To quote Sufjan Stevens, “I love kissing. If I could kiss all day, I would. I can’t stop thinking about kissing. I like kissing more than sex because there’s no end to it. You can kiss forever. You can kiss yourself into oblivion.”
Here at Autostraddle, we respect the sex scene. We really, really do. But there’s just something about an on-screen make out. Last month, we celebrated making out IRL, but now it’s time to celebrate making out in movies.
Some of these scenes are hot, some of these scenes are sweet, and some of these scenes manage to achieve both. There are classic queer kisses, new favorites, and even some scenes I watched by googling “girls kissing” in the early days of YouTube long before I’d seen the films themselves.
Unlike our best lesbian movies of all time list which was created through an intricate process of ballots and voting, this list is entirely my opinion. It’s unlikely I forgot your fave, but you certainly can share what would be on your list. I’d love an excuse to revisit some scenes and do some more research.
20. Amandla Stenberg and Maria Bakalova in Bodies Bodies Bodies
Let’s begin with a beginning. While most on-screen make outs rely heavily on the build up, Halina Reijn’s comic thriller drops us in media res to tongues gliding against each other. It’s rare outside of a sex scene to get on-screen kissing this eager and realistic and hot. It’s a brief moment of sensuality and intimacy, a snapshot of what exists outside of the toxic nightmare of distrust these characters are about to enter.
19. Anaïs Demoustier and Valeria Bruni Tedeschi in Anaïs in Love
While this list does not include kissing during sex, it does include kissing that leads to sex. This one is for the age gap girls and anyone who doesn’t care about getting sand in crevices. Throughout the film, we’ve watched Anaïs dominate the men in her life, but faced with her crush — who also happens to be the wife of the man she’s having an affair with — she’s timid. Luckily, this older woman grabs her face with a sandy hand and initiates, allowing Anaïs to sink into the moment.
18. Sheila Munyiva and Samantha Mugatsia in Rafiki
Some of the make outs on this list are more about the circumstances than the kisses themselves. This moment in Rafiki with its two leads’ faces painted in neon is heavy with the possibility of a kiss, faces inching closer and closer. Finally, they get up and go somewhere more private, the tension still remaining. The kiss itself is brief but it holds the entirety of the moments before. That it then cuts to the characters hugging and laughing goes to show young love at its best is as much about finding a best friend as it is finding sexual awakening.
17. Madison Lawlor and Montana Manning in Daddy Issues
Some kisses are brief because of innocence and some kisses are brief because of torture. There’s something so real about this first kiss on the balcony at a house party between one girl who wants to be cool and her crush who is effortlessly cool. This is a kiss born out of inebriation, a kiss that can feel like the best thing in the world even if upon further reflection it only meant something to one of the people involved.
16. Hunter Schafer and Greta Férnandez in Cuckoo
I’ve only had about a dozen cigarettes in my life and I’d say ten of them were because I wanted to kiss someone. Sorry, but if a hot woman asks if you want to step outside for a smoke it’s very hard to say no even if you’re not a smoker! I didn’t love the movie Cuckoo, but I did love the representation of a hot woman asking if you smoke followed by an excellent make out against a tree cigarettes in hand.
15. Rachel McAdams and Rachel Weisz in Disobedience
Alas, the spit scene can’t be included, because it happens during sex and that’s the rule of this list. BUT before that incredible sex scene is an incredible make out. I love this moment because of the slow build, the plausible deniability that the women are embracing as friends until the line is crossed further and further. I also love this moment because both women are still dressed in full winter wear. The winter kiss is underrated! There’s something about all the layers of clothes between you and the hunger to get them off.
14. Adepero Oduye and Aasha Davis in Pariah
This list would not be complete without a sleepover first kiss. The tension of the night out with friends, the soft glow of the bedroom’s darkness, the giggling, the touching, the anxiety, the panic, the disbelief, the trust. This is a coming-of-age story, not a love story, but writer/director Dee Rees understands the importance of this moment being one of overwhelming joy. Alike isn’t just connecting with her crush, she’s connecting with herself.
13. Heather Graham and Bridget Moynahan in Gray Matters
Once again, reminding the folks at home that this list is a solo effort, so you cannot judge my picks. I will accept that Gray Matters is not a good movie, but this two minute clip is why I learned how to delete YouTube history from my family computer. Heather Graham drunkenly making out with her brother’s fiancée!!! Very overwhelming to me as a closeted teen!!!
12. Chloë Grace Moretz and Quinn Shephard in The Miseducation of Cameron Post (during Desert Hearts)
Despite having one of the most iconic lesbian kisses in movie history, Desert Hearts does not make this list. It’s not a make out! Yes, it’s raining and intense, but it’s too brief! However, Cameron Post and Coley Taylor kissing during Desert Hearts does make it. Whether a closeted teen or a seasoned queer, sometimes showing your friend a movie is a way to make a move. My favorite part of this moment isn’t even the kiss itself. It’s when Coley kicks Cameron and then just lets her foot stay there as they keep watching a model for what they’re about to do.
11. Sook-Yin Lee and Justin Vivian Bond in Shortbus
While a frequent anxiety of the sexually inexperienced is that they’ll do something wrong, I’ve found that someone being inexperienced but eager to experience can be really hot! I love this moment from Shortbus where the iconic Justin Vivian Bond fills the uniquely queer trans role of being both the Wise Gay Bestie and the First Lesbian Crush. Sofia is at her first sex party and unsure what she wants. There’s a real tenderness between her and Vivian indicative of the film as a whole. Yes, it has unsimulated sex, but it’s also really sweet!
10. Megan Fox and Amanda Seyfried in Jennifer’s Body
There have been many movies with homoerotic teen girl friendships over the years ready-made for projection and fanfic. But Jennifer’s Body makes subtext text. Not only does it have its toxic besties kiss. It teases a kiss. Then has them keep kissing with a close up of their mouths. Then has them keep kissing lying on the bed. It’s as if writer Diablo Cody and director Karyn Kusama wanted to make sure no one could misread this moment as anything but the manifestation of true desire between the girls. In fact, it doesn’t stop because one of them loses interest — Needy is just concerned about the whole killing boys thing.
9. Isabél Zuaa and Marjorie Estiano in Good Manners
This one is for all the sniffers, lickers, and biters. This one is for anyone who wants their on-screen make outs to include someone pregnant. This one is for anyone who has a thing for werewolves. Tension has been building between the chaotic Ana and her hired nanny Clara. But after a night out to herself when she gets another woman’s number, Clara comes home to find Ana rummaging through the fridge. In a trance-like state, Ana inhales her scent, licks her mouth, hungrily kisses her, and then bites Clara’s lip. When Clara pulls away, she sees Ana’s eyes glowing orange. Is Clara scared or horny? Why not both?
8. Kim Tae-ri and Kim Min-hee in The Handmaiden
In a film filled with power games, one of its most delicious is when Lady Hideko tells her handmaiden she’s anxious about marriage because she doesn’t even know how to kiss. Is this true? Or is it a move? Both? Either way it works. Handmaiden Sook-Hee sucks on a lollipop and then shares the sweetness between their lips. Pretty soon they’re making out with no sign of stopping. Educational!
7. Madeline Grey DeFreece and Rachel Sennott in Tahara
A very different “teach me to kiss” scene, this scene trades eroticism for the mortifying experience of being young. After enough goading, Carrie agrees to tell her cruel friend Hannah — who she is in love with, of course — whether or not Hannah is a good kisser. As their mouths meet, the 1:1 aspect ratio widens and the characters turn to clay. The camera spins around and around until the clay figures begin to meld into one another. This bold stylistic choice reveals the all-consuming unreality of adolescent longing.
6. Denise Richards and Neve Campbell in Wild Things
Another scene I watched over and over long before seeing the movie itself, this iconic pool fight turned make out is everything good about trashy 90s erotic thrillers. What does it do to a young person’s brain to watch one hot woman try to drown another hot woman before sucking her finger and then proceeding to make out topless? I’m not sure, but I turned out alright. (I have health insurance because I make lists of lesbian make outs after all.) The funny thing is that the broader context of this movie is even gayer than this scene led me to believe. No spoilers, but the end contextualizes this moment in a way that’s absolutely delicious.
5. Cécile de France and Izïa Higelin in Summertime
Finally, a film that combines sensual lesbian romance and feminist activism! I love the subversion of roles here. Even though Carole is older and has been the guide into this political sphere, it’s Delphine who instigates their sexual relationship. After a failed attempt late at night, they finally kiss — in an alleyway! in public! in the 70s! — after Carole insists she’s not a lesbian and Delphine reassures her that she isn’t either. Okay, ladies, whatever you say. That kissing looks pretty gay!
4. Camilla Damião and Ana Hilãrio in Mars One
While this film is predominantly about Eunice’s relationship to her family, I really appreciate the richness of her scenes with hot stranger eventual girlfriend Joana. Their first meeting is incredible club make out representation. The music is loud, allowing all of the communication to take place silently. Lesbians are known in media for talking, not for cruising, and this scene is the rare sequence where without dialogue we see a queer woman spot someone she’s into, gulp down liquid courage, make her way toward the woman, dance with her, and, finally, kiss her.
3. Anne Celestino and Thaís Schier in Alice Júnior
I cannot explain to you the joy I felt when this movie about a trans teenager trying to get her first kiss turned gay. The whole movie she’s talking about boys and even crushing on her new friend’s boyfriend. But then during her going away party the new friend kisses her and everything changes. I love that this movie allows for both self-confidence and self-discovery. Alice knows with full confidence who she is — and, at the same time, there’s still more to learn. This is a sweet, wholesome moment that still allows its young characters to have a really good kiss. After decades of movies where the twist is a character is trans, what a delight to instead have a twist where a trans character is into girls.
2. Sarah Michelle Gellar and Selma Blair in Cruel Intentions
“Only this time I’m going to stick my tongue in your mouth. And when I do that I want you to massage my tongue with yours.” The teaching-to-kiss scene that came with an instruction manual. Where to begin? The outfits? The string of spit? Sarah Michelle Gellar’s performance? This moment is ICONIC. In fact, it’s so iconic that we have already discussed it in detail.
1. Guinevere Turner and Cheryl Dunye in The Watermelon Woman
The point of this list was to highlight make outs rather than sex scenes. So how can I top this list with a make out that only lasts a few moments before it leads into a sex scene? Well, because nothing else deserves this spot, that’s why.
After their video store encounter, Diana has invited Cheryl over to her new place offering her wine, dinner, and friendly conversation. This sequence in particular begins with a clip from one of Dunye’s recreations of 1930s “race films” — Cheryl is talking excitedly about star Fae Richards and Diana looks bored. But then their eyes lock and Diana smirks. As Cheryl smokes and the two women talk about their mutual attraction, the film walks such a smart line between sexy and painful. Some moments are erotic and cringe! We get why Cheryl is drawn to Diana without the film hiding the limits of their relationship. When Diana reaches into Cheryl’s shirt pocket or when she flicks her tongue against her mouth or the way she holds both cigarettes in one hand, it’s enough to make you forget the rest. The casting of Guinevere Turner is another brilliant detail. Having co-written and starred in Go Fish two years prior, Turner is this icon of white lesbian culture seducing and repelling Cheryl.
The final beat of the sequence before the sex scene has the two women fall out of frame. Dunye holds on the TV screen allowing the rest of the scene within the scene to play out. The character played by Fae slaps the other woman for saying God chose her to pass. Look, this list has mostly been an excuse to get horny, but the very best of lesbian cinema doesn’t choose between horniness and depth.
The best lesbian movie make outs are more than just a kiss.
