The feature image of Mona Wales and all of the photographs in this NSFW Sunday are from fetish site Mondo Fetiche. The inclusion of a visual here is not an assertion of a model’s gender or orientation. If you’re a photographer or model and think your work would be a good fit for NSFW Sunday, please email carolyn at autostraddle dot com.
Welcome to NSFW Sunday!
“Despite the very sensuous mental images you might have of glistening bodies getting it on under the sun in a pool, Jacuzzi, or off the coasts of oddly clear ocean waters, underwater sex is all about constant maneuvering, balance, and determination. (And not getting a UTI from a whirlpool jet.),” writes Suzannah Weiss at Vice. Here’s how to have great sex under water, whether in a private pool, remote natural body or water, or your shower:
“If penetration seems too wobbly or otherwise tricky, Stewart suggested keeping it simple by stimulating each other with your hands or toys instead of trying to maneuver intercourse or oral sex. ‘You should do sex acts in water that are easy to concentrate on,’ she said. ‘When we multitask, we can only do one thing well, so, when you’re holding your breath and performing oral sex, one thing is going to suffer.’ Water-friendly sex acts that might be easier than penetrative sex include external fingering or handjobs, mutual masturbation, and oral sex with the receiver sitting at the edge of the water or floating in the water. Sex also doesn’t necessarily need to include orgasm or ejaculation—and maybe it shouldn’t in Jacuzzis or pools, as it can be difficult to clean sexual fluids out of the water.”
Here’s what’s up with animalistic kink (i.e., where you, as consenting humans, play like feral animals).
Here’s how to use a butt plug.
You will not get herpes from a toilet seat.
Here’s what “BDSM” stands for.
You deserve more than breadcrumbs in your relationship(s).
Here’s a history of the ribbed condom.
Here’s how to take care of leather.
Here’s how to respond to stress.
What should you do after having a sex dream?:
“‘Sometimes we start fantasizing about the person we had a dream about because of how real it seems,’ said Melissa De Los Santos, a 33-year-old dream interpreter who goes by Meli, The Dreaming Yogi. ‘The mind doesn’t know the difference between what is real and imagined, but if you focus on what it’s trying to tell you about yourself, put the other person aside, and journal on the symbolism of your dreams instead of the dream itself, you can recognize what part of you has been suppressed and wants to come out.'”
Ask your partner(s) these ten questions before getting married. Topics include money, dividing domestic labor, how you handle conflict and more:
“Hopefully you’ve already had a few humdingers to get a sense of how you, as a couple, create and resolve conflict. All healthy couples have arguments; the key is whether you can resolve them without lingering resentment. Does your partner need time and space after an argument? How much? Is name-calling and throwing things things ever okay in a fight? Do they believe in the trope: ‘never go to bed angry’ (nearly impossible, FYI) or do they have a habit of shutting down and stonewalling? Figure out how to work through these patterns before getting hitched.”
Meh. I’d take that talking to strangers thing with a big grain of cis white male salt TBH. That same author also wrote an article about “reaching across the political aisle” and “learning about the other point of view” lol.
I work medical transport; even in somewhat progressive Portland, I drive a lot of old white republicans around and one of the first things I learned on that job is how to keep a conversation confined to talking about nothing. When I fail, my sanity usually suffers. 🙁