Once upon a time (May 30th-June 4th, to be specific) in a land far far atop a mountain two hours outside of sunny Los Angeles, approximately 300 queer humans — 250 campers and 50+ staff and talent — gathered for four days and four nights of revelry, intellectual stimulation, dance parties and deep sea bonding. They called it A-Camp 6.0, and it was beautiful! This is the second of four fantastic recaps which serve to ease our collective separation anxiety, give you a behind-the-scenes look at how your A-Camp soysage is made, enable us to wax nostalgic over times gone by and provide prospective campers with a brilliant glimpse into the A-Camp Experience from the Staff Side Of Things. (If you wanna know how it feels to be a camper, you’ll have to come to camp!)

A-Camp was the genesis of an idea Riese had at 3AM in July 2010: the concept was to take the spirit of the website into three glorious dimensions by renting a summer camp in the off-season and jam-packing a long weekend with panels, workshops, discussions, crafts, sports, entertainment, parties and so much more! We gave the idea a spin with an abbreviated, smaller edition of A-Camp in April 2012, followed by full-size full-length camps in September 2012, May 2013, October 2013, May 2014 and May 2015.

This camp was our best camp yet. Seriously, we were very on top of our game. This required raising prices, but we think the extra expense was well worth it — I mean, we had a bouncy castle! We had an all-star cast of special talent: actress and DIY Queen Jasika Nicole, Everyone is Gay super-idols Kristin Russo and Dannielle Owens-Reid, musicians Julia Nunes, Jenny Owen Youngs and Mal Bum and comedians Brittani Nichols, Deanne Smith and Elicia Sanchez. Plus, Orange is the New Black’s Lauren Morelli showed up for an hilarious afternoon Q&A, Kimber Hall improvisationally enterained us with Brittani and former Miss Kentucky Djuan Trent sang from her soul. A DELIGHTFUL TIME WAS HAD BY ALL.

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A-Camp 6.0, Two: May 31st, 2015

Morning Activities

Block A: Finger Knittin’ Good (Jasika Nicole) // Writer Writer Pants on Fire (Ali & Hansen) // Bisexual Mountaintop Summit and Feelings Atrium (Rachel, Cecelia, Stef, Elicia, KaeLyn & Liz Castle) // Introvert Meetup (Heather & Whitney) // We’ve Got Your Back: Acts of Community Care (Gabby, Laura, Alex & Mary) // Music Hike (Jenny Owen-Youngs & Mal Blum)

Block B: Say It With Your Chest: Movement Workshop (Brittani Nichols) // Macrame Plant Hangers (Cee & Laneia) // Pool Games (Robin, Mary & Cleo) // Write Your Face Off #1 (Rachel & Heather) // Queer Herstory Trivia (Carmen, Maddie, Carolyn W & Kaelyn) // Intro to Everyone is Gay (Kristin Russo & Dannielle Owens-Reid)

Dannielle Owens-Reid, The Talent: I woke up hella early and sat on a log journaling for the first time in months. Which is ridiculous, but I guess you kind of forget to journal when you’re super happy? IDK. IT was peaceful as fuck and I want to go back to that morning every single day.

Djuan Trent, Contributor & Beehive Counselor: After helping Megan set up some things, I went and found a tree stump to sit on and I did some meditating. It was nice. The air on the mountain was crisp and the sun was so warm on my skin.

Laura Wooley, Former Associate Editor & Sea Otters Counselor: It is my personal belief that swings are one of the finer things in life. The only thing better than swinging is swinging at 7,000 ft above sea level among 300 gorgeous queers.

Lizz Rubin, Former Style Editor & Witchblades Counselor: Jasika taught me and my adorable girlfriend Chrissie how to finger knit in Finger Knittin’ Good and I made this incredible scarf! Guys I made this scarf with my freaking hands! My hands I tell you!

Liz Castle, Tower of Terror Counselor: UGH IM SO SAD I MISSED FINGER KNITTING WITH JASIKA!!! I feel like I got to enjoy plenty of finger knitting jokes later which was good too, but I still want to steal her away and have her teach me her incredible crafty ways!

Kristin Russo, The Talent: OMG WE MET JASIKA AND CLAIRE TODAY! *heart eyes emoji*

Maddie Taterka, Staff Writer and Firebirds Counselor: Y’all BROUGHT IT for Queer Herstory Trivia. You also were very patient which was nice of you.

KaeLyn Rich, Staff Writer and Shark Week Counselor: I wrote such long and ridiculous questions. But don’t you know so many new facts now about Angela Davis and ACT UP? Don’t you?! I had so much fun and Maddie looked so adorable in her rainbow cape.

Maddie: If anyone wants to know even more about Angela Davis, you can read Carmen’s Idol Worship about her.

Riese Bernard, CEO/Editor-in-Chief and Runaways Counselor: Red Team CRUSHED IT at Queer History Trivia. We were off to a great start in the Rainbow Wars.

Cee Webster, Tech Editor & Fried Green Tomatoes Counselor: The macrame plant hangers workshop went really well! Everyone finished their plant hangers and dip dyed them and hung them in the tree outside, as you do. I’m excited folks can now hang their house plants free from their cat’s teeth.

Lizz: After I made a scarf with my hands I made a macrame plant holder. It was super fun to make but Chrissie kept saying I would never use it for a plant. She actually turned out to be right: I’m using it for stuffed animals.

Stef Schwartz, Music Editor & Campires Counselor: I brought hummus! I brought snacks to The Bisexual Mountaintop Summit & Hummus Appreciation Society and nobody else did. For a while I stood next to my sad little tub of hummus and told bisexuals that they could have some if they wanted, but I guess it’s really hard for bisexuals to commit to a decision so very few of them chose to indulge.

Cecelia White, Intern and Witchblades Counselor: I enjoyed some of Stef’s generous hummus faire, because I appreciated its role as the only dip present. There was no time to even think about dips, really, because the discussion was so enriching!

Elicia Sanchez, Comedian and Ghost Power Counselor: Attending and co-leading the Bisexual Meetup was a really great experience for me. I never realized how many campers identified as bixexual and seeing that helped to make me feel much more like I belonged.

Kai Keller, Calendar Girl and The Beach Counselor: It might have given me the most feelings I’ve had at camp ever. The discussion circle I was in was open and fluid and had me confronting all sorts of internalized backwards bullshit I’d been holding onto for a long time.

Rachel Kincaid, Managing Editor and Ghost Power Counselor: We try to do the bisexual discussion group differently each year, and while there’s always room for improvement, I was really happy with how things went! We wrote discussion questions on the wall, gave people time to write thoughts or responses below, and then broke into groups to discuss. We probably could have gone on talking for much longer than the time we had — for days! — but it was cool to be able to dig into some more specific and complicated stuff, whereas in past years I’ve felt like we only had time to discuss some very broad strokes of our shared experiences.

Elicia: Every year I have moments at camp where I find out something I thought I worried or suffered through on my own is actually a commonly shared experience. This was one of those moments, learning that other campers struggled with invisibility or feeling alienated by our respective queer communities at times.

Kai: I sat quietly for a while and just listened and felt surrounded by such brave, smart souls. Then I said words that were scary for me to say and was verbally and physically hugged, loved on.

Stef: I sat down with a brilliant group of campers and we talked about how we self-identify, and whether it’s important to label ourselves “bisexual” or with any terms at all. I’m constantly inspired by just how fucking intelligent and insightful our campers are. I could have stayed there all day.

Cecelia: We doodled our bisexual dreams and discontents on a big white piece of poster board, and I gained so much just reading everyone’s thoughts. I also learned the importance of building strong bisexual communities wherever I go, which has been a really important personal goal to carry with me from the mountain.

Emily Gigler, A-Camp Dancing Queen: A-Camp 6.0’s bisexual gathering was my favorite one so far; so many queers all hanging out in such a chill setting made for some very real, poignant, and hilarious conversations. I felt relaxed and at ease and safe and seen and it was wonderful.

Cecelia: I realized in that exact moment surrounded by so many (so many!) beautiful bisexuals that I had never really expressed my complicated feelings about my own bisexuality and I do in fact feel essentialized, thank you.

Kai: Someone mentioned how diverse in presentation we all were, and it was so true! Bisexuality and queerness come in so many forms, and duh I know this, but to see so many of those gorgeous people sitting in a circle in front of me.

KaeLyn: It was amazing to see a packed room of bi/pan/omni/queer folks.

Elicia: We also talked about hummus for a bit which became important because I learned about specific flavors of hummus I didn’t realize existed before, the titles of which I can no longer remember which is unfortunate and probably the lost key to my current daily survival.

KaeLyn: We solved all the problems and now no one will ever be gender essentialist or biphobic again. Hooray! We did it! Seriously, though, we are really the quiet majority, statistically and realistically. It was beautiful to talk with ya’ll about our experiences and to pool our strength.

Sarah Hansen, Former DIY Editor and Fun Home Counselor: Writer Writer Pants on Fire was a huge success, mainly due to everyone’s horrified faces when we told them to pass their journals to the person next to them. But everyone rolled with it and some incredible stuff came out of it. Gavin ate a ton of disgusting Bertie Bott’s Beans and another camper’s work made me tear up a little as they read it aloud. At camp, I’m just totally amazed by everyone’s talent all the time.

Ali Osworth, Tech Editor and Star Runners Counselor: The Bertie Bott’s Every Flavor Beans exercise — it def yielded really strong work. To anyone who ate the rotten egg flavor, just know that once my school had me do a shot of MSG and write about it. They did not tell me that it was MSG before I swallowed it.

Laura Wooley, Former Associate Editor and Sea Otters Counselor: The Community Care Workshop was such a good way for me to officially start camp.

Gabby Rivera, QPOC Speakeasy Founder and Beyhive Counselor: It meant so much to me. Acts of care got me through a very difficult year and I wanted to share them with everyone on the Mountain.

Laura W: As much as I love it, I sometimes feel isolated up there, so it was really nice for me to start with something about radical love.

Gabby: Laura and I put a lot of work into developing the workshop and putting together the ‘zine. Mary and Alex were the most supportive and thoughtful co-facilitators.

Djuan Trent: I didn’t have anything to do on this morning, so I just kind of wandered around and watched other people do things. Gabby’s workshop seemed to be a hit and when she was explaining it to me the night before it seemed like something I could totally relate to, so I went.

Laura W: I felt like we all got off on our very best foot: Gabby made people feel welcome, I helped people make something, campers talked about the hard parts of community care, and Mary and Alex helped us think about how we can use play to deal with rough times.

Gabby: All of you in the workshop were the best! You were all game to make lavender salve and to give each other platonic hand massages. You shared best practices on how to engage in deeper levels of community care. Aida from the Beehive hooked us up with “5 ways we learn” and touch was one of them! Gloria asked us how we can think beyond just ourselves and give love when our friend communities are fractured.

Laura W: Gloria really brought it to another level.

Gabby: Gilles told us about how they dress up their cat in costumes and make music videos to de-stress. Like we all laughed and shared and engaged with each other. It was such a good way to kick off camp.

Alex Vega, Design Director: It ended with everyone making new friends by giving each other hand massages with the lavender salve they had made during our open discussion about how to take care of ourselves and each other. Like. I can’t even. So beautiful.

Trent: It’s important that we care for ourselves and it is also important that we care for each other. I hope people were really able to take away from it!

Rachel: During Block A was the first-ever meeting of my writing workshop — I had asked to try something new, which was having a recurring workshop on multiple days of camp so there was time to try different things and build on previous exercises, and was REALLY nervous about how the first day would go. Most of my teaching experience is with bored undergraduates who don’t want to be in class, and so it was hard for me to believe that people would actually choose to spend time on it, for multiple days no less. But people did! We introduced ourselves, did some small exercises, and Heather Hogan guest starred to run an exercise where people experimented with different writing voices and audiences.

Kristin Russo: Before our Intro to Everyone is Gay, Dannielle and I took a walk in the woods to prepare for some of the upcoming workshops. Before camp we’d been untangling a lot of future plans for Everyone Is Gay and it was really hard for us to connect without the stress wrapping us up. That walk in the woods was really special and made me feel re-connected to my business-wife in a much needed way. Then it was time. AHHHHH! Our very first activity!

Carly Usdin, Special Programming Director: I hung out and ran slides for Kristin & Dannielle and it was really fantastic. I knew who they were and what they did before camp, but I hadn’t really had a chance to get to know them as yet.

Dannielle Owens-Reid: Our intro was super fun. We hadn’t planned to use any slides or video or whatever, but Carly and Grace were fucking BOSSES throughout camp, including this.  They kept going with the flow in ways that we shouldn’t have had to make them flow and we were so grateful.

Kristin Russo: This was the first time we were officially chatting with campers… and it ruled. It was awesome to talk to people who knew about our work, but really, really fucking awesome to introduce new humans to what we do, and how we do it. I LOVE CAMP.

Carly: Watching them talk about what they do, and seeing how much passion they bring to it, was really inspiring and wonderful.

Carolyn Wysinger, Contributor & Firebirds Counselor: During workshop session B I ended up in the most awesome conversation about community and social justice with my cabinmates Maddie, Laura M, Morgan and Carmen. Morgan and I had the most accountable and consensual conversation that has ever been had by anyone ever in life. We talked about fucked-up things in our respective communities (without trying to make it about us) and made jokes. It was awesome and accountable and super crass and fun all at once!

Brittani Nichols, The Talent & Tower of Terror Counselor: Oh, I’m sorry but the movement workshop was perfect and everyone that came was perfect. I’m always nervous doing things that require people to get out of their comfort zone because it’s scary! To see so many people show up and have fun and tell stories with their bodies was amazing. Immediately following that workshop was the best I felt all camp. The power of the arts, I tell ya.

Whitney Pow, Former Contributing Editor & Star Runners Counselor: It was so good running the Introvert Meet Up with Heather Hogan! A lot of people showed up, and we had a wonderful time hanging out, drinking tea, making stylish lanyards, and talking about self-care on the mountain.

Heather Hogan, Senior Editor & Hogwarts Counselor: I was actually shocked to see so many introverts at camp. Shocked and excited! Honestly, just knowing there were other people on the mountain who wanted to connect and learn and grow and have fun, but who also were exhausted at the prospect of doing that in the company of so many other humans, it made me feel very at home. Next year, I’m excited to implement the Friend Stop, which is a concept introduced by one of our campers this year. I think it’s going to be a big hit with the introverts!

Whitney: We chatted about the merits of arranging a regular Buffy the Vampire Slayer watching group in your town, complete with beer and Skype commentary for people who might be far away (which is something my friends and I have done!), and organizing board game nights. Speaking of which, I had the opportunity to play Betrayal at House on the Hill at camp with some lovely campers in Falcon one evening, and I had a great time. If you like board games, you should check this one out.

Heather: Whitney was absolutely the best. So calm and reassuring. It set the tone for a really wonderful camp for me.

Jenny Owen-Youngs, The Talent: I led a music hike with Mal! I was uncertain if the concept was meant to be “hike with musicians” or “hike while music happens” so I borrowed a ukulele from Julia and figured Mal and I could wing it and whatever happened happened. We also realized we had zero idea of where any trails were, so we recruited THE AMAZING ROBIN ROEMER to be our trek tech.

Jenny: While Robin told us which hill to hike up, Mal and I sang a song at everyone and quickly learned a valuable lesson about lung capacity and extreme altitude in combination with actively hiking. When we reached our final destination — a beautiful overlook — Mal and I led singalongs (with varying degrees of success) of T Swift’s “Mean,” Beyonce’s “Irreplaceable,” and Nicki Minaj’s “Super Bass” (special thanks to camper Kat for handling the verses; turns out Nicki Minaj songs are not like riding a bike, you gotta USE IT OR LOSE IT). I had a LOT of warm and fuzzy feelings while all this was happening. Then RR led us safely back down the mountain, and no one got lost or was eaten by a bear. SUCCESSFUL HIKE!

Bren Christolear, Editorial Assistant & Fried Green Tomatoes Counselor: This year Megan and I shared the responsibility of setting up all the things. Sunday morning Megan was supposed to be in charge of setting things up and I was just gonna help her. Or so I thought. Megan thought I was supposed to be in charge of setting things up and she was helping me! So then we just decided to help each other all the time. I mean, its camp!

Megan O’Grady, Program Support Coordinator: I think we have the best set-up team that mountain has ever seen.

Afternoon Activities

Block A: Bloody Hell 2: High Tea, Low Tide (Laneia, Carolyn, Lizz R & Claire) // This is a Holdup: Make Your Own Suspenders (Laura Wooley) // QPOC Speakeasy (Gabby, Yvonne, Elicia, Kaylah, KaeLyn, Cameron, Carmen, Cecelia, Brittani, Laura M, Jasika Nicole, Whitney, Djuan, Mey, Carolyn W & Kai) // Sex in Video Games (Morgan) // Creating a Community Newspaper for Weirdos (Grace, Hansen, Chelsey & Heather)

Block B: Celebrity Dance Grooves (Kaylah & Djuan) // Sciency Bar Tricks (Laura Mandanas) // Gender Pronoun Crafts (Whitney & Mey) // Feels Academy (Taylor, Heather, Liz C., Gabby) // A Conversation with Brittani Nichols & Lauren Morelli

Carolyn Yates, NSFW Editor and Fun Home Counselor: I missed the first Bloody Hell but I was super excited for Bloody Hell 2, in which we got the chance to talk about alternative menstrual products and new moon rituals and people of different gender presentations reconnecting with their bodies regardless of whether or how they bleed, and it seemed like everyone could have kept going for hours.

Lizz Rubin: It was so much better than Bloody Hell 1 because we made it more feelings focused and less medical which I LOVED. I did however draw a huge uterus, cervix and vagina in the dirt for everyone.I loved hearing so many women’s feelings about their periods. Their struggles and their moon ceremonies.

Laneia Jones, Executive Editor and Runaways Counselor: We had everyone come down to the table and play around with the many products donated from Holy Sponge, Luna Pads, and Glad Rags, and we are so grateful to those companies. I think a major hurdle with sustainable menstrual products is that they’re foreign to most of us and we just don’t have any idea where to start or what we’re dealing with in terms of like, the size or look of these products. Campers shared stories and practices and asked questions — not just of us, but of each other, which was amazing.

Lizz Rubin: It just felt like everyone was coming from a really similar and really different place. I can’t explain it. It was incredible. Most importantly: I was actually technically getting my period during the bloody hell period feelings atrium. It was so right.

Gabby: The QPOC Speakeasy is my heart and soul. I’m so honored to be a part of the queer/trans people of color space on the mountain.

KaeLyn: The Speakeasy is the most beautiful thing on the mountain. Better than the fiery #nofilter sunsets. Better than the cool, still silver mornings. Definitely better than the veg options at dinner.

Carolyn W.: I thank God every day that I was asked to be on this random panel last camp for QTPOC Straddlers, which turned out to be the speakeasy.. My life hasn’t been the same since. I’m so grateful to Gabby for letting me be her deputy. Or her Vice-Principal. Or her deacon (cause The Speakeasy is damn near a religious experience.)

Yvonne, Senior Editor and Shark Week Counselor: This was QPOC Speakeasy’s second year at A-Camp and just like the year before, it filled me with so much love to be in a QPOC-only space!

Carmen Rios, Straddleverse Editor and Rodeo Disco Counselor: I’ve loved doing QPOC activities at A-Camp since our very first panel way back when, and it was amazing seeing how many people and how much love came to this year’s Speakeasy.

Trent: It was so great to see all of the QPOC gathered on the mountain, getting to know each other and sharing their feelings.

Gabby: From friend-speed-dating to making an A+ Bee to breaking out into small and large groups just to talk, the entire Speakeasy workshop was a lovefest.

Carolyn W: When the session started we were literally bursting out of Deer. There was barely space to move.

Gabby: We could use a two-hour block and still need more time and a bigger space. God, everyone is beautiful and open.

Carolyn W: I was nervous and excited to see how many folks showed up to the space. Gabby lost her voice that morning and asked me to open the space which was never a question. We had a great discussion about why The Speakeasy exists and our hope for the space.

Yvonne: I can’t believe the Speakeasy doubled its size from the last camp. The entire time we were together at Deer Lodge I was just like fuck yeah! we’re gonna take over this m*therfuckin camp!

Gabby: I loved it when the A-Camp staff squad introduced themselves to everyone and found a group to speed-date with and I loved Elicia being the host.

Carolyn W: Elicia held it down during a rowdy speed-dating session. I loved looking out and seeing all those QTPOC folks connecting. It was so beautiful.

Elicia: I love the QPOC Speakeasy, even if every time I called stop on the speed-friending rounds everyone got pissed at me. Sorry, ya’ll. I was just doing my job!

Yvonne: Friend speed dating was excellent! I met so many new faces. The only bad thing about the speed dating is I wanted to keep talking.

Gabby: Carolyn made sure that everything was going smooth. Like everyone pitched in and did their thing. Thank you for everyone who brought their real life into the space and made connections with others.

Carolyn W: I was and AM in awe of what The Speakeasy has grown into.  I had to hold back the tears. I agree with Gabby the sky is the limit!!! I’m ready for next year!!

Trent: I was mostly there to just chill and observe and I thought I would get away with doing so until Jasika convinced me to actually mingle and participate. I’m glad she did because I really enjoyed it! You know, we all have feelings. And sometimes, we don’t realize how many feelings we have until we find other people who share our feelings and experiences.

Grabby: Ev’Yan from the Beyhive brought out the feels in the larger breakout group. She was the one who started things off by being honest about her feelings and what articles from Speakeasy members and the Speakeasy FB group have brought into her life. I was grateful to her for that.

Laura Mandanas, Staff Writer & Outsiders Counselor: I have learned so much about myself and the world through the conversations we’ve been having on facebook, and it was so wonderful to have that support and love carry over into a physical space.

Trent: Pretty much everyone who goes to A-Camp knows what it feels like to exist in the world where everything around us promotes heteronormativity — sometimes you want to see things and people that reflect your queerness. And in that same regard, being not only queer but also a POC, you want to see things and people that reflect your QPOC’ness- and this is what the Speakeasy provides, this is why it is so necessary and important.

Whitney: I had amazing conversations with about QPOC role models, jobs and life with other queer and trans people of color at A-Camp.

Carmen: Then we spoofed the A-Camp Bee and I turned the Schwartzcast into a Drakecast as per Brittani’s suggestion. Sorry Stef, but I’m not sorry at all.

Elicia: I am always inspired by the community leadership skills of Gabby and Carolyn. Also, thanks Yvonne for helping out with questions and a shout out to my zine team who did GREAT WORK creating the backside of the Speakeasy Bee!

Whitney: The Speakeasy is a really wonderful and safe space, and I’m so happy that I can be a part of it.

Gabby: We went from 34 queers of color at last year’s speakeasy to about 66 this camp. The sky’s the limit y’all. Let’s double our numbers for next camp!

Liz: I went to Laura’s “This is a Hold-up: Make Your Own Suspenders” workshop, which not only had the cutest name, but also gave me the cutest pair of suspenders!

KaeLyn: Jae came over to me and was like, “Lauren Morelli just helped me make suspenders. LAUREN MORELLI JUST HELPED ME MAKE SUSPENDERS.”

Liz: Lauren Morelli and I made matching leopard print suspenders and I definitely want to wear them every day.

Laura W: Dear Lauren Morelli: it was really fun making suspenders with you. I think you had fun too. If you ever feel like a suspender-making workshop would be a good bonding experience for the cast of Orange is the New Black, I’m your girl. Sincerely, Laura W.

KaeLyn: …and then Jae and I sat next to each other at The Lauren Morelli & Brittani Dinner Show Experience. My butt hurt from sitting on that log, but it was worth it.

Stef: I’m excited that we finally somehow convinced Lauren Morelli to join us in our mountain paradise.

Yvonne: Omg, I was so excited to listen to Brittani and Lauren Morelli speak because I knew it was going to be so hilarious.

Riese: Basically the idea was that Lauren and Brittani were gonna have their weekly dinner date in front of us, on a stage. Everybody got to submit suggested topics of conversation. Apparently a lot of them were about Samira Wiley, but a lot of them weren’t, and they answered them and they laughed and everybody laughed and it was incredible.

Brittani: The dinner talk with Lauren was a true blast because I felt like I was showing off my best friend to the world. (Never let her read this because I will never hear the end of it.)

Ali: If Britani could interview everyone forever, I’d be cool with that.

Stef: The teasers she gave us about Season Three of Orange Is The New Black helped remind me that I’d still have something to live for when we got back down to sea level.

Cecelia: I laughed, I cried, I thought a lot about the important work of writing honest queer narratives into mainstream media. It made me think about something a writing teacher once told me, which is that you write because you need to figure out a personal question that you don’t know the answer to. The fact that Lauren’s personal coming out story aligned so beautifully with her writing was a really great reflection of the “answer the question within you” lesson. It made me feel like I don’t have to have it all figured out yet, and as a writer, that’s kind of the point.

Cecelia: Also it gave me great insight into Los Angeles taco culture.

Kristin: It was very fun. My biggest takeaway was that there was a callout to Brittani in the upcoming season of OITNB, and also that there were so many ants on the logs that we used as seating. Ants on a log as a snack is real cute ‘til you see lots of monster ants on an actual log. NOT SO CUTE.

Yvonne: I was right! The whole talk was hilarious and also very insightful into how TV works and also weirdly inspiring about writing and pursuing your dreams. I was most fascinated by Brittani and Lauren’s friendship and their preferred tacos in LA.

Brittani: Hannah Trees described the talk as “us trying to out-embarrass each other” which is fairly accurate. I spilled my drink no less than three times and I blushed no less than five.

Morgan McCormick, Sea Otters Counselor: I had given my Sex and Videogames seminar the week before with San Francisco Sex Information at the Center for Sex and Culture and it was really splendid to give it again. Everyone had super neat questions and was kind enough to put up with my health problems that meant I had to stop an hour and fifteen minutes in and just sit and drink water until the room stopped spinning on its axis. Cut that out, room. No time for your tomfoolery.

Morgan: People came up to me a lot over the week telling me how much they enjoyed it (the talk, not my dizzy spell) and considering how niche a subject it is that is a really fucking swell thing to hear.

Mey Rude, Trans Editor & Hogwarts Counselor: I’m kinda terrible at crafts, but I always end up helping people with their craft workshops (and often leading my own, but more on that later) and so this time, I found myself helping out Whitney with the Gender Pronoun crafts. These were a resounding success.

Carmen: After this block, everyone was wearing these gender pronoun crafts and I was just so jealous I didn’t have one. Next time, I am going to Gender Pronoun Crafts.

Mey: Anna Bongiovanni skipped right over the traditional pronouns, and even over non-traditional ones, and just made perler beads that spelled out “Anal.” Right on. Also, CJ made a really great “B’Day Boi” pin, because apparently in England people wear birthday pins? It ended up looking really great.

Morgan: Taylor Hatmaker, radiant dove of wonder, asked me if I would be willing to join Liz, Heather, Gabby and her on the Feels Academy/Mental Health Panel. I had never talked about my brain things in front of a group of people before, really I had only ever talked about it to partners and very very close humans. I wasn’t sure I was ready. I might as well have been at Waffle House I was waffling so hard.

Rory Midhani, Illustrator & Rodeo Disco Counselor: I liked The Feels Academy. It was impressive to see Morgan, Heather, Liz, Taylor and Gabby talking about difficult things so openly. I took the drawing of this out of my sketchbook and pinned it on my wall cos I don’t wanna forget their strength.

Morgan: I mean, wow, Heather and Liz just sat and talked with me for a goodly while helping me to parse out my thoughts into something I could share and I decided to just go for it. I said things I’d never had the courage to open up about before and I got such ample hugs and thank yous for it. More than anything though I feel a special kinship now with my fellow Feels Academics, a sense of community about a part of me I wasn’t sure I’d find community for and so I didn’t even know what I wanted it to look like. It looked like the five of us, and it looked like all of y’all in the audience. Thank you for helping me unshoulder an old burden.

Chelsey Petty, Editorial Assistant & Blackhearts Counselor: We held a Bee workshop in the afternoon and it was so, so cool! There were about six attendees and they broke into groups and each tackled a section and we created the coolest community newspaper for weirdos together! It was such a cool and quiet moment just watching everyone dive into their assignments and create something great. I was so glad to be in the presence of everyone who attended.

Gigler: The campers who came out for Celebrity Dance Grooves were a stone cold crew of babes, and though I can’t accurately describe the magic, I don’t need to because in a few days there was gonna be a video of you guys killin it at the state fair!

Gigler: So now every time I hear Feelin Myself I start doing Kaylah’s choreography, which I suspect has resulted in some absurd security footage at my storage unit last week.

Laura M: I was so nervous about Sciencey Bar Tricks! Megan was super patient with all my setup needs, including asking the kitchen last-minute for toothpicks I didn’t end up using. I think the activity went okay? Honestly it’s not always easy to tell when you’re leading the workshop. It was really cute watching some of the teams get super into figuring out the tricks.

Nikki Smaga, Intern: I was Megan’s helper in the afternoon. It was actually a lot of fun. I really like helping and I have background in event coordinating. I have not worn that hat in a while so it was nice to learn how easily I can slide back into that role. I tried to be helpful but not overly helpful. Sometimes it is more stressful having someone keep coming to you asking, WHAT CAN I HELP YOU WITH? I tried to be overly watchful and read body language for moments when I could jump in. That sounded a lot more creepy than I had intended…… I also wore a shirt I made that said: AUTO RAD INTERN, so there’s that.

Megan: Why didn’t I think to make a shirt? Next camp, I’m making a shirt.

Bren: Sidenote: After seeing how much work it all is, I can’t believe Megan used to do all this pretty much on her own. What a superhero.

The Sing-A-Long Campfire

Marni Kellison, A-Camp Co-Director: Last camp we had assigned a few staff members to run the singalong campfire but this time it was just by and for the people, and when I walked by and heard a crowd of 50 strong singing Wagon Wheel my heart swelled three sizes.

Carmen: I stumbled into the sing-a-long campfire by accident. It was too adorable not to stay. Like, what if that was how I woke up every morning, to your beautiful voices singing to me lightly in the wind?

Laura M: Um, did you all know that Intern Chloe is a total babe who has the voice of an angel? I did not. Until this campfire.

Gigler: It was so damn endearing and idyllic it was like stepping into another dimension. a queer eutopic acoustic alternate dimension.

Laura M: You guys, everyone at A-Camp has such a wide breadth of unexpected talents. I am never not blown away when I realize how terrifying good at everything everyone is.

Laura W: After dinner, the Sea Otters met up at the picnic tables outside Eagle to talk about our day. Everyone was starting to warm up to each other and to camp, and it was the first time I really got to talk to my campers and started to fall in love with them. Halfway through our talk, Rosemary starting singing and we all went “WOAH” and then totally had trouble regrouping because have you ever heard Rosemary sing?

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Music Night: Julia Nunes, Jenny Owen Youngs & Mal Blum,  hosted by Jasika Nicole

Riese: This was actually the first time in A-Camp history that we had enough amazing musical acts to create an entire Music Night — previously, we’d just fit musical acts in with a Variety Show or paired single musicians with the A-Camp Family Band. So we were pretty excited about this situation.

Whitney: Oh man, I was so excited for music night. Jenny, Mal and Julia are the perfect group of musically inclined humans.

Kristin: UGH goddammit I love Mal and Jenny and Julia so very much.

Mey: We really had such amazing talent this year. First of all, Jasika Nicole, apart from putting on what seemed like really incredible workshops and being just a stupendous person to talk to, was the perfect hostess for this opening night of music.

Jenny: Jasika SLAYED leading an a cappella Disney sing-a-long (a pastime near and dear to my heart).

Mey: It was amazing seeing Jasika sing “A Whole New World.” And she wasn’t even one of the actual musical acts!

Dannielle: This was the coolest. I love Mal so much. I love Jenny so much. I am deeply involved with Julia in a love way. So it was the perfect show for me.

Mey: Mal Blum went up first, and right off the bat I started crying when they played their super terrific, slowed down version of Bruce Springsteen’s “Dancing in the Dark,” about which Mal made the great point that a lot of Springsteen songs are really sad if you take out the sax.

Laura M: That cover broke my heart and stitched it back together again. I love their vulnerable, ragged, hopeful, lovely voice.

Stef: I had really hoped that “Dancing in the Dark” would be upbeat enough for us to yank Kip and Monique on stage and make them reenact Bruce and Courteney Cox, but the stripped-bare version was a lot more interesting.

Elicia: Also, unpopular opinion, I’m not a big fan of Bruce Springsteen and yet still, that “Dancing in the Dark” cover??? JESUS. It made my heart feel things. Seriously. Mal forever.

Jenny: I loooooved it.

Gabby: Mal Blum is a national treasure with international style and grace. Mal Blum is a heartbreaker, a rumpshaker, and an all around swell sort of guitar playing icon/mascot.

Jenny: Mal was perfect and adorable.

Stef: A couple of days before camp, Mal sent me a new song off their new record and asked Alex and me if we’d play it with them. Guys, Mal’s new record was produced by Marissa Paternoster from the Screaming Females and it sounds so fucking good. Little Alex was so happy to muppet out on the huge noise breakdown at the end of “Cool Party” and it was an honour to be a part of it.

Elicia: I got to listen to Alex practice drum parts without drums in our cabin to Mal’s song ‘Cool Party’ which I already loved from that small sampling, so I was really happy to see it performed live.

Mey: I also really loved that new song and I really loved watching Stef play bass while wearing her vampire cape.

Stef: Obviously, I needed to perform in my cape, which made me feel like a goth superhero.

Brittani: Mal is still perfect and charming.

Kristin: Every time Mal plays the Valentine’s Day song I lose my shit bc I love it and I love them so much.

Mey: I’ve listened to Jenny Owens Young before, and I thought I liked her music, but jeez, hearing it live was a totally new experience. Like, when she and Mal performed “Fuck Was I” together it was like hearing the song for the first time. It was a life-changing experience.

Stef: I feel like every time I break up with someone, some jerk always recommends that I listen to “Fuck Was I” and I always ignore them because I categorically reject feelings-y acoustic lesbian ballads (Yes, Autostraddle, it is I, your music editor). Then Jenny played it on the mountain and I almost wept. Alright, you guys win, but just this once.

Whitney: “Fuck Was I” was so, so good and super nostalgic, since I used to listen to it non-stop when I was younger (and play the song on my guitar in my dorm room in college, reminiscing about queer things). Mal is the perfect harmonizer.

Chelsey: One of my favorite moments of camp was sitting next to Rachel as Jenny sang “Clean Break.” Before she started, Jenny mentioned the song was based of an X-Files song and Rachel lost it in the cutest way possible and her face was so delighted the entire time. It was truly magic.

Jenny: I heard that I made Rachel cry a single tear when I announced that one song was influenced by an episode of The X-Files, which makes me insanely happy.

Brittani: When Jenny started to talk about X-Files, my head immediately turned to Rachel just in time to see her wipe away one perfect tear. Clearly she was #deeplymoved.

Whitney: Jenny’s performance of “Not On Your Own,” (which is on The Gayest Compilation Ever, Volume 2) brought me to so many tears during the night. The message is so, so important: “You might be amazed / to find you’re surrounded / by people whose hearts are standing wide open … You’re not on your own.” Everyone should listen to the song on Bandcamp and cry along with me. I’ll bring the tissues. It’ll be a feels party.

Brittani: Jenny dedicated her set to me and I texted several people about it… after the performance of course, I’m at least SORT OF cool.

Stef: Can we talk about how cute Jasika was operating the smoke machine? At the most ridiculous times, the stage would fill up with badass smoke and there was Jasika, hovering over the smoke machine backstage and grinning ear-to-ear. I want her around to create ambiance for all moments in my day-to-day life.

Alex Vega, Design Director: Jasika operated the fog machine like a BOSS.

Brittani: Jasika should never be left near a smoke machine.

Jenny: Y’ALL I HAD THE MOST FUN AT THIS SHOW! I played a bunch of songs which was A DELIGHT. Mal sang a song with me about making bad decisions…

…Julia sang a song with me about not being alone…

… and Dannielle and Kristin joined me on vocals and iPhone piano (it’s fine) for an adaptation of “Talk Dirty.”

Elicia: That “Talk Dirty” cover and the hilarious pre-empt description by Danielle? These things were all magic, basically. Beautiful, beautiful magic.

Alex: The highlight for me was Kristin attempting to use this iPhone instrument app during the acoustic-with-feelings cover of “Talk Dirty.” Ugh the best.

Laneia: Y’all! This night was BEAUTIFUL. I wasn’t ready for anyone on that stage, nothing, not a lick of it. Mal and Jenny were fucking transcendent and I tried to be so chill about their performances, but eventually realized that was impossible. And by the time Julia got up there, I was exhausted from holding in all my feelings, so then I cried.

Whitney: Julia’s performance of “That’s Pretty Gay” was absolutely lovely.

Heather: I’d never seen Julia perform live before. Holy cats! Her knee was completely broken and it was quite a hike from her cabin to that stage, and there was so much going on that day. I don’t know, I expected her to be spent already, just from participating at camp, but no, y’all. She got on that stage and opened herself up and gave and gave and gave all the love and wisdom and hard-won hope of her music to everyone in the crowd.

Brittani: Julia has the best performance face either side of the mountain.

Heather: I’ve always felt like Julia was inviting everyone else to heal in the warmth and empathy and experiences, and that soul-balm feeling was magnified even more on the mountain. It was a spiritual experience, to be honest. I sure did cry.

Yvonne: I wasn’t familiar with Julia’s music before she performed in the opening ceremony. I loved her rendition of Blank Space and genuinely felt like crying when she and Jenny sang With a Little Help From My Friends. But on music night, when she took the stage to perform her own stuff, she was phenomenal!

Riese: If I may time travel a bit for a minute… I loved seeing in the months after camp as Julia’s amazing new album debuted how many new Julia Nunes fans got born that night!

Jenny: Julia played many beautiful songs, finishing with a cover of “Genie in a Bottle” for which I donned a bear suit.

Lizz R.: I thought that when Jenny was saying “I’m a genie in a bear suit baby” she was saying “I’m a Jenny in a bear suit baby” which would have also been amazing. Jenny told me she’d like us all to pretend that’s what actually happened.

Jenny: I’M A JENNY IN A BEAR SUIT BABY.

Whitney: Just imagine Jenny Owen Youngs in a bear suit singing “I’m a genie in a bear suit baby / Gotta rub me the right way honey.”

Robin Roemer, Photographer & A-Camp Co-Director: Music Night was so incredible. I really can’t say enough things about how incredible all of our talent was this year. HOW INCREDIBLE WERE THEY? Am I saying incredible too much? Not only are they killer musicians (and comedians and actresses and writers), but they are also all such good people. Just sweet and cute and fun and wonderful.

Whitney: Each of their acts were so heartfelt and well done and at times pretty hilarious.

Alex Vega, Design Director: I just couldn’t believe how lucky we were to have such talented fools on this mountain with us. Mal, Jenny, and Julia all killed it.

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Opening Night of Klub Deer

Carmen: Opening night of Klub Deer, as usual, was the best.

Kai: Klub Deer got real in #slutshuck as soon as Carmen started assembling some sort of paper deer head. Rory supplied #slutshack with the best tatts ever, which maybe we should consider getting FOR REAL, and we stepped out into the night.

Carmen: I arrived super early with the dance crew, and we were all tatted and ready to go.

Stef: I didn’t feel like I was really truly home until Klub Deer opened and I was dancing inappropriately with all my friends.

Cee: Klub Deer was really professional on the opening night – complete with custom projected visuals courtesy of Rory, an excellent DJ set from the world famous Carlyton, and our top notch dance crew.

Brittani: The production value of Klub Deer this year went up several notches due in large part to Rory’s animations.

Gigler: They were out of this world.

KaeLyn: I spent 10 minutes just watching them in the corner by myself.

Carly: They were NEXT LEVEL.

Carmen: I don’t think I stepped off my “platform” (the mantle of the fireplace) the entire night, and I super dug DJ Carlytron’s tunes.

Carly: I played a set I like to call old stuff.

KaeLyn: I was mostly sober and having the time of my life. What if every club was like Klub Deer? What if there were no cis men and no straight people? What if everyone was beautiful inside and out? WHAT THEN?!

Marni: Robin and I showed up in animal onesies and flanked Carly at the DJ booth for a minute. I was a shark.

Carly: Robin came and danced in a dinosaur costume and it made me so happy because 1) we don’t really see each other much at camp and 2) she doesn’t get to party very much at camp, so seeing my beautiful, hard-working wife dancing in a dinosaur onesie really made my night.

Kai: All I know is at some point I was outside, then Ginuwine’s “Pony” came on, and I was inside. Great night.

Gabby: Because my lady love, Laura Wooley, was off with Morgan being amazing and helping take care of a sick camper, I had a weird Klub Deer night. I thought she was mad at me and got all L Word on some shit. I ended up at the smoker’s circle talking to Elicia all like “Dude what did I do? Why did my girlfriend disappear? Is it cuz I worked my booty on someone? Or do I smell?” And Elicia offered me a smoke and was like “Dude, it’s fucking ok. She’s probably meditating in the woods or something. She’s not mad at you” and I was still sad and then Morgan found me. Morgan brought good tidings of sick campers and a girlfriend who was just doing her job and who missed me. So then I went back to Klub Deer and booty whomped with everyone.

Jenny: HOLY HELL Klub Deer rules! Kristin and I danced largely with Mal and Brittani, who grew increasingly disgusted each time I didn’t know a Danity Kane or Pussycat Dolls song.

Lizz R.: The most important thing that happened at Klub deer was that I taught Jenny my secret “I don’t know this song” dance move. I also didn’t know any Pussycat Dolls. Basically the move goes that you just bend your elbows down 90 degrees and pump your fists to the sky over and over again.

Carly: How is it possible to not know any Pussycat Dolls songs??

KaeLyn: I danced and tried not to look awkward, but also just generally didn’t care what I looked like.

Elicia: I had the most fun dancing with Rachel and Mey and KaeLyn and more. I think I may have even taken my jacket off at some point? It was arms out kind of jams. I also think this was the night I depleted my personal stash of cigarettes. How young and naive I was then.

Kaelyn: Elicia is the cutest. This is when my friend crush on Elicia really came on strong. Just such a babe dancing in her jean jacket, sipping her drink, shimmying her shoulders.

Alex: I did it! I made it to Klub Deer before falling asleep! I danced my ass off for approximately 45 minutes cause Carly was DJing the hell out of that unit, then promptly put myself to bed. Go hard or go home, y’all.

Carly: Shoutout to Brittani for empowering me to play Limp Bizkit at A-Camp and a big fuck you to everyone who stopped dancing during Neutron Dance. How dare you shade the Pointer Sisters like that?!

Carolyn W: I partied, I screamed, I lost my dance partner. Next thing I knew I was waking up *blank stare* And the evening and the morning were the fourth day.

Stef: DJ Carlytron slayed all night, and when it was finally time to pack up and head back to my cabin, I wrapped my cape around me like bat wings and absconded into the night.

Gigler: I’d like to thank everyone I danced with at camp for all your spirit, booty, skill, and mutual respect.

Carmen: Also, to everyone who unknowingly received a shot glass full of Coors which I said was hard liquor and took it as if it really was: I saw you.

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Meanwhile in the VIP Cabin…

Dannielle: We fell asleep, only to be awakened by terror screams bc there was a black widow on Kristin’s bed.

Kristin: NO. NO. NO ONE HAS ANY IDEA. Actually, Kip and Taylor might have an idea bc rumor has it they had a Black Widow in their room but the thing is this was NOT a black widow it was like four times the SIZE of a black widow and it was on the wall next to my bed (Jenny & I slept in bunk beds, it was the best, I hate sharing a bed) and I found it during my nightly iPhone-light bug-search. USUALLY I am the bug-capturer of the family but YOU GUYS YOU HAVE NO IDEA IT WAS SO BIG. So, I turned to Jenny and scream-whispered, YOU NEED TO GO GET HELP, and she turned on all the lights even though Julia and Dannielle were sleeping and then she went outside and thank christ Abby was there and Abby came in and was like, “I’ll catch it no worries,” and then she SAW IT and was like FUCK THIS THAT THING IS HUGE IT NEEDS A SHOE. I want to remind everyone that Abby is, like, a farmer and she isn’t afraid of bugs and she made me tell her over and over again it was just a cricket bc she was AFRAID BC THIS FUCKING SPIDER YOU GUYS HAVE NO IDEA.

Riese: I just want to state for the record that I am 100% of the time the bug-capturer of our family, so I think Abby’s apparent bug-killing chivalry on this night really is a testament to how the A-Camp spirit really pushes people to be their absolute best selves.

Kristin: She had to kill it with her shoe (#rip) and then kill it more with Julia’s crutch (*gag noises*) and then I made Jenny sleep with me in the twin bottom bunk bc fuck that I am not sleeping alone when spiders can be that big. Ugh.

Jenny: THANKS ABBY

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Meanwhile In The Staff Cabins…

KaeLyn: I need to talk about the phantom door in staff cabin 19. It needs to be talked about. Somewhere around 3am-ish, Maddie peeked down from the top bunk and was like, “Is there a door?” Because the loud side of cabin 19 was being loud and we loved them and wanted them to scream cackle all night long if they wanted to but also sleep was a thing. And there was a door, but it didn’t…open…and it was off the hinges. I went back to sleep but I guess Maddie went over there and nicely asked them all to hush.

Cecelia: Seriously where did the door come from?

KaeLyn: Well, in the a.m. circa 6am, I awoke to see that someone had put the door on. Sometime in the dead of the night, the door was mysteriously put up without waking anyone up and because everyone on that side of the cabin was tipsy, no one remembered doing it. Thus it was like magic. We couldn’t stop talking about it all day—the magic door incident of May 31st, 2015. For the record, we all love the loud side of cabin 19; all members of #sleepcrew love you dearly.

Laura M.: Seconded. Carmen, I love you to the ends of the earth, but your voice also carries approximately that far, even when you’re trying to be quiet. I deeply appreciated that you all drunkenly put up the door that night… and that it kept happening every night after.

Kaylah: One night in the #slutshack Rory and Gigler put up the missing door that separated the two sides of our cabin. I thought they were being loud as fuck, but no one from the other side woke up. The morning after I hear Nurse Viv flipping out about the door magically appearing.

A-Camp 6.0, Day Three: Monday, June 1st

Morning Activities

Pre-Breakfast: Coffee & Dream Diaries (Morgan)// Diarist’s Hike (Ali & Hansen)

Block A: Self Defense 101 (Laura M) // Quilting (Jasika Nicole) // Working In Solidarity: Combating Transphobia In Queer Spaces (Mey, Morgan, Maddie & KaeLyn) // Chosen Family Panel (Mary, Grace, Taylor, Whitney & Kristin) // Changing the Narrative: The Importance of QPOC Fiction (Carolyn W) // This Is A Queer Desire Map Circle (Carmen & Rachel)

Block B: Write Your Face Off #2 (Rachel, Riese & Laneia) // Bicycle Repair and Maintenance 101 (Heather) // Anal Sex: A Gentle Introduction (Ali, Lizz Rubin, KaeLyn, Carolyn Yates) // Basketball Wives of Angelus Oaks (Brittani, Carly, Claire) // SuperPhat Soap-Making (Laura Wooley & Mey) // Lip-Syncing Essentials with Kristin & Dannielle (Kristin & Dannielle)

Sarah Hansen, Fun Home Counselor: Ali and I lead a Diarist’s Hike in the morning, and we had tried the hike twice before, once getting so completely lost I made a cairn for us because I was convinced we were going to die alone in the woods. But! We pulled it off when it came to the actual day and the trip to the Medicine Wheel was a success.

Ali Osworth, Star Runners Counselor: Oh gosh, the Diarist’s hike might have been my favorite quiet moment at Camp.

Hansen: Taking a quiet moment is so necessary for camp and I rarely allow myself to do it, so it was a nice reset.

Ali: It was exactly what I needed — I brought my tarot cards and read for myself on a rock overlooking the mountains and then I wrote about it. Fun fact, every prompt I wrote for the hike was based off of tarot cards I pulled out of my deck.

Laura Mandanas, Outsiders Counselor: During Self-Defense 101, Marni and Robin helped out by posing as attackers in their bear suits. It was very special.

Marni Kellison, A-Camp Co-Director: Robin and I assisted Laura M with her self-defense workshop as the aggressor-bears. Speaking as a bear, it was really fun and informative and Laura is a great teacher.

Laura M: I wish we got through more material this year, but I’m happy that everyone who attended knows how to throw a proper punch!

Carolyn Yates, Fun Home Counselor: Our Anal Sex: A Gentle Introduction workshop (or as it will live in our hearts, “Butts: I’m A Cheerleader”) was, I think, mostly an excuse to talk about anal sex a lot, a goal that we definitely achieved.

KaeLyn Rich, Shark Week Counselor: At the Butt Sex panel, I was again just like, “Wow, these humans let me stand up here with them. WHAT A DAY.” Lizz is hilarious. Carolyn is a boss bitch. Ali is the tops in so many ways.

Lizz Rubin, Witchblades Counselor: Once upon a time I had this insane idea that we would talk all about anal sex for an hour. And then we did that. We just did it. We talked about anal for a hour with campers. We talked all about safety and lube and going slow. We talked about poop and toys and condoms. It was incredible.

Ali: Butt sex. Lizz, did that harness ever make its way back to you?

Lizz: We did find the harness with the peep hole back!

Carolyn Y: There isn’t a ton of discussion about anal sex among queer women and so helping to create an environment where it was the focus felt really good.

KaeLyn: We packed that room (insert packing joke. insert fudge packing joke.) full of anal-sex novices and experts! We had to add chairs! I hope lives were changed.

Carmen Rios, Rodeo Disco Counselor: While everyone else was talking about butt sex, I was wrangling a surprisingly large amount of A-Campers into a bench circle to help them map out the rest of their lives as per The Desire Map, that self-improvement book I talk to you about on a daily basis.

Emily Gigler, Superstar: Carmen’s desire map circle was a goddamn revelation. A precious cluster of friends and community sitting in the forest focusing on how we want to feel, and how we can create those feelings and experiences for ourselves in daily life. That shit is mad applicable, that’s that shit you take home with you.

Carmen: We laughed, we forged friendships, Rachel learned a lot about me by looking over my shoulder at my completed copy of the workbook, but nobody cried — even though I apparently requested not one, but two boxes of tissues for the activity.

Rachel Kincaid, Ghost Power Counselor: The boxes of tissues were actually, I think, the only materials that Carmen had requested for the activity, and we had to send someone to find pens. Nonetheless, it was a joyous time! I was so pleased by how many people were willing to spend an hour or so Finding Their Truth (TM) in a little campfire grove, and Carmen’s Desire Map passion was infectious.

Gigler: The collective energy of all of our ideas and ambitions bouncing around with each other is transformative.

Maddie Taterka, Firebirds Counselor: I felt really honored when Mey asked me to be part of Combating Transphobia in Queer Spaces, and I really loved this discussion.

Mey Rude, Hogwarts Counselor: It was funny, because right before Morgan, Maddie, KaeLyn and I went to start our Combating Transphobia in Queer Spaces workshop, Caitlyn Jenner made her debut online, so at the beginning of the workshop, I joked that we were changing the topic to just talking about Jenner.

Maddie: I appreciated how open and honest people were about sharing their experiences and thoughts, and I think that in the space we were able to capture how making queer women’s spaces safe and inclusive of trans women is a nuanced and ongoing process, not a singular set of hard and fast rules.

Morgan McCormick, Sea Otters Counselor: I was super glad Mey was our leader because I frequently felt at a loss before camp in our email thread about what to say and she kept us on task with frequent polite check-ins and guidance as we tried to to hammer out an issue that the world struggles so mightily with.

Mey: This was my first time leading a workshop like this, I had been a part of a ton of panels and I had led a craft, but I felt so much pressure on this one. Luckily, I had a really great team helping me with it. Also, all the campers (and staff members) who came did such a great job, I was really proud of the list we came up with, and really happy that we were able to talk about the kinds of issues that we, as trans women, still have, even in queer spaces that say they’re really trans friendly.

Kaelyn: We were nervous cis allies wouldn’t come, but you all came! And were present! And sat back and listened to trans folks tell you what they need! It made my heart sing. My favorite part is that Maddie grabbed the notes and brought them over to Wolf after the session, where they lived for all to see for the rest of camp!

Morgan: After combating transphobia like champs, I really felt like we had done some real good. And activism often lends one to feel that good feelings and a sense of actual accomplishments are nowhere near in sight. It was a real gift and a treasure to be there.

KaeLyn: It was my favorite workshop of camp and a huge honor to be asked to stand up there as a trans ally. I just felt appreciative to be in both the workshops I was assigned to in the morning. Like, surrounded by so much greatness, just glad to be invited to the party.Mey, Morgan, Maddie, and I led some great conversations about making queer spaces trans-inclusive.

Stef Schwartz, Campires Counselor: It was so hard to pick which thing to go to at any given time! I really wanted to attend Chosen Family and the butt stuff, but I ultimately decided that the workshop about combating transphobia in queer spaces was where I really needed to be. I’m really glad I did! Mey, Morgan, KaeLyn and Maddie led a really amazing discussion and I was happy to just shut up and listen.

Laura Wooley, Sea Otters Counselor: It was just wildly successful. Have you all read the article they wrote? I should really be required reading for all queers/feminists/humans.

Liz Castle, Tower of Terror Counselor: The Chosen Family Panel was AMAZING. Thanks to all of you who shared your stories…I’m pretty sure there was not a dry eye in Eagle by the time it was over!

Whitney Pow, Star Runners Counselor: I was so proud to share my (sometimes sad, often bittersweet, sometimes happy) story about my family alongside all of these wonderful, articulate and incredibly brave people.

Whitney: We had some wonderful conversations and questions with campers, about how to self-care and move through situations where we need to find our chosen family, and I just wanted to say I love you all so much, and we’re all here for each other, and you are my chosen family. I feel so lucky to have this queer community through Autostraddle.

Carly Usdin, Special Programming Director: I sat in on the chosen family panel and my adult children, Grace and Taylor, made me cry a thousand tears. I’m a proud mom.

Laura W: SuperPhat Soap Making was so fun that Mey and I forgot to tell everyone why it was called superphat! See, after spending 15 minutes terrifying everyone about lye, I realized that we didn’t have a bucket anymore due to the Great Plague of 2015. We decided to improvise with a plastic hot chocolate container and got to play a real serious game of “do as I say, not as I do” when it totally melted as soon as we poured the lye into it. After a little crisis management, we ended up with some really smooth soap batter. A camper asked if she could add glitter to her soap (obviously the answer to this question is “yes!”) and everyone got really creative with foam letters, ribbon, tea, and lots and lots of glitter.

Djuan Trent, Beyhive Counselor: I helped Megan set up off activities and then I was off to sit on a tree stump and you know… sit on a tree stump. Anywho, I was sitting on a tree stump going over the lyrics to my songs when one of my campers, Aleia, approached me. She sat with me and we just started chatting about life and such. I really enjoyed chatting with her because I love to hear and tell stories. I told her that I once heard a quote on Grey’s Anatomy which really stuck with me, “You never know what secrets the body in front of you holds.” I love stories because we all have one, and through our stories are how we share and relate some of those secrets. Isn’t it so amazing to think that the people you work with, sleep with, drink with and randomly pass in the street have secrets and stories to tell?! Like…that is just one of my favorite things to think about. But anywho, Aleia and I were chatting and relating about our lives as queer women in the world, our families, our siblings and our careers. I’d shared with Aleia that I was enjoying camp, but I was feeling under-used and just lacking purpose… like, I was just waiting to have my “moment” when I would finally be like, “Oh! This is why I’m here!” I told Aleia that I’d decided that maybe my purpose at camp was not to have a big moment, but to just exist and enjoy the experience rather than looking for my “moment.” Aleia understand and reassured me that I was serving a purpose at camp. I appreciated all parts of our conversation. Eventually Ev’Yan joined us and the chat was just getting better and better. At some point, Aleia was asking Ev’Yan about some natural remedies for something and Ev’Yan responded, “Well, I don’t know that much. I just do little stuff here and there.” I stopped Ev’Yan right there and asked her, “Why does it have to be ‘just little stuff’? Aleia may not know anything, so even though you feel like you only know a little, it could be a lot more than what Aleia knows. We have to stop selling ourselves short and shrinking ourselves down to what we ‘just’ are.” And there it was… MY MOMENT! Mica joined and Stephanie joined us as we were talking about the importance of embracing who we are, as little or big as we may feel, and standing firm in this. So often, we cower down to thinking/feeling that we are “just” something, rather than embracing everything that we actually are. Changing “I’m just” to “I am” can seem like it is only a slight change in words, but it is actually a big change in perception, self-perception. And in that moment, I realized I had to stop saying, “I’m just here at camp, I guess” and start saying, “I am here at camp, shawty!!!” That conversation with my campers was much needed and I loved the dynamic of us nurturing, sharing and planting seeds in one another.

Kristin Russo, The Talent: This Lip-Syncing Workshop was a total unknown to us… it’s like, we LIPSYNC all the time, and the dream of our life was to teach a class on how to do it, but we had no idea what that would mean.

Dannielle Owens-Reid, The Talent: We taught the best workshop on planet earth. The happiest day of my life.

Yvonne, Senior Editor and Shark Week Counselor: I don’t remember why but I stumbled upon the lip synching workshop and then just stayed for the majority of it because it was super fun. I didn’t participate but everyone involved looked so good doing it. Dannielle and Kirsten are legit f*cking pro lip synching coaches. Y’all should hire them.

Kristin: We chose Fifth Harmony’s “Bo$$” as the song we’d use to instruct, and also decided that it would be good to direct the attendees in a full-out performance that they could do at the end of camp. We planned a few key parts of the performance, but otherwise left it entirely up to the group. We split everyone up into sections (Fifth Harmony, Horns, “Snappers,” Hype-men, and the letters to spell out C-O-N-F-I-D-E-N-T) and then discovered we were at a camp full of absolute geniuses as they made their parts INCREDIBLE. We instructed them to meet on their own to practice before the big performance…

Carolyn Wysinger, Firebirds Counselor: At my workshop Breaking the Narrative: The Importance of QPOC literature, we had some amazing discussions about the role of media and literature in telling QPOC stories. The best part was letting the campers work on a few writing prompts an hearing them tell their stories. I was glad that the workshop really drove home the idea of tell your individual stories and the ones they shared were amazing! I was so happy to have been able to inspire them to share. More tears.

Brittani Nichols, Tower of Terror Counselor: Basketball Wives of Angelus Oaks was fun as always. Things were definitely more competitive this year than usual. I think some people were even talking trash to each other? It was definitely better than the basketball scene in The L Word.

Carly: It was definitely better than that scene in The L Word. I love watching Claire do anything, especially sports.

Elicia Sanchez, Ghost Power Counselor: I heard a lot of amazing activities happened which I missed out on because I went back to my cabin after breakfast and took a nap.

Rachel: My intrepid authors showed up to Day 2 of the multi-part Writing Your Face Off workshop, which featured guest stars Riese and Laneia. I was so pumped that everyone who had attended the first day came back for the second, when they could be LIP SYNCING, even. Riese and Laneia led an activity where people used a nontraditional writing form — in this case I believe it was a lab report format — to cover a personal essay topic and talk about a life experience they’d had. People seemed really game for it despite it being kind of a gonzo idea!

Riese Bernard, Runaways Counselor: It actually really helped me outline an essay I’ve been kicking around in my head for a while.

Laneia, Runaways Counselor: Same! Rachel’s writing workshops are the tits. If you’re lucky enough to find yourself at A-Camp and you’re even a little bit into excavating your soul onto some paper, do not miss this.

Heather Hogan, Hogwarts Counselor: So, I had an enormous UPS debacle leading up to camp, and it left me without a lot of things, including a bike to use in my bike maintenance workshop. Luckily, Kip saved the day and brought his bike up to the mountain for me to use. I worked in a bike shop in college for store credit, so I’ve been around the block about a hundred times assembling and fixing bike, but I was SO NERVOUS about doing this workshop. Luckily, everyone was patient and kind and I guess it went okay because when Evie volunteered to change a tire in front of the group at the end of class, she did it brilliantly on the first try. (Um, Jessica, I just remembered I still have your tire lever! I’ll mail it to you!)

Afternoon Activities

Mad Hatters T* Party // Pool Party (Kaylah, Gigler & Kai) // Canoeing (Marni & Kip) // Ropes Course // Make a F*cking ‘Zine (Riese, Laneia, Dannielle, Kristin & Chelsey) // Yarn Weaving (Jasika Nicole) // 8 Bits, Boss Keys and Belonging: Video Games, Identity and Community (Whitney, Laura M, Heather, Taylor, Bren, Morgan, Mey) // Queer Safer Sex 101 (Lizz Rubin & Carolyn)  // You Drew You (Cameron & Rory) // The Art of the Whiskey Sour (Ali & Alex)

Ali: Y’all, The Art of the Whiskey Sour was AMAZING. Instead of making a cocktail at the whiskey tasting this year, Alex Vega and I teamed up to do two different themed cocktail workshops this year and I would like to do this forever and ever. I was really nervous for it, actually. During pre-camp, I just sort of looked at Alex nervously and said, “but doesn’t everyone know everything we know?” I was so afraid that everyone would just stare at me like, okay, but tell us something new. But I had no reason to be nervous!

Ali: We had an absolute blast and Alex showed off her classic whiskey sour recipe with the egg white and everything and we taught everyone how to dry shake and garnish with bitters and we all got rip-roaring and it was AWESOME. I love seeing queermos move in on hobby-territory that’s generally reserved for straight cis men.

Alex Vega, Marketing & Design Director: I’m so happy I got to share my newfound love of this cocktail with some new people, especially the recipe with egg white because it’s such a rare thing to find at a bar and it is the best way, imho, to enjoy a sour. After the workshop, Ali and I got the cutest card in our pigeon hole from a camper who had attended the workshop to tell us how much she enjoyed it! I die.

Emily: I just want to say that it pained me emotionally to have to miss the canoe trip this year, it’s always one of my favorite camp moments. However to have to miss it for the pool party was about as good of a consolation prize as I could have.

Carmen: I am always at the Pool Party at A-Camp, not because it’s assigned to me but because we all know it wouldn’t be the same without me. Right before, I noticed I had a massive bug bite on my right thigh, which didn’t terrify me but terrified Nurse Viv, which instilled me with great shame and fear. To make up for it, I planned some Singled Out stuff with Stef while she treaded water and then hung out poolside, as I am wont to do at all times.

Stef: It’s worth noting that until this camp, I had never been in the pool. This camp, I decided to fight back against my dual phobias of sunlight and people seeing my body in a bathing suit, and went for a rousing swim among the moths. Thanks, Kai, for grabbing a net and fishing all my insect buddies out of the water.

Kai Keller, The Beach Counselor: Don’t be fooled. Scooping bugs out of a pool that size is a damn good workout.

Gigler: Kaylah and I didn’t have the emotional or physical time or resources to plan the pool party the way we did last year, but turns out all we really need is music and campers and it was such a chill afternoon. My highlights: Cleo dancing to Mz 007’s “Important”, Emily L’s Snorkel Barbie™ look, Gilles always being ready and willing to bust a move, Becca’s flower princess game, and every cutie out there enjoying the toastiest A-Camp on record.

Lizz Rubin, Witchblades Counselor: In the afternoon I did my annual Queer Safer Sex 101 talk. I think it went pretty spectacularly as usual.

Carolyn Yates, Fun Home Counselor: I had never been to Lizz’s Queer Safer Sex 101 before and helping out with it was a revelation.

Lizz: This year we got totally side tracked talking about HPV and then again talking about yeast and BV. Except I’m totally okay with getting side tracked because we have to go where the knowledge desire takes us, you know? I’m always so impressed by the number of campers who show up to the safer-sex talks. I think it just shows how much everyone actually cares about keeping each other safe.

Riese: I think it also speaks to how much everyone really likes hearing Lizz Rubin talk about sex.

Carolyn: In a world where most safer sex education is hetero- and cisnormative, hearing a sex educator discuss health concerns frankly and accessibly was a necessary delight that I wish we could somehow make mandatory.

Lizz: I really hope people learned something! Also I have to shout out to the Center for Sexual Pleasure and Health for loaning us toys to help make this possible!

Marni: Canoeing on Jenks Lake Pond is always one of my favorite moments at camp. My trusty bowman Kip was on hand, as usual, to lend his neckscart (aka legitimacy) to the event and help divvy up boats and get everybody a chance on the water.

Gabby Rivera, Beehive Counselor: When Laura W. asks me with her cute ass face to do something, generally I do it. So when she asked me to go canoeing with her, I said of course my sweet piece of corn on the cob. I will canoe! And in my head, I was like, da fuq? I’m from the Bronx. We don’t canoe. I can barely swim. I’m not even good in the rain. But I said ok, and then Trent was coming too, so of course, I had to be mad cool about everything.

Gabby: We get to the canoe spot and it’s beautiful. I helped mega stud, Marni, put a bunch of canoes on the water for everyone. Then it was our turn. Someone put me in the steering spot. Why for they did that?? I learned how to canoe in circles, canoe into the mud, canoe into the trees… it took about 25mins for me to get us moving in a forward motion.

Laura W: If you ever have the opportunity to be in a canoe with Gabrielle Rivera and Djuan Trent, you should jump on it. Gabby will steer you into every single tree and Trent will sing you songs and take selfies and you’ll get some vitamin D and decide that this has been one of the best afternoons of your life.

Trent: Listen Linda… are you listening? Okay, good. Have you ever felt like you were just going around in circles and hitting nothing but dead ends, while you watch everyone else effortlessly cruise off into the sun and open spaces without you??? Well, that’s what it was like being in a canoe with Laura and Gabby… and it was so great! Ha! Hitting dead ends and running into trees has never been so fun. This is what happens when you have Hot Laura, Gabby from the Bronx and Trent the Selfie Queen all in one canoe.

Gabby: At one point, Trent was like “can you stop looking angry and constipated? I’m trying to take a picture of you where you’re not grimacing.” Then I relaxed and literally had one of the most fun afternoons of my life. Canoeing is awesome.

Trent: My only regret was leaving my selfie stick in the car, but ya know…life happens, selfie sticks get left and the world just keeps on turning…and so does your canoe.

Marni: Watching Gabby, Trent and Laura’s canoe zigzag around the lake in and out of the weeds was the goddamn funniest thing I’d seen all week and I loved every minute of it.

Morgan: Our Gamer Circle was smashing. Everyone had such a wide array of experiences I found myself hunting down people afterwards to hear more from them. Also someone knew what Drakengard was which basically filled my heart to bursting. Love you, Emily. <3

Laura M: The gamer discussion was the first time I felt really relaxed about anything this camp. Large group discussions can be difficult, but this was such a fantastic assemblage of respectful, nerdy awesome humans! I really loved this panel.

Whitney: We had a wonderful gaming roundcircle and it was here that I got to meet Kayla, who is an internationally ranked Tetris player (and who can drop 3-ish Tetris blocks per second—PER SECOND you guys) and chat with Heather, who makes board games, card games and video games. We had a great time talking about gender in games, about making your own character in RPGs, and about queer games.

Heather: The gaming roundcircle was fantastic! Hogwarts’ camper Kayla is a world class (no, seriously, like ranked and everything) Tetris player, and after we were finished, she brought out her laptop and showed us her skills. It was unreal. I have never, ever seen anyone play a video game like that before. I’ve barely even read about it in books (and I’ve read a lot of nerdy books). I almost couldn’t even see the pieces they were moving so fast. I also really loved talking about people’s experiences with queering RPGs and gaming spaces. It made me feel really hopeful about the future of the community.

Bren Christolear, Fried Green Tomatoes Counselor: My one big camp regret is not seeing Kayla play Tetris.

KaeLyn: This was my first unscheduled block of camp thus far and what did I do? I took a nap-ish. I curled up in my bunk and closed my little eyes and didn’t even smear my makeup. Then I booked it over to Homo La Flor where my co-captain, Yvonne was looking so hot in her bedazzled and very authentic-looking Selena replica bra and hot pants. Sex on legs. That is all.

Yvonne: It was the 20th anniversary of Selena’s death this year and I wanted to do something special at camp. I was inspired to do a quote/sing/dance-along and trivia to the Selena movie!

Gabby: God that was so much fun. First of all, Yvonne was the hottest person on the mountain in her boistier – how do you spell boustiare? Bousti-caca? I don’t know. Anyway. We watched Selena with a crowd and we had microphones to talk shit over the movie.

Yvonne: Y’all, I made a bustier just like Selena’s because that’s how much I love Selena. I saw a how-to video on Youtube and it seemed easy enough. I knew I had to wear a bustier to my own event in order to properly honor La Reina de Tejano. I have big boobs so I knew it was gonna take some time to add all the shiny rhinestones. I think in total it took 10 hours to hot glue every single rhinestone on that black bra. I’m pretty sure Selena was very proud and smiling down upon me.

Elicia: La Flor was basically one of the best things that ever happened to me. I have never been in a room with so many queer peers that know who Selena is or love her music or care to hear my stories about our distant familial relationship.

Yvonne: God, Elicia and Stef made me laugh so much with their commentary! They were so good.

KaeLyn: I would like to watch every movie with Yvonne, Elicia, Gabby, Stef, and Mey providing commentary. And Grace turning down the volume for trivia and contests whenever mansplaining or boring romance shit was happening. And with Yvonne not wearing a shirt. This is what I wish for in the world.

Heather: Same, KaeLyn. Same. (The Selena afternoon was my hands down favorite part of camp.)

Stef: Homo La Flor was amazing for several reasons:

1) Yvonne’s incredible bustier, modeled after one of the ones Selena wears in the movie

2) Finding out Elicia is distantly related to Selena

3) The red team’s incredible knowledge of Selena trivia

4) “Poor Suzette,” a drinking game Gabby and I invented. The rules are simple: you take a drink every time Selena’s parents ignore their other children, because Selena is their only child who matters.

5) The dinner bell rang with about 20 minutes left in the movie, right around when Selena wins her Grammy. This meant that the major tragedy at the end of the film was cut out, so I got to announce, “And then Selena went on to have a long and prosperous career, thank you for joining us, goodnight!” Grace had never seen the movie, so the ending remains a total mystery for her. Nobody spoil it.

Elicia: Stef brought accidentally perfectly themed snacks of chips and salsa and dried mango slices with chili.

Gabby: Stef and Elicia made me cry cuz I was laughing so hard. And Mey is just the best person to sit next to at a movie and she always laughs at my stupid ass jokes. SELENAS ESTA AQUIIIIII.

Kaelyn: Heather Fucking Hogan literally danced for points for the yellow team. She is a better person than I.

Yvonne: Red team killed it during trivia. (Maybe because four of them were from Texas, ha!) Oh, and I made Heather Hogan dance with me for points and its was the greatest.

Elicia: Getting to do commentary over this movie with Yvonne (WHOSE BUSTIER WAS MUY AMAZING), Gabby, Stef and Mey was the greatest. People laughed. People danced. Selena didn’t die. It was awesome. #AnythingForSelenas #PoorSuzette

Riese: Make a F*cking Zine was, as always, a delightful time had by all! It ends up being almost its own Introvert Meet-Up, as sooner or later it becomes a room of queers cutting, taping, pasting, and writing to their hearts content, on the floors or at tables or wherever their heart leads them.

Laneia: Man, we keep trying to figure out how to create and also print zines in the time allotted and it’s just kind of impossible because we end up having too much damn fun making them and don’t stop long enough to, you know, compile and print them. But don’t worry! I still have all of the original pages and will be printing and mailing them to y’all very soon!

Kristin: I learned the definition of “Ephemera,” and also learned that you can buy bags of it on Etsy. Truthfully, although I did learn the word at A-Camp, I forgot it today while trying to write this re-camp… so just had to text Riese to find out what the hell you call those weird bags of cool weird shit for ‘zine making.

Riese: I LOVE EPHEMERA!

Kristin: Anyway, this was a super amazing workshop. We rolled out yoga mats and sat in a quiet, sun-free space with scissors and glue-sticks and stacks of magazines. It was the way life should always be. We should legit just always be collaging and making political ‘zines. Everyone else is doing it wrong.

Cameron, Outsiders Counselor: For You Drew You, we wanted campers to explore art as A Thing For Everyone and a basic form of self-expression instead of gilded frames stuck behind plate glass and signs that read “Please Stay Behind Line.” This was my first activity for camp. It felt like the first day of school and I was internally freaking out because what if nobody likes me or thinks I’m cool?? Meanwhile, Rory is just casually Rory-ing about and greeting people like a pro. Some of my Outsiders came—probably 50% to come to my activity and 50% because in a high school cafeteria they’d be the weird art kids/the greatest people you will ever meet. We did three drawing exercises: Exquisite Corpses, Tilted Self-portraits, and Favorite Moment of Camp So Far. I tried to participate in the first one, but had a hard time keeping time and drawing simultaneously. As it turned out, I was just bad at keeping time correctly. Thank you, campers, for not laughing at me too much while I struggled with my phone.

The Staff Reading

Lizz R.: Where do I begin with the reading. It was such an incredible opportunity to hear what amazing talented people who I know and love are writing, feeling, working on. All of it.

Whitney: Oh man, the Staff Reading was all tears and joy and tender hearts.

Carmen: I went first at the Staff Reading because Riese likes to keep me on my toes, I think. I always worry nobody will remember me if I go first and also my voice is always a little croaky and also the podium was on wheels which made it really hard for me to cling to it for dear life. But in the end, I got through my mushy love-fest for Geneva in one piece and even got a gesture of approval from Brittani Nichols, so I think it was all fine.

Gabby: I hope Carmen never runs out of material from her beautiful secret tumblr.

Kaelyn: Carmen’s piece was so deeply personal and the love and longing was just emanating through her words.

Gabby: Can Elicia host a “Bad High School Poetry” nite at every camp? Like where she just sits atop a stump wearing glasses and reading aloud from her old high school poetry books because that was one of the funniest things I’ve ever experienced. I laughed so hard, like Carmen, I literally cried. I think I even queefed. Which was good because almost everything else was super intense.

Mey: Elicia’s poems were AMAZING and made me cry more than I think I’ve ever cried from laughter.

Rachel: I just re-remembered Elicia’s reading and started choking laughing all over again. It was LIFE-CHANGING.

Kristin: Elicia was moved to the top of my “must be best friends with” list with her reading of her bad high school poetry.

Jenny: Elicia’s high school poetry was unbelievable and I will treasure it forever.

Whitney: Oh man, Elicia brought us back up when we were having all the feels—she so expertly read old poems adolescent-her wrote, and it brought to house into uproarious laughter. So, so, good for my heart.

Carly: Elicia’s reading had me falling off my chair several times. Elicia you are a national treasure.

Ali: Elicia KILLED ME DEAD. She was so funny.

Elicia: It was such a relief that people were accepting of my dumb poetry reading. I was so afraid it would be an odd note in the midst of some really heartfelt, beautifully written, powerful pieces. Like I said already too much, I’m not so good with feelings, so for me the only logical thing to do was to read a selection of poetry I wrote at 16 in a time when I was SURE I was THE BEST at expressing feelings, but I still sucked. Now at least I’ve accepted my inability to feel things normally, but more importantly, I no longer think I’m good at writing poetry which is really in everyone’s best interest. Also, shout out to my cabin-mate Alex for making me a really delicious whiskey sour cocktail before I headed to the staff reading which helped me to be a way-less ugly crier thanks to its face muscle numbing powers.

Ali: I am so happy Elicia read her high school masterpieces because then Whitney and Maddie read and I just about melted in a pool of my own tears. I would have legit become a water demon if Elicia hadn’t prepped us for the feels with the hilarious.

Jenny: Whitney’s reading shattered me into a thousand pieces and I basically silent-sobbed from the middle of her piece until the very end of the entire Staff Reading.

Cameron Glavin, Outsiders Counselor: I was accidentally on the schedule for the staff reading when I arrived at camp, which was bad for multiple reasons. 1) Public speaking is my worst enemy, 2) I knew what kind of talent was taking the stage from previous camps, 3) I knew that Whitney was going to make me cry and I am an ugly crier. Luckily, I did NOT have to do a staff reading, so everyone won. I sat with the Outsiders and Star Runners on the floor right up front. We laughed, we cried. It was great. Thanks for not making me read something I did not have.

Lizz: Whitney really touched me.

Maddie: I was fucking terrified to get up on that stage and read about my mom, but I am so glad I did. I felt so loved and seen by y’all in that space, and I don’t think I had any idea how much I needed that.

Carmen: I don’t always cry at the staff reading because I am an unfeeling bitch, but Maddie’s piece hit me right in the feels because things about moms always hit me right in the feels.

Riese: I’d decided not to read my Dead Dad essay ’cause I didn’t want to cry AND THEN MADDIE WENT AND READ HER DEAD MOM ESSAY AND I HAD TO CRY.

Maddie: I also loved every single word read by my fellow-readers, and I especially appreciate Whitney going before me so I could get the tears flowing. That night made me understand A-Camp, and even Autostraddle, in a newer and deeper way.

Gabby: Maddie’s words about her mom cracked my heart into pieces. We definitely exchanged platonic, love-filled letters post staff reading.

Mey: I cried during pretty much every single person who went before me’s reading. And then Whitney and Maddie were both before me and both of their pieces just made me fall apart, like, completely fall apart.  During Maddie’s piece, the altitude and all my sniffling due to crying combined to give me a bloody nose that started about 90 seconds before it was my turn to read. So then I had to go up there with a tissue, trying to not bleed everywhere while I read.

Cecelia: I needed a canoe to paddle out of there after Mey’s piece, it was the most heartbreaking and haunting piece about adolescent friendship that I have ever heard.

Mey: I had to run to the bathroom as soon as I was finished, and thankfully Stef and Hansen came in to offer hugs and cry with me while I was crying and bleeding out my nose. Megan once again came to my rescue with a ton of tissues.

Hansen: I think a pinnacle moment of camp for me was standing in a bathroom with Stef and Mey after Mey’s reading, then Megan carrying about two hundred boxes of kleenex in for us and telling us to cry quieter because we were disturbing people. It’s fine, everything’s totally fine.

Elicia: I have to confess, I actually avoided the staff reading last year because I don’t like crying. Not that anyone loves crying, but I’m super against it at basically all times, specifically in rooms of other people. I’m glad I was able to participate in the staff reading this year, otherwise I may have shied away once again from some really amazing moments that I am glad I didn’t miss. Whitney’s piece ripped at my heart and so of course the crying started and then Maddie, holy shit, and Mey? OMIGOD. They were all so beautiful and personal and gut wrenching and fuck, I CRIED SO HARD! In front of like, A LOT OF PEOPLE! This is probably an emotional breakthrough of some kind, right?

Kristin: I have no idea where to even begin. I cried a hundred times.

Whitney: Maddie and Mey’s pieces made my heart fall apart and then put it all back together again—thank you so much for sharing, and being so incredibly brave to turn your feelings into words.

Kristin: Maddie’s piece and Whitney’s piece and Mey’s piece and so many other pieces gutted me with all of the feelings.

KaeLyn: I wasn’t even sure I was going to be able to read my piece because I was weeping so hard from the Whitney-Maddie-Mey triple slam of untenable emotions that came right before me. I felt a little weird that I was reading something I’d written for A+, so some folks had read it already. I also, of course, am never sure how it’s going to go over when I talk about being a sex-positive sex educator who doesn’t have sex all that much. But you all were respectful and generous and right-there-with-us. It is such a gift to have an audience of folks who are truly there with you 100%. Thanks for that.

Elicia: KaeLyn’s REALLY REALLY spoke to me. It was all so good.

Riese: KaeLyn spoke so authentically about something people don’t talk about enough. And hearing the first two paragraphs out loud (in which she details sexual things they used to do) was amazing.

Gabby: KaeLyn and her sex stories were perfect. Also, KaeLyn is so sexy jeezus.

Whitney: KaeLyn’s piece was super sexy and wonderful.

Lizz:  As a side note: I was sort of turned out by KaeLyn’s piece even though I’m pretty sure that’s not the point.

Cecelia: I wanted to watch an entire three hour Titanic-level epic feature film version of Lizz and Rachel’s recounting of their friendship, it was that monumental. That piece changed me to be more open and generous in my relationships.

Lizz: Rachel and I wrote pieces separately about our friendship and then smashed them together at the end. I think it came out nice; I love you Rachel.

Rachel: Lizz you’re my whole heart.

KaeLyn: Rachel and Lizz should only ever read pieces about their friendship that they write separately. I feel like I know them both so much more as people through each other’s eyes.

Gabby: Lizz and Rachel told the greatest best friend story of ALL TIME. Literally, no hyperbole, I cannot think of one best friend story better than theirs. It fucking made me cry. These two snarky, hot shit, loyal as fuck, queermos told the story of their friendship and I wept and it was beautiful.

Riese: I love how Lizz, by the power of love, forces Rachel to become a person who tells personal stories on a stage! Their dynamic is amazing and the piece was excellent.

Kai: Lizz and Rachel might have given me life that night. And by might have, I mean my heart is beating for those two. The way they did the thing like a game of table tennis? Lizz. Then Rachel. Lizz again. Friendship is so nice and theirs is the nicest.

Gabby: Yvonne’s La Virgen piece made me hold up a brown fist in solidarity.

KaeLyn: Yvonne had me clutching my chest because it was so vulnerable and so real.

Mey: I loved Yvonne and Gabby’s pieces. As a queer Latina, they touched my heart so much and meant so, so much to me. They were really incredible.

Rachel: Yvonne’s essay about La Virgen had been a favorite of mine for a long time and I never realized I’d be so lucky as to hear it performed out loud; it was incredibly special.

Riese: It had been a long time since I’d last read Yvonne’s essay, and it was so exciting to hear it out loud now that I know her so much better than I did then. It’s such a unique and powerful piece of writing.

KaeLyn: Hearing Ali read her piece in her own voice was incredibly powerful. I remember when she published that essay and I shared it all around because it is so necessary.

Whitney: Ali’s piece was so honest and heartfelt.

Lizz: I’d read Ali’s piece about overcoming disordered eating on the site before, but it was incredible to hear it live.

Carolyn W: For weeks I had been working on an idea, something new that I wanted to compose. As of that morning I still had not finished it. Finally about 2 hours before it was done. Then Kaelyn convinced me to also read something from my book (now avaliable on Amazon) and I was nervous about reading it because it has a lot of references to people places and things in the African-American community that are even older than me. To make things worst I somehow ended up at the very end of the program after all of these amazing writers that made people ball and laugh til they snorted. Talk about intimidating.

Kai: Carolyn, I want you to know I was in the crowd vibing with every single reference you made. I hear you.

Carolyn W: I was excited that the audience seemed to connect with my pieces and later so many came up to me to tell me how good that piece that I finished just hours ago was.

KaeLyn: Carolyn was so nervous and then was so awesome and I think that poem was perfect, babe.

Whitney: Gabby brought to many feels to her piece—I love her as a speaker, a poet, and a writer.

Elicia: Gabby’s piece really got me.

Lizz: Gabby’s piece reminded me why she’s a writer and I’m a muppet.

KaeLyn: Gabby’s piece hit so hard it made me stop breathing.

Kristin: I learned that Gabby is the most brilliant reader of beautiful words that exists in all of time and space.

Riese: Gabby SLAYED and earned a well-deserved standing ovation. I get chills just thinking about what she read.

Stef: Welp, this camp caught me at a weird time, and I’m really proud to accept the award for Most Prolific Crier of A-Camp 2015. I started during Whitney’s piece, picked up the pace during Maddie’s, lost it during Mey’s and fell apart entirely during Gabby’s. I removed myself from the room multiple times so my horrible, wrenching sobs wouldn’t disturb the rest of the audience. Cool reading, guys.

KaeLyn: Riese is just amazing and I loved all the 90’s girl references, which I related to so hard.

Lizz: I so related to Riese’s piece about middle school. Like I felt what she felt then and now. Especially about how it feels to find someone that fits now.

Kristin: Riese read about falling asleep with Abby even though neither of them could ever sleep well when another person was near them and I melted. THIS MOUNTAIN. UGH.

Jenny: Wow. WOW. Okay. Everyone crushed. I laughed and I cried and I walked away with so much to think about. You are all such beautiful talented beacons in the night. Whoa.

Mey: Every year I’m reminded just how lucky I am to be on a staff with such incredible people and talented writers. And a super talented editor, Riese (who’s own staff reading was great) gave me the editing and guidance on my reading that I needed to change it from a lot of thoughts written down on a page to a real piece of writing. I just really love the Autostraddle writers so much.

Trent: I LOVED this. I’m totes doing this next year and I’m going to say “totes” a lot in whatever piece I read. Anywho… I felt there was a great balance in all of the readings. There was laughter, sadness, hilarity, vulnerability, relatability, understanding…lots of feels, but what else are we to expect? My hat goes off to every single one of y’all who shared a piece with us- so great. SO GREAT!

Ali: The staff reading is always my favorite part of camp, and this year was no exception.

Dannielle: You are all so talented. I cried four times.

Whitney: I was so honored to be reading alongside all of you brilliant, powerful writers.

KaeLyn: I finally understood Mt. Feelings at the staff reading.

Heather: I cried so hard after the staff reading, I did not think I was going to be okay. (I was okay.)

Maddie: After the staff reading I couldn’t really make words happen with my mouth, so I went and climbed into my top bunk and wrote extremely sentimental love notes to everyone else who read because I love all of you so much and I wanted to make sure I said so. Then I put them in everyone’s pigeonholes before I chickened out, and then I went to Klub Deer.

Dannielle: This was the first night we bro-d the fuck down with a bunch of staffers and started to feel all the feels about camp friends. Everyone is so fun and sweet and cool.

Elicia: The impromptu hang out in my cabin with Brittani, Kimber, Carly, Mal, Liz C., Jasika, Claire, Danielle, Jenny, Julia, Kristin, Carmen, Alex, Mary and Marni was the greatest thing of time. #BeetleWalk #HeyYouGuysCanIComeInHere #TwirlTwirlTwirl

Chelsey: After the Staff Reading I sat with the Blackhearts and some of the Runaways and we had a feelings circle. I can’t describe how powerful it felt to be sitting with all these strong humans listening to their stories and the things that scare them and the things that they were carrying. The feelings circle was exactly what I needed after the highly emotional staff reading and I’m constantly grateful for them for lifting each other up no matter what feeling they are having.

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Speakeasy Night at Klub Deer

Gabby : This was an important night for The Speakeasy. During the day our workshop was for QTPOC-only, so that we could heal and build community. But see, we also need to/want to do that with all of Autostraddle and this dance party was how we wanted to do that. It was our first official dance. EVERYONE was invited. We were so fucking excited. Carolyn, aka DJ Knocturnal, had been working on a playlist for weeks. Trent and I helped her tweak it on the mountain. We wanted to keep people’s asses moving and bodies thumping. We wanted everyone to feel welcomed and loved.

Carolyn W: For weeks I had been telling Gabby “I got this, don’t worry about a thang.” We came up with this idea of a Pajama Jammy Jam like in the movie House Party 2. If you are gonna model your party after House Party you MUST KILL it!!

Stef: We were told that this was some sort of pajama night, so I showed up in my actual PJs, a giant wolf t-shirt and leggings. For some reason, this was the night a lot of campers came out in animal onesies, and if you didn’t know what camp was all about you’d probably assume it was just a lesbian furry convention. I’d had too many drinks for this.

Cecelia: I saw people do unthinkable dance moves and perform illustrious acts in animal onesies.

Carolyn W: Literally the first three days of camp I could be found in random locations with my laptop working on my setlist. I got to Deer and Cee got me all setup. And I started playing at 10;45 to like call people over.

Carolyn W: At 11pm there were roughly five people. I was nervous lol. I didn’t want ANYBODY to miss a minute of this playlist I worked on. So I decided to play YG “My Hittas” until people came. Vivian bought a pinata and while she couldn’t make it to the party, Cleo helped us string it up. After the third spin SolAngel from FIREBIRDS ran into the party and that was all she wrote.

Laura W: Remember how I said that I had the best afternoon ever? The Speakeasy takeover of Klub Deer transformed it into the best day ever.

Gigler: Speakeasy night was an iconic moment for klub deer. DJ Knockturnal went all in on her set, Viv’s piñata was there, Kaylah was in her glory, Djuan turnt most of us out at some point or another, and Bump & Grind came on which was a big moment for Carmen.

Carmen: I was a little late to Klub Deer on Speakeasy Night, but luckily I didn’t miss “Bump ‘n Grind,” which Carolyn was gracious enough to play the spoken, sexually frustrated introduction to beforehand. I’m pretty sure people were calling my name. That spoken word introduction is literally my theme song.

Carolyn W: Dear Carmen, I dug around for 3 days looking for Bump & Grind on my computer but couldn’t find it. However all my DJ drinks and adrenaline laid it right in my lap and the perfect time just for you. Cause you sang it all the way up the mountain.

Gabby: We had Tower of Terror repping their cabin. The BEEHIVE in full effect. All the people in their animal onesies and pajamas twerking and shaking. There may have even been a steady-grinding threeway on the floor, ya heard. Shit, even Cee showed up to the party and Marni in her bear suit. It was perfect! In an ideal world, we’d all always be able to chill like this, you know?

Cecelia: If it’s any indication for how well DJ Knockturnal aka My Bunkmate Carolyn W was spinning, this was by far the sweatiest, grindiest Klub night of all.

Gabby: The DJ set was so strong. Bodies were grinding until 2am. We had to literally STOP THE MUSIC cuz people weren’t leaving. It was a beautiful thing. I’m glad that all A-campers were able to be with us and have a good time. That’s what we’re about. The Speakeasy is political QTPOC space, yes, but that doesn’t mean that we don’t move with love for all people. Let the mountain hear our truth and continue to bring us together and drop it fucking lowwwwww.

KaeLyn: I danced so much. long. I was sad that Nurse V was feeling ill, but we brought her pinata to Klub Deer and Cleo helped rig it up and at some point in the middle of the night, it started raining candy. The bump and grind game was strong.

Kaylah: Everyone knows that I live for a crunk night at Klub Deer, and I can honestly say that Speakeasy night was the most live night in the history of Klub Deer. I embarrassed myself by thinking I could handle Miss Kentucky without using Gigler or the mantle (our stage) for twerk support. Trent backed it up with such strength that I lost my balance and had to tap out.

Elicia: I’m still really pissed I missed the pinata being broken. Most of what I remember that night was how stoked KaeLyn and I were that people were making out. We were like, giddy about it. Is that weird?

KaeLyn: My favorite make-out team was the one where one person was in a dinosaur onesie and their dino tail was rhythmically swaying back and forth as they shook their booty and lip-locked with a cutie. SO CUTE. I wanted to run up to all the twosomes and the threesome and be do a little cheer, but that might be weird or ruin the moment, so I just chilled by the fireplace and admired how babely Elicia was again. Also I could watch Gigler and Kai and Kaylah and Carmen dance in a Vine loop forever. I really really could. Also, also, Trent. TRENT. OMG TRENT.

Trent: I twerked a lot. There was a pinata. I saw titties. I saw lots of bumping and grinding. I twerked a lot. I sang all of the lyrics to every Nicki Minaj song. Everyone had a good time.

Kaylah: My favorite part of the night was “closing time” and Carolyn turned on the lights and a slow jam thinking it would make us stop dancing. Muahaha! Don’t you know the A-Camp Twerk Team will twerk to anything with a beat? She straight up had to turn off all the music to make us leave.

Carolyn W: I had a BLAST it was the most amazing thing! I played straight party music, new music, old music, hip-hop, reggae, reggaeton. But I was AMAZED to hear the crowd turn up to old stuff like “Poison” “Rump Shaker and the ORIGINAL “Bitch Betta Have My Money” by AMG. But yo when I dropped “Scarred” by Luke that was it. All I saw was bodies folded like oragami. It was a hotbox!! There were animals making out in corners. We never go to hit the pinata cause someone straight pulled it down. People were partying outside. At the end I decided to play some 90’s Bump and Grind music. When I put on Jodeci “Stay” and it looked like the party was gonna go until 4am, Gabby pulled the plug. We literally had to throw people and out she had t force me to stop playing music. It was one of the most epic experiences of my life. And yes the DJ got a fw dances in too ;) I hope everyone enjoyed the night as much as I did. The pic of me and Djuan Trent says it all.

Gigler: Props and gratitudes to the organizers of speakeasy night, Vivian’s deer tattoos, and everyone who turned out &/or got turned out on the dance floor. I honor your contributions.

Lizz R.: I think I danced for ever and ever and ever at the Speakeasy Klub Deer night. Like forever.

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Stories From The Barracks

Stef: Our staff cabin was plagued by moths, a black widow spider and a water heater that died over and over and over again, despite Cee’s best efforts to learn how to repair it herself. On the plus side, she did hook it up so we were able to take showers in Deer, which was both charming and awkward at the same time (walking out into a serious panel in a towel feels really cool), and used the key to open up an extra walk-in closet in our cabin. She also went the extra mile and had a ladder installed on my bunk bed, which was a game-changer. I’m sorry we left the mountain before Cee was able to get around to more serious home renovations, like putting in shelves or landscaping.

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A-Camp 7.0 will take place May 29th-June 3rd in Angelus Oaks, California. Registration will open February 1st.

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