BISEXUAL AFFAIR:
Sometimes it’s like, maybe all the girls in the office really do want to have sex with each other or something: How to Have a Steamy Office Affair — With Another Woman:“This was the first time I’ve ever been with a woman, apart from a few drunken, attention-grabbing teenage make-outs, precociously sexual childhood role play, and that summer before college when a gay friend stayed with me for a month and we slept in a bed together and held hands.It started, as every office romance does: with a happy hour.” (@lemondrop)
PORN AWARDS:
Bet you didn’t know about all the porn awards being given out this weekend. Did you win any? Us neither. Luckily we have been doing a lot of gymnastics and next year should be a shoo-in. Jiz Lee reports from the celebrations at the Postcard Feminist Porn Awards 2010, which seems pretty groovy and had fun attendees like Tristan Taormino and the Crash Pad Series people.
On the other end of the spectrum, the trashtastic AVN Awards took place this weekend and were actually televised for some reason we’re yet unsure of.
I know you’re on the edge of your seats so let’s get it out there: A special flick called Deviance picked up the prize for best all-girl sex scene. It features a lot of girls with large fake breasts and is “filled with double penetration, threesomes, interracial anal and some of the hardest couples sex ever shot,” which sounds lovelier than a unicorn. Also sounding really just delightful is the best same-sex release (it took me a long time to figure out what they meant by “release”) Evil Pink 4, which is “subitled “Twice as Wet, Twice as Fun” for the fact that all the scenes take place between two gorgeous ladies engaged in water play with garden hoses, bathwater, sprinklers, etc.” etc! !!!
winner, "best oral sex scene"
SEXTING KINDA
Do You Interrupt Sex to Check Messages? According to the Retrovo Gadgetology study, 11 percent of youth under the age of 25 who use social media said they would interrupt sex to check a message. (@carnal nation)
SEX & DRUGS:
Annie Sprinkle on sex and psychedelic drugs: “another time, I sat naked in front of my mirror and looked at my repressed anger, and let it surface. I hissed like a snake for several hours, and witnessed my inner Medusa in a remarkably non-judgmental and fearless way. I realized how sexual energy and anger are connected. I realized that in order to go to the next level of my sexuality I needed to learn to better express my anger.” (@erosblog)
DIRTY PRETTY THINGS:
Victoria Secret’s Izabel Goulart Nude For Hercules. Also, 21st Century Pin-Up Perfection. (@nerve, @coed)
MICHELLE TEA:
Brokenhearted, by Michelle Tea: “I don’t like to fuck rich girls, I’m too resentful of all they have and will continue to receive that I don’t like to give them anything more, not even a fleeting zing of pleasure, not even the implied compliment of my teeth on the back of their neck. I like girls who are dirty and tough, girls who’ve been through hell without a safety net dangling in the sulfurous breeze beneath them.” (@nerve)
PUBLISHING LESBIAN SEX:
The Naked Reader Book Club: Cleis Press Co-founder/Publisher, Felice Newman:Today, expressions of sex positivity, acceptance, and celebration of every gender and lifestyle are part of the fabric of modern society, but it wasn’t all that long ago being different often meant not having a voice to speak in public, much less sing. Pioneering publisher Felice Newman looks back from then to now and beyond. (@sexis)
ORAL SEX:
I’m not sure why this study is just now being talked about but whatevs here it is: “Most young adults agree penile-vaginal intercourse is sex, but less than one in five think that oral-genital contact counts as “having sex,” according to a 2007 survey of undergraduate college students.” (@webmd)
SEXY TUMBLR ALERT:
xdyke – wanna see jiz lee in a strap-on with a bunch of other alt-porn stars? But also you know, just like, pretty girls cuddling? ok then go there. it’s pretty new but maybe this will inspire them to post more stuff.
NAKED PRETTY GIRLS:
Who are “Jessica Weekley and Emily D”? It doesn’t really matter though ’cause they’re naked and cute:
I don’t think I’ve ever laughed harder at something on Twitter than when Carly and Robin started live-tweeting the porn awards. And these graphics are hilarious!
Thank you Rachel. I’m glad someone appreciated our commentary. I could not believe the delight we accidentally stumbled upon on Showtime. Really made my day, let me tell you.
Also I didn’t realize I was watching a possibly-live telecast, that’s even MORE scintillating!
lol at the texting
My favorite is “Yes, this is exactly how lesbians kiss. Good job ladies.” Who does that?
In that third picture with purple haired girl…uh, what is that in their mouths?
I don’t know who to email about these slip ups so I’ll just comment: re-read the intro right after the title, and the tags.
Signed,
a lesbain
I’m fairly certain they’re sharing a sour gummy worm. Probably because that’s sorta like a penis.
Good, that was my guess. It just looks really strange.
I thought of the lady and the tramp.
same-sies!
But, but sour gummy worms are soooo good!
things i liked: the michelle tea article, a lot.
things i do not like: the office romance article. your hat.
things i like: laura, a lot
laura, i like your hat a lot. you know which one i’m talking about. the one with the candy canes and fishing pole. please wear it to my next party in a tree.
– Oral sex is sex. PERIOD. I have a question. I apologize for my ignorance. Do lesbians give fingering the same value as oral sex, sex with a strap-on or whatever else you do? Because, I don;t consider fingering sex.
-Porn is a wonderful thing.
– If someone stop having sex with me to answer the damn phone I would leave. It has never happened to me but it happens on TV a lot and I take it personal. Like with Shane and Carmen, and more recently with Clark and Lois on Smallville. I just don;t understand, how you could have Kate Moennig or Tom Welling between your legs and even remember what a phone is..
lesbians employ various and complex point valuation systems for sex.
i find assigning value to sex acts and exchanging said points in a barter-like exchange very satisfying. like ‘i went down on you tuesday and wednesday (2 pts+ 2 pts= 4 pts) so now you owe me like a good solid hour of fingerblasting (4 pts/hr).’
this system works very well for me though i suspect others have entirely different ideas about how to spend and accrue points.
you guys use point systems too, right? …right?
love this! I think if people don’t use outright points systems, they are secretly counting them up in their mind for use in future sexual blackmail…
Argh, I so wish I had a mac so I could write a sex point calculator/tracker iphone app.
Yeah. But fingerblasting is worth less because you can watch the news while you do it.
I like to listen to streaming NPR, so it kind of equals out.
LOL. Now you have made me feel like a dick. I didn;t mean value like ..I mean.. like…is fingering as official, serious or whatever as oral sex?
I vote yes as far as officially being sex. As far as how serious, I think with any form of sex it depends on the intention.
Also, I’m glad Autostraddle is the sort of place where we can be open about our point systems and NPR fetishes. I love this site.
I take fingering as oral sex, or a substitute when my boyfriend and I can’t have sex (like when we’re at my/his parents’ house). But then again, it’s all relative really. Everyone has their own definition.
everyone needs their own system! but giving point values such as gamer achievements usually works for us.
also, to answer this more seriously, i think everyone in the entire world 100% disagrees about what ‘counts’ as sex so much that the concept of ‘sex’ doesn’t even exist anymore so i’m not even sure what people are having.
I have an awful feeling I’d be one of those people that would pause sex to check facebook. But I spend too much time on the internet to ever find someone to actually have sex with. Problem solved.
New Military Policy on Gays: Don’t Kiss – Don’t Yell An exclusive report by SPN Headlines:
http://spnheadlines.blogspot.com/2010/03/new-military-gay-policy-don-kiss-don_26.html
Keep smiling! :-)
i would defo pause sex to check my phone b/c what if riese was emailing to ask me to proof an article before publication? i’d need to take care of that.
#employeeofthemonth
suck up.
TWSS
I’m not usually one to fuss over such thing, but phone hygiene issues?!!
use the other hand?
I am cursed with ambidexterity
well I hear you have a lot of rubber gloves lying around, laneia.
it’s true, i do. i mean, you never know who’s going to show up for dinner.
…that’s what AS said.
holla
I love reading the comments!! You guys make me laugh! Another reason why AS is sooo addictive.
But it also makes me sad at the same time too, as none of my friends are gay, (combined with the fact they don’t know I am) so I would never in a million years be able to discuss such things with them. :(
As it happens, we seem to be living in the same world. Not so much fun is it?
Definitely not as fun much at the mo! I wish I could be who I am online, in real life, it’s like I’m living 2 separate lives. But hey, atleast were not on our own(thanks to great sites like this). So hey neighbour! I hope you’re having a great day!
It may take a while, but we’ll get there in the end.
You know whats the worst? When your phones going off and its your mom but you don’t know that so you keep ignoring it and then your phone goes crazy because your mom thinks your dead or dying and she calls you twenty times and then when you call back later she demands a reason for the non answers and you just don’t want to put that out there to her.
You are slut-shaming.
answering your phone can be fun during sex… am i the only one? texting during sex is RUDE!!!!