Feature image of La Muxer Diosa and Zoie Blackheart in Crash Pad Series episode 281
. All of the photographs in this NSFW Sunday are from the Crash Pad. The inclusion of a visual here should not be interpreted as an assertion of the modelâs gender identity or sexual orientation. If youâre a photographer or model and think your work would be a good fit for NSFW Sunday, please email carolyn at autostraddle dot com.
Welcome to NSFW Sunday!
Instagram is failing queer sex workers, writes Erin Taylor at Bitch:
“A queer person sharing their own lived experiences of harassment being silenced is just another example of the damage of blanket censorship. Specific hashtags are also targeted; using hashtags that have been banned or are flagged as NSFW (#lesbian is flagged as NSFW, for example) can also get an account flagged. As per the aforementioned statement from Instagram, Instagramâs reasoning is that their goal is to target spambots, but this seems unlikely considering how many meme accounts donât use hashtags at all and instead rely on community-based growth. Ultimately, shadowbanning creates an environment where itâs nearly impossible to build community on these platforms, especially for LGBTQ people and sex workers (and especially for queer sex-working people).”
On the same subject, Out editor Harron Walker wrote about the censoring Google AdSense policies that mean she couldnât publish an image from a photography series by RÃo Sofia, “a trans woman whose multidisciplinary nude self-portraiture explores the coercive side of gender.” (Autostraddle faces the same set of restrictions; they’re why NSFW posts are tagged “NSFW” â to remove them from AdSense â and why if you see nipples on this website itâs a personal victory.) Walker noted that such policies, by Google as well as Facebook and Instagram, disproportionally impact folks with marginalized bodies and identities, as well as sex workers:
“Transfeminine people rarely control the making of our own imagery. From movies and TV to the Western art canon, our representation has, historically speaking, been a matter of cis cultural production. Thatâs begun to change in recent years thanks to camera phones and social media, which offer trans women a truly unprecedented ability to create our own images and share those images with the world. But that distribution becomes impossible when our tool for doing so â i.e., Instagram or Tumblr â forbids it. By deciding which images we can post, tech giants like Facebook and Google effectively decide which stories we can tell and how we tell them, something that could have disastrous consequences for journalism, queer or otherwise, if left unchecked. [âŠ] Itâs a dynamic wherein a dominant group is deciding the norms for us all, even when those norms require our silence to function.”
“Remember that you chose to love this person. Respect that and donât be an asshole. Be honest but keep the hurtful stuff to yourself. Love them without wanting to change them,” and other advice on marriage.
Read these books on the power dynamics of sex recommended by Saskia Vogel, author of Permission.
At the Creative Independent, adult film performer Pepper Hart discusses how Twitter and Instagram bans interfere with the DIY nature of porn industry connections and new work, as well as burnout, queer theory, reading the comments and more.
In California, sex workers can now report abuse or exploitation without being arrested on prostitution- or drug-related charges.
Hereâs how to prevent UTIs if you have a vulva. If that doesnât work, and actually chronic UTIs make you super anxious, Vanessa Marin at Allure has some advice.
Here are some (very gendered ugh) signs of an abusive relationship.
Itâs okay to not be able to orgasm:
“A lot of the cultural messaging we get insists that orgasm is the most important part of sex â and that sex without orgasm is automatically bad. But this isnât true. [âŠ]
Instead of focusing on orgasm, focus on pleasure. [Lux] Alptraum says, ‘What I would tell someone who is anorgasmic and wants to have enjoyable sex is the same thing Iâd say to someone who is orgasmic: think about how you like to be touched, think about what feels good, think about what you want out of sex. Figure out what you like and then do that, and donât think of an objective beyond feeling pleasure.'”
Herpes remains confusing and stigmatized:
“There is so much stigma around herpes; in large part, because few people speak openly about the STI. As a healthcare provider who talks to patients all day about sexual health, many of my patients have an actual diagnosis of herpes. Genital herpes isnât uncommon; the Centers for Disease Control estimates that about one in six people between the ages 14 to 49 have genital herpes. It is perfectly normal to feel upset and scared on first hearing a diagnosis of herpes but those feelings will subside over time, gradually getting better. People who are living with herpes have long, healthy lives, with very few consequences.”
I miss my NSFW Tumblr ð
I still haven’t found a platform I like well enough to even come close to replacing it, and the little community I had on there is gone. I didn’t rely on it for financial support, but it was the only place my photography got any attention, which certainly felt good while it lasted.
I don’t know if I’d even be alive today without NSFW tumblr ð
It was the biggest trans/gay/feminist/nonreligious community I’ve ever had and I’m not sure it’s even possible for another platform to replace it
If you ever think you’ve found something comparable to Tumblr, let me know! Flickr has no community, Deviant Art frustrates me and is full of chasers, Reddit is terrifying, and I feel like all the companies trying to replace NSFW Tumblr are focusing on the porn, not the community. Maybe something will organically come together somewhere? Sometime?
Loved the smiles on the pictures
I did not know that about Autostraddle and AdSense. Interesting
I’ve just been love bombed :(
Where was this link four months ago? ðð
(okay, I probably would have ignored it)
That 2nd to last picture is some primo sauce for me, engaging my inner art hoe and my passion for faces in the midst of pleasure at the same time.
If I was filthy stinking rich I would commission a painting.
First time trying to post an image on here, hope I got the HTML right. Hopefully you see an old picture with an intense eyeball. Hoping no one minds me cluttering up the comments! Please delete this if I screw up Carolyn sorry fingers crossed
Maybe?
I first learned that there is a stigma around herpes from American popular culture, to be honest. It was a bit puzzling to me. Herpes can be transmitted if, let’s say, you are 8 years old and a family members with an active herpes spot kisses you on the cheek. I have heard of one case where the herpes was actually quite severe, everyone else I know (myself included) gets outbreaks every couple of years or so and is usually fine. But it is so hard not to transmit it, I think it’s almost impossible?
Thank you also for the article about orgasms. I’ve spent a lot of time trying to explain to sex partners that there focus on me not having orgasms is stressing me out and that I enjoy sex much more if they don’t care, like I do. I know when I’m finished, thank you!