I almost didn’t watch Birds of Paradise because the press releases kept calling it a “tragic lesbian love story” and “French” and also saying things like “école de danse” — and I don’t know what that last thing means, but if I want to watch something tragically lesbian and French it’s going to be Portrait of a Lady on Fire for the twentieth time. I’ve been burnt like one too many plates of spaghetti in Blue Is the Warmest Color to just dive headfirst into every tragic lesbian French thing. But then, I couldn’t stop thinking about dance movies, about Center Stage and Save The Last Dance and “I’m the best goddam dancer at the American Ballet Academy! Who the hell are you? Nobody!” and the way Julia Stiles does that little rabbit hop that makes the judges go wild in her Juilliard audition. And I didn’t want to rob myself, you know? What if I’d never seen Jessica Alba in Honey? Or Jennifer Beals in Flashdance? Would I even be gay?
Anyway, Birds of Paradise is going to get compared to Black Swan. It’s a psychological ballet thriller with erotic over- and undertones — only instead of subtle sabotage and emotional spiraling, it’s more like these rival lesbian ballet dancers slapping, tackling, wrestling, clawing at, and punching each other in the face. Until! They get assigned to their dorm room! AND THERE’S ONLY ONE BED! Second best fan fic trope ever. But I’m getting ahead of myself.
Kate Sanders (Diana Silvers) — a scholarship dancer, if you know what I mean, and I think you do because you’ve watched a movie before — used to be a basketball player the way Doug Dorsey was a hockey star in The Cutting Edge. But now she does ballet. Marine Durand (Kristine Froseth) went the more classic route toward becoming a ballet star — money and litheness — and is used to a Regina George-level of admiration. Kate is eager to please and a bit of a Mommi’s girl. She absolutely would not mind having Madame Brunelle (Jacqueline Bisset) stand on her neck. Marine does not want to hear one bit of constructive critique whatsoever! And keep your grubby poor people paws off her neck entirely! Only one can win a spot at Opéra National de Paris. Which is why they start walloping each other basically the second they meet.
Unfortunately, there’s not a whole lot of real dance stuff happening here. No one stomps in the rain or lifts anyone up over their head in a lake, no one twirls around on hay bales and Channing Tatum never comes flying out of anywhere. Writer/director Sarah Adina Smith is most curious about what happens when two young women with lots of ambition and emotional baggage sweat around each other all day and fall into the same bed each night. Which, you know, me too. That’s why I follow every player in the WNBA on Instagram. Kate and Marine start with telling each other their secrets, then move to snuggling, then scissoring. Classic lesbian trajectory.
My main struggle with Birds of Paradise is it doesn’t seem to know it’s pretty campy — which is especially jarring when things swerve south in the second half of the film. It wants to be pretentious but it’s too silly! I’m not going to spoil it for you but it gets, um, weird in the third act. And not in the freshest or most exciting way. Also of course, I was hoping Kate and Marine would at some point have to share their body heat to stay alive, which is my favorite fan fiction trope.
Birds of Paradise is a fine little lesbian diversion for a moody day. Worst case, you’ll remember how good Diana Silvers is in Booksmart and watch that again.
Um. Wow. That’s a lot of glitter in the trailer.
And fake dating is my favorite trope.
Heather Hogan! Netflix or Amazon or whatever tried to get me to watch this last night and I’m so glad you did so that I don’t have to. I think the preview + your review + a possible re-watch of Center Stage and I’m good to go!
I read the headline and before reading the teaser I whispered to myself: “there is only one bed… !!!“
Ok now I’ve actually read the actual review and that was such a delight.
Love the reminders of all the dance films that made me gay
😂
I completely disagree!
There was only one bed is 100% the best fanfic trope.
Yasmin, no! It’s body heat to stay alive, one bed, fake dating, magic AU, royalty AU, fairytale AU, and then friends to lovers!
Nah, it’s A Stormy Night, a Cozy Cave, and Hurt/Comfort: y’know, about a half dozen different episodes of “Xena”. 😉
This has everything I want and more!
(Also I would love a deep dive into community favorite wlw/ff/sapphic fanfic tropes so I can carry my torch for the deeply unrated ‘praise kink’ tag)
HERE FOR THIS
Agreed! And praise kink is like my number two fave! (I’ve got all of the issues XD)
I also wonder how many queer women/people on the femme side of things write and read m/m fics. Because I think that is a surprisingly high number going from what I see online and I am myself included in that number.
That’s also a dimension that would be interesting to see! My wife has read and wrote m/m fic for years, which also seems to be true for her friend’s group.
Agree! And, count me in there as well!
Anyone else read this to find out Heather’s #1 trope? Thanks for not disappointing, but I’m with Cleo—fake dating for the win 🥇
oh I know I’m going to LOVE this shit. I love homoeroticism disguised as passive-aggressive tendencies turning into semi-BDSM sex, I love pretentious (French) films with a lack of self-awareness that turn out to be silly (Summer of Love, anyone?) and I loved Black Swan so…this is my jam.
I don’t know if u read these comments but do I have the fanfic for u. Not only does it have the only-one-bed trope, it ALSO has the using-each-other’s-body-heat-or-else-a-very-chilly-death-awaits trope! And if that wasn’t enough to get ur jimmies rustled, the pairing will do the trick. It’s Buffy and the only other person who could be her equal…FAITH. god it’s good. It’s called shivery by aliceinwonderbra and nobody does Fuffy better than her. Highly recommend!!!
I don’t like this genre either, it makes me nauseous and hard to get out of, but the way the director conveys the message is really good.
Slope 2 unblocked