Feature photo of Mel Decaprio and Kacie Marie by Hana Haley for alexandreanissa.
All of the photographs on NSFW Sundays are taken from various tumblrs and do not belong to us. All are linked and credited to the best of our abilities in hopes of attracting more traffic to the tumblrs and photographers who have blessed us with this imagery. The inclusion of a photograph here should not be interpreted as an assertion of the model’s gender identity or sexual orientation. If there is a photo included here that belongs to you and you want it removed, please email bren [at] autostraddle dot com and it will be removed promptly, no questions asked.
Welcome to NSFW Sunday!
+ Feminist sex shops are essential. Sinclair Sexsmith has compiled a US-centric list of the best ones: “These kinds of stores often have all sorts of knowledge about women’s pleasure, about owning your own desires, about sustaining longer orgasms, about whatever kind of little pickle (ha ha) you might be dealing with in your own sex life. If you bring them your sex puzzles, they will help.”
+ Want to put a toy up your butt but not sure where to start? This Afterhours guide covers the types of toys and how to actually get them inside you:
“For your first foray into anal sex toy land, think about whether you want to be the one holding the toy, or if you’d like your partner to do it. If you’re nervous, I’d suggest being the one to hold it, since you’ll have more control. A partner has the advantage of being more dexterous, but you’ll have to make sure to communicate with them about what feels good and what doesn’t.
Next, find a position that gives you good leverage. The arm that’s operating the toy will need to stretch further than you usually do when you masturbate. Sitting up in bed with some pillows propped behind you is usually doable. If you’re with a partner, they can sit between your legs. You want to be relaxed and turned on before venturing backdoor. One of the challenges of using anal toys is getting your muscles relaxed enough for penetration, so do whatever tickles your fancy: put some fingers up there, masturbate, get your partner off, watch porn, fantasize, you know the drill.”
(Check out Autostraddle‘s guide to lesbian anal sex 101.)
+ Sometimes it’s just too cold to leave bed and you want to masturbate but your sex toys feel like ice and not in a sexy way. Try heating pads (depending on the toy), toys that are supposed to get warm, and storing things in your pillows.
+ If you want hangover sex, you’re not alone.
+ At Oh Joy Sex Toy, Kiku H. writes about asexuality, noting: “I spent most of my life unaware that this word existed. Sex was not something I thought about much, but when I did it was with a sense of distant inevitability. Sex was normal, maybe even vital. Reading about asexuality finally gave a name to my experiences, but it wasn’t a relief. It terrified me.”
+ “I talked about the [UK] porn regulations, and I was singled out for censorship,” writes Pandora Blake:
“We spent three days shooting a feature-length explicit documentary about our queer, kinky, polyamorous sex lives. We filmed interviews, video portraits, narrative sequences and hardcore sex scenes, capturing the intimacy and affection of BDSM play between people who love each other. The scenes were spontaneous and unscripted, a natural representation of the sex we have in private, and in the natural course of events they ended up including facesitting, fisting, squirting, caning, needles, breath play, dominance and submission and plenty of hardcore sex. It was authentic, caring and beautiful.
A week later, full of happy excitement about our new project, we learned that every scene we had filmed had just been criminalised under new UK porn laws.”
+ From the Autostraddle Lesbian Sex Archives: you need help being a bottom in a relationship with another bottom:
Whether you’re thinking about tops and bottoms in a super kinky sense or a vanilla one, the thing about being a top or a bottom is that it’s all in your head. It’s easy to get caught up in certain acts as being “things that tops do” (penetrate, be physically on top, shove people against convenient surfaces, administer bondage or physical sensation, or whatever) and “things that tops don’t do” (be penetrated, be physically on bottom, be shoved against convenient surfaces, be tied up) and to think of power as emanating or not emanating from those acts. But the great thing about sex is that you get to make it up as you go and the great thing about being queer is you get to have lots of practice rewriting things to make them your own, which is what you both have to do to get the sex life you want.
Whoo, thanks for including the sex shop map (there’s one in my city!) and the keeping sex toys warm post. They are excellent and now there are 2 more blogs that I look forward to reading! Also, the pictures are beautiful as always.
That bondage pic is totally awesome. Of course I’m enjoying it strictly for the nice deltoids on display (yeah right)
I was enjoying the first pic. She looks just like Dianna Agron.
Someday someone will make a set of panties for trans women that aren’t $40/pair, siiiigh