Dani’s marching in to her Dad’s office building to scream at him on a public stairwell, with Sophie trailing behind her telling her to maybe not don’t if perhaps no. Dad’s got his shirt unbuttoned to reveal a little chest hair. He says the lawyers told him that clause was standard.
Our children will be VEGAN, Daddy. VEGAN.
Now, Sophie’s getting in on the fight, asking if it’s standard for straight couples — but truly, you can’t yell at your partner’s Dad! Not yet, at least. Wait until he’s your father-in-law.
“There’s not going to be a pre-nup,” yells Dani. “Have I made myself clear?” She shoves the envelope back at him with the energy Shane employed to shove those tapes onto Mark’s chest and he yells at them to wait as they walk out. It’s gonna be a busy day at the office water cooler!
At Kit + Denny’s, Shane’s pouring herself a morning straight-up glass of scotch and is not sure if she can trust Tess to run this place ’cause she missed a liquor shipment this morning.
Lesbian Squabble #15: You’ve Messed With the Wrong Bitch, Bitch
In the Ring: Tess vs. Shane
Content: Tess is like, WELL SHANE I’m not sure if I can trust you because YOU FUCKED MY GIRLFRIEND. Shane acknowledges that this is fair. She does not mention that Lena TOLD HER THAT TESS AND HER WERE OVER but I guess at this point that really doesn’t matter and did Shane even believe her? And even if it was true, it’d still be SUPER FUCKED UP to hook up with your employee’s VERY RECENT EX who is also your employee. Okay there’s no way around this. Thanks for going on this journey with me.
Anyhow, Shane apologizes and hopes she can make it up to her some day. Tess says Finley’s gonna cover for Lena, who took off, which Shane says is a very bad idea and Tess will have to keep an eye on Finley. “Sure thing, boss!” Tess sarcastically shoots while keeping her eye on a bottle of alcohol.
Who Wins? Tess.
As Shane walks out of the room I got to thinking about how you grow up and you have so much more responsibility than you did when you were younger but if you don’t get locked into a long-term committed relationship by your early-to-mid thirties, often your behavior out there in the lawless world of singledom doesn’t mature as fast as your responsibility has. You’re not the worker anymore, you’re the owner. You’re not running an art gallery, you’re running for mayor. You don’t have a video show you call a “podcast” on a website that never actually works, you have a National/Regional Late Night Coffee Drinking Show. But sometimes your personal affairs are just as messy as ever (often because you spent the first 5-10 years of your dating life dating men and another 5 figuring out how to be queer). You’re still making the same mistakes — but now the consequences are so much more serious! And it’s not just your own shitty life you’ve ruined, now. It reverberates. Our real-life mistakes are rarely quite as egregious or dramatic as the ones we see on teevee shows like this one, but still. I got to thinking!
Cheers!
Over at Rebecca’s garden home, Finley’s super sorry for coming over drunk, but Rebecca’s not mad about that! She’s mad about what Finley said. But Finley doesn’t recall telling Rebecca that she’s not a real priest and that she’s in love with her. Upon learning that this is in fact what she said, Finley’s too overwhelmed by emotions and the implications of those statements to even consider ’em, and you can see her face contorting to avoid it — shame, crying, caring, any of it.
Don’t move I think there’s a bee RIGHT here about to sting you in the neck
Rebecca: “Oh sweet girl, you have so much you haven’t dealt with.”
Finley: “I wanna be better and you make me wanna be better.”
Rebecca: “I was with a guy once and I stayed with him for way too long because I was waiting for him to change. And he said stop trying to fix me. And he was right. You can’t fix people.”
Finley’s more curious about the guy part than the rest of it and Rebecca spots that evasion like a fucking HAWK. This is an EMOTIONALLY MATURE woman who has DEALT WITH HER SHIT who’s ready for marriage and babies and Finley wants that stuff too — she doesn’t know when, but, “just tell me what to do,” she pleads, trying not to cry. She wants words to say or an action to take. Rebecca wants a person just a little farther along in self-awareness. Finley takes some deep breaths, wheels her bike a little farther down the road, and makes the VERY bad decision to call her Dad.
So that’s a hard no on the Egg McMuffin, then?
In one minute her Dad manages to reveal that her sister’s been engaged for three months and that he’s kinda gotta go, but he loves her, bye. Aw, buddy. This isn’t gonna end well.
Sophie and Dani are driving along the fine interstate highways and biways of this GORGEOUS SUNNY city, and Sophie’s itching to discuss that intense situation in which Dani really impressed her, and Dani needs time to process. “Thank you so much for standing up to him like that, it meant a lot to me,” Sophie tells her. No response from Dani. LET’S GET READY TO RUMBLE!
Lesbian Squabble #16: There’s Not a Lot For You to Give if You’re Giving In
In the Ring: Dani vs. Sophie
Content: Dani just doesn’t wanna talk right now! Sophie says that was intense and amazing. “What are you feeling?” She asks Dani. Dani doesn’t know. It might help to talk about it! Dani doesn’t have anything to say. Well what are you feeling. Dani doesn’t know. You’re not thinking anything? Nope. It’s just quiet? Yep. What happens next time? There won’t be a next time! Yes there will! AHAHAHAHHAHAHHHHH.
“I know that he doesn’t think I’m good enough for you,” Sophie cries, like something that’s been building up for a long time.
Sophie suggests a strong united core to be resilient in the face of Daddy and also boundaries. DANI DOESN’T WANNA TALK RIGHT NOW she just needs to be alone to clear her head.
Who Wins? The sound of silence.
I’ve been pretty harsh on the directions of relationship-related arguments on this program, but what they did with Finley and Rebecca and what they’re doing here is resonant. How one deals with one’s emotions — whether that be avoiding them, needing time to process them, confronting and growing out of them, addressing them immediately — can often come right up against how one’s partner deals with theirs, and major conflicts can come out of that. Finley’s just not ready, psychologically, for what Rebecca is ready to give, and that can be a real reason to call things off! Meanwhile, Sophie’s an immediate processor and Dani’s an I-need-time girl. As Co-Star would say, they’re going to have to work to understand each other’s moods and emotions.
Cut to a little interstitial I had to eventually watch on mute ’cause hearing Tess go come on come on come on pick up pick up pick up over and over was like someone sticking a needle into my ear? I don’t know why! Is this ASMR.
I know that I can get McDonalds delivered on Uber Eats but Uber Eats doesn’t seem to recognize that y’all do All-Day Breakfast now and I can only order from the lunch menu! What I am looking for here is an EGG MCMUFFIN WITH NO MEAT AND A HASH BROWN.
Micah and Jose are doing SOMETHING MYSTERIOUS with their cell phones while chatting about oh hahahah of course Jose got into the art show! Look at his shirts! They’re all art. Jose, like a loon who has been dating Micah for more than five minutes is like, “do you love me?” and Micah’s like mmmm…. well, I’m not REALLY sure what we’re doing here, so I’m not in a great spot to fall madly in love!
So do you wanna do Literature: General again or should we switch to Queer as Folk trivia
Jose’s never been able to talk to anyone like this before. “It’s just so different with you,” he says, without being too extra about it. Micah smiles. “Well, I used to be a lesbian before, so.” Micah says he’s not actually good at sharing feelings but Jose’s like “look dude, you could be me, the guy who said ‘I love you’ this morning” LOL.
Let’s move on and get down to business: sexy business. There’s something Micah wants to try but he’s scared ’cause what if Jose likes it and he hates it???? By the way they are NOT talking about knife play.
Queer Sexy Moment #13: Afternoon Delight
The Players: Micah and Jose
The Pick-Up: “So what do you want to do?”
Hot or Not? Yes! It’s like everybody is communicating – verbally and otherwise — Jose’s hands down the front of Micah’s pants and then slowly but surely Jose is on top of Micah and we are going for it! Everybody seems to be having a nice time! Hot.
Over at Kit + Denny’s, Tess is dancing casually between the tables like she’s working at The Max.
Dancing is an activity that a Sim can do alone or with a partner. Dancing is also a secret skill in The Sims 2 and The Sims 3 and a new skill in The Sims 4: Get Together.
Finley strolls in sad, sunshine streams in behind her thus inspiring me to realize that this lesbian bar is PACKED in the mid-afternoon. Finley reveals to Tess that although she promised to fill in, she can’t mix drinks. All she can pour is shots. So can Tess! For … herself?
I know you can pour a lot of liquor into your mouth from a glass but how quickly can you swallow the actual glass
WATCH ME
Finley’s not so sure that it’s okay for Tess to drink? Tess says “now it is” and five seconds later, Finley and Tess are dancing behind the bar, which’d be cute as hell (they’re so cute dancing together!) if it didn’t come in the same package as Tess breaking her sobriety.
Cut to a beautiful scenic overlook, where Bette has arrived to break Felicity’s heart just after Felicity tells her she got her own apartment and Bette can come over now for some fresh-cooked meals straight from Felicity’s sweet lil heart!
Lesbian Squabble #16: I Lie To Me Too
In the Ring: Bette vs. Felicity
Content: This has to end, says Bette. She lied to Angie, they promised to end this for the campaign! Felicity blew up her whole life for Bette! Oh please, says Bette, her marriage already sucked. Way harsh, Bette! “How can you possibly say that you love me when you’re willing to put me at risk?” Bette asks, as if this whole thing didn’t put them both at risk and people who love each other don’t put each other at risk all the time! Felicity wants Bette to fight for them. Bette’s not gonna do that. Felicity doesn’t know what she should do now. “I don’t know, but I do know that you will get through this,” says Bette. Uhhh…. yikes? Um, that was …. a VERY brief lesbian breakup?
Who Wins? Dani.
It’s time for NEW THROUPLE RULES!!! Like one: don’t pick up Gigi’s phone, if it’s her Mom Alice should leave it alone.
Okay, never have I ever had sex with a vampire
Other topics covered include: swim meets (Alice hates em), red carpet events (should we attend together and wear our gowns and get ready in the bathroom like gal pals? Let’s table it, says Alice) and are we gonna tell the kids? (Gigi says yes. Nat says no. Gigi’s done lying. Nat is like, “Oh interesting, now that’s a convenient time to give that up, your favorite hobby.” !!!!) Alice says it’s just a game. Is it? What’s happening.
Come on, do you really think it’s necessary for BOTH of us to put on those baseball skirts they wore in “A League of Their Own” just so Gigi can boss us around?
Oh I think it’s pretty necessary
There’s no crying in baseball sex, Nat
OK FINE
They decide to all just hang out and see what happens, starting with ordering some Thai Food. I am FASCINATED to see how this relationship evolves. There might be some major benefits to this relationship for these three very busy and very attractive women. Love this thruple visibility.
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The soft look in Gigi’s eyes in the kitchen scene…I’d give her whatever she wanted.
Me too! Her eyes are hypnotic but also sensual and sad and coaxing…if all those things are possible at once.
Me three !!!
I love everything about Nat, Gigi, and Alice.
Someone commented previously that Dani and Sophie have a different fight every episode and nothing ever gets resolved or brought up again and it’s so true. I’m also very pro pre-nup (you’re signing one no matter what – it’s called the divorce laws of your state – so why not make your own!) and I love that Maribel is an immigration attorney!
Not loving my American Girl doll this week. Her phone background was her husband like a week ago! What happened?
i know when she was like “we are not doing a pre-nup, do you understand?” i was like GIRL DO A PRE NUP!!!
okay so this is my generous theory about our American Girl doll which involves a lot of projection from my own past — her husband is a terrifying jackass and she kept that as her phone background because she was afraid of what he’d do/say if he saw that she’d changed it? She wanted to wait til she was out of the house to change it? I have a feeling that we’re never going to see her again though… :-/
Ohhh fair! It makes sense that she didn’t make the decision to leave him until after he found out about the affair and then had to tread carefully. IMDB says she’s in five episodes so I think this is it?
I’m getting the vibes that she is going to come back in a bad way. She had Bette’s phone for a few hours at least right? I think she’s going to go the “woman scorned” route and either try to blackmail Bette or ruin the campaign. Possibly with something taken off Bette’s phone. Not basing this on anything she has shown personality-wise, but more because of it being a show. I really hope not though!
I have so many thoughts about this episode!
Dani and Sophie, my babies. When they were arguing in the car I definitely saw myself in Sophie- just wanting to get it all out there and process it. Meanwhile my gf is Dani, with a strong need to process everything alone. The difference, though, is that we actually *talk* things out eventually because communication. I really want them to resolve things! Are any of the writers advocating for what would actually happen in a LTR?
I have so many nopes about Dani’s dad. I think a pre-nup is fine but he shouldn’t be the one sending it obviously. He had to know his “daughter he raised” was going to tell him to fuck off once they got it too. Dani’s so no nonsense (and honestly it’s really hot) and you had a hand in shaping her personality so why the surprise at her reaction? It’s even more fucked up to exclude your grandchildren from inheriting money when your daughter is going to be raising them too? Nope, nope, nope. (Honestly why was Sophie going to sign that thing without reading it anyway?)
I want Bette and Felicity to be together so bad. They seem good for each other. Her ex-husband was way out of line at the end there. Seems like they were trying to show that he might have abusive tendencies? Felicity deserves better. I’m seeing less people ship Bette and Dani after that mother figure like scene because of course that’s what their relationship is. They have no sexual chemistry. If the writers do go in that direction it will be forced as hell. I would like to say I would stop watching, but that’s a lie.
I don’t understand why they can’t be together now that Felicity’s divorced? Every one already knows about the affair! How would change the election results if they were actually in a legitimate relationship during the campaign?
I agree I think they were showing that her ex husband has abusive issues. Which is kinda what I suspected all along tbh.
I will say that I doubt they are officially divorced yet so it’s still tricky — I dated someone once who’d left his marriage but it hadn’t been legally dissolved yet, and we had to keep it on the DL or else it could be bad for divorce proceedings?
Hm I didn’t think about that. That makes sense then why it would still need to be on the DL.
Have any of the writers been in an LTR?? It’s always been very obvious for me very quickly when a girlfriend and I communicate differently. I can’t imagine being at the marriage stage (or making it longer than like six months) without having some strategy for how to deal with that. Especially when you’ve moved in together! Things come up!
Riese…I laughed for a solid 30 seconds at that pic of Quiara followed by “Ahhh no pretty sure that’s my butthole”. Thank you for that!
Quiara is still very pretty and I still think she probably smells like the freshly laundered sheets of angels but this episode made me weak for Gigi. She is so effin’ sexy to me, especially during that kitchen scene. A friend (who I facetime the show with) pointed out that it was her eyes and Gee-sus, yes, it is her eyes! Muy muy caliente or however you say it in Farsi.
Bette is col’ (the abbreviation represents the coldest of colds…Yeti vagina cold) when it comes to dumping women but she is the absolute best mom and I love her relationship with Angie. Alice and Shane are the best aunties too.
Dani and Sophie…oh Dani and Sophie…they do process things so differently but I think for Sophie it’s more than a process, it’s also a very dangerous coping mechanism. That vessel she’s stuffing that pain into is gonna blow any moment. Let’s hope Candace doesn’t have any younger sisters or 20 something nieces who also happen to be carpenters.
You’re so welcome!
Gigi has been my #1 since she first walked into our lives in her blazer in the first episode! I love her everything. Even her voice is hot!
I think I disregarded her initially because I thought she was cold and a little crazy. You are so right about her voice and the blazers which I was reintroduced to when I went back to watch some of her scenes in previous episodes…ehem for science. Also, have you noticed that half-smile thing she does?
yes I have, that half smile is so sexy !!!!
It looks like they already are putting a end to the thouple thing judging from the looks of the scene in next week show were gigi is leaving the house and they were really nice seeing the 3 of them together.
I feel so happy (and a bit called out) that Rebecca realized what was up with Finley and ended things rather than wasting more of her time and emotional labor hoping Finley would change / trying to help her change. Is it just me or is it rare to see TV characters make responsible, years-of-therapy-informed decisions like this? Maybe I’ve just been tormented by The Fosters, Good Trouble, Freeform shows as a whole, and my own experiences? Maybe making good decisions in romance is less rare than I think? It’s refreshing to see either way.
Rebecca has an amazing therapist. She made so many hard and right choices right there
Rebecca’s therapist is the MVP of the episode
@cxfergus & @carmensandiego – I agree she must have an amazing therapist and I disagree that the therapist is the MVP. *I* have an amazing therapist and that doesn’t ensure I actually do my boundaries and make hard and right choices haha. To me Rebecca is the MVP for putting her therapy learnings into practice!!
Man, seeing a responsible, mature person like Rebecca who has their shit together made me realize that’s a real turn on for me. I know that her way to get there probably wasn’t easy but GIRL! YOU GO! ALL THAT WORK ON YOURSELF IS WORTH IT!
Also real talk: that scene was so good, it made ME want to work on shit. And I thought I had my stuff under control.
Strong agree, @starry-eyed ! ! ! People who are responsible & mature & have their shit together are such a relief, honestly.
Sophie and Finley in the preview for next week 😦🤢
Also saw that and after all this talk of Dani and Bette – which should never happen, fight me – I began thinking about who out of Dani and Sophie could handle being cheated on better. I don’t think Dani could handle being cheated on by Sophie at all, because I think beneath this tough exterior lies a very vunerable, soft core.
i agree i don’t think dani could handle it. i feel like sophie is more comfortable with grey areas and nuance than dani is.
i can totally see the sophie/finley thing happening…. i mean at first i was like, well if they were gonna hook up, they’ve been friends for a while so wouldn’t it have already happened by now? but then i looked back at my own life and the lives of my friends and realized… nah. totally still possible. that friendly sexual tension can simmer for years!
Until this week, I was torn on if Dani wanted to be Bette or do her – firmly in the camp for the former after this week!
Previews are so misleading though. They’re probably just dancing together in a flashback or something.
i love big little lies!!!!
You win a comment award in my heart
Big Little Lies and Fleabag but make it The L World.
Finely’s journey continues to steal my heart away. Jacqueline Toboni does a fantastic job relaying a multitude of emotions across her face in an instant just before the character hides/shoves them away with her Finely-ness.
With the phone call with her Dad, I got the feeling her Dad had to quickly hang up the phone because her Mom was coming. Like as in, Oh hey Honey, oh bye honey, Can’t get busted talking to the likes of you, so I’m just going hang up quickly and pretend it was the wrong number. Otherwise, why would he need to hang up with Mom coming over to him? Which if so, harsh.
At the beginning of the episode, I was like Oh Cool, a Tess and Finely team up. That’ll be fun and Tess can help Finely work out some stuff, like maybe her possible drinking issues. Then as the episode continued I was like, Oh Wait. NO. Nope, this isn’t going to end well for Tess. But that dance session behind the bar was cute tho.
I feel like Gigi and Alice are much better at co-parenting and showing relationship like qualities than Alice and Nat. Alice seems to learn very basic facts about her 2-year girlfriend in every episode, while Alice has already bonded with Gigi over sick kids, book reports, and apparently knows Gigi’s favorite Thai food plates over what her girlfriend likes.
When Quiara told Shane she didn’t need her, she just wanted her. I was like Ouch… but apparently that wasn’t a dis and meant to smooth over Shane’s concerns?
That last scene. Ugh.
Gigi and Quiara… hot
dream team
sophie: please dani talk to me
dani: *no thoughts, head empty*
bette porter:
dani: ok omg so my fucking dad ………
-honestly the only highlight of this episode was dani angrily strutting away from her dad grunting “lets go” or “come on” while sophie was behind her trying to catch up with her
– i feel for sophie now bc clearly she’s not just snapping for no reason(thats what i thought at first) & that its the accumulation of dani being constantly emotionally unavailable & non-communicative that’s driving her crazy & causes her to snap
But still, imagine if your fiancée who has a huge fear of daddy abandonment stands up to her dad in a dramatic way & then is visibly distressed & is silently processing wtf that means for her relationship with her dad aka her last living relative (i think???) AND it takes 10 minutes for you to want to pull out a knife & try to get that juicy sad info out of her THE HARD WAY.
Anyways both of them are messy, this relationship is messy…can’t wait for them to get it together soon or speed up dani’s affair with bette…we are tired
-im so happy you’re referring to the bar as Kit + Dennys, the disrespect to kit jumped out when they named it Dana’s ( & to jenny i guess….)
– QUIARA!!! + im interested to see where this conversation, about if 2 people who love each other can continue to be together if one doesn’t want to have kids & the other does, can go (god just typing this sentence made me lose 6 out of my 10 remaining braincells)
– im so confused about felicity??? is she still with her husband??? thats the impression i got from last week since she had his ugly bland face on her lockscreen??? idk i dont understand what the hell is going on
also does this man have a job???
Laughed a lot at “dani: ok omg so my fucking dad ………” So true!
I think Sophie is more likely to have the affair! She’s feeling neglected in the relationship and keeps trying and failing to connect to Dani. I realllly hope it doesn’t happen, but… yeah.
I don’t see Dani and Bette together at all. They’re too alike and I just want Bette to be mommy (not mommi) to Dani. Also want Bette to adopt Jordi, but that might make it weird for poor Angie.
i’ll miss my HS crush, olivia thirlby lmao
anyway, this show is causing me to have many existential crises
The last episode had a considerable drop in the ratings. how are we doing with regards to a renewal? Any news on season two?
ratings for live viewings or does it include on-demand as well? maybe more people are watching it on-demand now
the drop may have also been bc of 30-day trials expiring
i feel like they’ve invested a lot in this show and if they don’t renew i will be UPSET
Hmmm don’t see anything about streaming numbers…
https://tvseriesfinale.com/tv-show/the-l-word-generation-q-season-one-ratings/
maybe that dip has something to do with the holidays? hopefully ratings for last night will be higher. your original question got me thinking, and a quick google shows:
IMDb 6.8/10 – 980 votes
Rotten Tomatoes 81% – 21 critic reviews / 78% – average audience score
Google users 94% liked this TV show
hopefully those metrics are also factors in showtimes decision process. though imdb could be better…
Sorry, but I’m having a real hard time understanding why Dani owes it to Sophie or anyone to process her emotions further WHILE DRIVING. Do people recognize how hard driving is with stress and anxiety as is? Do we know her nerves aren’t shot? Or maybe she has a pounding migraine from the intense feels surging through her head. I don’t think it is fair for Sophie to demand a processing sesh while behind the wheel on something that literally just happened. Let her drive. Talk when you get home. That whole scene was so wack to me and didn’t feel..idk..genuine even?
100%. I was stressing out the whole time with that scene because I was convinced they were going to get in a car accident. Like, damn, Sophie, maybe wait until you get home to gently prod if your fiancée is clearly uncomfortable processing very difficult feelings while driving???
Devil’s advocate? For a few episodes now, Dani has been shutting Sophie out by sequestering herself and refusing to talk about what she’s thinking or feeling. Dani’s explosion at her dad was the first emotional anger/pain that Sophie had seen from Dani in a while and maybe she wanted to piggyback off that hoping to keep that momentum of Dani expressing herself but when it stalled, she got frustrated and pushed. Not saying Sophie was right but I think emotions were running high for both of them.
Yeah as someone who can take days to process emotions and needs to feel 100% safe sharing them when ready to do so – this scene have me SO MUCH anxiety. Like, I get that Dani has been withholding, but honestly Sophie’s browbeating technique would close a lot of people off. And can get that girl be a little bit more compensatory to her fiancee and try to understand that it’s sometimes not feasible to cut off your only living parent?
really dislike that sponsor..I guess AA works for some people but..damn
Empty platitudes for 30 seconds doesn’t seem to be the responsible way to address someone struggling with their sobriety. Super unhappy and distressed with Tess unravelling this episode.
as someone who has worked on many political campaigns, the idea that they are doing cold calls by manually typing numbers with no script and no data collection is INSANE and would never happen. bette seriously needs a better gotv strategy
ThankYOUUU!! Loll 🤣 Shane and Alice just casually lounging/sitting/slouching in Bette’s office chairs, scriptless.
Rebecca’s self-actualization is the absolute hottest thing on this whole show
Alice, Gigi and Nat: *have group sex*
Me: Ok
Rebecca to Finley, kindly: “You need to get your shit together”
Me: *Bites knuckles*
lololol
lolol. I agree! A much younger me would have been so into Finley’s mess. A much older me is like *I will get my shit together for you Olivia Thrilby and we will make babies because your healthy self respect is smoking hot*
ISN’T IT THO
Strong agree with this whole thread ! ! !
I seem to have a radically opposing opinion on the stories in the show, which surprises me.
1) I find Finley unbearably obnoxious. I can appreciate the complexity of the estranged family/religious upbringing, but I find it difficult to care about someone who refers to sex as “fudging”, and is the most annoying housemate (assumes too much, doesn’t respect Shane’s privacy, can’tread social cues). I’d rather have Rebecca as a regular character than Finley, because it’d be nice to have a grounded self-aware character with faith instead of an immature stumbling mess of a person in constant “party-mode” dealing poorly with unresolved trauma. Everyone else in this show is making terrible decision! Let’s have a queer woman who has her shit together, please!
2) I’m foaming at the mouth with exasperation that nobody is talking about the fact that Felicity is still married!! That’s why this is a scandal!!! Because Bette who is a politician now is having an affair with a married woman!!!!!! And if Felicity isn’t married then why the hell does she have her husband on her lockscreen photo? They need to make it clear for the audience the state of Felicity’s marriage instead of avoiding it except when he shows up angry and abusive.
3) The throuple idea is the fucking worst and I couldn’t even enjoy the well-choreographed sex scene because I was cringing so hard with all of their decisions. Don’t enter a poly relationship with all 3 people having different ideas of what that entails! Don’t enter a poly relationship with your ex wife when you still carry a lot of raw and intense anger over her betrayal! If you can’t trust your partner, don’t enter a poly relationship with them!!
And Alice seems to be the wrong match for Nat. She’s been with her for 2 years but openly brags about the fact that she has no relationship with the kids she lives with and recoils at the idea of being included in their family publicly?? Her behaviour would make sense in the beginning of the relationship, not 2 years in and living with kids! (That would actually be interesting to see Alice adjust to the new reality of dating someone with kids but honey, this ain’t it) I anticipate Alice and Gigi are going to run off together and I can’t wait to see sweet Steph Allyne burn LA to the ground in vengeance.
4) Sophie and Dani have terrible communication. Sophie comes across as too intense and demanding because we the audience don’t know their history. This is where exposition is really important!! (This applies to Alice and Nat, too) Just because the audience is learning these things for the first time DOES NOT mean that this should be news for the characters as well. Horrible horrible writing on this front.
Also, Sophie demanding that Dani process her feelings while driving when Dani made it clear that she wasn’t ready to made me super anxious because I thought for sure a car accident was going to happen, plus bulldozing over Dani’s clear boundaries was super uncool. If they’ve had problems communicating and with Dani bottling up, Sophie needs better coping mechanisms too. Couples counseling! Better established rules on when and how to process in a way that both are respected! And for the love of God, writers, give the audience resolution to all these new and unfinished arguments!!
Also, the idea that Alice can be out publicly as part of a poly relationship is laughably naive. If her talk show is at risk for cancellation by discussing feminism, there is absolutely no way that America would accept a poly lesbian talk show. I wish their conversation was taken more seriously instead of ending on a glib “ehh we’ll figure it out, let’s just hang out!” There are kids involved, do you know how unstable that is for them to constantly question the state of their parents’ relationship?? Uggghhhhh I hate that storyline so much.
Also!! Why is Micah on the show? He’s boring and doesn’t have any depth. And he’s a man who has relationships with men! This is The Lesbian Word Show, so why do we have a man sleeping with men but no bisexual women or trans women who date women??? If Micah were dating women then I can see why they’d explore that tricky question of where men who formerly identified with the lesbian community fit in while still dating members of that Sapphic community, but he’s not so???? And if Tess isn’t trans, then where does that leave ACTUAL Sapphics who are trans being properly represented on this show??
The show can’t be making up for Max’s terrible storyline at the expense of continuing to exclude trans women, especially when they have the confusing audacity to have a trans actress use the phrase Girla Like Us between two cis characters.
Very much agree with the lack of lbq trans women. I will also add, it would be nice to see a nonbinary butch lesbian on the show, like Rhea Butcher.
Yes!! Also disappointed that there are no enbies on the show.
I’m totally agreeing about 2) and 3).
2) About Felicity’s Marriage: as I understand it (I never have been married) they’re apparently not as fast to get out of? I get it that the show has kept her status pretty ambiguous so far but I think that only makes it worse. They should at least made it clear that Felicity has separated from her husband. And about the lockscreen: Someone else wrote in a comment here that this might was because her husband showed abusive tendencies? I agree that this would be plausible.
3) Couldn’t agree more on that. The whole non-communication was a total turn-off. I can’t really add much about this, you put it absolutely perfect, except that I can totally understand Nat having trust issues about Gigi and I can’t believe the others blew her off like this.
About Finley: I agree she’s a mess and I agree that I rather would have Rebecca “I have my shit figured out” more on the show but somehow Finley grew on me? I also have not all of my issues with my parents and with my faith worked out and can kinda relate to her, even tho she is very self destructive and probably an alcoholic. But yeah, she’s so much a mess right now.
About Dani and Sophie: I was also very worried and anxious about the discussion WHILE FUCKING DRIVING ON THE HIGHWAY. And I understand Sophie’s frustrated about Dani’s processing but since this doesn’t seems to be the first time, she (or both, really) should’ve known better and be more understanding of each other! Dani should’ve realized by now that she needs time, so she should remind Sophie of this (but also, maybe give her a time-frame, like “I need some time, but can we talk about this at diner/tonight/in bed/some other fixed time?”), but also Dani should’ve not put Sophie down like this. And Sophie should not have pressured Dani so much about this.
I love Dani and Sophie, but man they should’ve known by now how to communicate with each other?
And that also frustrates me about Alice and Nat, by the way, especially since Nat is supposed to be a therapist and they’re supposed to be together since what, 2 years? I don’t like them as couple as much as Dani and Sophie but they. just. really. frustrate. me.
But enough moaning and complaining, all in all I am very pleased with the show, like in general it’s so much better than I’ve ever hoped and dared. There are issues but no show’s perfect and the reboot is (despite the issues) pretty close. I love all the diversity so far. I love how good a parent Bette is, I love the dynamic Angie has with all the grown-ups in the show. I love the friendship between Alice-Shane-Bette and Sophie-Finley. I love how Shane has grown as a character. I especially loved how she owned up to Tess.
yeah i agree about dani and sophie! i know that specific conflict was one that marja talked about putting in the show ’cause it was an issue in her own life. but i’ve been in relationships like that also and i feel like two years in, the whole thing would’ve been shut down by dani being like “hey, this is one of those things where i just need a minute to process, okay?” and sophie at that point would be like, “okay!” it would’ve been different if the vibe was more jokey, but it was DEAD SERIOUS, so i’m truly not sure how i’ve gotten this far.
and yeah as per starry-eyed, i was the one who mentioned her husband being abusive, which seems to me very possible based on how he went after angelica like that — not hesitating to hurt a child, even while drunk, is a bad sign, as is literally everything he’s done so far around this issue, including bringing this concern to a public event. what bette did is wrong, but two wrongs don’t make a right! i feel like felicity probably had to be very careful around how she handled taking steps away from him. but also, i’m not confident that the writers intended that interpretation, i guess we’ll see?
I love your comment, because everything I read is praise and I have to say that I feel deeply disappointed with this issue, I think that many people are just waiting to see how the appearance is resolved even if it is only short of Tina, because it is like a bad copy of the original (sorry if the translation is not very good)
What was with Finley’s Calvin Klein sports bra? I thought her underwear was exclusively sponsored by TomboyX
THANK YOU FOR MAKING THIS POINT
LMAO, “when they play hide the salami” sent me into space.
My real frustration here was this: can Dani not say “I need some time to sit with my feelings around this. Thank you for being there. I hope I can open up about this later, but as you know, it’s a LOT” when Sophie asks her to process IMMEDIATELY?
Like. There is a lot in relationships that are hard! But none of the things that are hard for these two need to be????
This episode was so good! I really like the idea of Nat/Alice/Gigi thruple. Finely is a mess and is definitely an alcoholic. She reminds me of a college student who is an alcholic but most of it is masked under a partying/letting loose vibe.
Also I didn’t know that Jamie wanted her character to be cis- awesome. I’m still hoping tho for a trans woman character in the future of the series.
Also I don’t know if it’s just me, but I feel like Micah’s character is falling behind everyone else. Like we haven’t really gotten to know him and he feels like an after thought sometimes? I know they have a large ensemble cast and it’s difficult to juggle that many characters, but I want to see more of him.
i was going to say these recaps are community service, but that could be interpreted elsewise, which may be the case for Riese, but i’m not sure she’s said so.
thank you for the public service to this particular community.
The most realistic part of this show so far is the generation of Finley’s iPhone.
Am I the only one who barfed a little at Rebecca’s speech?? I thought it was deeply condescending and gross. Like if you don’t want to be with someone that’s okay, you’re clearly at different places in your lives, but don’t psychoanalyze them on the way out the door when you’ve known them about 10 minutes.
Rebecca does *not* seem to have the ability to approach spiritual trauma in a way I would expect from a minister of some kind. As someone who regularly has conversations with my partner about our vastly different experiences with spiritual communities (her very positive, mine decidedly not) I would want so much more empathy from a partner. I think they are definitely in very different life stages which they eventually got to, but Rebecca telling Finley in an earlier episode that she needs to find her faith without knowing the context of her issues with it? Not cute.
As far as Alice’s triad, yikes at how little she seems to be attuned to Nat’s emotions? We got SO MANY close ups of Nat looking uncomfortable and Alice just seemed to steamroll over it? I get it, Gigi would make my brain a little fuzzy too but come on???
Does that mean Rebecca is out of the series? She was introduced in relation to Finley, who is obviously someone the series will keep following, while there are no other connections for Rebecca after breaking up. It’s a bit of a shame, because watching emotional maturity on TV would actually be refreshing. As a matter of fact, having the most emotionally mature person be a Christian (?) priest is quite a spicy element. It would certainly challenge not just Finley, but viewers. Religious upbringing can leave many different scars and to be confronted by a genuinely ok person who is also a believer/priest… Wow.
Someone else mentioned in the comments that Rebecca was being condescending. I agree the initial faith comments from previous episodes were presumptuous, but I wrote it off as the general heavy-handedness of the whole series. In this episode’s conversation, I understand Rebecca’s motivation fully. You don’t need to spend a lot of time with Finley to understand her happy-go-lucky attitude is a wall to protect herself, as well as prevent herself from confronting some things. One doesn’t defend so intensely otherwise. Rebecca wants a partner, not someone she would have to take care of. The rest of her life from what we saw seems quite level and serious and she seems like a no-nonsense person, while Finley has no understanding of how a formerly sober person drinking is something that definitely shouldn’t be encouraged or ignored, which is common sense stuff.
As for Rebecca’s role as a spiritual authority, it’s important to note that Rebecca’s relationship to Finley wasn’t priest-believer, but personal, so during the break up, she was speaking from that place, where she has the absolute right to say “I don’t want this, because I need to take care of myself”. I just wish this series didn’t have so many characters so we can actually get into all of that, instead of just having it superficially presented.
Which is the problem with Nat-Gigi-Alice, as well. Nat and Alice weren’t convincingly established as a couple before problems and Gigi were introduced. The threesome was amazing as a filmed and acted scene, the follow-up in this episode is understandable, I get what they’re trying to do (I think), but even when they gave Nat the most space they did so far, letting her express some fears and frustrations, it still isn’t enough and it seems as shallow that they’re just talking about it now, in this way. The “they’re drunk” device used to explain the threesome also feels heavy-handed, because we didn’t see drunk Nat, we saw Nat removed from her crumbs of personality so that a threesome could happen. And sure, all of the blanks could be filled in by the audience, just as I could conjure up an interesting backstory for Micah and explain why is Jose so random, but that’s not a sign of good storytelling. I did the “90% of the story I love is actually not in the show” thing and I don’t care for it.
I’ll continue watching because there’s no rule you should only watch good shows + I would be so happy if they actually let the polyamory happen. You, Me, Her is a horrible show and I really, really want to watch ok poly stories, if amazing isn’t available right now.
I don’t know too much about religious titles, but isn’t Rebecca actually NOT a priest?? I thought she was a minister or something. I picture priests wearing that collared outfit and taking a vow of celibacy etc. The times Finley called her one I thought it was hyperbole, but now that Rebecca got upset at being called “not a Real Priest™” I’m so confused.
The argument isn’t about semantics over titles, it’s about the fact that Finley doesn’t see Rebecca as a legitimate faith leader.
Having Jamie Clayton play a cis woman is something I’m still really struggling to parse how I feel about. As a sober gay trans woman, it selfishly feels almost… Unfair (?) to me that Tess isn’t trans. So close to seeing someone like me on screen, but like it’s not actually allowed?
I dunno, I’m so conflicted. From what I’ve read it was Jamie who suggested it, and I love the idea of having trans and non-binary folks playing cis roles, but in practice it’s just left the show feeling like it’s somehow not for me. Like trans men are allowed in queer women’s spaces and TV shows, but trans women aren’t. I’m probably overthinking it, but Tess’ whole storyline is just bumming me out because of that.
“Oh! I think that’s what I do” – Alice Pieszecki, the most put together of the OGs.
It’s funny, before the premiere I had really low expectations. Now, 5 episodes in, I expect way better writing? I just really wish the writers put character ahead of story/drama. I definitely still enjoy the mess that is unfolding, and the season overall.
I came here to say that the Tegan & Sara reference in Lesbian Squabble #16 made my day.