The original L Word had a very specific point of view when it came to men, and that point of view was that all told, men were very bad. While it was allegedly untrue that all lesbians were man-haters, it was unfortunately true that all lesbians were in fact surrounded by terrible men doing terrible things all the time and therefore had no choice but to hate the whole lot of ’em. Furthermore, the original series was hilariously limited when it came to naming minor male characters. and Gen Q continued in that tradition by giving new characters names already used on the original series. Because who cares it’s just men right????
Infamously, The L Word also agreed that all trans men were bad, but, then Generation Q came along with the bold argument that trans men were not actually bad, but were instead often boring. Is this progress? Who can say.
I gathered my fellow television editors (Kayla, Carmen and Drew) to vote on the men of The L Word and Generation Q. What follows is our expert assessment of the landscape.
44. Gomey
Mark’s Best Friend / Production Partner
It is far more difficult to seize the prize of “worst man” in the L Word franchise than it is to secure the Best Man award. There is a lot of competition for “Worst Man.” In fact, when designing voting for this event, for the first time in the history of me asking my colleagues to vote on things, I had to limit not only the number of 10s a person could give, but also the number of 0s. At the end of the day, everybody kept one fat zero in their pocket for this man, Gomey, the absolute scumlord lizard of a man who spoke some of the series’ worst lines (“News flash, man, this girl you’re crushing on is never gonna be with you! You’ve got a real live dick and that disqualifies you from getting up in there!” is a line that will haunt me well into the afterlife) and inspired Mark to put up hidden cameras around his home to film his lesbian roommates having sex. However, one big thing Gomey did for lesbian culture was inspire what I still consider to be one of the best episodes of noted L Word podcast To L and Back of all time, in which Carly and I fantasized about all of the ways him and Mark could die.
43. Hendrix
Angie’s teacher and boyfriend, Generation Q
Carmen: A grown ass man dating a barely 18 college freshman, who is one of his students. And then he has to nerve to belittle and infantilize her during their break up? My dude, yes she’s a child, So!! Why!! Were!! You!! Dating!! Her!!
Drew: It’s not just that he’s hooking up with his student — it’s that he’s boring and made Angie’s whole storyline boring.
42. Rodolfo Nùñez
Dani’s father, Generation Q
Drew: The show kind of made it seem like he was the L Word universe’s version of the Sacklers, so… can’t get much worse than that.
Carmen: I gave Rodolfo two points to counter the fact that he was written as a slick, suit wearing, Latino drug dealer stereotype and while that is awful and unlikeable, I want to acknowledge that the fault on that lands with the writers.
41. Drew Wilson
Aloce Show producer, Generation Q
Erica Parise/SHOWTIME.
Carmen: A man created solely to be hated.
40. Danny Wilson
Dylan’s boyfriend and filmmaking partner
He entrapped Helena and disrespected Peggy Peabody. Plus I could really never stop seeing him as a cylon.
39. Mark Wayland
Shane & Jenny’s roommate
Blake Lively’s brother, Eric Lively, joined The L Word‘s second season as Mark to deliver one of its most batshit terrible storylines and trigger Jenny into a nervous breakdown. Initially he had a lot going for him, like that he was hot and had a cute bromance with Shane, but despite being the brains behind our favorite short film, “Shane/Carmen Love Confession,” Mark was banished to the vortex forever. Good riddance!
38. Aaron Kornbluth
Producer of Lez Girls
A realistic character who told a lesbian he valued her art and her point of view and therefore wanted to fund her project but then when it was all said and done wanted to change the art to be less gay. Boo!
37. Tom Mater
Jodi’s interpreter and Max’s boyfriend
Carmen: Wait why did Tom leave Max? What I am forgetting? What’s the drama?
Drew: Max was pregnant (via Tom) and Tom disappeared in the middle of the night!
Carmen: THE FUCKKK
Oh wow ok thank you, i shall rate him accordingly!
36. Henry
Tina’s boyfriend
Henry had terrible friends and clipped his toenails right in front of the camera.
35. Josh Becker
Tina’s colleague / hookup
On the upside, his decision to tell Tina, mid-makeout, that she’s definitely not a lesbian, did give Tina the opportunity to shove him away by the head and when you watch that clip in slo-mo it’s pretty solid stuff.
34. Greg
Actor who played “Jim” in Lez Girls and briefly dated Nikki Stevens
No
33. Dr. Benjamin Bradshaw
Kit’s married boyfriend
Carmen: Con man. I still cannot believe how much he told Kit to charge for a damn tart.
Drew: I mean he basically runs a cult but I guess he was right about the pear polenta tart.
Riese: Pear polenta tart inflation is late capitalism at its finest but also he was right and it turned Kit’s fortunes around. But then he stood Kit up for that cute date she’d prepared for with special food and everything! That was so sad! Also the alley cat business. IYKYK
32. Conrad Voynow
Dana’s agent
The best part about Dana’s homophobic agent was the part where she fired him.
31. Gabriel McCutcheon
Shane’s father
Shane’s Dad failed her as a child, and then showed up for round two: failing her as an adult and in turn, failing our dearly beloved Carmen De La Pica Morales and also Helena Peabody. Unforgivable!
30. Leo Herrera
California Art Center fundraiser
Leo was probably a bad man, but he gets a pass for also being a man so unmemorable that we all really had to try extremely hard to remember who he was and what he did. So he was the guy they brought in to “help out” at the CAC, against Bette’s wishes, and who told her in their first meeting that he met her ex last night with Helena Peabody and that they were so excited about the baby, which is like, oof, you know?
29. Tim Haspel
Jenny’s boyfriend
Season One Tim started out as a cutie who seemingly had little in common with his girlfriend Jenny, who arrived in West Hollywood and immediately began to cheat on him. Mostly, Tim was just a sweet guy who fell in love with the wrong girl. But his character also made some weird problematic and aggressive choices, including many of his lines at that lunch with Max and Jenny in Season Three.
28. Franklin Phillips
Bette’s boss at the California Art Center
Fired Bette at her father’s funeral. Bad taste in art.
27. David Waters
Kit’s son
Kit’s son literally just had to sit there and smile and hold Angelica so Bette could get her second-parent adoption rights and instead he did a little speech about how gay adoption was bad and Angelica would suffer without a man in the house. As we all know from Generation Q, Angie turned out just fine, so.
26. Randy Jackson
Tim’s co-captain for the California University swim team
Tim Haspel’s only friend, said some weird things about lesbians?
25. Irwin Fairbaks
Dana’s father
Dana’s Dad…. homophobic…. also is Colonel Tigh….
24. Isaac Zakarian
Bette’s boss at the Zakarian gallery, Generation Q
He was fine?
23. Dan Foxworthy
Therapist to Bette & Tina and also Tasha & Alice
Mediocre at his job, missed opportunity for The L Word to hire a hot queer couples therapist.
22. Melvin Porter
Bette’s father
Carmen: As a Black person walking upon this earth, I cannot in good conscience give Ossie Davis a zero. But just know, in my heart, this is someplace around a zero.
Drew: Yes, he’s homophobic. But Ossie Davis is such a good actor, he makes the character complex and even likable.
Riese: I loved the way he said “Ms Kennard,” that’s what I call Tina in my head now forever
21. Angus Partridge
Angie’s Manny and Kit’s boyfriend
Noted Manny and lying lowdown nanny-fucking motherfucker Angus Partridge got more screen time than any other cis man on The L Word.
Carmen: I’m saying though… HE CHEATED ON PAM GRIER!!! Some things are unforgivable.
Drew: He cheated on Kit and he also interrupted her recording session. He was an insecure man who ruined the best things in his life. But people are complicated and I do think he had some really nice qualities!
20. Captain Curtis Beech
Tasha’s attorney in her DADT trial
Riese: Did he start out homophobic and annoying? He did. But did he come around eventually??? He did!
Carmen: I gave bonus points for any affiliation with Tasha. I am who I am.
19. José Garcia
Micah’s boyfriend, Generation Q
Erica Parise/SHOWTIME.
Carmen: Wait now, why do we hate Micah’s Jose? Why don’t I remember any of these men’s worst deeds?
OH WAIT was Jose married and never told Micah? But he was so cute!!
Drew: Yeah he was married and didn’t say
But yes very cute lol
Riese: MICAH MERMAN PAINTING DREW
Drew: OMG I FORGOT
Carmen: OMG THAT PAINTING
Riese: the most offensive art in the history of the franchise
Carmen: ok no gotta take off another point
18. Leonard Kroll
Phyllis’s husband
Carmen: No. Just No.
Riese: That fight with Phyllis in her office where he asks her if she wants to flush their life down the toilet is some of the worst dialogue in L Word history. But also… he is sad and his heart hurts and it was sort of cute when he came over to Alice’s to learn about lesbians…
Drew: He’s just a man whose wife is a lesbian doing the best he can with that info.
17. Gene Feinberg
Jenny’s boyfriend
Gene was such a nice Jewish boy. Loved marine life, brought Jenny flowers, was chill about Robyn.
16. William Halsey
Funder of Lez Girls
Carmen: Cher Horowitz’s dad debate teacher will always get at least a 8 out of 10 for me, no matter the role, on principle.
15. Clive
Shane’s friend
Clive was just going through a rough time and needed help, you know?
14. Burr Connor
Famous actor Jenny was going to ghostwrite for
Well, we hope this man found his way out of the closet.
13. Hassan
Micah’s hookup, Generation Q
Hilary Bronwyn Gayle/SHOWTIME.
Very hot, did not do or say anything particularly memorable.
12. Harrison
Dana’s double’s partner / beard
Dana’s gay doubles partner. Sometimes I remember this role as being played by Andrew Rannells even though it wasn’t. But like….. imagine if it was?
11. Sunset Boulevard
Employee of The Planet After Dark, Kit’s boyfriend
This man was a good man — but also a very bad drag queen. But happy for Kit that she ended her run in the franchise with a boyfriend who didn’t suck! Porter for Progress!
10. Oscar
Social Justice Advocate
Very kind and helpful man who gave Tina something to think about during her miscarriage grief (volunteering for his org) and also helped getting dirt on Faye Buckley for Bette’s debate.
9. Pierce Williams
Bette’s mayoral campaign leader, Generation Q
Drew: I’m glad that Brian Michael Smith landed his role on 9-1-1: Lone Star and that worked out well for his career, but I wanted more for Pierce and his flawless suits.
8. Shay McCutcheon
Shane’s little brother
Kayla: I feel like people hated him but he was literally just a child? Also really love the side of Shane he brings out.
Carmen: I know this is a minority opinion, but I wish Shay had stayed on the show and gotten adopted. Shane had never been better. Anyway, give that kid a milkshake!!
7. Howie Fairbanks
Dana’s brother
Dana’s gay brother knew how to have a good time!
6. James
Bette’s assistant
Drew: Behind every powerful woman, is a man scheduling her meetings.
5. Tom Maultsby
Alice’s ghostwriter & boyfriend, Generation Q
Carmen: Such a great use of Donald Faison’s easy smile and charm. Tom, you did no wrong.
Drew: People were so weird about Alice actually having a boyfriend. Tom was lovely!
Kayla: Genuinely great chemistry with Alice! Even though nothing about the publishing industry made sense wrt his character!
4. Max Sweeney
Drew: I love Max. Even if I don’t love everything the show did with/to Max.
Riese: We’ve obviously discussed this issue to death on To L and Back, but Max is such a hard one, because he was such a sweet, earnest, interesting character but transphobia in the writers room did him — and all trans men — so deeply dirty. His return in Generation Q was one of the show’s best moments.
3. Micah Lee
Carmen: Micah deserved better than Generation Q. Micah deserved to be a shy 00s-style romantic comedy lead in which he’s a flower shop owner who has chemistry with a deadpan girl who didn’t think she could fall in love, played by Ayo Edebiri. In this essay, I will…
2. Ivan Aycock
Kit’s friend
Carmen: Swoonworthy.
Drew: The show’s best depiction of transmasculinity occurred when they didn’t even know that was the story they were telling. I think this often happens with cis work about trans people. Sometimes it’s best if they’re just observing the realities they see rather than bringing their baggage of What It Means To Be Trans.
1. Billie Blaikie
Kit’s party planner
Drew: By far the best man in The L Word‘s history. Shows up, helps Max transition, has a sex at work, and then goes off on his merry way.
Couldn’t agree more about Shay!! That’s my favorite L Word storyline, no exaggeration
And perfect top 4 overall, especially Billy. I feel like Billy and Max’s relationship might be my second favorite L Word storyline.
As always, I’m reminded that what I like about this show seems to be wildly different than what most people seem to like about this show (seems to be Tibette for them, mostly). I’m glad Autostraddle has always been a soft spot for me to land in that regard!
There is this peculiar tendency of a certain kind of TV fans to want the characters to behave in a certain way and make the same mistakes over and over again – as if it were a sitcom before long narrative arcs on TV shows caught on – and resist any sort of change in the core of the characters as they were when that particular fan started watching. TiBette die-hards land in that category for me.
always happy 2 be ur soft spot !!!
also agree on the top 5! and it’s kind of impressive how few men were even in this show, considering 9 seasons.
Micah deserved so much more.
Related: I give Hassan an automatic two-point deduction for inviting everyone to his improv show at Bette’s mayoral event.
omg i can’t believe i forgot about the improv show, would’ve docked him hard for that
They saved the best men on the show for the soundtrack: Leonard Cohen, Rufus Wainwright, Joseph Arthur, Damien Rice…
Love this article, but I had to chime in! Wallace Shawn played Mr. Hall, not Cher’s dad.
right??? that soundtrack was SO F*CKING GOOD
I fully apologize that this is my takeaway/somewhat less than meaningful contribution but William Halsey/Wallace Shawn is Cher Horowitz’s debate teacher, not her dad.
Oh my god!!! I think…. I mean, I know…. wow, you are so right.
I have fully swapped this in my head for years.
It’s still the exact right ranking and reasoning! William and his family were sheer nonsense fun/agents of Season 5 chaos.
Hm, I was really rooting for James as #1. His only shortcoming is that he didn’t continue to sacrifice his life and stay on as Bette’s assistant throughout Generation Q.
Hard agree! I remember worrying that James would be gone when Bette moved to her job at the university (season 4 or 5?), and I was delighted he was still there for her to order around.
I was pulling for Mr. Piddles to take the #1 spot, but this was a great list!
I will die mad about the Tim Haskell character assassination. The writer’s room was really bad about writing men. There was no reason that his character had to go from being a loving, supportive partner to the toxic mess he was. I know it’s peak soap opera writing, but I hated with the show did with him. There was a chance to split them up without all the general toxic masculinity they put into the character. He could still be sad and angry and hurt without turning into a monster.
yes i agree 100%! i think the weird things he did (like physically clutching marina’s wrists to the point that she got bruises) didn’t really fit with the character they established at the start. like they wanted him to not just be a man, he had to be a BAD man, i guess to justify jenny cheating? but it’s a more compelling narrative i think if he is a good man and she’s still doing what she’s doing
There’s this weird overlying (I hate to use the word) misandry in the original series. Even the men the main cast see as trustworthy pop up and reveal themselves to have been infiltrators or monsters. Max becomes The Incredible Hulk when he starts taking HRT, Angus (a sap and a goober, but generally a good guy) becomes a resentful, nanny-fucking motherfucker when they want to write him off, and then there’s Tim. I agree that the idea that Tim could be a good man and Jenny would still do what she did is more compelling, and would probably be more compelling in the long run. And the decision to have him start sleeping with one of the students confirmed my icky feeling that it’s not good enough to just write him out – they have to destroy anyone’s desire to see him back to validate Jenny’s choice to move on.
I kind of hate it.
No room for Marcus Allenwood on this list? And the guy (don’t remember his name) who Tibette invite to have a 3some to “steal” his sperm? Where to we stand on Lisa the Lesbian Identified Man?
tbh i did have marcus allenwood for this list and took a screenshot and everything and idk what happened lol, but i can fix it!
we stand that Lisa reads as a trans woman — similarly to Ivan, that the show does its best work around transness when it doesn’t know the story it’s telling:
https://www.autostraddle.com/the-l-words-lisa-the-lesbian-identified-man-a-trans-symposium-459025/