Welcome to NSFW Sunday!
+ America is not one of the 12 most sexually satisfied countries (which actually include Switzerland, Spain, Italy, Brazil, Greece, The Netherlands, Mexico, India, Australia, Nigeria, Germany and China):
“Americans are having a lot less sex than our friends overseas. Studies show people in other countries have up to 70 times more sex than we do. Indeed, Americans are only about 48 percent sexually satisfied. So how is sexual satisfaction measured? According to Durex global research, the drivers include: mutual love and respect between partners; freedom from stress; ability to orgasm; freedom from sexual dysfunction; good mental and physical health; and frequency of sex and foreplay. Oh… and having an exciting sex life! A 2014 study revealed that socio-economic status also impacted levels of sexual satisfaction.”
+ One of the realities of living in an apartment building is that your neighbours can hear you having sex. That should be fine but sometimes they are passive aggressive and obnoxious about it:
“You’re obviously a broad-minded person who wants to uphold your right to sexual privacy, so have a direct conversation with your neighbour. Acknowledge the thinness of the wall, and say: “I’ve picked up that it’s not comfortable for you to hear me, especially when I’m having sex, so I wonder if we could figure out some way to give each of us more privacy?”
You might then come up with a warning system to allow time for one party to take a walk, or discuss the use of masking music or earplugs. Directly addressing an issue is usually the best way to handle passive-aggressive behaviour.”
+ At Original Plumbing, Courtney Trouble lists 10 trans and genderqueer porn stars you should get to know.
+ Artist Gisèle Suzor-Morin makes amazing embroidery of lesbian porn.
+ At Oh Joy Sex Toy, Erika Moen reviewed the Stronic Eins.
+ S&M can lead to an “altered state” according to a new study out of Northern Illinois University.
+ At Kinkly, Stella Harris has an intro guide to rope play (also check out ours):
“One of the great things about rope bondage is that the building blocks you learn as a beginner never lose their usefulness. They simply become components of more advanced and complicated bondage. One of the basic building blocks for almost any kind of rope bondage is the single column tie. A column is any part of the body. It’s commonly a wrist or ankle, but it could also be a torso, etc. You can use the single column tie to bind your partner to the four corners of the bed or to bind one part of the body to another; wrist to ankle, for example.”
+ Malinda Lo shares advice for what to do if you’re pretty sure you’re in love with your best friend.
+ The Beautiful Agony Project shows how people orgasm.
+ Maybe everyone should stop talking about sex and love like people are property.
+ In an interview with the Rumpus, Elissa Wald discusses writing erotica and also submission and feminism.
+ At the Hairpin, Lindsay King-Miller answers questions about dealing with people who don’t get that bisexuality is a thing, queer YA, being in relationships, how to stop writing about how cakes are representative of sex in World War I-era posters and pubic hair:
“Assuming that the main way you’ve encountered naked female bodies so far is in Hollywood or porn, I can understand why pubic hair doesn’t yet have a place in your fantasies, but remember that those images are idealized and sanitized and far removed from the actual experience of sexing up another person. In real life, people have body hair and moles and scars and stretch marks and crow’s feet and gray hairs, and they sweat and make weird faces and can’t quite bend that way and stop and giggle and start again, and if you’ve had an active sex life with men you’ve probably already experienced that this is awesome, and the ways in which the interactive experience differs from the consumable image are the exact ways in which it is thrilling and surprising and joyful and fucking hot. In other words, pubic hair on its own might be off-putting, but pubic hair attached to a gorgeous woman who is into you is actually kind of rad.”
feature image by Josh Soskin
All of the photographs on NSFW Sundays are taken from various tumblrs and do not belong to us. All are linked and credited to the best of our abilities in hopes of attracting more traffic to the tumblrs and photographers who have blessed us with this imagery. The inclusion of a photograph here should not be interpreted as an assertion of the model’s gender identity or sexual orientation. If there is a photo included here that belongs to you and you want it removed, please email bren [at] autostraddle dot com and it will be removed promptly, no questions asked.
NIRVANA.
That last photo is so lovely! omg!
I’ve managed to never have sex in my own apartment, only in other places, and I don’t know if that’s an accomplishment or not? Occasionally my downstairs neighbor has really loud hetero sex though, so I just make headphones and Adam Lambert my best friends for the evening and refuse to acknowledge that it’s happening.
This is all great and I don’t want to be a party pooper but can we talk about what’s going on in Arizona?
Finally my love of needlework and my love of vaginas can be celebrated together! I didn’t know what I was missing until now!
because many of us know firsthand exactly how much fun vulval razor burn isn’t
I am doing an awkward little shimmy & pointing my fingers up at this quote from the Hairpin article, because thiiiiiiiissss. And it sounds ridiculous & laughable, but i’m glad when people say stuff like, “Well, pubic hair is a thing & you’re going to have to get used to it”? Just because, you know, the whole thing of the “idealized and sanitized” images that are so ingrained in our culture, it seems, that anything that deviates from that is “gross”– whether as an image or in real life.
Like, a FB friend once shared a picture of a print from Japan, of a woman getting eaten out by an octopus. And in the comments she said something like, “Is it bad that I’m more freaked out by her bush?” And i kind of wanted to say something, but decided not to. It’s so awkward when people you know & may have varying degrees of affection for say things like this (ie. my mother ragging on my underarm &/or leg hair when i don’t shave & making me feel like shit), & then you can logically think, Well, what happens if i ever get a significant other? What happens if we end up having sex? What happens if we get to that point & they see something about my body, or i do something or say something, that makes them go, “Ew no”? I know the advice everyone always gives is “Fuck them, you don’t need them,” but seriously?
……i don’t know where i was going with that, except yeah can we not demonize body hair especially pubic hair in the realm of sexytimes so that people don’t feel like shit about themselves just because they don’t, i don’t know, have a degree in landscaping
and i’m sorry for my comments that are very awkward & of novel length. NOW A MAJOR MOTION PICTURE! nooo
I hear ya on the pubic hair bit. When I met my gf I had a nice little trimmed bush. We had sex multiple times back before we knew each other THAT well. Then when we pushed into that boundary when I finally let her eat me out, and after multiple times of doing so , she brought up the fact that the hair down their ticked her face and was distracting from the task at hand. After a while of contemplating I decided to shave it because come on she is the one with her face in my hoohah. It’s a personal decision like you said and ‘fuck the other person they can take it or leave it’ isn’t always the answer. Respect their side too I giess
ah i was more saying how being able to say “fuck you” in the moment of someone outright saying “your body grosses me out” is…. hard? or it would be for me, if it happened. obviously you’re talking about something different; it sounds more like you both talked about it? which sounds better to me than someone demanding.
i dunno i just know that i let my hair do its own thing & if someone were to be like “ew no” it would hurt my feelings & make me more self-conscious. so i would be more like “i…’m sorry…..” instead of being able to be like “fuck off you’re not worth my time”. versus what you’re describing, which sounds like you were both talking it out.
I like your comments, especially the one about having a “degree in landscaping” – LOL. Ladyscaping is one of those things that you have to be respectful of, if you want to go places. Like in her. As long as you are into each other, it is all negotiable. I myself oscillate between retaining the mystery of a bush, and tidy signposts to the hidden treasure chest…
What I mean is if your woman loves you she will respect what you do with your pubes and you will respect what she does with hers, and it can even be a thing to discuss. Weird but true.
haha glad i could be of service |D
but yeah, that would be the ideal relationship, to my mind. not only is someone’s body always extremely personal, but something like pubic hair feels even more personal, especially since comfort plays a big role. nobody’s feeling sexy when they itch so bad that they want to rip their skin off.
Yes! Pubic hair is a thing, and some of us even prefer it. I actually had to ask one of my exes to shave less. This is a total over-share, but the first 5 or 6 times we were together I ended-up with a terrible stubble rash all over my face! It looked like I had been rubbing my mouth area on sandpaper for days afterward. But of course, she was my first real girlfriend, so I was super awkward and terribly nervous to say anything about it. It was awful.
Then finally I got a little tipsy and blurted out something like, “It’s your body, so it’s your choice what to do with it, and I totally find you beautiful either way, but… maybe you could try shaving a little less frequently? Cuz my face, you know? But it’s fine if you don’t want to, do what you want; I love you! Forget I said anything. You’re perfect.” Yeah, I was real smooth. (Pun intended.)
haaaa awwwwwwww |D i personally don’t feel like that’s overshare; it kind of feels like…reassuring. (awkward turtle returns to the sea)
and pun! heheheeeeeeehhhhhh.
I had a professor tell me once that the only reason I shaved “down there” was because men are all pedophiles. Never shaved down there again. Also, yeah, I can imagine going down on a girl and her vagina’s all shave-bumpy is not all that fun for your face.
nope i shave just because, because i like how it feels. and on reality and causality i would sooneer believe a convicted criminal than a GS professor. by which i don’t mean i have street gang types just out of the lockup sitting around and mentoring me as their adoring apprentice – but that i would believe neither.
If you have sensitive skin, stubble burn all over your face is pretty much the worse thing ever. Especially when your friends are all smart-asses and point to your red, raw chin while laughing about “Guess somebody had a good time last night!”
Awful.
To my, heh, tastes cred i should have recognised more of the porn loveliness.
And seconding the last photo sentiment – just sooooo adorable