In the 19th century, women had few options. Most were limited to marriage, the convent, or death. But money and status buys options and for Hungarian countess Irma Sztáray, that means she can be a handmaiden for Empress Elisabeth of Austria. Being an empress allows Elisabeth, nicknamed Sisi, more options too. She can hide away with her handmaidens in Greece far away from her oaf of a husband. But Frauke Finsterwalder’s complex and comic film Sisi and I about the relationship between Irma and Sisi posits that these additional options are still limited. No amount money, no amount of titles, mean total escape.

When the film begins, 42-year-old Irma is being handed over to Sisi by Irma’s frustrated and violent mother. She is passed from one domineering woman to another, the hazing of Irma immediate. She’s asked — nay, demanded — to run sprints, then hurdles, then pull-ups all in her heavy dress. Sisi laughs at Irma’s struggle. And yet, in the days to come, Irma can’t help but feel drawn to Sisi’s confused desires. Sisi plays her handmaidens against each other, oscillating between intimacy and repulsion with each of them, switching favorites on a whim.

While Sisi would be considered by many queer women at the time to be the luckiest person in the world, it’s clear the expectations of her title and marriage weigh on her even from afar. Her fixation on food and weight — for herself and her handmaidens — at first appears to be regressive humor from the filmmakers, while quickly revealing itself to be a sharp portrayal of disordered eating by someone desperate for any semblance of control.

The relationship between Sisi and Irma falls somewhere between abuse and love. The erratic behavior of Sisi is clearly a response to her own circumstances, and yet understanding motive doesn’t make experiencing the treatment any easier for the increasingly love-stricken Irma. Often queer media with this sort of complex relationship dynamic is focused on teenagers — either two teenagers or one teenager with an adult. It’s fascinating to see this configuration play out within a different power imbalance. These are two very wealthy white women in their forties who nevertheless have a large gap in status.

I’ve recently bemoaned the amount of period pieces that are imitating Marie Antoinette with their modern soundtracks. Sisi and I is proof that anything can still be done if done well. With songs like “Waiting” by Alice Boman and “Angel” by Seagull Screaming Kiss Her Kiss Her, the film gives its complicated central relationship the immediacy of modernity. It also simply uses its soundtrack with an immense effectiveness beyond any thematic read of the choice.

This is a well-written, well-constructed riff on history that would be worth a watch for anyone interested in stories about complicated queer women in period dress. But what — or, rather, who — elevates it to a must-watch is Sandra Hüller’s performance as Irma. The whole cast is great with Susanne Wolff another standout as Sisi — it’s just that Hüller is quickly establishing herself as an actor unlike any other. This was obvious in 2016 with Toni Erdmann and was solidified last year with her performances in The Zone of Interest and Anatomy of a Fall. It’s not only her complex portrayal of human emotion — she’s also so funny! Sisi and I is often quite bleak, and yet Hüller finds humor throughout. I’d watch her do anything and, luckily, in this film she has plenty of worthy material to play with.

Throughout much of the film, Irma is happy. She’s happy, because she’s finally been granted the freedom to be gay. It’s a very toxic, borderline abusive sort of gayness, but it feels like home all the same. This may be a semi-true period piece about a countess and an empress, but that core feeling is relatable to many. A lot of us forgave misguided relationships in our early queer years, because we were so excited to be out.

Like all good period pieces, Sisi and I captures a human truth still relevant to today. In a world that hates us, we often take our frustrations out on each other.

Sisi and I is now playing in theatres. 

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