If you’re anything like me, you’ve listened to The Rise and Fall of a Midwest Princess 18 billion times. We love her, I love her, you love her, we all love her (including the straights?!). Her upbeat, sexy, fun, queer tunes are the soundtrack to the summer. Even though I’m well past the age of summer school breaks, I still take this time to embody the mood of one of those Target summer sales ads: carefree, lots of color, cold drinks, pools, lounging, reading by the beach, a summer fling. Summer is just pride month, extended, so we should treat it as such.

If you’re anything like me, you’re also incredibly broke. For a free-spirit queer who thrives on the finer things in life, this doesn’t really work. I’ve spent countless summers trying to budget for little weekends away or visits to teacher friends who literally have a summer break, but all of it is still so expensive. This summer, I’ve discovered the beauty of a staycation. Sure, it’s always existed, but not with my unique twist on it.

I present to you the ultimate quiz for a queer broke summer; give me your favorite Chappell Roan lyrics, and I’ll tell you what to do on your staycation with your partner.

Pick Some Chappell Roan Things and We'll Tell You Where To Take a Summer Staycation

Pick a relatable lyric:(Required)

“I want this like a cigarette can we drag it out and never quit?”

“It’s like 199°”

“I hate myself”

“Everything is fine”

“No one’s touched me there in a damn hot minute”

“Choked up, face down, burnt out”

“It’s all in my head, but I want nonfiction” “

“I’m too scared to say half of the things I do when I picture you”

Pick your fav sad girl lyric(Required)

“Wishing you the best in the worst way”

“Every place leads back to your place”

“I’ll meet you for coffee because if we have wine, you’ll say that you want me. I know it’s a lie”

“I’d rather feel something than nothing at all”

“People always say if it hasn’t happened yet, then maybe you should go”

“If I didn’t love you, it would be fine”

“Same old story, time again”

“Here we go again”

What's your summer vibe?(Required)

Oreo cookies

Cheese Pizza

Vegetable Bacon quiche

Hot Cheetos Pickles

Apple Pie

Chopped salad

Frosted Flakes

Sushi

People describe you as:(Required)

Hot

Chill

Curious

A Bedazzled Chanel ring

A queen

Bridget Bardot

Beautiful

“Not overdramatic I know what I want”

Choose a lyric with no context:(Required)

“It’s hot”

“My friends call me a loser”

“Could go to hell, but we’ll probably be fine”

“Oh my God, you are heaven-sent with your dirty mind, yeah you’re perverted.”

“You know the truth”

“Karma’s real, I hope it’s your turn”

“You know what they say, never waste Friday night on a first date”

“Who can blame a girl?”

What lyric sounds like the most fun?(Required)

“Hurry up, it’s time for supper”

“Baby get me off again”

“People say I’m jealous, but my kink is watching you crashing your car”

“Let’s get coffee, let’s meet up”

“I just need a little lovin, I just need a little air”

“A wand and a rabbit”

“Telling secrets there on the mattress”

“Asexually explicit kinda love affair”

What are you avoiding?(Required)

“Distress as foreplay”

Attachments

Friends

Everything good

Fugly jeans

Thinking things all the way through

The Pink Pony Club (I’m more of an introvert)

Making my mama proud

Pick a word frequently mentioned in Chappell songs.(Required)

Jealous

Casual

Try

Heels

Dream

You

Baby

Call

Chappell was “Naked in Manhatten.” Where are you naked?(Required)

In public, obviously

A nude beach

Shhh it's a secret!

The bar’s bathroom stall

A yacht

A deserted island

Your bedroom

A boudoir photoshoot

What are you doing “After Midnight?”(Required)

Kissing someone else’s girlfriend

Kissing someone else’ boyfriend

“Be a freak”

“Start a bar fight”

Whatever I want

Starting drama

Kissing your girlfriend

Flirting

Choose your favorite song (difficult, I know).(Required)

My Kink is Karma

Casual

Guilty Pleasure

Pink Pony Club

Super Graphic Ultra Modern Girl

Red Wine Supernova

Kalidescope

HOT TO GO!

Finally, choose a Chappell Roan iconic look:(Required)

(Photo by Mary Mathis for The Washington Post via Getty Images)

NBC / Contributor via Getty Images

NBC / Contributor via Getty Images

Marleen Moise/Getty Images

Dania Maxwell / Los Angeles Times via Getty Images

Scott Kowalchyk/CBS via Getty Images

This site is protected by reCAPTCHA and the Google Privacy Policy and Terms of Service apply.

Δ

Before you go! Autostraddle runs on the reader support of our AF+ Members. If this article meant something to you today — if it informed you or made you smile or feel seen, will you consider joining AF and supporting the people who make this queer media site possible?

Join AF+!