The 21 Most Lesbianish Cities in the US: The Autostraddle Guide

11. San Diego, CA

Keywords: Film Out San Diego, FlawLes, Girlfest, SDGLN, Diversionary Theater, Kickball Tournament, San Diego Derby Dolls, The Lambda Archives

In California, domestic partnerships are legal and the state recognizes the status of couples who were married in states where same-sex marriage is legal. Adoption rights are LGBT-inclusive. Anti-discrimination laws include sexual orientation and gender identity. 

FlawLes San Diego 2011 Pride Pool Party

San Diego has a big military population and is known to be politically conservative than the other California spots on this list, but it’s still super gay. Gays have been taking over the Hillcrest neighborhood since the 1970s and San Diego’s got the nation’s second-oldest LGBT community center, The Film Out San Diego Festival and several of its own LGBT publications including SDGLN and the lesbian FlawLes Media Company.

Meet local like-minded ladies at the San Diego ‘Straddlers group.

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12. Madison, WI

In Wisconsin, domestic partnerships are legal but marriage and adoption rights are hetero-exclusive. Non-discrimination policies are sexual orientation, but not gender-identity, inclusive. 

Fruitfest 2010, photo by Lost Albtross: flickr.com/photos/emilymills/

Much like Ann Arbor (#14), Madison‘s uber-liberal University keeps things temperate for lesbians in its home swing state. I mean, there’s an entire neighborhood endearingly referred to by locals as “Dyke Heights.” Fruit Fest, an all-ages all-day block party featuring live music and local artists and performers as well as a a 5K run, will celebrate its third year this summer (read all about it on Indie Queer). The 5K raises money for a scholarship fund given to an LGBTQA activist in high school or college.

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13. Minneapolis/St.Paul, MN

In Minnesota, same-sex couples are denied any kind of relationship recognition. Employment non-discrimination laws include sexual orientation and gender identity.

women at lesbian club PI on its closing night, via citypages.com, photo by B FRESH

According to our University of Minnesota correspondent “the stereotypical Minneapolis queer lady has piercings and lots of bicycle gear” and rumor has it the best place to meet a lady is at a game of WNBA team Minnesota Lynx. Also you can find ladies at nearby Carleton College. Did you know Sick of Sarah is from here? NOW YOU DO.

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14. Philadelphia, PA

In Pennsylvania, there is no recognition for same-sex couples. Public employees are protected from gender identity and sexual orientation discrimination, private employees are not. (ETA: However Philadelphia has some of its own non-discrimination policies!)

Thanksgiving at Sisters Bar in Philadelphia

Philadelphia has been pursuing the LGBT travel dollar for several years now ’cause it’s just that great to be gay there and not just for boys — Sisters is Philly’s three-floor dedicated lesbian bar in the heart of the Gayborhood and lesbian couple Marcie Turney and Valerie Safran own and operate six successful businesses on 13th street. Only a hop, skip and a jump away at Bryn Mawr, girl-on-girl culture abounds.

Temple graduate and Autostraddle Teamster Laura notes that “it’s a small city, but it’s got a whole lot of queer per capita (caveat: Philly’s also more hip per capita than most cities so be prepared to play lots of games of “hipster or gay?”). You’re just as likely to run across a kindred spirit at First Fridays as you are at OutFest. If Temple’s where you end up and you just can’t handle another intensely sweaty underage night at Woody’s, I’m sure the Philadelphia Autoteam would be thrilled to show you around.”

Meet local like-minded ladies in the Philly Straddles Hard group.

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15. Ann Arbor, MI

In Michigan, same-sex marriage, civil unions and adoption by gay parents is prohibited. LGBTQ citizens are not protected from housing or employment discrimination, although state employees are protected from sexual orientation or gender-identity based discrimination.

Coming Out Day at the University of Michigan, photograph by Austen Hufford for The Michigan Daily

Fun fact: 70% of the town’s same-sex couples are female! Uber-liberal University of Michigan was described by our LGBT College Correspondent as “a mecca for LGBTQA-Z students.” Ann Arbor and the University leans dramatically left, so there’s a lot of independent businesses and political activism here, as well as a dedicated LGBT bar/restaurant The Aùt Bar, gay bookstore Common Language, gay nights at Necto, two art-house cinemas and one independent film festival. Nearby Inkster hosts lesbian bar Stilleto’s, and Detroit Suburb Royal Oak has lots for queers too.

Meet local like-minded ladies in the Michigan Lesbogays group. Riese, Autostraddle’s editor-in-chief, grew up here and graduated from the University of Michigan, as did AS Writer Whitney Pow.

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16. Atlanta, GA

In Georgia, there is no legal recognition for same-sex couples or LGBT-inclusive non-discrimination laws. Any adult may adopt.

Lesbian couple Jennifer & Rolanda via soyoureengayged.com, photography by mossandisaac.com

It’s the capital of the Homosexual South, but some report it’s much more gay-boy friendly than it is gay-girl friendly.  Regardless, Atlanta’s lesbian community is mega-diverse, My Sister’s Room is consistently recognized as being one of the best lesbian bars in the country and the famous Outwrite Bookstore still exists (well, kinda). Nearby Decatur is commonly known as “Dykecatur,” which sounds like a lesbian dinosaur.

Meet local like-minded ladies in the Auto-lanta group.

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17. Denver, CO

In Colorado, there is no recognition for same-sex couples. Employee non-discrimination policies are sexual orientation and gender identity inclusive. Any adult may adopt.

Denver Dykes on Bikes via “Colorado Sans” at flickr.com/photos/sandy_leidholdt/

Denver’s Gay & Lesbian Center kicks serious ass. And although that whole area of the country is often written off as being legally unfriendly to gays, that’s not so in Colorado — The Rights Five Campaign has the lowdown on Five Laws (including ENDA) that “enrich and protect the lives of LGBT people.”

Meet local like-minded ladies in the Denver Area Autostraddlers group.

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18. Houston, TX

In Texas, there is no legal recognition for same-sex couples or LGBTQ-inclusive employment non-discrimination policies. 

Houston Gendermyn Performance Group via facebook.com/pages/Gendermyn

Houston’s the largest city in the country with an openly gay mayor, the 12th most populated-with-gays US city and it’s also just one of the largest cities in the country, period. A string of unseemly governors have no powers against Houston’s thriving community and legendarily enormous Pride parade. Chances, one of the largest lesbian bars in the world, recently shut down; but there’s still drinks to be had at places like Blur, The Usual and F Bar and additional queer activities happening at the Houston LGBT Youth Center, The Houston GLBT Political Caucus and Houston’s LGBT film festival, QFest. Houston’s Rice University has a healthy queer community as well.

Meet local like-minded ladies in the TexasStraddle group.

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19. Ithaca, NY

In New York, same-sex marriage is legal and adoption rights are LGBT-inclusive. Anti-discrimination laws protect those on the basis of sexual orientation but do not include gender identity protections.

This tiny upstate New York town is best known for its two major universities, Ithaca and Cornell. It’s filled with hippies, good food, beautiful nature, wine and other stuff like that. Perhaps you wanna participate in a Lesbian Potluck or a Guerilla Queer Bar takeover. If you wanna travel there, here’s some special tips from our photoblogger.

Meet local like-minded ladies in the Straddling Upstate New York group.

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20. Miami/South Beach, FL

the 2011 Aqualicious Tea Dance via facebook.com/aquafoundation

Miami is home to one of the country’s most successful lesbian event-planning companies, Pandora Events (responsible for Orlando’s Girls in Wonderland and Las Vegas’s Shedonism, among others) as well as the awesome non-profit Aqua Foundation for Women. South Beach hosts lots of LGBT parties, including (obviously) Pride, The Women’s Winter Party and Aquagirl. Also, South Beach supports its own lesbian glossy, She Magazine.

Meet local like-minded ladies in the Straddlers in Paradise group.

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21. Columbus, OH

Chely Wright performs at Columbus Pride via facebook.com/columbuspride

OH-Hi-OH!?! Ohio Womyn’s Festival is apparently “Ohio’s best kept secret.” There’s heaps of activism going on in Columbus, through groups like Stonewall Columbus, Equality Ohio and TransOhio. Ohio State is a Big Ten School with a serious Greek System Situation, but it’s also queer-friendly with lots of different LGBTQA student groups.

Meet local like-minded ladies in the Ohio is for Autostraddlers group. Intern Grace lives here!

As we said in the beginning, we’re actively soliciting Queer Girl City Guides for any city in the world, including the ones on this list. So, if you wanna tell us how precisely your city rocks for queer women, here’s what to do: Email Laneia [at] Autostraddle dot com with a letter describing your connection to the city you wanna write about. She’ll let you know if it’s already been taken or not, at which point you’ll be responsible for crafting a comprehensive guide addressing things like the degree to which the LGBT scene is G vs. L, the environment for queer families, the college scene, local events/festivals, activist groups, nightlife, trans-friendliness, etc. You’ll also need to provide at least five of your own high-res photos (which you own the rights to), links to the places you talk about (and phone numbers/addresses when necessary), and whatever insidery details you’ve got.

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312 Comments

  1. So glad that Carleton College got a shout out in the Minneapolis description! I’m a Carleton senior and can definitely vouch for the awesomeness of our LGBTQA community here on campus.

  2. are there no statisticians in autostraddle?! maybe some member would like to volunteer.
    out of the top of my head i’d decide on a minimum number of inhabitants: one lesbian in a city of 2 people = 50%, not enough representation, but a city with 500 000 inhabitants might already be representative. then when you present you just have to say you analyzed cities with more than 500 000 inhabitants, or something like that. normally for small populations you can use a poison, but i’m not a statistician so i don’t want to talk about something i don’t know…..

      • Yep! It was fun to read…!! And the bottom line is: US have a lot of lesbians and its super fun there! xD i wanna goooooooooooo!!

    • I think using poison for a small population is a little bit harsh…just because there aren’t a lot of gays doesn’t mean the heteros have to die.

      You might use a Poisson distribution, though?

      • THE BEST! I’m at the library – just burst into a fit of laughter; everyone in the cubicles surrounding me gave me death glares.

      • lololololl yes sorry….

        ps. riese, i didn’t mean to sound serious, i guess i’m just a nerd and would find interesting to see how a study like that could be designed :)

      • I haven’t commented on anything before, but Marika, that is too good, I can’t not say anything. Pois(s)on. Hilarious.

  4. Whooooo Northampton!! I had no idea there were so many queer ladies in the area when I came to Hampshire but I am so, SO pleasantly surprised. It’s amazing here.

        • toronto and van could give us a run for our money, though. i believe toronto lesbians single-handedly brought neon back.

          • Vancouver at least used to have one of the best drag king scenes in the world, IMHO (not sure where it’s at now, though I can only assume the city is still very queer friendly).

        • But but Ive already adopted the anti-Toronto/anti-everythingnotQuebec-y rhetoric..for realsies though Toronto proper is pretty damn queer, if only the GTA were as well. I have a dream, that one day I will return for the holigays and there will be straddlin’ on the streets..autostraddlin’ that is

          • I would also love to see/participate in a Canadian survey! My university town is like a queer vortex… Heck, almost everyone from my res who wasn’t queer to start with realized they were queer within the next seven years. I remember feeling -left out- because I wasn’t queer! From the first day of school onward girls were flirting with me and I thought, how unfair is this world that I’m straight and there are SO MANY BEAUTIFUL WOMEN EVERYWHERE WHO LIKE ME!? (I really should have realized I was gay at that point. Why is the gayee always the last one to know?!)

          • Im in the GTA , Kitchener-waterloo is pretty full of dykeys. at one of the campuses their club has sooo many LGBTQ events its crazzzy. and the drag shows that get hosted there are a pretty good time too.
            * AKA look up miss drew and crew. :) i adore them, and one of their members won Mr. International Tri pride or some chizzz.

            But yea, gotta agree, Montreal and Toronto are as full as the gett.

  8. A. I’m so proud to be in that Chicago picture. Like, so proud. Only problem, you can’t see my baller bow tie and suspenders.

    Chistrad <3 4ever.

    B. Someone in that picture is grabbing Jenin's butt (queer in front, white shirt, vest, and tie). WHO DO YOU THINK IT IS.

    C. If you live in Chicago and you're not a Chistraddler yet, start this very weekend–we're going to ROLLER DERBY.

    D. Seriously, don't know what I'd do without you guys.

    • I am also hella glad to be in that NYE pic. True story. I personally go to ALL Chicago roller derby (plus some other midwest derby) and I’m always willing to organize a group and get some discounted tickets for the Windy City Rollers. You don’t even have to live in Chicago to be one of us- several of our Chistrads live in Indiana!

      • Our Tri city rollers arent always that fun.. and thheyr always outta town. >.> So i never get to goo >_> im jelous.

    • A. I <3 the Chicagostraddlers! Even the ones who live in Indiana & the suburbs, I guess :P

      B. There are at least 4 possibilities. Maybe 5. But I will give you all a hint: I had an amazing time that night ;)

      C. ALSO AMY'S BIRTHDAY IS THIS WEEKEND ZOMG. MORE QUEERS! <3

      D. Well, without us, you'd have to do yourself?

      EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!

      • A. ROCKFORD is not a suburb of Chicago, but I’m still honored to be considered a Chicagostraddler!
        B. I actually am only 60% sure that it was Rachel’s hand.
        C. I am the other 40% sure that it’s Amy hand, so ya’ll will probs have a great time at her birthday.
        D. Marika is my patronus; true story.

    • Yeah, which bowtie did you end up choosing, anyway?

      Seriously though someday I will not work every single Friday/Saturday/Sunday night and come out to an event. In the meantime, any Chistraddlers feel like visiting the Pleasure Chest…?

  9. Aw, I didn’t know Outwrite was moving! That’s half the fun of going down to Atlanta for a day! The High Museum and Outwrite! Oh, and the Varsity. I don’t know of any large LGBT bookstore like that closer to where I live. I hope they stay afloat.

    • Hey, if you’re gonna go to the Varsity, you might as well swing by Georgia Tech, amirite? The library is seven floors tall, and its public access!

    • for bookstores, check out charis in little five. it’s feminist, independent, queer and needs everyone’s support. they have a fb group and post about a lot of events. check that out next time if you’re having outwrite withdrawal!

  10. Sigh…Northampton is #1 per capita.

    If I could do high school and university applications all over again, I would’ve worked my ass off so I could’ve gone to Smith or Amherst so I could live there. It seems like such a rad town with a great history.

    • UMass Amherst isn’t as hard to get into and is still the most awesome place ever!

      (… not that I’m biased or anything)

    • I was surprised to see Oakland down as having the highest concentration of lesbian couples, and then I remembered MILLS. All-girls, and when I visited it felt like super gay. Gayer than SF, where I’m from. It’s also less selective and a lot smaller than U Mass.

  11. I need to get out of MI. Ann Arbor is the sanest part of the state right now, and Grand Rapids is OK to be out in, but the rest of it…no. No one will let a lesbian teach their kids here.

    The only question left is, East Coast or West?

    • Hmmm…both are pretty great. You should assemble a pros and cons list.

      Mine went:

      Pros ~
      West coast: best coast, new experiences, having cali swag when I come back east
      East coast: beast coast, well known, more and better cities

      Cons ~
      West coast: earthquakes
      East coast: snow/summer like wearing a pair of spandex on your whole body…

    • Get out of GR asap! I lived there for 6 years and although it was slightly better then the rest of Michigan, by no means was it great.

    • hey! i’m in michigan, too. and while i can’t say many positive things about my current city of residence, this state has some cool things going for it. i understand the urge to leave, but what about all of the cool people in ann arbor and detroit?

      also, do any autostraddlers in michigan ever get together? if not, we should totally do that. if so, can i join?

      • I think the MiStraddlers are pretty spread out- one here, one there. Maybe more in and around Ann Arbor.
        We’ve only had one mini-meetup, in Traverse City, which was super fun!

  13. I’ve lived in 3 of these cities and currently live in one of them so I’d say I’m doing pretty well by following wherever the gay breeze takes me.

  14. If anyone in the Bay Area wants to party with nerdy college girls, ya’ll should roll through Stanny! We’ve got open hearts and open wine bottles, ya dig.

  16. Yes! Columbus is usually always ignored even though it is one of the most queer friendly cities in America with the rank of the most sexually active city in america and resource for many queer community studies. The Short north always has its rainbow flags flying high and boast the largest women’s night club in america. Side note, Columbus also has one of the first and largest queer burlesque groups. :)

    • Where is this large women’s nightclub in Columbus,OH ? I’m new to the lifestyle and I don’t know where to meet anyone.

  18. Oh, MA. Why did you make Northampton so far from Boston? Why are your public high schools in Cambridge and Somerville so sad? WHY DO YOU HAVE A LOTTERY SYSTEM, BOSTON?! And pray tell where then do the lesbian families with kids in HS flee to in your leafy, clinging suburbs?! (Preferably east of the 95, please and thank you, but there are no rules in love and war, nor are there in real estate.)

    I really, really, really love this post. It might just be my favorite. I think your guides are going to KICK ASS.

    • oh, boston suburbs. inside 95 i’d recommend lexington, pretty progressive town with great schools but pricey. newton and brookline also have good schools, i think. my dad just moved to brookline, so i can’t speak to those towns’ queerness yet. i grew up in a town off 495 called westford, which is more conservative/the most hetero, but has a high school that did teach me things and is ranked highly. other towns in the 495 belt to maybe consider would be carlisle, concord, bedford, littleton, sudbury. hope this helps!

      • Yes, so helpful!

        Lexington was our #1, but we’re worried it won’t have enough walkable stuff if we want to stroll to a market or cute little restaurant or whatnot.

        Everyone suggests Brookline but nobody is willing to give us an extra couple of hundred thousand dollars! Westford is a bit too far out for a Boston commute via rail, but Bedford’s on our list! (Though some have said it’s too suburban.) Do you feel Newton is less expensive than Lexington (it seems like it)?

        Others we’re considering: Natick, Needham, Winchester, Hingham, Belmont, Wellesley

        It is SO HARD to know which ones are too suburban/boring and commuter towns vs. ones w/ an adorable bustling little downtown or Main Street to hang out on when we don’t want to go v. far, but they all have exemplary HSs and houses within our budget. I wish Arlington HS had slightly better scores, because I think it’d otherwise be perfect for us. Whomp!

        • Hingham has a super cute downtown/main street and a couple nice shopping area, and some really good restaurants. I don’t know how many gay families/people are around though, and it can be very much the stereotype of new england yuppie-ness.

          • Very good to know! The tomboy is still worried as there are no bars.

            As for yuppies, we’ve resigned ourselves to a certain degree of it given the market, but we managed to hold our own with Rockridge parents for years, I’m sure we’ll be fine.

          • Public, actually, but no public charters (haven’t seen many of those with top marks). If we could afford private schools, we’d stay here and send her to Oakland’s College Prep!

        • Flee to Newton! As a recent graduate of Newton North High School, I would love to shamelessly plug my hometown: thirteen villages (each with their own town centre, replete with adorable coffeeshops) to choose from, 20 minutes commute to downtown Boston via the green line, extremely walkable/green and neighborhood-oriented, and a brand spankin’ new high school building and fields! Nonantum and Newtonville are reasonably affordable for their proximity to Boston, as well (http://www.trulia.com/real_estate/Newton-Massachusetts/). It’s safe, but not sleepy.

          With regards to North–which I absolutely adored)–it has very strong theatre, arts, and sports programs, as well as a plethora of advanced-placement courses to choose from despite recent budget cuts (the language department is also particularly strong and offers French, Spanish, Italian, Mandarin, and American Sign Language). I found it extremely inclusive and progressive. Also, the principal is queer! Hey, gays. Did I mention the building is new and eco-friendly? Only downside is you’ll be paying for it.

          • You’re a peach! Do you know how zoning is determined / laid out for ensuring enrollment at Newton North? Does this basically mean you can’t walk a mile in Newton in any given direction without hitting a super cute little ‘hood with coffeeshops and such? It sounds like a really lovely school. I’m so glad you posted!

          • Each elementary school has a district, and about four elementary schools “feed” into a middle school, and two middle schools “feed” into a high school. Therefore, the elementary school districts that feed into North are Burr, Cabot, Horace Mann, Lincoln-Eliot, Peirce, Ward, and Williams (since the last time I checked)–houses near those schools should be in the North district. You can check which school district your address is in using http://www.ci.newton.ma.us/wpinternet/index.asp, and a map of the high school districts is here: http://www.newtonma.gov/MIS/gis/Maps/High%20School%20Districts.pdf

            However, if you live within a mile radius of a high school not in your assigned district (happened to me), you can request to attend the closer one.

            I would say that within a mile of anywhere you choose to live in the North district, you will find a supermarket, at least two coffeeshops, and ice cream shop, great restaurants, a park, a pharmacy, and some sort of community education building. Some of my favorite village centers include Newton Center (the largest, near Crystal Lake), West Newton (near the Charles River and Moody St. in Waltham, source of incredible ethnic food and thrift shops), and Auburndale.

            Please let me know if you have more questions, I could rave about Newton forever.

        • I think you’d love the Cambridge area. Porter Square is nice. Newenglandmoves.com is a good website to search for properties. If you are searching for a condo, you’ll have some good choices. However, single family homes are pretty rare/expensive in the area. Some good Cambridge zip codes to search are 02138 and 02140. Have you thought about Arlington? The Massachusetts Avenue strip through Arlington is bustling with an historic movie theater and restaurants. If you want my feedback on properties or areas you find, I’d be happy to give you my two cents. It can be difficult to really know a neighborhood if you’re not from the area.

    • Hey now, I don’t know where you’re getting your info but I went to Cambridge’s public high school and it was actually quite phenomenal. Things were a little crazy in the 90s I hear but it has seriously become an awesome school. The arts program, for example, was recognized as comparable in quality to that of a private school. And heck, it’s pretty LGBT-friendly too. Our principle was gay for Christ’s sake.

      I’m a little embarrassed to rant on this subject but honestly, especially after hearing other people’s shitty high school experiences, I’ve got mad love for my school.

      • Oh man, how tragic… I just wrote “principle” instead of “principal.” Cambridge education is awesome, I swear! PLEASE BELIEVE ME ): ): ):

        *cough* it’s late, apologies

      • Don’t be embarrassed, please, it’s truly essential for parents to have a perspective like yours. I’m very glad you’ve spoken up and meant no offense!

        The info has been culled from multiple sources, one of which currently rates Cambridge R&L at a 5/10 based primarily on testing (which is important but not everything, I know). We have 5s and a few iffy 7s here in the bay, so we’re focused on improving upon that as much as humanly possible. If you feel any of those shitty experiences you’ve heard about are relevant to our interests, by all means share!

        • Yeah I’ve actually heard really good things about Cambridge R&L too. Matt Damon went there.

          If you’re willing to move out to western mass, Hadley (the town on the other side of Amherst from Noho) has way cheaper housing prices and a good public school.

    • I love Hingham!

      Have you looked at Sharon? You’d have to do commuter rail (Providence Line) but it has a nice center, lots of green space, good schools, big Jewish communities, fairly diverse for a suburb. It also has a cheap movie theater!

  19. I’m moving to the bay area and I can’t decide between Oakland or San Francisco. Every one says Oakland but the last time I was there, I didn’t like the neighborhood I was in. I was near Mills College. Liked the college. Not the neighborhood. If someone could give me safer (and preferably gayer- if that’s even possible) alternatives I could make up my mind!

    • Yes, that area is mostly neighborhoods (both nice and not very) and a crumbly strip fairly far from the more accessible hubs closer to downtown.

      Most lesbians I know (and I myself have) live(d) right around the lake, in the Grand Lake and Lakeshore areas, some near Piedmont Avenue or Temescal. On the most expensive side, Rockridge, on the least expensive, probably downtown and/or on the other sides of the lake. There’s lots of exciting stuff going on in Jack London Square, but I think it’s more common to find lofts for lease instead of rentals, but it can’t hurt to look. All of those areas are super walkable, bikeable, and within a mile or two of a BART station, more or less.

      I lived in Oakland for 10+ years and still feel safer there than I do for the most part in SF. Even the posher neighborhoods can be sketchy depending on the block in some cases, but a Google street view can aid you there – and feel free to message me here if you’re not sure, I’m happy to give my two cents!

    • I lived in Oakland, right on Lake Merritt. It was decently good. Within walking distance of a lot of stuff and the neighborhood seemed to be a lil more… I don’t know what word… safe? Maybe? I don’t know. I walked in the dark a lot (with pepper spray, ha!) but always felt pretty comfortable. And it’s pretty.

    • I live in North Oakland/South Berkeley. It feels safe to me. It kinda sucks to not have a car, but most everything I need is within walking or biking distance, including the BART. it feels super gay all the time for real though, like everyone here has agreed to be okay with it moreso than i even felt in like, new york city when i lived there for 6 years.

    • I live in a so-so area of Oakland, sort of near Mills college. It’s very suburban feeling, and I don’t love to walk around at night. Even though 99% of the time I have a pack of dogs with me, it still feels dangerous. But I think that’s more to do with the fact that no one is out and it’s very quiet. I grew up in Bernal Heights in SF, and LOVED it. There were two lesbian bars ON MY STREET, and so I’m really spoiled. I moved to Oakland awhile ago and for a long time hated it and wanted to go back to the city. But now that I’ve been here for so long, anytime I go to the city I can’t help but notice how many rich/male/white people there are (compared to Oakland), which I never noticed when I lived there. What I miss most about SF is that I didn’t have to drive at all. In Oakland, you have to use the freeway to get to a lot of places. But again, I think that’s just my neighborhood. I really like the areas near the lake, grand ave and piedmont ave. I think all in all Oakland gets a bad rap. When I first moved here I was shocked at how many of my clients were super super rich. It’s incredibly diverse in a lot of different ways, which I love. Also, even though I’m always complaining about my neighborhood, three of the five houses you can see from my front door are owned by lesbians. Oakland is a pretty gay/awesome city, I’m just ruined cause I was born and raised in a small lesbian town. Anyways sorry for the giant paragraph……

      • Also, to add to my ridiculous paragraph above, It’s like 5 million times easier to find housing in Oakland then in SF, especially if you have pets! And the weather is very different, Oakland gets really hot and SF tends to stay pretty cold/foggy. And there’s less traffic! And TONS of beautiful parks!

        • The weather and really beautiful, natural diversity alone make it no contest. Add cheaper real estate and it’s just not a hard decision!

  20. Hooray for the Pioneer Valley Roller Derby shoutout in Northampton!

    And we’re recruiting, you guys! Our last Fresh Meat Night of the season is Wednesday, Feb 1, and you don’t have to know how to skate or anything about the sport to come check it out!

    If you’re looking for a super queer-friendly community of crazy and wonderful people, come check us out! I hope to see you there!

  21. Alright, Amherst-ians. Come out of hiding, I want to meet you guys.

    Also I would like to dispute that Diva’s is a lesbian dance club because everytime I’ve been there it’s been gay guys and straight girls who want to see the drag queens.

    • yeah, i’ve only been a couple of times but according to people i know who’ve lived here longer, Diva’s isn’t as much of a lesbian club as it used to be. i mean, it’s not uncommon to see queer girls grinding on each other, but it’s nowhere near the majority.

    • I didn’t know Diva’s was supposed to be a lesbian club. And I’ve heard not-so-hot things about it. I figure if I want to hang out with/meet queer girls I’ll just sit in a NoHo coffee shop for any length of time.

      • My tolerance for Diva’s keeps dropping as I move through college.

        It will always have a place in my heart though because it was the first club I ever went too (probably because they are one of the only places that let under 21s in).

        • i swear that i went one time last spring and the crowd was literally 80% lesbians… but every time since then it’s been deserted.

  22. Meet local like minded ladies in the We Straddle LA, Bitch group. the city is stocked <— "the" needs to be capitalized. I'm seriously just going to do this for fun guys.

  23. I’m in optometry school, and they make us have a meeting with an adviser to talk about where we want to practice and stuff. I think I’ll just print off this list as a reference on where I want to live.

  24. Loved this list. Warms this old dyke’s heart to see our community taking its righteous place on planet USA and clearly having such a good time doing so. HOWEVER, with the exception of Chicago (sort-of) and DC, there is a really striking absence of women of color in your photos. And most of your statistics positively reek of a white demographic. Wassup with that? Have things really changed so little since I was coming up?

    • Chicagostraddlers are a very diverse group of queers in many aspects, race included. Unfortunately, it’s hard to get us all together to take photos, so there is only a small sampling represented. Most of the places I go in Chicago, there is a good crowd of queers of color.

    • you’re absolutely right about the statistics. that’s part of why we’re hoping people will take us up on our offer to do city guides!

  25. So proud that Columbus made it to 21. In addition to the things mentioned above, it seems relevant to mention that this fair city is also awesome at dive bars and delicious food. There is so much grilled cheese, you guys.

  28. I just want to say that I am SUPER excited about the (future) existence of Queer Girl City Guides, because I am in the midst of grad school applications right now and have SO MANY QUESTIONS about all of the cities that I am applying to. So far I’ve determined that Toronto is super gay, Eugene and Boulder are both super hippie, New Haven has cheap mimosa pitchers on Sundays, and everywhere else is sort of a terrifying void. Except, according to this post, Atlanta is WAY cooler/gayer than I was giving it credit for. :)

  29. WAHOO PHILLY PRIDE!
    We also have the biggest Outfest in the nation. ^_^ And we have Giovanni’s Room in the gayborhood (LGBT + Feminist Bookstore), and Wooden Shoe Bookstore on South Street, only a few blocks away (Anarchist Bookstore). AND AND AND we’re one of the few cities in the nation that protects against sexual orientation AND gender identity!

    /philly fangirl. philly is my home<3

  30. My best friend is in the picture for Ann Arbor, MI. We went to the coming out rally this year on the Diag! It’s good to know that 70% of the same-sex couples are female…it never seems that way when I’m at Necto on Friday nights!

    • Totally agree with Aunnica. I think it’s about 3 lesbians to every 50 gay boys. And attractiveness is not guaranteed.

    • as a kid with a gay mom who grew up in ann arbor — i think there are lots of female same-sex couples in A2, they’re just not at Necto on Friday nights. The census is skewed towards residents and people who share households, I think.

  31. where the f is this dyke heights? i want to go to there. i live in madison, but it’s definitely not my hood.

      • So, you guys live on campus I’m guessing? Dyke Heights is Willy St/Atwood. The Gayborhood is around James Madison Park.

        Also THAT IS MY HOUSE IN THE BACKGROUND OF THE MADISON PICTURE :D

        • Dyke Heights is technically the residential area on the small hill right behind the Barrymore Theatre on Atwood – though it definitely extends throughout the Willy/Atwood area in general.

    • Whenever I see ladies with alternative lifestyle haircuts holding hands at the farmers market I want to ask them to be my friends. But I don’t, so the only homos I know here are my gf and the 1 person I knew before I moved here.

    • Hello fello Ithacans!!

      Not all here homos have alternative hairstyles… we could be friends!

      • yes! I, for one, have hair that one might call kinda moppy, and I would love if people would ask me to be friends!

    • What small town in Norcal? I lived in Eurkea and it had a fair amount of hippy types. (this was years ago however)

      • The hippy types are still there. Currently go to Humboldt State in Arcata (little bit north of Eureka to those who don’t know). LOVE IT. Everyone must see the redwoods at least once before they die… One of the must beautiful places I’ve ever seen in my life.

      • Oroville, near Chico. Chico is pretty liberal and accepting, but Oroville is still redneck. :/

          • The problem is that California is the third largest state in the union–it’s bigger than the ENTIRE COUNTRY of Japan!–so you can still be in CA and leave a whole lotta room for terrible geography.

            I spent a lot of time growing up in a tiny redneck town in the Sierras. The nearest city of any appreciable size was Fresno and that was over an hour away. Much of my time was spent fervently swearing never to live in a rural area again.

  35. I need to move and go to college out of Arizona, which of course didn’t make the list. I was born in Seattle and lived in upstate California when I was a kid, why when I realize my queerness am I stuck in AZ? Bleh. Are there special Lezzy college grants and scholarships I can apply to?

  36. Good for you guys! :D Dang now I can confirm that I’m the only straddler in the village (Hawaii)!

  39. SO there are legit more gay girls in the Boston area than there are men, period? Where’d that stat come from? That’s CRAZY. Also, does “gay” mean out and proud? Gay til graduation? Questioning? Bi? Bi-curious?

  40. Can we still write about a city if it made it to the lower ranks of this list? The description of the criteria for writing was much more than what was included in each city’s post, so if we have a ton of queer knowledge about our city, can we pleaseeeeee still write about it? I love my lez city, even though it’s ranked on here.

  42. Ugh, the Mudhens representing Seattle? WTF? They are actually from the Eastside, and us Breakers actually represent Seattle. We are gayer, and we beat them in every match. Enough Said.

  43. Woo, Minneapolis/St. Paul! I’m rubbish at finding other queer girls in the Cities, so I totes approve of this Queer Girl City Guide nonsense.

  44. SLC, UT was voted as the #1 gay city in the US this year. As a former rez… let me tell you… LOTS of lesbian action :) It’s like uprooting the Silverlake East Side lez’s from LA and sticking them in the mountains. They’re everywhere!

  45. SO glad that Austin is on here. This city is AMAZINGLY gay, and I find especially lesbian friendly. Unfortunately, I think lesbian bar here is ehhh….but with SO much to do here and it being so liberal, I find that where ever I go, I ALWAYS see lesbians. Awesome. :)

  46. Ah, and I also lived in Ft. Laudy/Miami….met my first serious girlfriend there….SO much fun. And I miss SHE Magazine! :(

    • Agreed. I’m looking forward to Canadian Queer City Guides, but I’d like to know the population data for Canada.

  48. This is why I need to move back to Portland, or at least get the hell out of the place where I currently live.

  49. WHY IS BURLINGTON, VT ON THIS LIST?! granted, sometimes the hipster/queer problem gets tiring, and it might not meet some people’s definition of a city (like having a dedicated any kind of gay bar…). but on all other dyke measures we absolutely beat motherfucking houston.

  51. ohhh the memories of the Rubaiyat bar (I think you were too young for that one Riese) and The Flame in Ann Arbor…

    • I think my parents telling me what The Flame was was one of the first times I ever heard about homosexuality

      • I was thrown out of the Rubaiyat for throwing ice cubes at men dancing–I HAD A VALID REASON. That bar was mainly women, but when women danced close they would actually come up and tell us to back off. They would let the few men grind away on the dance floor, though. Those fuckers. I preferred The Flame, a great gay dive bar.

  52. Y’all. Y’ALL. It’s blowing my mind that Chapel Hill is on the per capita list. WHAT. JUST WHAT

    • I know!!! I’m shocked too esp. since I’ve lived in Chapel Hill my entire life and not once ever seen this large collection of gay ladies that supposedly are around. It would probably help if I knew where the gay bars around here were. Then I’d probably find them :)

    • I know, right? How did that happen/how is Chapel Hill here but not Asheville? Asheville’s REALLY GAY. Have yall seen the “cesspool of sin” T-shirts?

      • Exactly. There is nothing specifically gay in the Thrill esp. compared to Asheville’s super gayness. It’s bewildering O.o

  53. I guess I kind of take extreme queer saturation of a city for granted, since I live in the bay area…. it’s cool to see so many other cities listed though, San Francisco gives you this weird California bubble mindset were you’re all comfortable being happy and liberal and don’t want to go anywhere else. So it’s reassuring to know that there are other places to go and be all queer that aren’t New York.

  54. what about Montreal? I know it’s in Canada, but it’s pretty close to the states and has a huge gay village

  55. Of course the picture for Denver is of Dykes on Bikes, because
    most of the lesbians I meet here are butch/masculine or flat out ugly, not like LA/NY lesbians. Also locals call it Menver, and the disproportionate male population includes the LGBT population which is dominated by gay males.

    • Yes, because there are no butch/masculine or ugly lesbians in LA/NY. Ugh. Sorry to be so blunt but you sound really horrible.

    • “most of the lesbians I meet here are butch/masculine or flat out ugly, not like LA/NY lesbians”
      because all LA/NY lesbians are femme and pretty?

      this is pretty offensive. and ‘lookist’.

  56. i’ll make sure to compile info and some photos of the city i’m currently living in, Madrid. fyi its super gay.

    • ahhhh, where were you a few weeks ago when i was in madrid?

      well, probably in madrid, since that’s where you live.

      carry on.

  57. Ohmygod, it’s official: I’m a huge nerd. I just got ridiculously excited that you used one of my photos in this article (Fruit Fest in Madison). Thanks!

    And yes, Madison is super queer friendly. Also very, very queer family oriented, despite Wisconsin still lagging behind on LGBT family rights.

  58. OK, I’m not sure how you’d do this technically, probably some plugin for the social networking section, but it’d be cool if you could list your city in your profile and your associated Queer Grrrl Guide came up. Then you can see who’s near you!

    I know MeFi has a thing where you put in your coordinates and it brings up Mefites near your area. Great for meetups :)

    also: AUSTRALIAAAAAAAAAAA. I can help with Brisbane. Rachelle where are you?

  59. Gender identity is protected in dane county, which is where Madison is located. It is not protected in Wisconsin as a whole, only in Dane county and Milwaukee.

  60. I was already planning on moving to Boston/Cambridge/Somerville after graduation. I AM SO SO PSYCHED.
    Also, Tufts is in Somerville. Apparently it’s pretty gay there too.

    Yay Philly!!

    why can I no longer like people’s comments?

  61. Just a heads up for Cambridge/Somerville/Boston ‘straddlers – We’re planning a meetup for Friday night before GirlSpot as well as a possible a meetup on Thursday night in Harvard Square prior to Mr. Goodbar at Oberon (AIDS Action Committee benefit). Currently mulling over locations, but check out the Autostraddle group page or our Facebook group page ) if you’re interested!

  62. Wait, wait, wait. Boston/Cambridge/Somerville has the largest lesbian community??
    Am I missing something? Where the hell are all the girls hiding?!

  65. Someone should so do Asheville, NC!! I’d be your correspondent, but I’m up to >here< with my thesis due in April. . .Best citylike town EVER! Full of massage therapists, vegans, herbalists, hippies, dread-wearers, LESBIANS & a music/arts festival every time you turn around. Hoop jam in downtown park every Tuesday in the summer; Drum circle every Friday that weather allows; and we were named Beer City USA for the second year in a row. Mountains, rivers, lakes, and LESBIANS!

  66. well this is good news, since i’m planning to move to Austin very soon! Anyone want to hook up a fellow straddler with a place to live and/or a job??

  67. yay! Northampton! It really is great here – I’m surprised so many of us come from my little college town! Come say hi!

  68. “You can hold hands with anyone you want, just remember to recycle!”

    I have never read a more perfect description of the Bay Area. Cheers.

  69. How does Phase 1, the countries oldest continuously operating lesbian bar, not get mentioned in Washington, D.C.’s write-up? I call shenanigans on the D.C. blurb.

    Still, on behalf of Washington, D.C. I’d like to accept this award and say how proud we are to be immediately behind Portland. I mean: Portland!!

    • Agreed! I moved out of DC a few years ago and will always have a place in my heart for the city’s gay scene. Do they still do jello wrestling nights at Phase 1? All I can remember was that nudity was usually involved and they would literally hose down the girls outside after matches.

  70. I’m a little disappointed that I don’t see Denver on this colorful list.. Maybe it’s time to move :o

  72. It’s true. I live in LA, work at a Coffee Bean, and I most definitely swing your way. As do SO MANY of my co-workers.

  73. Wow. My school town is included in one of the top cities by per capita numbers. Awesome! Now if only I could spot the lesbians…

  77. I’m in the States in October, visiting Washington DC and New York. Unfortunately I’ll be with school/my parents, and I’m not 21, so I doubt I’ll be able to get the full queer experience. Still, if I see anything hella gay, I’m going to force people to take photos of me with it. Hooray for equality!

  78. Thanks for the Pioneer Valley Roller Derby mention, Autostraddle team! We love that we’re a top lesbianish city, too.

    Slam Dinista
    PR Coordinator, PVRD

  79. hooray for philly!

    Only a hop, skip and a jump away at Bryn Mawr, girl-on-girl culture abounds.

    correct. ;)

  81. My gf lives in Columbus, and I’ll be moving there soon… this reinforces my good feelings about this life choice!

  82. Sigh…I hate living in Salt Lake. How do I find out where the queer girls are when I don’t even know?

  85. This reminds me that I should probably leave Chicago sometime for a place that is not bumfuck Wisconsin or bumfuck Indiana (hideaway vacations with friends are great, but so is culture)

    Now I just need to choose! Baaaah publish the guides soon so I can arrange a roadtrip, please!

  87. I’ll be making one of this of Venezuela cities! No one care i know but it’ll be fun for me to do it! xD

    My mom lives in Michigan… Im planning to go visit her there but after reading this, i dont know! Maybe i can convince her of meeting me in LA or NYC! :-D

  88. I-Town in the house! It’s quite true – you can’t throw a rock without hitting a fan of Ani (and we have a lot of rocks. Ithaca is gorges after all). Subsequently you can’t throw a rock without hitting one of your exes, your exes ex and your exes ex ex who you had a thing for back in high school. Some of you ladies should move o’er here to tip the balance, k?

  89. Yay Noho! The Greater-Springfield area has so many lesbians and lesbians circles/webs to get caught in. It is a college infested valley that is amazingly open to queer life, and for most of us Noho is our hub.

  90. If anyone does a guide for the San Luis Obispo/Santa Barbara area, please mention the Santa Maria drive-in as an attraction. I know it’s not real close to either but it’s pretty fucking awesome. As many people as can fit in a vehicle can go see two movies for five bucks each while wearing their pajamas and bringing all their own candy and nobody cares.

  92. I need a good affordable lesbo filled lace with a college that’s easy to get into. I’m sure Smith has high expectations and L.A/San Fran are expensive from what I have heard…I have no money too so I gotta get a job where ever I move…I’m off to look up how expensive Portland and Oakland are lol

  94. new york, new york! i love my city. i had no idea oakland was so lesbionic though. defintely something to think about if i ever consider a move out to cali, because i would definitely never do l.a.

  96. I live in Miami, and even tho gay boys have like 10 good clubs to go to, lesbians have none. We do have “ladies nights” which attract lesbians and hipster girls alike, making it a bit awkward when you mistake one for the other. I don’t want to move, and would love to throw lesbian parties in town, and possibly open a lesbian club, but every lesbian club that tried failed ( including truck stop tried to take off in Mia, and was closed a few weeks after). Any advice on how to attract lesbians to a club. I know there are many many gay women here, they just don’t go out? We do have pride (this is the 4th year) and aqua girl in may, but sucks there’s only two lesbian weekends and that’s it.

  97. In your Ann Arbor description I am a little confused as to why you named Royal Oak as having a lot of queers, but completely ignored Ferndale which is one of the gayest/most lesbionic cities in all of Michigan…it far surpasses Royal Oak in the Metro Detroit area particularly. I live in the gayborhood and we deserve the shout out FAR more than the bougie Royal Oak.

  98. Wow! I can’t believe Albuquerque NM didn’t get a mention. Are you living under a rock? It’s considered be THE Lesbian San Francisco. It works like this:
    Albuquerque + Subaru (legacy) = lesbian

    I’m not a lesbian but I drive a subaru legacy so I get the benefit of cute girls flirting with me whenever I drive around. Yay cute girls! Yay subarus! Yay albuquerque! It certainly give me a thrill.

  104. Can’t believe Oakland was lumped in with affluentwhitecisdude San Francisco and laughable neoliberal Berkeley!

    Also, the WhiteHo is located in Berkeley, not Oakland.

  106. I’m not that much of a internet reader to be honest but your blogs really
    nice, keep it up! I’ll go ahead and bookmark your website to come back later on. Many thanks

    • I think this list is missing Denver Colorado. I live in northampton ma and also have lived in amherst MA and I see more lesbians in Denver by far. In northampton it’s mostly college students and couples with families. So if you’re younger mid/late 20s-early 30s it’s honestly not the vibe. If you want a place to settle down with your partner, it would be more your speed.

  107. I’m trying to figure out the best place to be les and Jewish and maybe think of grad school, or a way to work up to it. I liked the Boston reference to Keshet. I’ve heard it’s pretty cool. NY is stereotyped, but I like that there’s a corridor of cool cities and towns back east. No offense to Cal people, but I have a lot of baggage from California. Very sad. I need to find a place where I feel like I can really start over. So… thoughts?

    • I would love to know where you ended up! I’m in the same boat, although thinking of going back to Cali. I do want to know where to find “nice Jewish (gay) girls”.

  108. In Austin, TX we also have the Texas Rollergirls, AKA the founders of the new modernized version of Roller Derby! Austin is super fun!

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  112. I started the Coalition For Gender Awareness at Mount Holyoke with three of my best friends! It’s so nice to see us on this list!

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  116. I am surprised Florida was not in there somewhere. The Villages in Florida touts a very high percentage of lesbians in comparison to other places in the U.S.

  117. I think it’s interesting that the per capita numbers clearly have some correlation with the wealth and education per capita numbers in these cities. And where they deviate, in places like New Haven CT, I’m willing to bet that a lot of lesbians in those cities aren’t actually residents, but college students at places like Yale…

    I’m a straight guy for the record. I don’t have any special interests in lesbian culture or anything, I just like sociology and I find this seeming relationship interesting…

  118. I have lived all over the USA and several parts of Europe. I have met, known and dated women from all over. This needed to be stated, to further justify what I am about to say next…

    Lesbians in California are not the slightest bit normal!!!

    All over the USA and Europe, the typical single lesbian mind-set is quite simple and makes perfect sense. In all places, including California, the concept of, “nesting,” is a known thing. So keep that in mind, as you continue to read.

    “I’m single. I don’t want to be single. Let me get off my lazy ass and get out of the house. Perhaps I may meet someone. If I do meet someone and the sparks fly appropriately, TOGETHER we will build our little nest… and hopefully live happily ever after.” THAT is everywhere I have ever been, except California.

    In Cali, except for the rare women’s event – with the rare exception of a baby-dyke or two – you seldom see single WOMEN. Why is this? One evening, I went to a gathering, held by a well-known gay bar, in Palm Springs. They called it, “the Pink Party,” held once per month for lesbians. Mind you, they haven’t held this event in a couple years now. But my first time there was an eye opener. Beyond the fact the event started at 7PM and the gay men pretty much took over, almost literally pushing the women out, somewhere between 10-11PM, it was the average lesbian in attendance. When I walked in, there were about 30-40 women. Myself, the bartender and one lesbian couple (a total of 4 women, including myself) had hair that was not solid blue, white or grey. Excluding the 4 of us, the average age was 60-70. Talking with a couple of them, I discovered MANY of them were single, and had been for the better part of 30 years! How the f*** does THAT happen? Here’s where the, “not normal,” part comes in…

    Besides the fact, most 1st dates in Cali feel like a job interview … “I’m single. I don’t want to be single. If I meet someone, I need to have a nice nest for her to come to. Therefore, I can’t go out this weekend. I need to paint the house. Next week it’s new curtains. The week after, I need to redo the lawn.” Thirty years later … out of final desperation, she finally shows up at the Pink Party! I get the, “I want to have a nice place to bring her,” concept. But seriously? To me, the concept of picking out OUR own bed, OUR sheets, OUR dishes and building a home together. I may be a bit of a lipstick and a tiny bit of a pillow princess, on occasion – you guys all know the type of woman that is – but, I would MUCH prefer to live somewhere that may not be the greatest place, provided the woman waking up next to me every morning is the love of my life.

    Yes, there are a lot of lesbians in California. But when you see them, they are usually already paired up and can’t be bothered by those they do not already know. Or, they are barely out of diapers and still trying to figure out what this lesbian stuff is all about.

    • Well Said AlleyCat27. And In Addition may I add That as Instead Of Lesbians in California are not the slightest bit normal, Going One (1) step further: California IS NOT The Slightest Bit Normal. I, as a Heterosexual Man, Feel strongly that Lesbian Women are Very Much Exploited for their sexual Preference for the politician’s expediency.
      I saw this topic on Google about lesbians and their preferred cities and NOW have an Answer as to just Why are there so many Man Haters here in the LA area.

    • Lesbians everyone are paired up but ive had great luck at queer girl night in San Diego.

  120. Austin,Tx is not for black lesbians at all… Honestly it’s not a friendly place for black people period..

  121. I can’t believe Boston area colleges were mentioned and Wellesley wasn’t one of them! Clearly there’s plenty of us here since we put this town as third on the per capita list…

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