The nice thing about having an internal database of LGBTQ+ women and non-binary television characters is that you can get really, truly obsessive about various patterns in the data. Like, for example, what queer characters are often named. Unfortunately, there’s no database tracking the popularity of all TV character names for me to compare our numbers to, although there is an analysis of movie character names, which determined the most popular names for female movie characters were Sarah, Mary, Lucy, Claire, Alice, Maggie, Rachel, Lisa, Kate and Anna.
There’s lists of the most popular baby names bequeathed within the last three decades in the U.S., upon which we find Jessica, Ashley, Emily, Sarah, Samantha, Amanda, Brittany, Elizabeth, Taylor, Megan, Madison, Emma, Olivia, Hannah, Abigail, Isabella, Ava, Mia, Charlotte and Sophia.
We’ve got the most popular names of the last one hundred years: Mary, Patricia, Jennifer, Elizabeth, Linda, Barbara, Susan, Jessica, Margaret, Sarah.
So when you look at our database, you’d anticipate a selection of those same names showing up in abundance but my friends… you will not. Our characters — particularly those that are written as queer from the jump or guest characters who exist solely to be The Lesbian, rather than characters who become gay eventually but weren’t initially intended that way, often are the most deliberately named of all. Let’s get into it.
1. Call Her Franky / Frankie
Start here: Franky. Frankie. Sounds good, right? Butch but playful, like a grown-up tomboy. Like how lesbians are allowed to wear sneakers wherever they want no matter how old they are; even to host daytime talk shows or give poetry readings. That’s a classic Frankie move. Is Frankie a nickname for Francesca? Frances? Has there even been a straight Frankie/Franky on television? (Frankie in Grace & Frankie doesn’t count.) Frankies have hobbies. They are a little rebellious.
Franky/Frankie is tied as the third most popular name for TV characters in our database, but Frankie comes in at #132 on the list of most popular names for girls in the U.K and “Franky” doesn’t rank at all. If it’s short for Francesca, that’s #89. In the U.S., Frankie ranks much lower, in the 700s, but most of our Frankies on TV are from the Commonwealth: Franky Fitzgerald in Skins (UK), Franky Doyle in Wentworth (Australia) and the show Wentworth was based on, Cell Block H (Australia). Frankie Alan, aka Shane UK, from Lip Service (UK), Frankie Hollingsworth from Canada’s Degrassi, Frankie Coyne from Canadas’s Workin’ Moms. We’ve got a Frankie on UK soap Emmerdale. Just two Frankies are American — Frankie Anderson, from Rookie Blue and Frankie Stone from All My Children.
Frank, by the way, is #5 on the list of most popular names for a male movie character.
2. Give a Butch a Nickname
If you find yourself face-to-face with the subversive teen-idol potential of a grown-up masculine-of-center woman, consider a nickname. Eva “Papi” Torres. Carrie “Big Boo” Black. Felicia “Snoop” Pearson. (The Wire character shared her name with the actress who played her.) Elizabeth “Mac” MacMillan. Christina “Chris” Alonso. LaVerne “Jukebox” Thomas. Tiana “Coop” Cooper. Caroline “Caz” Hammond. Dominga “Daddy” Duerte. Emily “A&W” Blake. Henrietta “Hen” Wilson. Zara “Drago” Dragovich. Vivienne “Scotty” Scott. Raquel “Rocky” Perez.
Maybe we don’t even need to know the full name. Maybe even their friends don’t know until the credit cards come back from splitting the bill and somebody’s like, “wait, who’s Veronica?” Instead we just have what we have: Harry, Kase, Rocky, Finn, Brit, Denny, Eddy, Kat, Shaz.
3. They Shoot Horses Don’t They
Deciding between whether or not you want your character to be a domesticated animal (e.g., horse, dog) or a human lesbian? Pick a horse name, just in case: Dusty, Bullet, Pony, Yorkie, Clementine, Crutch, Texas, Sugar, Juicy, Pippy, Poppy, Roxy, Ruby. Fleabag? Name your horse/lesbian Fleabag.
4. Try Alex
Alex Vause and Piper Chapman’s Shipper name turned out to be Vauseman, which was a relief, because we already had a Palex (Paige and Alex, Degrassi). We could’ve had two Malexes, too, if we’d wanted them (we didn’t): Maggie Sawyer and Alex Danvers or Marissa Cooper and Alex Kelly. There’s just a lot of Alexes, is what I’m telling you. So many Alexes that we are often at risk of repeating a shipper name!
You can catch eleven queer Alexes (and just two Alexandras) on your television box but the most Alex-overpopulated segment of the media landscape is absolutely The Lesbian Webseries. It’s a law, I think: all lesbian webseries must contain Alexes. The LezWatchTV database has at least 12 webseries with characters named Alex. The most popular “Alex” has ever been as a baby girls name in the U.S. is 539th. That was in 1995, the same year Alexandra peaked at #26. Amongst queer female TV characters, however, it rolls in at number five. And it’s #12 on the list of most popular male movie character names.
5. …or any Girl/Boy name
I’m talking about your Sams, I’m talking about your Charlies. Your Bills and your Billies. Bring me your Devons! Your Shanes and your Shays! Your Chrisses and Bos, your Chases and CJs and Robins and Jordans, your Jos and your Joeys. Your Reagans. Lord BRING ME YOUR REAGANS.
6. Susan
In the beginning, Marta Kauffman and Kevin S. Bright created Carol and Susan. And they were without form, and void: and darkness was upon the face of the deep. And the Spirit of G-d moved upon the face of the waters. And G-d said, Let there be more Susans; and there were more Susans.
There was Susan, a human-turned-vampire-turned-human who was (as so often is the case with these characters) strangled to death. Onto us came Pilar’s butch wife Susan, with the gold chain and the bowl cut. Then we beget Bizzy’s secret girlfriend Susan, who died of cancer. After forty days and forty nights there was Susan, who told someone at the Minbari Rebirth Ceremony that she loved Talia. In exile we found Susan, George’s bisexual wife who died from licking a poisonous envelope label. In the promised land we came upon Suzanne, the earthquake specialist who had one entire date and one entire kiss with Rhonda Roth before her show got entirely cancelled. From the shadows and into the light came Suzanne who got sent to Litchfield but shouldn’t have. Susie the booking agent who is gay but they haven’t made her gay yet.
Susan may not be as popular as it once was —its average ranking over the last 200 years is #361 — but it does come in at #7 on the list of the most popular names of the last 100 years. On our list, it’s 4th.
7. Nicole / Nikki / Nico
Nicole and variations therein is the #2 most represented name family in our database with 19 occurrences. It’s a popular name in general — coming in at #42 on the 50 most popular names of the last 100 years — but its over-prevalence in our database is impossible to ignore. How do we explain all the Nikkis and Nickys and Nicoles amongst us? Nicky Nichols, Nicole Haught, Nikki Stevens, Nikki Wade, Nikki Boston? Nico from Vida and Nico from Marvel’s Runaways and Nico from Charmed and so many others where those came from? I have a theory: Nick is a boy’s name, coming in at #13 on the list of most popular male movie characters, and these names remind people of that name!
8. Bury Your Nadias
In addition to the established high death rate for Susans (38%), Nadias have a very slim chance of survival. Of five queer Nadias to appear on television, four are dead. (The fifth made out with Bette Porter in her car) Of six queer Taras, three are dead and you probably remember them all.
9. The Same Names as Everyone Else….
We’ve got your Kates and Sophies and Alices and Sarahs and Emilys and Lucys and Annes and Laurens and Jessicas and Rachels and Eves. A lot of Emilys, really. So many Emilys!
10. …More or Less
We are, however, suspiciously low on Marys. (Perhaps it’s just too holy, too Virgin Mary-ish, for someone to see a lesbian and think “MARY!”) We have more Beths than Elizabeths. More Juleses than Julias. Some minor abundances: Debs, Deborahs and Debbies. Quite a few more-than-expected Ginas, Naomis and, most oddly, Ruby. Did I mention Franky? At the end of the day, you cannot go wrong naming your character “Franky.”
So when do we get the crossover eps/fanfics with all the Franky/Frankies, Kat/Cats etc?
Also Frankie from Working Moms
That’s surprising about Frank/Frankie. I didn’t really realize how popular of a name it is.
Well, isn’t this list just dandy?
If I ever want to name a kid, I’ll just call them Alex!
Ahm speaking of, I’d also like to throw Lexa’s name into that hat.
I’d like to propose another category, “Their Parents Were Probably Hippies”, under which could fall the likes of Nomi, Amanita, Waverly, Willow, Santana and Cosima
Except that Nomi named herself, so she is the hippy
True true, but it’s more about the aesthetics than the facts
Cosima read ethnic family name rather than hippy name to me but uh that’s cause it turns out it literally is in my case.
My chances of survial on a t.v show are 50/50. Maybe I won’t apply to be on Bear Gryll’s The Island.
also watch out for vampires!!
You forgot a key early entry in the Book of Susans. The woman Ellen Morgan came out for (who turned out to be already partnered).
“Susan…”
*leans on airport microphone button*
“… I’m gay.”
you are
SO RIGHT
wow susan is patient zero
Also the ex-wife of horrible Ross on the show Friends is married to a lesbian Susan. One of the few openly gay characters at the time.
Now that I’ve seen their names on the same list, I’d like a prison situation with Nikki Wade and Franky Doyle please.
TEXAS
NO
riese did you write this article specifically for me? the name nerd queer who subscribes to parenting websites to hear about the latest trends?
takeaways: nicknames as names are a v popular UK thing that the US is finally catching up to. as always the queers get it first.
masculine/neutral coded names are obviously only for lesbians.
did you know there’s a list of most popular pet names? https://www.travelandleisure.com/animals/most-popular-dog-names-2019 there is! just perusing, we have maggie (sawyer), luna (lovegood), cooper (coop), piper (chapman), and toby (which just feels gay) in the top fifty!
coming soon to a silver screen near you, Moose, the butch bartender with sleeve tats, a scowl, and a heart of gold!
Moose ! I need this.
caitlin i did and you are WELCOME.
i am very sad that my dog carol has not jump-started a trend of people naming their dogs carol, but COOPER!!
i think that the girl who hooked up with devon (uhuh) in “i love dick” was named toby, so it’s gay!!!
Bless you for that Babylon 5 reference. Lt Commander Susan Ivanova is my everything.
Susan is how I got through the first 4 or 5 episodes while the show found its feet. So, so, everything is our Susan.
(being now about halfway through season 4, I will defend these morons to the DEATH)
I loved Susan Ivanova and miss her terribly.
Bab 5 forever !
Same!
this is everything
I was not aware that there was a whole entire character named Alex Kelly in something, and I don’t know how you mentioned her in the same sentence as Alex Danvers without saying anything about Kelly Olsen.
4/5 chance of dying, 1/5 chance of making out with Bette in her car… odds I would accept
This is so timely. In a murder mystery party my girlfriend hosted recently my characters name was “Frankie.” Coincidence, I think not.
anna you knew what you were doing and you did it, i salute you!
Honestly I just stopped reading when I got to the One True Susan, because I had to go lie down and have a quiet Minbari sob. Too pure and good for this fallen space station world.
Omg is that why people sometimes think I’m straight?!
Quick! Get a nickname!!!!!
Though if we can have a Lesbian Jesus surely we can also have a Mommi Mary?
Mommi Mary May I
have you considered going by “dusty”???
Being aware of how much a “gay name” Alex is in media and RL is reason #2 I chose Lex as a screen name back when I joined and before we had the hard data.
I’m such a name geek and this is my catnip. Love it.
If memory serves, Nadia Miertschin (or however you spell it) was the first Nadia in TLW universe who was the vapid, lesbifriend of Gabby Deveaux and who allegedly hit on Tina in a drunken haze. 2/3 odds of death?
MeLL your memory is serving up the truth!!!!!!
i believe… nadia was the one who showed up at a leather party with gabby on a leash??
My D&D character’s name is Reagan and she’s def queer. Wonder if I picked something up from the cultural zeitgeist.
(Her name is actually spelled Raeg’n because everyone else’s names were more… fantastical but I liked mine and wasn’t ready to change it. (Also my my name is Kate so maybe there’s no escaping queer names for me. Can’t complain, my fav superhero is my namesake, Kate Kane.))
Reagan is also the name of the most kickass and pan character in The Once and Future Nerd. Well chosen!
Reagan is also a human who dates Batwoman in the reboot AND was the first lesbian that Amy dated in “Faking It.” IT’S AS GAY AS YOUR D+D GAME IS LONG
Anybody else amused (or know why I am atleast) that Reagan has become a queer-coded character name?
is it bc of our homophobic ex-president
I stumbled across this pretty randomly, but I’m glad I did. I just wanted to compliment your writing style–I enjoyed it thoroughly–and I imagine I’ll be looking for more of your stuff to read.