This Week’s Comment Awards Comes With A Special Message

Oh my god. Lesbians love the dramz. You guys are cray cray.

This week Crystal reviewed 20 albums IN HAIKU. I think this inspired everyone because there was much poetry happening elsewhere after this. Riese made us all cry with her article about Adam Lambert and Krista from Effing Dykes made us laugh and then feel really weird about ever having sex again.

AND THEN we revealed Miss December: Romi from The Real L Word who has also accomplished MANY OTHER THINGS.
I’m going to refrain from commenting except to say that sometimes it is hard to put your opinion out in a public forum, especially when you’re not sure how your opinion will be received. Sometimes it’s hard to defend your opinion because you’re not really sure how to articulate what you feel so strongly about; sometimes it feels like people are attacking you because they strongly disagree. Having your argument attacked and being personally attacked are two very different things — if you state your opinion be prepared for dissenting ones that take your words and refute them. This is not a personal attack.

I think we can learn a lot from listening to each other. No one here knows everything, so let’s take the opportunities we have to expand our knowledge in a safe space. Don’t be afraid of having your mind changed.

At Autostraddle we encourage debate because we know that not everyone is the same. I think many of us know what it feels like to be teased and made fun of and be attacked for seemingly no reason at all. There are ways to be critical without being mean. Take care with the language you use when talking to other people because words really do matter. If you don’t believe me, just think of the last time someone said something to you that hurt. Does it still sting?

Ps. All of the Calendar Girls are beautiful.

On Top 18 Anti-Gay Groups Listed, Obsessed With Nazis, Resent Being Called “Hate Groups”:

The Gay Agenda Award (So Complex and Thought Out) to Lou:
They are totally right though-not 10 minutes ago I made an obscene phone call to a child whilst I goose stepped around the apartment, and as soon I ended the phone call I got back to planning my Nazi military coup of the government here, pausing occasionally to salute a photo of Hitler. My plan (likes all of our plans obvs) when im in power is to adopt a load of children, turn them gay, bring in gay marriage and then THE SKY WILL FALL! *insert evil laugh here, etc*
Seriously though, ultra religious types, you are becoming ever more ridiculous with every passing day, what is wrong with some people!

On 20 Black Friday Gift Deals You Can Get Without Getting Off Your Ass:

The Mom! Make Me A Sandwich Award to Vikki, TLC DEMON:

On Every Silver Lining Has A Touch of Gay:

The Return of the Harry Potter Award Award to middlemuse, amythicalcurse, smartypants:

On 20 Album Reviews. 300 Words. Includes Girl Talk, Cee-Lo, T-Swift, Nicki Minaj, etc.:

The Autostradde: Filling the Holes in Your Life Since 2008 to Roxy2:
This makes the fact that

I am now out of string cheese

A bearable truth

On Heterosexual Supremacist Thinks Lesbians in the Military Just Haven’t Met the Right Corrective Rapist:

The Focusing on the Important Parts of the Article Award to Megan:
43% of gays have 500+ partners??? I am SO. FAR. BEHIND.
(That’s what everyone’s freaking out about in this otherwise balanced, well-researched, unoffensive, and completely not at all scary in its portrayal of rape as our natural state article, right?)

On Minecraft Review: Down the Rabbit Hole and Back Again, Kind of:

The New Award for Referencing The Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy to wallow14:
“Eddies,” said Ford, “in the space-time continuum.”
“Ah,” nodded Arthur, “is he. Is he.”

On Effing Dykes Presents: What Lies Beneath (Her Fingernails):

The Raining Rhinestones Award to the people in the picture:

The Because We Care About Our Celebrities Award to wallow14, Sally:

The Land Before Time Award to wasteunit:
That reminds me of the time I met this lady in a bar and we went back to my place to fuck. She seemed kinda weird, but we were both drunk, so whatevs. Anyway, a few days passed, and my vagtastic voyage was feeling kinda funny. I went to the gyno and found out that there was a dinosaur inside me. True story.

On Listling Without Commentary: Actual Answers to DADT Survey Questions, Out of Context:

The OMGWTFLOLBBQ Award to C, countrysongs:

The Aaaand There’s the Mean Girls Quote Award to lola k:
“So then, for my birthday party, which was an all-girls barbeque, I was like, “Janis, I can’t invite you, because I think you’re lesbian.” I mean I couldn’t have a lesbian at my barbeque. There were gonna be girls there *eating grilled meat*. I mean, right? She was a LESBIAN.”

On Autostraddle Calendar Girls: Romi is Miss December:

The Dead Poets Society Award to e:
so everyone’s a little huffy
and we’re mad and our faces are puffy

and we all think different ways

and of course thats okay

but lets remember the important things, Buffy.
girls who like girls are real hot

because we know that we have a shot

so lets all hide our knives

and return to our lives

of loving each other a lot

The Dead Poets Society II Award to pyrrhic:
My goodness. Such an uproar over butts -

though such a butt, alas, is rarely seen –

these queers have really gone a little nuts,

while Romi (bless her soul) remains serene.
The hubbub springs from sources we cannot

account for – “jerky friends” and other ghosts

in the machine. However, one cheap shot

ought not derail the discourse of our posts.
By this I mean that we should redirect

our focus to the proffered assets here;

it seems a shame to have the comments wrecked

while we poor cluds might such a sight revere.
So long as gays can type or sites refresh,

so long let Romi bare her flawless flesh.

The I FUCKING LOVE SUPPORTIVE PARENTS AWARD to Ann Stemmer:
Romi, you look beautiful, strong, and sexy! I am proud of your shoot and believe you are a perfect choice for Miss December. I am proud of you for standing strong in all your choices, good or bad Romi…All we have in life is to recognize our ability to choose our steps, change our mistakes and be the change we want in our life. You have always danced to your own drummer and I am proud of you for always standing up for your choices and never allowing yourself to be a victim. You are more than this calendar, more than your work, and more than one episode on The Real L Word. You are a wonderful daughter, sister and hard working, dedicated young lesbian woman. All of your identity is not in your sexuality, it is in all of who you are. I love you!!!!! Your mom.

On This is a Post About Gay Grammy Nominees, Lesbian Movie Scenes, Johnny Depp, Neil Young:

The So What If I’m a Little Self-Indulgent Award to SomethingClever:
Holy shit when did Neville Longbottom get hot?
Yes, I am commenting on the six words in this post about Harry Potter and not anything else. Ok, really I’m just trying to squeeze some more Potter in here for Emily.

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Emily

Emily Choo started as an intern with Autostraddle when she was 18 years old. She's now 10 years older and lives in Toronto with her partner and cat. The defining moment of her career was when Riese said this about her: " I think Emily Choo is a very bright, 'poetically inclined' girl who pays attention to everything and knows almost everything (the point of stuff, how to read, how beautiful things feel, how scary things feel, etc.) but doesn't believe/accept/realize yet that she knows almost everything." She still doesn't believe she knows anything, so, thank you, Riese, for that.

Emily has written 100 articles for us.

42 Comments

  2. The Hitchhiker’s Guide series IS MY BIBLE. I was seriously considering only commenting in references to it from now on.

    OR

    “Thank you,” it said, “for making a simple door very happy.”

    • i have a renewed sense of appreciation for towels after i finished reading that book. a reference to the hitchhiker’s guide to the galaxy is a guaranteed comment award, kind of like any mention of harry potter. i’m so easily manipulated.

    • You totally just made me want to go back and reread that book. I haven’t read it since the 6th grade. Love it.

    • OMG!! Did you see the limited edition leather print that barnes and noble made of Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy? I always like lookig at those, my sister and I make a special trip to barnes and noble every year as a tradition to look at them.

  3. Ahhhh shucks Emily! Thanks for rewarding my shameless appeal to you. Expect more in the future.

    Also, high five on your team pick!

  4. Perhaps if I spent less time thinking out such complex responses and more time studying id be better off…but regardless, my first comment award, thanks a million, put a smile on my face and gives me an excuse to have an extra drink tonight so that I can toast Autostraddle, the internet, and gayness in general, hooray! :-D

  5. really glad for the little psuedo-PSA and all of Riese’s and the other AS team’s comments on the Miss December post. regardless of how you might feel about something (seething desire! seething hate! unfounded lust! ignorant disgust!), this is a site that we all come to bc being gay is important to who we are. we’re all different shapes and colors and sizes, with different educational and socioeconomic backgrounds, with completely different goals and aspirations and an [apparently ridiculous] myriad of opinions — but we all come together to agree on one thing: girls are hot and vag is great.

    the thing is, while we lezzies love the snark, isnt there enough of that elsewhere? read any youtube or gawker or mainstream news/gossip rag comment feed and youre bound to find a few assholes. i dont think it’s too much to ask that after reading a post you might find particularly offensive, take a few seconds to think before you type, consider that the content was not written to uniquely appeal to your disdain, and keep the comments constructive and respectful.

    keep up the good work, AS. appreciate that you do this all because you love it. and plus, where else on the web could i find such frank discussions of strap ons??

  7. So I can’t help but read the “Your mom.” at the end of Romi’s mom’s comment as a “your mom” joke instead of a signature, and it’s so fucking funny. I feel like I’m kind of insane right now.

  10. I get excited near the end of every week, because Comment Awards are on Fridays. This is how much I love them. They are a necessary part of the beginning of my weekend.

  11. “This Week’s Comment Awards Comes With A Special Message”

    I initially misread “message” as “massage.”

  12. omg brb drinking myself into major depressive episode

    THESE TEARS ARE SALTY, AUTOSTRADDLE. SALTY.

  14. @ The Land Before Time Award: This made me burst out laughing in my women’s cinema class.

    … reading autostraddle during a women’s cinema class-> I am officially the queen of stereotypical lesbos… did I mention that I have a huge crush on the cute andro prof? .. but I think I missed my chance. She looked really unamused since I giggled while she was discussing the oppression of women in Iran. Fail.

    • yeah. that’s not gonna go well for you.

      (feelin ur pain bc been there: Art History 210 / Margaret Cho on youtube in the back row )

Comments are closed.