Quiz: What Lesbian Household Item Are You?

Here at Autostraddle, we know that lesbian and queer stereotypes sometimes have some truth behind them — such as that time we found queer people were more likely than straights to be haunted by ghosts. It’s data that just makes sense. [Speaking of data, if you want to take our 2022 Reader Survey, NOW is the time! It closes promptly at 6AM PST on Monday the 19th! Now that I’ve convinced you to tell us a little more about yourself, I’m going to tell you a little more about you, and just what kind of inanimate object typically found in a lesbian and/or bisexual and/or queer household you might just actually BE on a spiritual level.

When you were 7 years old, your favorite subject in school was:(Required)
How would you best describe your humor?(Required)
When you're feeling down, you most frequently tell yourself:(Required)
Choose a stock photo of a queer couple that has no rainbows in it but which may involve them holding glasses of milk and staring into each others' eyes, as you do.(Required)
Pick a struggle meal:(Required)
Your current top home-based fear is:(Required)
Pick a Halloween Doggo:(Required)
Pick a fruit:(Required)
Your favorite friend date to go on is:(Required)
Pick a Queer TV Show(Required)

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Nico

Nico Hall is a Team Writer for Autostraddle (formerly Autostraddle's A+ and Fundraising Director and For Them's Membership and Editorial Ops person.) They write nonfiction both creative — and the more straightforward variety, too, as well as fiction. They are currently at work on a secret longform project. Nico is also haunted. You can find them on Twitter and Instagram. Here's their website, too.

Nico has written 238 articles for us.

51 Comments

  2. Kombucha brewing on the counter. Hmm. Going to have to retake this. I’m much more of a boots or sweater queer.

  8. I got A Dying Houseplant which is fascinating because I was recently looking into getting a houseplant and was strongly inclined to get a Cast Iron Plant because they are allegedly unkillable.

    Is this an omen? Am I the harbinger of (plant) death?

    • Oops, also got kombucha and also see you with our fridge scoby that moved from our last house… two years ago 🫥

  13. Did everyone get kombucha? In my case it fits! I’m always stewing about something, I’m “healthy,” and sometimes I smell like a hippie.

  14. the queer couple stock photos killed me!!!! the milk!!!!

    i got kombucha, tyvm, will drink a Revive rootbeer kombucha (the only tolerable kombucha, absolutely delicious, highly recommend if you were a rootbeer kid) to celebrate!

    • Photos- so bad they’re good! Although, truth, there was a time when if you searched “lesbian” online you got horrifically awful photos of what straight cis dudes thought “lesbian” looked like. So, yay for progress, I guess?

  17. as a gay with ADHD, I feel very represented by my result (supplies for at least three hobbies that you started and then forgot about). *stares guiltily into their box full of knitting yarn from two years ago*
    also, I accidentally left my stove on for the entire week-end until a friend pointed it out and maybe saved my life yesterday (yay responsible lesbian friends!) so my worst fear has already come true (on the upside, it kept my kitchen nice and warm, which looking at the crisis we’re going to face, maybe my subconscious was trying to help)

  19. What does an Art Piece mean? Lol. I wish that there were sections of what each piece means. I have no idea how to interpret this…

  20. 40 comments in and no other water bottles so far???

    I am curious what makes me specifically an emotional support water bottle…

  22. I expected sweater, but completely understand being in the surprise kombucha club. Sometimes I make very Extra artisanal fermented foods in my fridge on purpose, sometimes I make very fermented food in the back of my fridge by accident.

  23. Dying houseplant is accurate for me both because I do not trust my ability to keep a houseplant alive and because

    • Misclicked and submitted my comment before I was done.

      Continuation: I feel like I personally am wasting away on the regular.

  26. I got Kombucha brewing, which some day in the future I hope I can brew homemade kombucha with my friends or girlfriend…it would be so nice…just kinda gives me good vibes thinking about it… seem’s like home…

Comments are closed.