Today on Autostraddle: Autostraddle Roundtable we tell you all of our feelings about Sexuality! And G-D! And everything! Autostraddle Team Member Crystal’s first dispatch from Sydney’s lesbian nightlife is one of my favorite things we’ve published here, and also check out a sneak peak of our NewNowNext photos, Riese & Laneia read YA novels AND AND AND …

Our latest Girl-on-Gallery is Part One of Two – Actual Lesbians/Bisexuals! (It’s alphabetical by first name, A-L is this week, let us know if we’re missing anyone!)

+ Did you hear the one about the Texas mayor who quit his job for love? See, Mayor J.W. Lown of San Angelo fell for a man — a Mexican illegal immigrant. Because same-sex marriage isn’t recognized anywhere for immigration purposes, Lown either had to give up the man, or give up the office:

“As someone who has closely observed politicians for many years, what I see is the rare integrity of a politician who couldn’t rationalize his way to swearing to uphold the laws of his state and nation while breaking them.

When it comes to sex, we’ve seen the president of the United States lie under oath, the governor of New Jersey provide a high-level job for his unqualified secret gay lover, the governor of New York frequent a high-priced prostitute.

The mayor of San Angelo chose not only love, but also honesty.” (Rick Casey, The Houston Chronicle)

+ If Recession Sex is Better than Makeup Sex, what about Make-up Sex During a Recession? Recession sex better than make up sex! ”When the economy goes down, sex goes up” (@advertising age) First quarter sales of personal lubricants soared 32%. Does anyone want to make a joke about other reasons someone might need more lubricant than overwhelming sexual desire? Okeeey.

+ He was a blonde fashion model and now he’s a gay man: Basically he went from one area of social privilege to one of great struggle, which I think proves anyone’s point about anyone’s choice in the matter.(@the sun)

+Meghan Fox wants to make out with Olivia Wilde. AND SCENE. (@foxnews)

+ I’ve been hearing about lesbian vampire killers for a while, but this review is extra special: ”Lesbian Vampire Killers is a British comedy about two young men who go hiking through an English forest where Sapphic babes want to siphon their sanguinity, hack into their hemoglobin, and drain their Type O, daddy-o.” (@sydney morning herald)

+ Battle over benefits for same sex marriage: ”Ever since, [his widower] has been trying in vain to collect survivor benefits from Mr. Studds’s federal pension and health insurance—tens of thousands of dollars he says he would be getting if he were straight.” (@wall street journal)

+ OH MY GOD IT’S SHANE! (Three Rivers Sneak Peak) Does anyone else giggle when Shane is like “thorasic organs go first? You guys, I want you to scrub in!” I’m like, c’mon Shane, what doctor do you have a crush on? Let’s fuck her in the supply closet and get this show ON THE ROAD!

I mean, these are the kinds of conversations Shane is going to be having (this is actual dialogue from the script for Three Rivers, slightly adjusted to better fit Shane):

Khalid: [reading a letter] “During the procurement, Foster cursed at the hospital staff, made unreasonable demands and disrupted the O.R. …”

Shane: Dr. Khalid, that staff’s incompetence almost cost me a good pair of lungs breasts.

Khalid: The head of Surgery —

Shane: Bob Yorn.

Khalid: Correct, Dr. Yorn Dawn Denbo has requested that you never return to his O.R. SheBar.

Shane: I had a nineteen year old smokin’ hot baby dyke with a rare blood type and uniquely gorgeous tits. The West Virginia lungs were probably the only chance I was going to get to suck face with her and I wasn’t going to lose them.

Khalid: I appreciate your dedication to your patients but when you are on a donor run, you are representing Three Rivers Medical Center.

Shane: Yes sir. (sidenote: what about Shane for Wax hello)

Khalid: Obvs, allowing you to do your Fellowship here after the problems at your last hospital  —

Shane: I went through a difficult time when my father died stole Shay and Dana died and I made some bad choices. (looking him in the eye) I’m here to prove myself as a doctor. And I know I’m only getting that chance because of who my father was —

Khalid: Actually, I see a great deal more of your mother in you.

Shane: Actually, I see a great deal more of your mother in me. You know … IN ME? Talk about a set that shouldn’t go to waste. Who’s got a dental dam handy, let’s SCRUB IN bedowww bowwwwwww.

Cleve Jones joins call for national LGBT march on Washington. (@towleroad)

I love that this is so revolutionary that it even has to be a headline. “A business wants to sell things to eager customers!”: Vegas casinos support gays. (@queerty)

U.S military uses Joan Jett to promote fleet week: ”It’s almost like they realize that Joan Jett is a lesbian icon and would be a great recruitment tool for young lesbians considering military service.” (@joe.my.god)

Parents sue school for inviting lesbian pastor to Diversity Day, are obviously assholes.(@towleroad)

Illinois poised to approve civil unions also poised for some serious wind. AHAHAHAH! I was born there. I’ll civilly unionize there. Whatevs. (@washington blade)

Someone has the best job ever, someone is an asshole and quits: Young and Restless star walks out over gay kiss. (@the advocate)

Colorado signs partner benefits bill. (@the advocate)

from Stef: I don’t really like children, but something about this video of Deborah Harry leading a bunch of little kids in a discussion about the true nature of punk speaks to my SOUL. Bonus points to the little girl in the lavender wig who asks Debbie if she poops on stage (to which she replies: “Well, so far I haven’t…”). Debbie Harry will never be uncool. End of story.

+

from Robin: My friend reminded me of one of my fave videos today — if you ever feel down and out about your work, watch this: Ira Glass on Storytelling.  Its amazing.. its for creatives.

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