Remember back in November when we told you that Mama Chaiken was all set to produce that medical pilot, Rhodes to Recovery, with the Two and a Half Men producers? Well, guess what!? Per ushe, she saw something shiny, dropped that plan and is now supposed to executive produce the CBS drama pilot, Hail Mary, with the show’s creator, Jeff Wadlow and Joel Silver.
Her new toy, Hail Mary, “is a buddy P.I. show set in Atlanta that focuses on a suburban single mom who teams up with a streetwise hustler to solve crimes.”
Rhodes to Recovery is just the latest in a growing list of aborted post-L Word Chaiken projects. Like, whatever happened to Chaiken’s CW drama, Confessions of a Back Up Dancer? Or the other CBS show she was supposed to develop based on The Physick Book of Deliverance Dane about “a young woman who realizes she descends from a long line of witches dating back to 1692 Salem?” The number of questions I have for Ilene grows by the day.
Meanwhile, back at the ranch, The Real L Word is filming season 2, focusing on Whitney and her friends and everyone is sworn to secrecy about who exactly those friends are. No word on the chicken’s involvement so far, but I’m sure she’ll pop in just in time for those weirdass episode intros to ask Whitney, “How long do you last during sex?” and “What does a lesbian taste like?”
I stopped caring about Chaiken’s career right around the time Shane left Carmen at the alter.
i stopped caring after she tried to make me hate jenny (jennie4lyfe)
I can’t seem to stop caring, I am obsessed with her ability to succeed without any talent for telling stories
She is the anti-Joss Whedon.
I think a round of wild speculation as to the reasons for her continued, inexplicable success is in order.
I’ll go first: Regular animal sacrifices.
I bet it’s mafia connections. She threatens everyone into agreeing to whatever she wants to do (that is until she tires of it).
oh i know, actually for real, is that she’s the only lesbian who’s made a ton of money on lesbian stuff ever. which is actually really fucking awesome, and an incredible achievement. she’s a savvy businesswoman and doesn’t care about loyalties or feelings, which is what stops the rest of us from getting ahead a lot of the time
oh, i’m endlessly fascinated.
i stopped caring when she made angus a bad person…. or made us hear the whole acoustic version of “sunny came home” on the olivia cruise.
at least bette is on that new fox show.
but angus cheating gave us “nanny fuckin motherfucker”
…which was scripting awesomeness.
Hah, hah, hah!!!
You guys, you are so funny!!!
wow. do you guys really hate her this much, or is it just a running joke at this point?
running joke
nothing inspires me more than an ilene chaiken news story. she’s the gift that keeps on giving.
hearing ilene chaiken talk makes my ears wish they could close over onto themselves.
omg do you remember that denzel movie where the devil (beelzebub, holla) was really this floating spirit that just infected people by touch and they sang that fucking creepy rolling stones song or whatever?
she’s the fucking lesbian devil spirit.
also for real when haviland e-mailed me this story today, the story she emailed me from whatever, variety or something, also said ‘ilene chaiken will run new cbs crime drama’ and i thought for real it said ‘ruin’ not ‘run’
Is Ilene Chaiken from earth?
Maybe they’ll be able to figure out who killed Jenny? The suburban single mom is probs Paige, who actually killed Jenny in order to get back with Shane. And the plot revolves around her trying to steer the evidence away from herself. And then Carmen can come in and “mediate” something, as in, get in between Shane and Paige (something I wouldn’t mind seeing). And then as all threesomes go, someone will get more attention than the someone else, a lesbian or two or three cries, someone goes to therapy, everyone has lots of feelings and then Sharmen is reunited.
TA DA. Ilene wins all the lesbians. ARE YOU LISTENING IC!? consider this my resume.
But…if Papi turns out to be the hustler, I might kill myself. JUST SAYIN.
Genius!
hey guys, I know what a lesbian tastes like.
pineapple and salt if you are lucky
wait what I thought it was rainbows and strawberries?
tastes like chicken?