNARD.
We return to exactly that same spot: Bette dressed up to go out, Tina entering the foyer.
I can’t *believe* you almost hooked Angie up with one of those scammy college admissions consultants who place students on niche sports teams to get them unearned spots at elite schools
Well to be fair Tina I was too absorbed in my own personal drama to pay attention to the news cycle that year
Tina’s got one question for Our Lady of Porter: “are you in love with me?” I think we all know the answer to this question (yes). Tina chastises Bette for destroying her romance with Groupon Queen Carrie — a woman for whom all of us would lay down our lives — but defers Bette’s offers to fix it. Because there’s no fixing the fact that Tina is — just like you! — in love with Bette Porter.
Tina: “I’ve loved you my whole life.”
Bette: “And I’ve loved you all of mine.”
Tina: “I just wish that you were fucking better at it.”
Tina storms out. Bette does a good old fashioned primal scream:
TINNNAAAAAAAAAA
And her voice goes out into all of the earth, her words echo across the canyons of the world!
We then leap into our DeLoreans and race down the runway into a whole entire year later, where Alice is engaging in sexual intercourse with a mysterious alleged member of Generation Z I have identified as “Teddy,” played by Chris Renfro, who played Daddius in the short-lived Peacock reboot Queer as Folk. I love this crossover episode and a classic silly Alice sex scene.
Ok tiny kisses are cute but can you go back to the big thrusts
Sex Scene #1: Why Don’t You F*ck Me On Your Livestream
Participants: Alice & Teddy
Materials: He wants to f*ck her face! He wants to watch her f*ck her clone! He wants to f*ck her on his livestream! Alice says yes to everything except the livestream, because she is famous! Good on Alice for setting boundaries.
We then transition into an enormous apartment that quite possibly is the apartment Shane’s had all along but newly redecorated. It is hereby christened The Shess Shack. Last we left these two, they were 11 days into their relationship and Tess had announced her intention to move to Las Vegas to care for her ailing mother and subsequently asked Shane to come with her to Vegas.
It’d appear that they listened to our podcast and therefore chose a far superior, third option: bringing Mom to Los Angeles. You know what I always say: “What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas, unless it’s your Mom getting sick and then she should come to Los Angeles.” So we meet Tess’s former showgirl Mom Patty, no relation to Peppermint, who is played by Joanna Cassidy (aka Margaret Chenoweth on Six Feet Under, my favorite show of all time).
Come a little closer dear I just wanna feel for myself if your shirt is one mutil-colored t-shirt or three t-shirts combined into one t-shirt
Tess and Shane are in a tizzy regarding an MS Society Fundraiser they’re hosting that evening and Shane’s manhandling an assortment of prescription medications for Patty when Gloria the nurse arrives.
Tess’s attempts to canoodle with Shane in the living room are rebuffed by Shane, who is too modest to make out in front of people’s Moms. Everybody knows Shane is much better at making out with people’s Moms, hey-o! Anyhow, Shane and Tess shuffle into the lower level of this behemoth residence to steal additional sexual moments together.
Did you steal my peppermint chapstick again
Even safely downstairs, Shane’s still uneasy about having full sex right underneath Patty, but Shane cannot resist Tess’s wiles and eventually caves to the makeout. I just dropped a blueberry on the ground and I’m not sure where it is or if I’ll ever see it again.
Speaking of hot people being hot, we dash on over to Dani’s Castle in the Sky, where Gigi and Dani are looking extremely hot and lightly teasing the prospect of a top-off before Gigi gets off Dani’s top, announcing she’s gotta dash due to a traffic situation in Los Angeles, the innermost circle of hell. Specifically, Beverly is down to just one lane! Dani has a great idea to fix this chronic civic issue: Gigi should simply move in! I’m going to run for mayor of Los Angeles on this exact platform.
C’mon we’d have so much fun as roommates I could make you fresh coffee every morning—
Babe shoving a Nespresso pod in a machine isn’t making fresh coffee
Dani expositions that this has been the hardest year of her life — I imagine perhaps this is related to the ambiguous incarceration of her father, Lex Luthor — and Gigi’s been there for her all this time. Most L Word relationships transition into cohabitation immediately so bravo to them for taking it slow.
“Of course I wanna live with you,” Gigi says breathily, before delivering a crushing blow: she’s just gotta check with Nat first! Because of the kiddos. This feels like an extremely reasonable next move, but Dani’s face suggests she doesn’t agree with me on that.
At last we are now returning to the esteemed California University: the former employer of Bette Porter, legendary dean of the art school best known for banging an intern (Nadia) and the visiting artist (Jodi Lerner) and then cheating on Jodi with Tina (Tina), thus inspiring Jodi Lerner’s unforgivable video art installation “Core.” It appears Angie is joining the Cal freshman class, hoping to one day appear in an alumni newsletter with Brandon Walsh, Nadia the Intern, and Zach Morris.
Why do I look more hungover than all of these college freshmen
Alice, exuding a post-coital glow from her romp with Teddy, is extolling the virtues of Gen Z — they’re hot! they’re smart! they’re bi! they don’t want the white picket fence! — in what feels like a self-soothing mechanism. She concludes that she was ahead of her time, and I agree. Shane’s bummed about a makeup artist cancelling for their MS fundraiser and Alice volunteers her Glam Team, thus saving the day.
Hark, look who’s here!
Oh THAT’S why the registrar asked “any relation to Bette Porter”
Angie asks where her Moms are which bring us to the best part of every season premiere that occurs after a lengthy time jump: EXPOSITION!
Firstly: Tina and Bette have been in touch this year, but mostly regarding logistics such as college tours.
Secondly: Shane’s all “domesticated” and grown up now that she’s living with Tess and caring for Peppermint Patty Chenoweth. (I changed my mind and decided there indeed is a relationship to Peppermint Patty.)
Thirdly: Bette’s been doing a lot of “personal work” of her own and “reflecting.” Furthermore, Tina is fine, totally fine, and not feeling even remotely weird about apparently seeing Bette for the first time in a long time.
Okay, soooo which one of you two told Angie the best way to make new friends at college was to sell weed
“Speak of the devil,” Shane gestures towards the resplendent entrance to the University Drop-Off-Area as Bette Porter herself pulls up in her Tesla, gazing at Tina as Tina gazes at her, radiating effortless calm and cool which is immediately disrupted by a careless child recklessly parking her car directly behind Bette Porter’s car and subsequently ramming it right in the rear.
Stand back I think Heads Will Roll Kroll is heading our way
Shane, Alice and Tina assume Bette’s gonna unleash her documented road rage upon this poor soul, but this is new Bette! Evolved Bette. I’ve Done A Lot Of Personal Work Bette. When the student emerges crying from her car, Bette has nothing but serene words to share: “the only thing you have to do is hold compassion for yourself and enjoy move-in day.”
It’s okay, it’s okay, you’re not the first crying freshman to realize they’re a lesbian after being held closely to my chest
Ladies and gentlepeople, I would like to introduce you to…. THE NEW BETTE PORTER:
As Alice and Shane head upstairs with Angie and her possessions, Tina remarks fondly that she’d expected Bette to “bite that girl’s head off.”
“Well, we’re all gonna die,” Bette recites my own personal life philosophy. “So what’s a little bumper?”
You might not know this Tina but actually Bed Bath & Beyond does these coupons for 20% off everything in the store
Over at FiSoMi’s, Sophie’s panicking about Finley’s impending return to her home and into her arms, as apparently Alice paid for Finley to not only attend rehab but also sober living, both events consuming the entirety of a calendar year. Amid her compulsive rearranging of objects, Sophie finds a cute small box atop a dresser and pops it right open.
You ALSO keep all of your baby teeth in a tiny box???
It’s a ring! It’s true: Micah’s gonna pop the question to Maribel!!! But before we can get into the details of this premature predicament, FINLEY’S HOME!!!
Well you are … just as hot as I remembered
I know
Finley drops her garbage bag suitcase and embraces her one true love, Sophie Suarez, who immediately spills that Micah’s gonna propose to Maribel, and Finley greets Micah, and everybody is home again. Most importantly to me: #SINLEY IS STILL ON.
Sophie and Finley relocate to a local civic park to discuss Finley’s experiences in rehab, which she testifies were just like 28 Days. Finley’s pretty bright-eyed about her sober future, certain she’s ready now to give Sophie what she needs, and Sophie’s trying her hardest to believe in this bright turnaround, too.
Not wasting any time or conforming to the actual guidelines for amends in the AA program such as asking for Sophie’s consent to be amended upon at this moment — Finley unpacks a square of paper containing her ambiguous apologies to Sophie and begins to read.
Remember when you said your first night back you wanted to drink a bunch of cran-raspberry juice, put on Radiohead and make out, is that still in the cards or—
Oh yeah. Big time.
Finley confesses that when they were together she couldn’t see Sophie or consider her the way she’d like to, which was because she couldn’t see herself. “I’m sorry you had to take care of me and I’m sorry that I couldn’t see that the intervention was an act of love,” says Finley, which is a really generous re-framing of a truly unhinged intervention, and also re-writing history because we actually rarely saw Sophie taking care of Finley, usually she was just as drunk! “I’m sorry that I haven’t loved you the way you deserve to be loved, because you really deserve to be loved, well. Thank you for saving my life because you did, but you shouldn’t have had to. But thank you.”
C’mon lemme feel the forearm muscles you developed playing table tennis in sober living
Now that this amend is done and dusted, Finley moves on to discussing her optimistic plan for the future: she’s gonna get a job with benefits and a car and maybe go back to school? Sophie congratulates her on this unrealized dream. Finley promises to always be honest with Sophie and they laugh and kiss and roll around and it’s super cute and I hope that after this, perhaps off-camera in some tender night of the soul, they sit down and talk about how Sophie can support Finley in her sobriety and what this means for their relationship in general!
Back at California University, Shane and Alice are imploring Angie to call them if in need, while Bette and Tina are hovering, trying as always to resist the urge to plow over Angie with their overwhelming need to hold her extremely close while also respecting her independence as an autonomous human being. They offer her cash and then, in the grand tradition of mothers with smartphones, try to corral Angie into a selfie. She wisely refuses.
And remember if any sketchy characters on campus try to give you a lollipop, it’s probably fentanyl
The Moms have just begun their exit through the hallway when Angie pops out and calls them back for a hug, to tell them she loves them. Bette is crying. It’s very cute.
Tina, who previously told Shane she couldn’t attend tonight’s benefit, asks Bette if she’s going to the benefit and when Bette says yes Tina turns her frown (no) upside down (yes) ’cause she’s got a big fat lesbian crush on The New Bette Porter! Despite her professional success, ultimately Bette’s always been a bit resistant to acknowledging that she still has work to do on herself. But her newfound dedication to that work is giving Tina the ability to feel hopeful about their future for the first time in a long time. Maybe this time getting back together will be less like “returning to their old ways” and more like “growing up together.”
Then Bette gets a call — it’s Pippa, who’s doing a show in South Africa, and Tina tries not to have a visible emotional reaction to this call. She mostly succeeds.
At last, the moment we’ve all been waiting for: a Las Vegas Themed MS Society Fundraiser at The Dana Fairbanks Memorial Tavern! Tess opens the Silent Auction with a head-to-toe makeover from The Aloce Show’s Glam Squad, before Dani ushers Tess offstage to confer about the evening’s prospective revenue pull — they need $5k to break even but me and Dani are confident this figure will be handily exceeded. I think $5k is probably like, Bette’s monthly Erewhon budget.
But if there is no spring in your step and no junk in your trunk then you WILL be eliminated!
Over at the bar, Alice and Shane relay to Tina that Bette and Pippa are simply friends now, that Bette apologized to Pippa and somehow this apology went well. The New Bette!!!
Tina shares that this isn’t the case with Carrie — Carrie’s shut Tina out like a cold potato on a hot winter evening. And then who should arrive at the event than the one and only Bette Serenity Porter: breezy, beautiful, wearing an off-the-shoulder situation and a smile.
Why don’t you both just try one kiss just one kiss
“It’s nice to see you out in the world,” Bette says to Tina like it’s a wink.
“Same,” Tina volleys.
“Same,” Alice sips her drink.
Just directly outside the bustling venue, Dani approves of Micah’s ring for Maribel and expresses lament regarding Gigi’s insistence on checking in with Nat prior to signing a lease with her beloved hottie girlfriend.
I think I just peed a little
Inside, Maribel’s got a complaint: Finley’s back and Mari thinks Sophie’s gonna be in trouble. Sophie says she’s so happy, bro! Maribel says Finley ruined Sophie’s wedding. I disagree, I think Finley’s cameo at the wedding was a thrilling dramatic twist that saved all of us from Dani and Sophie’s doomed union and in turn enabled us all to eventually witness something extraordinary: Gigi and Dani making out. It is true that Finley peed in Dani’s hallway, but, in Finley’s defense, there’s a severe lack of public restrooms in this municipality! Maribel thinks Finley and Sophie are toxic together, but Sophie says actually Finley has changed and is so good for real.
Eh, I’m pretty sure Zanab was overreacting in the Cuties conversation
Uh yeah sure only if you forget LITERALLY EVERYTHING ELSE COLE SAID TO HER ALL SEASON THAT LED TO HER BEING SO SENSITIVE IN THE FIRST PLACE!
Meanwhile, Finley’s hovering in the backroom of Dana’s Memorial Tavern preparing to spring her amends upon Shane and Tess without warning or requesting an ideal time in which to do so! They arrive and Finley’s barely gotten into apologizing for being drunk before work, during work and after work, when Shane interrupts to acknowledge that she also is often drunk before, during and after work JUST KIDDING LOL!!!!! Shane interrupts to say that Finley’s got nothing to be sorry for and Tess agrees that Finley’s family and you know what they say about family: “family has nothing to be sorry for.” Tess really should know that it’s important for Finley to perform her entire amends from top to bottom but I will let it go because we’re all going to die so what’s a little bumper.
Oh my god babe I think Finley’s wearing your tank top
I don’t know how to BUY SHIRTS!
Then, Shane and Tess immediately invite the newly-sober Finley to return to work AT A BAR and rather than being terrified by this prospect, Finley’s absolutely ecstatic. Hopefully they can just schedule her for day shifts! Also, Finley would love to speak about benefits!
At last alone in this in-between room, Shane feels a mysterious tug towards the back room, like the lion and the witch towards the wardrobe. Will she take a peak behind the curtain? Indeed she will! Then, like a very hot moth fleeing a bright burning flame, Ivy (Kehlani) emerges from the mayhem, and approaches the door Shane’s gazing through.
Sweet little figs? Anybody back here got em?
Unfortunately, Ivy doesn’t tug Shane backwards into her chamber of mystery and magic, she shuts the door right in her face.
Back on the floor of the Memorial Tavern, Bette and Tina are settling back into each other in the way you can with somebody who’s known you for all of your adult life — talking about Tina’s show which just got picked up for its ninth season, on-set drama, and Tina’s noted skills at putting out fires.
Meanwhile on the other end of the spectrum, Teddy is rambling to a very bored Alice — “my for you page really thinks I’m a poly pan queer in a long distance relationship” — when they’re interrupted by Shane who would like Alice to take note of Bette and Tina speaking amicably at the bar. Teddy starts speaking astrology to Shane who’s deeply uninterested and probably hasn’t even been bullied into joining Co-Star.
Hey Al the camera is over here
Next up is Finley, who Alice insists should stop venoming her weird amounts of money but Finey says she’s gotta pay her back for rehab!
Then Finley grabs Dani — Dani who is literally at work — and asks if now is a good time to talk. Dani says it’s not a good time to talk. Finley asks when a better time to talk would be. Dani thinks about it and then relays “never.” Which brings us to our first lesbian squabble!
Lesbian Squabble #1: The Worst Amendment
In the Ring: Finley vs. Dani
You’re not supposed to do amends with people who don’t consent to receiving them, and yet here Finley is, insisting Dani receive her amends at a time of Finley’s choosing!
“I’m just trying to apologize,” Finley manages and Dani reiterates the bad timing and location for this interaction. “You still think that what I want somehow matters less than what you want,” Dani hits back. Finley insists that’s no longer the case, but Dani keeps going:
Dani: “You know, I don’t think you’re cute.”
Finley: “That’s always been pretty clear.”
Dani: “And I don’t think you’re charming.”
Finley: “Sure but uh—”
Dani: “I think you’re fucking annoying!”
Finley: “Okay maybe if you just gave me a second—”
Dani: “What the fuck is wrong with you? I literally just said no!!!”
Who Wins? Dani.
Along with everybody present in the Dana Fairbanks Memorial Tavern this evening, Tess notices the scuffle. She feels responsible for Finley, somehow — because she worked for Tess, because she’s been there, because she knows how raw Finley still is — and knows this is an ill-advised adventure. She summarily ends the interaction.
Once Finley is safely removed from Dani’s vicinity, Dani recalibrates: enthuses that they’ve raised seven thousand dollars, an apparently impressive amount of money, emphasized by Ari and Jamie trying their absolute best to say SEVEN THOUSAND DOLLARS together like America’s Next Top Model contestants.
A MODELING CONTRACT WITH FORD MODELS A FASHION SPREAD WITH ELLE MAGAZINE AND FROM OUR FRIENDS AT COVER GIRL COSMETICS ONE HUNDRED THOUSAND DOLLARS!!!!!!!!!
Back outside, Finley’s taking a breather on her favorite place to sit after having an awkward interaction with Dani Núñez: the curb. Sophie’s already on Finley’s side, asking what Dani did to upset her, and Finley at least summons the self-awareness to push back, with her newfound interior reflection skills: “I’ve gotta think about my own part in this.” It was too soon, Finley acknowledges, Dani wasn’t ready.
You know if you’re ever feeling chilly, you could wear a jacket
Sophie says Finley’s cute when she’s serious and smoking her little Juul and Finley’s got an idea for where they could go and potentially have slightly more fun than they’re currently having. They dash off into the night, giddy and alive.
Back inside the vibrant Dana Fairbanks Memorial Tavern, Ivy’s leaning suggestively on the bar, admiring Shane’s bartender vibes. Ivy wants to apologize for rushing Shane out of the backroom — she didn’t know Shane was Shane, you know? But then she thinks she recognizes Shane from somewhere. I immediately assume they slept together in 2008, but nope! It clicks for Ivy and once it does, she leads Shane into the back to show her something: a jar of Shane for Wax pomade. The product has apparently been discontinued, but Ivy’s been scouring ebay for it and rationing it out for her personal usage.
Believe it or not, this is actually poison
Well grease me up and call me Poison Ivy then
Ivy wants Shane to style her, and Shane’s deferring in that way she does when she’s attracted to someone but somehow has found herself in yet another long term monogamous relationship, like birds. “C’mon, have some fun with me,” Ivy says seductively. Shane’s “not sure she even remembers how” but Ivy says a talent like Shane’s never goes away.
Tell me what you want
I want so many things.
But in terms of what you can do for me?
I want a change.
Shane starts touching her hair, looking into her eyeballs, making suggestions, listening to the atmospheric music laid over this little scene, but when her urge to fingerbang Ivy up against that exposed brick overwhelms her six senses, Shane pulls back.
“You don’t really have to do anything,” Shane concludes, letting go of Ivy’s hair.
Ivy says she’s gonna pack up and relieve her babysitter.
Back in the marketplace, Bette’s taking the stage: she’s auctioning off a work of art from her personal collection and it’s not just any ‘ol deer picture. It’s the Kiki Smith deer picture.
If I may have the room’s attention I am about to announce an impressive act of philanthropy
As any L Word expert with 4+ mental illness diagnoses (me) could tell you, we’ve seen this picture before. Specifically, in Episode 303 of the original series, when Bette’s passion project lost its funding, Tina yelled at her about money, and Bette was forced to consider selling some artwork from her personal collection to keep her baby nannied and herself in only the latest and most exclusive meditation caftans. But when Bette called her art dealer (?) to suggest unloading a Maplethorpe, he suggested she sell a Kiki Smith instead. Bette refused because Kiki Smith is one of the first artists Bette ever collected.
How can you be out of olive oil cake???
And now, the benevolent and evolved Bette Porter is willing to give it all away for whatever the lesbians of Silver Lake can afford in service of the MS Society. One again my friends, we see the new, transformed, Bette 2.0:
The bidding begins at $500, sending Tina into an immediate tizzy, ’cause it’s “worth way more than that.” As the stakes raise to the big One Thousand, Tina steps in with a $10,000 bid. (According to ArtNet, this print is worth $4k-$5k, so FYI Tina’s a generous philanthropist.) Bette eyes her with compassion from the stage, Tina returns her gaze with a shrug: she did what she had to do!
That’s right, Mama T’s got her own money now
Bette says Tina’s bid was unnecessary but Tina said the picture reminded her, just as it reminded me, of their old house in West Hollywood, and the art Bette refused to part with. This is now Tina’s second time saving Bette from parting with the Kiki Smith, the first time she did it by accepting a job at Helena Peabody’s ultimately notorious incubator for litigious documentarians, Shaolin Pictures. Shane and Alice excuse themselves, only to observe that Bette and Tina are exiting the building… together.
ETA: A commenter has pointed out and I have since confirmed that in fact, Bette did take the Kiki Smith off the wall at the end of Episode 303, and wrapped it in tissue paper, sighing sadly about what did appear to be her decision to sell it.
Soooo…. ?!?!?! Does anybody remember seeing this picture in her house again after this episode?
Alice says it’d be nice to have something real for herself, gazing over at her Gen Z boyfriend doing ambitious aggressive shots with the enthusiasm of a human who doesn’t remember The Gulf War and has not yet witnessed the downfall of his own pretty face. Alice realizes it’s time to cut off this intergenerational romance.
I appreciate the offer but I don’t know how to stitch a TinkTok and I have no interest in finding out
“I actually just got this last minute DJ thing at this loft space downtown,” Teddy tells her, a line that sends immediate chills down the spine of anybody over 35. Alice says it’s past her bedtime, this whole thing is kaput — but she had fun, and she says he gives her hope for future generations. “Well don’t hope too hard,” he counters. “I just did a bump of ketamine in the bathroom.”
Alice nods. “Well, you can work that out on your own time, okay?”
Ivy says “goodnight” to Shane on her way out but by “goodnight” she means, I want you to fuck me on the cement edge of a fancy swimming pool. Before Shane can dwell too excessively, Tess rushes over, bursting at the seams with enthusiasm for what she’s about to show Shane: an empty building right next to the building they were just in!
And THIS is where we’d have a big neon sign that says “The Jenny Schecter Memorial Tavern”
Tess knows they’re not doing the “marriage and kids thing” because instead they gave birth to a bar and now Tess is thinking she’s ready to buy another baby, but by “baby” she means “bar.” I hope she is giving her full-time employees benefits before considering investing in a second location but okay!
“I love our life together and I want more of it,” says Tess. “I want it all.” That’s what “wanting it all” has always meant to me personally. Not owning just one bar but owning two bars. I hope this one is also a lesbian bar, the most profitable and easily-managed type of bar in the world!
Feel that strain in your back that’s what we’ll both be feeling in our bank accounts if you purchase additional real estate
We then zoom on over to a public basketball court, where Finley’s losing the game and thus also losing her attire and in general #Sinley are just being really cute.
Oh FUCK I think I left the butt plug in
Finley would like to renegotiate the rules of strip basketball but Sophie would like to make out. “You’re still fun,” she gushes, before they smash their mouths and bodies together and say that they missed each other and Sophie’s kissing Finley’s shoulder and Finley says she wants to, she really wants to… but she feels like she should actually instead go to a meeting.
It’s Finley’s first night back and all, she says, and she just doesn’t want to fuck it up, and Sophie says that’s okay because that’s what you say when someone wants to go to a meeting. But meetings only last one hour, so they certainly could circle back to this very hot makeout!
We then return to the dormitories of the hallowed institution of California University, where Angie wants to show her visiting girlfriend Jordi her impressive closet space and where she’s hung pics of her fave babe! It’s their first night alone together — Angie’s roommate hasn’t moved in yet — and Angie would like to celebrate but Jordi would like to break up.
Okay this secret portal to a hidden dimension was NOT here when I opened my closet earlier
Jordi says that it doesn’t make much sense to stay together now that Angie’s in college and they’ll probably be totally different people soon! This was definitely true for me because I was really happy my senior year of high school and then I went to college and was really sad.
Speaking of people who are really sad:
Angie: Why couldn’t you have done this yesterday? That’s fucked up!
Jordi: This isn’t easy, Angie.
Angie: For who? Who isn’t it easy for?
Jordi: For both of us. I’ve never broken up with someone before and I don’t wanna hurt you—
Please just leave my room so I can get five candy bars from the vending machine and play geography Sporcle until my brain short-circuits
It does make sense for them to break up now that Angie’s in college, but I agree with Angie that Jordi’s timing is questionable and not ideal.
We then transition to a meeting where Finley tells the room she knocked out a bunch of amends that evening but surprisingly enough, not everyone forgave her. Also she tried to have sex with her girlfriend but choked.
I’m really glad we’re focusing on the seventh step today and Toby’s share — thank you for your share, Toby, it really resonated with me — really got me thinking about something completely unrelated to today’s topic that I was honestly planning on speaking about no matter what anybody else said today
Finley’s never quite prepared for anything, really — perhaps due to a lifetime of having minimal control over her circumstances and needing to roll with the punches — and she often seems to think that making a plan is the hardest part of doing a thing, when in fact planning is the easy part, it’s executing that plan where the real challenge lies. Finley says she made a plan in Sober Living but it’s hard now in the real world to see it through, because everything moves really fast, here. (Like her amends!) There are so many decisions to make and she wants it to be different this time but how will she know if she’s really changed?
This is the big question this episode not just for Finley but for Bette and Shane, too. Have they changed enough to make their lives and relationships work better than all the lives and relationships they’ve already lived?
Finley’s monologue continues as a voiceover as we re-visit the rest of our fine friends.
Micah’s down on one knee with his little ring box proposing to Maribel and Maribel’s like … I don’t wanna get married. I wanna have a baby! Okay Maribel!!!!
Is that a … ring pop?
Back at Chez Alice, our favorite talk show host is firing up Tamimi, an LGBTQ+ dating app that secured a solid brand partnership with Showtime, and adjusting her criteria — sliding the little latch of doom away from 25 and towards 41, where she rests, knowing that I personally am 41.
Fuck I’ve got 15 minutes to get the panagram or my whole life is meaningless
Meanwhile at the Shess Shack, Shane’s unboxing a box of her own hair products, just to see if she can cop a thrill off the remainders of an expired jar of volumizing wax. Before she can get too high on her own supply, Tess cozies up for a little pre-bed makeout.
Mmmmm, smells like pussy juice and creamed corn
Dani arrives at Gigi’s to find our favorite character in a nightshirt reading a book, because perfect women do perfect things. Dani says tonight was great! Bette asked her to do a gallery job, and Sophie’s gonna talk to Alice about Dani doing The Aloce Show’s hundredth episode! After sharing her good news she asks Gigi how it went with Nat. Gigi closes her book and looks up at Dani like somebody without any more lines in this episode.
I just got to the part of the book where Prince Harry and Alex kiss outside the New Year’s Eve party at the White House so whatever you’re interrupting me for better be good
Finley’s voiceover continues — she feels lucky to be here, just like an Oscar nominee, and feels like she’s got a real shot this time — as Finley herself arrives home. She settles into bed next to Sophie and hugs her really close in their little cloud of bedding as the camera pans over to Sophie’s phone, buzzing just a bit over a very unlikely iPhone background… IT’S A “U UP” TEXT FROM SOMEONE NAMED DRE, A U UP text! From Dre! With a RAINBOW in it.
U Up? cuz the rainbow is
We then return to where we began: The Porter House, where Bette’s made some tea for two and is ready to talk to Tina about the past entire year of her life. For example, Bette found her Mom!
As illustrated, the New Bette can raise dead parents from the grave into the discourse
Bette also testifies that she revisited the doomed Silent Meditation Retreat from Season Three — which she’d escaped after ten days — with renewed vigor, and this time she emerged victorious. As you may recall, the first time I’m not sure she was committed to meditation so much as the show was committed to masking Jennifer Beals’ pregnancy in tunics and stacks of blankets. Bette’s 2022 Meditation experience was far superior, enabling her to achieve serenity, although it probably helped that Tina wasn’t banging Henry against the wall of the nursery while Bette was trying to find inner peace in the woodlands of Southwestern Canada.
On Bette’s second day of silence, a question kept echoing: “where did the good go?” Just kidding the question was “who taught me how to love” and the answer was “Mom!” Bette realized she needed to be open to hearing from her mother and also forgiving her, which was very freeing, as was telling her Mom all about Tiny Tina and their little baby Angie.
Remember when I bought that $200 tunic for the meditation retreat and you were like “I didn’t know that you needed special clothes to meditate”
I sure the fuck do yes
But now it is late. The sky barely remembers the sun. The crickets are chirping in fields of pesticides, stars are lighting up the night sky, the tide has ebbed, the traffic is inching along one lane on Beverly, and it’s time for Tina to rest her own weary head. Before she can exit the premises, however, forces greater than all of us compel her towards Bette. They are intertwining their fingers, and leaning closer together, and then they are kissing, slow but familiar and excited because “getting back together” has always been their favorite part of the Bettinian Cycle and just as things are truly heating up and the suggestive soundtrack is screaming about feeling their feelings, there’s a click at the door and ….
Hey sorry I’ll just be a sec I realized I forgot to bring my lava lamp—
Oh —
You’ve gotta be fucking kidding me
“You’ve gotta be fucking kidding me,” Angie says, and we CUT TO BLACK.
The Round-Up:
Sex Scenes: 1 this episode, 1 all season
Squabbles: 1 this episode, 1 all season
Quote of the Week: “Well, we’re all going to die, so what’s a little bumper, right?”
Well, I hope you enjoyed this L Word Generation Q 301 recap and I personally am so excited for this season and dying to hear your thoughts on the first episode!!
Pages: 1 2 3See entire article on one page
I’m not okay
I’m so happy they fooled me/us with that promo. Hearing Bette say “yes” changed my life and the whole episode was like a fever dream after that. There were many things I didn’t like (Shane, Finley, etc) but I can’t focus on that because I’m too busy replaying Tibette scenes in my head.
well this is lovely! i am so happy that you are so happy
Sobriety plot still making zero sense and not enough Gigi IMO but it’s given me hope for the season.
when bette said “we’re all gonna die” i laughed so hard
a woman after my own heart
also a whole year of rehab and sober living feels so incredibly disproportionate to the finley’s alcoholism, like ydy finley, but good gravy
I’m so glad they revealed Alice paid for it, because it seemed entirely unbelievable that Finley could afford rehab for a year (G & I had to pause and discuss this for about ten minutes). So then it only seemed mildly unbelievable.
i skipped through a bunch of the bettina scenes so when you got to the freshman being kindly embraced by bette i thought you were doing a bit?? is that a real screenshot???
yes, it’s a real screenshot, that really happened!
I cringed through every Tibette interaction. Can’t wait for Old Bette to return and implode.
TINAAAAAAAAAA
Gen Q got good again!!
I thought this episode was a) hilarious and b) kind of moving and relatable.
I am so excited to see what happens. There’s so much potential drama.
i agree!!!
This episode makes me very optimistic for this season!! Unfortunate that they’re still committed to not quite portraying the sobriety/AA experience accurately, but it wasn’t as offensive as last season so I’ll take it.
I actually was expecting the Finley/Dani encounter to be much worse than it was – while Finley definitely shouldn’t have approached Dani at work at all, she did listen when she said no, and only really responded when Dani started yelling at her, which I do think is a normal response to your entire character being insulted! And yeah, her owning that Dani’s reaction was her own fault afterwards with Sophie showed real #growth.
Dani on the other hand…woof. I too think that Gigi talking to Nat/the kids about moving is extremely fair, and I for one am happy someone on the L Word is finally thinking of the children!! I can understand Dani being hurt/anxious about this, especially with all she’s been through, but her passive-aggression around the whole thing was real rough. I was feeling the same way as Gigi in the promo for the next episode – “stop acting like a child!”
Also, whatever the situation it is with this Dre person better not mess things up, though of course it obviously will. #sinley4evur
the dre situation is giving me big anticipatory “we were on a break” energy
and yeah dani is so quick to bristle! gigi’s need to talk to her kids’ other mom feels reasonable!
Hahaha! YES! I was thinking the same thing. Thanks for linking it, I laughed so much. We’ll see next week how much of the Rachel/Ross dynamic we will get :)
I’VE MISSED THESE RECAPS AND ALSO GIGI
Kayla are you doing recaps for the AV Club this season?
I haven’t read this recap yet because I know it’s going to be oh so good (always is Riese!) and I want to savor it from the comfort of my couch with a hot cup of tea. But I do have to say this right now…I am so vehemently opposed to a TiBette reunion that I don’t want to watch. Yep I said it! I think it’s me nearing old age and the cantankerousness that that brings because how can I not watch this show if just to see Gigi’s wonderful everything? But the writing in the first 2 seasons being brought to a 3rd season plus this TiBette toxicity? Girl…I guess. From the “this season” promo it looks like there will be a lot of throwing things and destroying property so…yeah there’s that.
okay but the “old bette” “new bette” graphics are genius, are killing me.
did u find the blueberry
unfortunately i have not and i know its ultimate reveal will be a terrifying sensory experience, although i am starting to question if i really dropped it or if i just thought i dropped it, like if it ever really existed at all
It will find you the next time you wear white and are just about to leave the house.
I know a lot of people love their relationship but if I have to sit through another season of Bette/Tina drama I’m finally giving in and accepting that there is no god.
Wow, I have so many questions…
– Why did everyone assume Maribel would say “Yes” to Micah’s proposal? The more people said it, the more certain I became that she would decline
– Don’t couples talk about whether they want to get married and have kids before proposals? It would save a lot of (TV) trouble. On the other hand, new and more original TV storylines would be needed then!
– Why did the writers let the opportunity slide of Sophie saying: “I’m sorry for the part that I played by accusing you for drunk driving when I first encouraged you” (and everything related to that) and also a “I’m sorry for the way we did the intervention, also after trying NOTHING ELSE before”
– Why would Shane and Tess give Finley her job back at a BAR after having fired her “out of love” because they were “enabling” her? Wouldn’t they think that maybe… just maybe… this could be threaten her new sobriety? Also with EVERYONE drinking around her
– Why is Finley wearing this kind of skip after we getting to know her with Calvin Klein underwear? Why are the 90s back with this kind of underwear? It will puzzle me forever!
– When will Bette return to her old self? It is just a matter of time! She cannot have changed at 180 degrees in one year, silent retreat or not. (Loved the old self-new-self photos)
– Does Finley have a history of sexualized violence? She choked… and in season 1, she had a panic attack with Rebecca… Finley mentioned never having had sex sober… It would make so much sense! I hope that if they go there, they handle it well!
– Also: Haha, so meta with Tina speaking about the 9th season of a show and other creative choices… Now that the L Word is nine seasons long and the last season got a lot of criticism… Nice one!
– Also meta: Dani saying that Finley is not cute, not funny etc. was acknowledging all the Finley haters!
And last but not least: Bette saying that we’ll all die is so relatable to me stating it… My kind of people! (Bette is usually NOT my kind of people, she is sooo controlling, but I loved her in that moment. Also, great blouse!)
Also Maribel telling Sophie, “you lose yourself in her” uhhh they were together like 2 seconds, and Sophie basically did nothing for Finley’s drinking (not that she had to, since Finley’s drinking didn’t really affect anyone else). I was like uh that’s kinda rewriting history
Nothing brings me more joy than L Word recaps returning.
Last season left me SO down on this little show that’s fun to hate watch, and watch watch, because S2 was 98% hate watching and then waiting for Gigi to eye f*ck someone. But I must say, I was pleasantly delighted by this first ep. It was funny, there were solid lines, great pacing and comedic timing were on display in a few of the ensemble scenes. Everyone seemed to be behaving somewhat rationally and in alignment with the general concept of time. Still wish they had used the year jump to get us a little further out from Finley’s fresh-out-of-rehab sobriety. It’s still a little painful that they’re going down this amends route which is not accurate and feels so cheap and boring as a tool. Would rather see some complexity around drinking/sobriety that feels in line with modern culture vs. drunk dad in 1983. BUT, I’m willing to let all of that go if they keep up the good work elsewhere. Maybe they’ll let Finley win for once, instead of being shit on by everyone around her for literally doing nothing other than being a little goofy.
My only on-going complaint is Tess and how pointless that character feels. I genuinely find it so uncomfy when her and Shane touch in anyway. The chemistry is sooo absent. And the acting. It would behove the show to cut her loose.
There was literally a scene in season 2, the one while Sophie and Finley are walking to the car before the DUI, where Sophie communicates that she does NOT lose herself in Finley the way she lost herself in Dani, loses herself in work, etc. 😵💫😵💫😵💫
Yes this!!! I was like no maribel Finley is the one person Sophie doesn’t lose herself in!! Are we supposed to just pretend we don’t remember that being the whole foundation of their relationship?
Obviously the show wants us to side with maribel, but I was agreeing with Sophie in that whole convo lmao
As an absolutely obsessive sinley shipper I have watched all their scenes a bajillion times and will not allow this weird rewriting of history and storylines cloud what I know to be true about them !
Also I prob need to get out more 🤷🏻♀️
yes i agree with many of these points! very little about finley’s sobriety journey makes total sense to me although i am trying to let go and let Go-, particularly the sense that she can just return to her previous life without any changes needing to be made. like for example going to a Party at a Bar on her first night back (and Sophie drinking at the party!)… feels like a missed opportunity to talk about what spaces Finley feels comfortable in. And I’m surprised Sophie hasn’t done any soul-searching of her own as well, in my personal experience, when your parter gets sober and you used to get drunk together all the time, it does lead to some inventory-ing and self-reflection.
finley did have sex sober with sophie a few times! but she probably feels more vulnerable in general now. i’m not sure where they’re going with that just yet. but i feel like there’s definitely a lot of shame there because of how she grew up.
anyhow i still hope these two crazy kids can make it work and eventually have a sex scene
I was thinking about that a lot, with the sober sex stuff. I was wondering if maybe the sober sex she did have with Sophie while in a relationship with her might’ve felt incidental, since she was drinking in general so she wasn’t her full raw self. And the first time with Sophie ended up being so complicated for other reasons? But maybe I’m just giving more thought to this than the writers!
I too hope they can find their way to a sex scene with each other, both because I love watching them have sex, but also that would be so moving and beautiful!
Finley’s sober sex with Sophie – yes, absolutely. I kind of meant except for that, but I didn’t make that clear at all. By the way, I always look forward to your recaps, Riese, they are so funny and include so so many details from the OG series I have no clue about any more! And you are an awesome and very talented writer. I am a big fan of your articles, they are always such a treat! Finally, I enjoy the space they provide for coming together as a community to chat about what people loved, hated, and everything in between.
Regarding Finley’s underwear: A thousand times yes!!! Why would Finley wear that!!!
i was stuck on this too and also sophie’s grandpa pants. so distracting–is this really what the kids are wearing now?
The highlight of this episode was Sinley. The lowlight of this episode was, sadly, everything else.
Gigi looked good though!!!!!! I don’t trust the writers to do right by Gigi but I do trust Gigi to look good.
Gigi is so good at looking good!!
I really disliked this episode. Bums me out. Not sure I can watch this for another season. But Gigi does look good!
I’m only watching for Bette and Tina. Shane is going to Shane. I get it they are not everyone’s cup of tea but they are EndGame.
incidentally my crush on finley/jaqueline toboni was not hurt by that ernie and/or bert t-shirt they put her in, my heartstrings
honestly i would wear that t-shirt
shane’s whole foods bag walked so finley’s garbage bag suitcase could run
YES ASH YES
Was clearly purchased from the Jenny Schecter line of trash bag luggage!
Refined luggage for refined women of taste
These recaps are so fucking delightful! I have missed them so much!
thank you!!
This is eating at me so I just have to say… I’m pretty sure Bette took the Kiki Smith down at the end of S03E03, implying she actually decided to sell it in order to be Financially Independent While Soul Searching. I guess just like most of the characters’ siblings, they just conveniently decided to ignore it! Which is fine! I just had to put it out there because my own brain is gaslighting me into thinking I am the one Making Things Up!
Oh my god you’re right
Riese, I cannot begin to express my utter JOY that you are back and I cannot WAIT for the podcast to come (PLEASE co-host it!). This was hilarious and I love you very much.
I am indeed co-hosting the podcast this season! our first episode comes out on monday!
I am trying to give season 3 the benefit of the doubt that this first episode had a tricky task, with the stilted exposition (and ignored cliff-hangers from the finale) demanded by a year time-jump, not to mention the narrative corners the writers had backed themselves into in said mess of a finale… But I was underwhelmed (and the Bette and Tina stuff doesn’t even bother me – although my response was 100% Angie’s! which I adored).
Instead of pointing out the things that grated (eg. the writing of what we all watched in regards to the characterization of Finley and Sophie’s relationship; the very inconsistent way they are depicting rehab and sobriety; would Micah really have 0 idea that Maribel didn’t want to be married, and why was she so obsessed with Sophie’s wedding-that-wasn’t then? etc.) I am going to focus on what I did like:
1. I appreciated that Finley and Sophie’s reunion went slow, and held true to the awkward uncertainty of being back together with someone you’re very close with after you’ve been apart/your lives have been chugging along in separate contexts.
2. Gigi being Gigi
3. “I love our live and I want more of it” = purchasing another business to set up and manage? Sometimes I think Tess is a little unhinged? I’m glad at least she listens to To L and Back evidently!
Questions:
1. I really, really hope Gigi doesn’t get faded out.
2. Is the show really never, ever going to parlay the Finley sobriety storyline into a broader discussion about substance use and social dynamics within the group at large? If the season teaser is any indication, at least they can put Finley to work (with paid sick and vacation!) doing reno in the new property…
3. I too am with the commenter above who questioned the radical transformation in Finley’s underwear selection. Thought maybe she’d been getting slammed with those Woxer ads on Instagram too.
4. I hope we find out what happened with Alice and Tom and the seeming engagement ring? Or Dani’s stint in jail? Or actually, maybe I’m ok not knowing! Let’s just move right along.
also Riese: as an art historian by trade, I want to commend you on the pure artistry of the Old Bette / New Bette diptychs. Transcendent! (so glad to have your recaps back in our lives!)
Yes I definitely feel like this episode was hobbled by the absolute disaster that was the season two finale, so considering what they’d set themselves up for, I was pleasantly surprised that I enjoyed it so much and am still optimistic for the rest of the season.
I also noticed Finley’s underwear, which I think I talked about in the podcast episode that’ll come out on Monday. :-) I was like.. are all her clothes dirty??? HOPEFULLY THIS WILL BE ADDRESSED
“Is the show really never, ever going to parlay the Finley sobriety storyline into a broader discussion about substance use and social dynamics within the group at large?”
I definitely don’t think so! I think this is an especially frustrating elements of the show for me; like why is Tess, a sober person whose life was negatively impacted by alcohol, wanting to open another *bar* instead of maybe some other type of space for the community that isn’t centered around alcohol? (And not just her own personal shit but like; she’s definitely been a victim of other people’s bad alcohol-influenced decisions, like Shane hooking up with Lena.) I really like that they actually have sober characters, but I wish they’d grapple more with what it means for those characters to be surrounded by alcohol and other characters who seemingly do also drink every day? It’s weird that Sophie decided to take Finley to a bar on her first night back and also drink at that bar?
I was looking for photos a few weeks ago and realized that in the Season 2 promo picture, everybody is holding a drink! Which is such a weird choice for a show that isn’t literally about alcohol.
it’s not that I want Bette and Tina back together it’s that when they’re busy hurting each other it’s a little harder for them to pull in and hurt perfectly nice other people like Pippa/Carrie/the love of my life
right! i think obviously they are always going to come back to each other so it’s better for everyone if they just stick with each other and therefore there are less broken hearts on the side of the road
I can’t bring myself to watch the series because of the deluge of bad decisions but I love these recaps!
Oh wow, I laughed so so hard at this recap. It makes watching the show so much better. Thanks Riese!
I couldn’t believe Bette says she found her mother – aside from me (and it seems from the recap like this is real?) thinking that her mom was dead, that such a pivotal event would happen off-screen is such unearned character development. Absurd! Not that I would want to see that storyline play out or that the character development ever makes sense so oh well! Personally I am not minding Bette’s new personality at all – new personalities are an L Word tradition, after all!
In addition to the other people mentioned in relation to California University (I laughed so hard at the mention of “Core”), let it be noted that Tim was also once a swim coach there.
Tess’s “let’s buy another baby” line was a funny twist on the “let’s make a baby” line that was I think the second line of the pilot and is super common in lesbian baby storylines.
this is an important point about Tim I forgot about his illustrious career at Cal U!!!
Wait! Are we so desensitized to misogyny that we are ok with one of our favorite women beings sexually manhandled. Disgusting that the “L Word” still insist on straight sex in their episodes. Shame on you!!! I really cannot believe that lesbians are so desperate to have such a little piece of the pie that they will watch a man pound and degrade a woman to see a few lesbian scenes. Ilene Chaikin should ashamed.
Hey, hold up. A whole lot of assumptions getting made here!
a) Teddy is played by a non-binary actor who uses they/them pronouns and – just checked – the character is never referred to by any pronouns in the episode, so let’s perhaps follow the episode’s lead here instead and not assume he/him. (Riese, correct me if I missed something!)
b) Alice is bisexual, and bi people don’t stop being bi no matter who they’re with. The sex she has is queer by virtue of her having it. And showing the range of what queer sex looks like and how queer people live their lives is…the point of this show! This kind of visibility is really damn important – anything but disgusting (thank you).
c) There’s nothing inherently misogynistic about consensual rough sex and/or penetration – and to assume that it, or BDSM, or anything non-vanilla is degrading or un-feminist is deeply sex-negative.
signed, a kinky queer non-binary bisexual
(Side note: Riese, I love these recaps and reading them after watching each episode is my favorite part <3)
F the L Word has raised an excellent question.
But here to back everything that the fawn said. I think the scene was hilarious and was very on point for Alice who was once getting ****ed out of a sunroof. Yes I suppose that we could’ve more strongly addressed the slightly unsexy uber hetero pillow talk, but I think the point was Alice was kind of using Teddy- like into the sex, but not so into him and talk if clones, etc. I kind of hope there of deleted scenes of him saying things that are even more off the beaten path (and hope that its not offebsive to people whose kink is kind of being the joke here)
Now if only we can get some strap on scenes just like that one… and also Tasha back while I’m wishing…
yes to strap on scenes & getting Tasha back!! it is so unrealistic to me that there’s never been any scenes or mention of strap ons in the show.
I’m Bi and I personally don’t want that much straight sex in the L word. I come here for the ladies. At least give us as much full frontal last time opening episodes
Rough, unenjoyable sex is never fun. If Alice was enjoying it that would been one thing, but some dude throwing her around while he’s trying to figure it out is just gross and wrong. Alice (as a character) deserves way better. My issue, once again….as always in life, is the man’s pleasure over the woman’s. And it hurts even more that we have to watch it again in a “lesbian” show with straight sex. Over it!!
My friend, your feelings are valid, but – coming from someone who used to think similar thoughts when I was younger – I think you might be projecting stuff onto this scence that isn’t actually there.
I think Alice exploring her bisexuality on the show is important for the bi members of our community! The vast majority of bi women characters exist on shows framed around straight people. On this show that’s framed all around lesbians and other queer people, including a bi character like Alice and presenting her relationships with men as fully dimensional sends a powerful message to the many bi women IRL who feel unwelcome in lesbian spaces or uncertain about claiming a “valid” queer identity.
Many of the most ardent feminists I know enjoy rough sex or choose to take on a submissive role for their pleasure, that doesn’t make their sex any less feminist! I know there’s been a long history of TV and film sex scenes where men dominating women is depicted as the default dynamic, and those scenes have often been misogynistic, for sure. But in the context of a show like this that’s primarily written and directed by women and depicts a wide range of scenes where women explore sex on their own terms… it’s just one variation, ya know?
is it the 90s again?
degraded where?
Bisexuals have sex with people all up and down the gender spectrum, Karen. And though you’re too ideologically pure to go for that, sometimes it feels really nice to be pounded. Cry about it.
I’ve missed these recaps more than I’ve missed this messy little show, and I’ve missed this messy little show a hell of a lot.
Micah and Maribel’s lack of screentime last season has translated for me into an absolutely baffling dynamic. Cannot imagine dating someone for a calendar year and buying them a ring with scarcely a mention of the prospect of us marrying each other, but sure! Quoting Love and Basketball to someone is a soft proposal now.
I swear I’ll just start repressing the Finley + alcohol missteps that this show insists on making eventually out of both self-preservation and my deep desire to like Sophie in an uncomplicated way, but it’s wild that anyone thinks Finley’s sobriety is disconnected from the people around her.
I think Sophie’s “you’re still fun line” is meant to be a comfort to Finley, and to Sophie, and to signal that the relationship can survive Finley’s whole life changing shape, but it really made me wonder if Sophie is aware, deep down, that she thought sober Finley might not be fun for her. Has she considered that alcohol is like an egg in the soufflé of her own life, or are we to believe that Sophie’s figured out her own relationship to alcohol since Finley’s been away?
Also Finley ambushing Dani is bad and silly and Sophie slips so easily into just saying that Finley is cute and harmless while Dani is a bitch for not buying into what was annoying behavior, and I hope Dani goes to therapy and talks at length about how bad it feels that someone who bombarded her with pleas for honesty and transparency, then lied to and betrayed her, somehow believes she’s the villain in this dynamic for not fawning over the person who peed outside her apartment. Love to see see Finley treated as an adult someday. Love to hear 1 sentence about Dani starting therapy one day.
I’m glad Alice is out here having fun and getting railed, and actually it was very fun and funny to have a gen x-er spend time with a gen z semi-influencer or whatever and to come away with an appreciation for the experience instead of spinning it into the very tired space of older people emphasizing that youth is the last frontier before people start really learning things about the world.
Like, absolutely, Teddy is young and having a wild, youthful time, but it’s nice that Alice had enough respect for him to be direct and kind and to recognize that being in different places doesn’t mean being in a better place than him. Huge growth in the writer’s room since Bette’s mostly unchallenged and cruel dismissal of the hottest younger woman she’s ever spurned, one Gigi Ghorbani, who Bette treated like an imbecile off the street.
Speaking of Gigi… She’s so hot and she’s being so normal and I only miss ‘nail my ring to the front door’ Gigi a little bit.
Mina, I’m glad you mentioned Sophie’s line about “you’re still fun” because I did feel like that betrayed Sophie’s underlying feelings/fears and also suggest that she has done very little reflection in the past year about her relationship to alcohol or how Finley’s sobriety will likely necessarily alter their dynamic and life together, at least to some extent.
I feel like you really are growth on Finley’s part (not to say she doesn’t have a long way to go… ambushing Dani at work etc.) whereas Sophie, not so much.
I hope all three of them (S/F/D) are in therapy.
I hope they are in therapy, too, but I guess most TV drama wouldn’t happen if the characters were actually in good therapy and spent time reflecting, getting their shit together, unlearning old patterns and changing their (self-) destructive behaviors…
I often feel like Sophie gets a lot of unfair criticism, and I wondered if the show was going to address it by making her overly sympathetic or something, like I felt they did with Dani last season. But it seems like they’ve just doubled down, and made her hyper critical and cheating and behaving in other ways I feel like are baffling and also incongruous with how the character was originally introduced.
Or maybe it’s unintentional, and just a result of the writers not giving her character the care they’re giving other characters. Her line “you’re still fun,” I do think was meant to signal “Finley was concerned she wouldn’t be fun without alcohol, but here she is still fun!” But it doesn’t consider how Sophie specifically saying that is a tad dark, insinuating all of the things you said
I had a feeling people also weren’t going to like Sophie defending Finley in the whole Dani situation. I more so saw it as her comforting her girlfriend even when she’s in the wrong, as often happens in that situation, but I see your point as well
Dani needs to be in therapy, Sophie needs to be in Al Anon, Finley needs to keep doing what she’s doing, with some revisions to the amends process! Something tells me that may not happen!
Agreed on all counts, Em. I wasn’t very careful with my wording but my concern about the Sophie/Finley sobriety dynamic actually has less to do with Finley and more to do with the fact that it feels like a departure from the empathic, direct Sophie we met in season 1.
S1 Sophie was so patient and empathetic, and always made a real attempt to see where Dani and Finley were both coming from in their feelings, and her resentment for Dani felt…well not great for a long-term relationship to thrive under, but not at all unreasonable, given how Dani behaved in S1.
The cheating was a bad look, but the glimpses we were getting of the Sinley dynamic made it seem like Sophie was just being selfish in a way that she usually denied herself where Dani was concerned, and it felt easy to forgive since Dani was so checked out and hot and cold while Finley was steady and supportive.
But then there’s S2, and Sophie running to Ojai to comfort Dani while Finley dresses up to take her out, and there’s that weird ending where we have no clue if Sophie and Dani are done with each other, and then the rest of that season is Sophie and Dani trying to be civil to each other in passing while Sophie and Finley take turns doing wild stuff that hurts Dani (the karaoke declaration and Finley’s first forced apology tour), and Sophie keeps acting like none of it warrants an apology because Dani was an ice queen when they were together.
It’s immature and bitter in a way that S1 Sophie didn’t prime me to anticipate I guess. And when combined with Sophie not talking about what role alcohol plays in her own life/dynamics, and that wild new context added in S2 that Sophie doesn’t have much to say when her family is both transphobic to Micah’s face and infantilizes Maribel for her disability, it really changes how I think of Sophie.
I’ve seen stills of future episodes where it looks like Sophie is comforting Dani, so maybe there’s an apology for some of that stuff coming? But I should maybe stop giving the writers the benefit of the doubt; haha
100%, Mina. I’m curious (cautious…) to see where they take her this season.
“I swear I’ll just start repressing the Finley + alcohol missteps that this show insists on making eventually out of both self-preservation and my deep desire to like Sophie in an uncomplicated way, but it’s wild that anyone thinks Finley’s sobriety is disconnected from the people around her.”
Yes, this so hard!!
And agree that it was nice and refreshing that the gen x/gen z crossover was mutual appreciation rather than a “kids these days” eyeroll.
The Kiki Smith did make an appereance later: in last season of Gen Q, you can see it in the background in the second episode when Gigi is at her home.
Thank you for such a wonderful and funny recap once again, I have laughed so hard!
interesting! so i guess she just wrapped it up in season 3 and then like, put it back up….
Based on the promo for the second episode, I hope they don’t make Micah as trans masculine character into agreeing to getting pregnant in order to make Mirabel happy or to save their relationship. Granted, I have no idea what is going to happen, I just hope that Micah does not have to go through all the dysphoric elements of a pregnancy as a trans man just for more drama in this TV show. The L-Word did it with Max. And yes there are trans men who want to be pregnant and this is not what I am rallying against here at all! Just don’t portray it as a persuasion/pressure. Split couples up when one wants to become a parent and the other does not. Don’t make partners agreeing to something they don’t want when it comes to KIDS!
And also generally, I hope they give Micah a storyline that does not only focus on him being trans. In the previous season, Micah did not want to be reduced as the trans social worker/counsellor for trans kids**, but this is what the writers are doing with his character. Yes, being trans informs key elements of a person’s life, but there is more in a trans person’s life than about being trans! Who is Micah as a person? What are his characteristics? What is unique to his character? The majority of scenes with him seem to center around him being trans or bring his transness into play.
**This was also puzzling – so he wanted his cisgender co-workers who were not knowledgeable about transness to deal with trans youth? He was much better informed than Natalie etc.
And I remember Claudia, Micah’s other co-worker who also had knowledge about trans issues. However I was annoyed that both her and Micah made it about themselves when arguing about the teenage trans client. Micah and Claudia both used their own experiences as reference points, each doing what they wished someone had done to them in the past… Please show social workers who are actually good at their job and don’t make their clients’ lives about themselves!
I love this recap so much, it’s a huge dopamine hit, so very satisfying. The photo captions are hysterical and what can I say about the Before-After Bette collages that hasn’t already been said ? C’est magnifique.
And that brings me to the comments ! So interesting to read the different takes. I’m Team “I-only-read-the-recaps” so it’s a vicarious pleasure to see so much passion about these characters.
This episode cracked me up and gave me so much hope for this season! I am so excited to have the absolute chaos that is and always has been The L Word back in my life. These recaps are just as much a part of the show for me! If ever an episode is a little lacking at least I’ll still crack up at the recap and while reading about everyone’s love/hate relationship with this show! Am I the only one who feels like the fans/viewers of this show are some of the harshest critics? I love to make fun of this show but damn people love to hate it and find every little thing wrong. Obviously the show is far from perfect and could handle some things better but I’m blown away by how many people expect it to be so on point all the time. I don’t know any show that is. My biggest critique is that I already feel Micah/Maribels storyline is going to be boring, again. I want so badly to like both of the them but there really isn’t much to go off of and there are hardly ever any positive scenes with Maribel in them. Hopefully I’m wrong!
When Shane was eye fucking Ivy I thought the scene was more about Shane realizing how much she misses doing hair, especially with her digging through her hair products later. Maybe it was both? Is the new baby going to be a hair salon?
Regarding fan criticism: when I see much more successful writing — more coherent, nuanced, subtle, specific, still funny — on queer and/or queer-helmed shows like Vida, A League of Their Own, and Yellowjackets, it just makes me want this show (with which I so have so many history and care about these fictional characters!) to be better.
Yeah I hear that! I haven’t seen Vida or Yellowjackets but I thought A League of Their own was awesome. I’m realizing I must not hold this show to the same standards I do for other shows. The L Word’s writing to me has always seemed a little silly and that just always felt like a characteristic of the show. What you said makes a lot of sense to me though.
I hear you! I am aiming to channel 2022 Bette and make peace with a little bumper. :)
PS. I delayed watching Vida for a couple of years and it is SO GOOD. (If you like ALOTO, Roberta Colindrez has a great role in Vida seasons 2 & 3).
Yeah I think I could channel some 2022 Bette too hahah
Nice!! Yeah I’m not sure why I never started it so thanks for the nudge! Roberta Colindrez is great. I’m definitely going to check it out!
Yes, I saw that as Shane missing doing hair, but also curious about other women. If I had to guess, the building next door that Tess was thinking about becomes Shane’s Salon. Maybe Wax II or something.
i do think that we are hypercritical of this show for sure, moreso than any other show in human history, but also it’s hard for me to say because when i recap something i am like trying to analyze my feelings about every single scene and sometimes those feelings are negative, it’s been a minute since I’ve been able to just sit back and enjoy it.
I actually thought you were supremely generous in this recap and on the podcast!
A year of rehab is crazy expensive. Let’s have a real addiction storyarc that’s common- someone pays for you to get sober because they want you to be sober (you aren’t so sure) and then you relapse. The bitterness of that person who paid to “fix” you is profound
Am I the only person who adores Bette & Tina (drama and all!) and can’t stand Finley & Sophie (I find them so cringe I can’t even watch)?
A lot of ppl on the internet agree with you but I can’t say I’m one of them! I’ve long had my fill of Bette and Tina, and I love Sophie and Finley they’re basically the reason I watched the show
no i think this is the more popular opinion, i’m just personally on team sinley
I will never forget the oh so very sexy scene of Bette and a Very pregnant Tina. Still adore them.
the best part of the show is definitely these recaps. i am very ready for Shane and Ivy PLEASE.
I thought Tina’s look upon hearing Bette speaking with Pippa on the phone was less trying not to have an “emotional reaction to this call” and more of a determined Tina game face of, “oh game on, Pippa, she’s mine now.” No?
I would like to propose another name for Shane and Tess’s second entrepreneurial endeavor:
the “Mr. Piddles Memorial Cat Café”
@Riese: all the love for your recaps :)
ooo this is a strong contender…
I’m only still watching this show for Gigi and these recaps. The writing is so uneven. Bette’s ‘we’re all gonna die’ line was perfection, then Jordi and Angie’s breakup scene was one of the most perfunctory TV breakups I have ever seen. What a poor send off for that actress.
Yeah but if Bette reconnected with her mother could we see her possibly attending the wedding? And if so I’d be enchanted to know what actress people think might make an intresting grandma Porter? What do you thinks?
oh wow that would be really fantastic to have a guest bette porter senior at a wedding….
i thought her mom was dead? anyone else??
i guess im old because i can’t understand why finley is wearing granny panties? is this cool now?
Probably goes with the high waist jeans is my guess?
Old Bette, my parents are dead, I sold that artwork already (I swear we never ever saw it back up on her wall), silent retreats are repressive
New Bette, one of my parents is alive oops that little bit of emotional push-back was unnecessary, nope I never sold that artwork it lived in that house we fought about where Jenny killed herself, forever, silent retreats tell us all we need to know by day 2.
also, I kept yelling ‘noooo oh god nooooo’ through the Tina and Bette kissing stuff, so Angie was me at the end. you have got to be f’ing kidding is the perfect response to more tibette hahaha.
So what does Dani do now exactly? I feel like every 3 episodes she changes jobs. She’s gone from COO of shady drug company > Mayoral Campaign manager > CEO of shady drug company > Charity event runner (?) > art gallery show event person (?) > 100th Aloce Show producer (?). It’s like watching me as a Freshman/Sophomore in college trying to pick a major.
Bette driving a tesla in light of Elon’s right-wing political stances is going to be a problem.
Not sure how I feel about this show anymore.
well, it is unfortunately realistic, i feel like one-third of the cars on the streets in Los Angeles are Teslas despite it being a majority liberal city
I propose the Jenny Schecter Memorial Coffee Haus and Sad Writer’s Brasserie. We need a daytime location.
Once again, these recaps are better than the actual show. I know I’m in the minority but I’m just not a Tibette fan and had procrastinated watching this episode because of the spoilers. I agreed with Angie’s reaction.
Bette is all grown up and poor Shane is forced to regress, can’t they all be grown ups? I know, the drama has to come from somewhere. Speaking of though can we get a lot more Gigi and a lot less Finley? Dani and Gigi deserve to be happy and the worst part of them fast forwarding a year is we didn’t get to see enough of that. Now it appears they might be headed toward the end. I really hope not but that last scene between them didn’t lead to much optimism. I will keep watching because I guess I can’t turn away from this car wreck but I don’t have to love it. lol
They could go meta & name the new place they are looking at as The Planet Gen Q or something.
First thing. I assumed Angie was a senior in high school last year and that whole event was Senior prom. Either it was a Junior prom or she had a gap year before college since a year has passed since last season.
Second issue. The actress that plays Tess is a trans woman IRL. Why no mention of it in the show? Is Tess a trans woman or a cis woman? If Tess is cis, are we supposed to be upset that a cis actress is not playing her? I’ve found it odd that no one has ever mentioned Tess being trans on the show.
Tess is a cis woman. There are not many trans characters, so if trans actors could only play trans characters, they would barely work.
There are endless cis characters out there and so it is hardly shutting out a cis actor if a trans actor is cast in a cis part. The pushback has been about cis actors getting cast over trans actors for trans parts when there are hardly any trans parts at all. The other element of this is that a trans person has some very different experiences from cis people, so it’s harder for a cis person to play a trans character truthfully than for a trans actor to play a trans character truthfully, but since cis people and cis culture and cis experiences are majority dominant, we’re all soaked in it whether we’re cis or not, it’s not really difficult for a trans actor to play a cis character truthfully. They have eleventy billion examples to draw on, they don’t need to do research for the role.
Tess’s character is cis, Marja has confirmed that, I guess because that’s what Jamie Clayton wanted?
I don’t think anybody has a problem with a trans actor playing a cis role, I think it should happen more often than it does even!
In this case it’s disappointing because trans women are so often erased from queer women’s spaces and representation of queer women’s spaces in the media and it would’ve been really great to have a lesbian trans woman character in the show.
I have heard Jamie Clayton state in interviews that she prefers to work a myriad of roles, rather than her identity as a trans person being the central story line in every show. It makes sense to me that they would want to be recognized for their talent in a variety of plot arcs, and not exclusively a coming out story. However, we all know trans people are vastly underrepresented and that might be central to their identity, so. For my part I guess I just assumed Tess’s character is Trans, but I deffinetly acknowledge this is still an important conversation to have and perhaps a double standard, though. I really liked reading your thoughts, and thank you for taking the time to scan my novel if you got this far. :)
Watching Tibette interact is so stressful to watch. On the one hand it is cringe because of their past toxicity, and on the other hand I want to BELIEVE.
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Don’t have anything else to contribute to this thread, other than I am a queer blind person, and very much appreciate you including alternative text descriptions indicating what each screenshot is.