You may have noticed a little pattern in my first few posts of 2019 and that pattern is hope. 2018 was so dang brutal for so many queer people, and so in the early days of this year I’ve found myself really drawn to books and TV and movies and podcasts that are full of light and warmth and hard-won happiness. Enter: “Days of Our Wives,” a new YouTube series by Toronto-based queer couple Angelina and Niko (and sometimes their cats, Dawn and May!). It’s part advice, part reviews of movies and TV shows and video games, part goofy married antics, part personal narrative about careers and family and mental health, and just a whole lot of love.
About three years ago I stumbled upon an ASMR video on YouTube that changed my life forever. ASMR, which stands for Autonomous Sensory Meridian Response, describes a variety of soothing sensations that come from listening to someone with a gentle voice talk; or someone flipping pages in a book or magazine; or someone making quiet, methodical noises. Like Bob Ross, who made ASMR videos on accident! On YouTube, however, there’s an entire community of creators who make ASMR videos on purpose. I watch an ASMR video every night as part of my bedtime routine, and they always make me feel calmer and more relaxed.
Angelina, who goes by albinwhisperland (or albinwonderland, her non-ASMR channel), was one of the first ASMR creators I was drawn to because her videos are all about my favorite things: pets and gaming and comics and sci-fi and fantasy and being a woman with a wife. I was delighted when she just announced one day that she had a girlfriend she’d married, and giddy when they started their own series together.
One of the things we talk about all the time is how important it is for queer folks to be able to tell their own stories, to be in charge of their own representation. It’s no surprise that the television that’s resonated with us most deeply these past few years — Steven Universe and She-Ra and One Day at a Time and Fresh Off the Boat and Pose and Vida and Brooklyn Nine-Nine — was conceived and written and acted and directed by people who get it because they live it. Self-produced YouTube videos aren’t really considered TV yet, but their reach is almost as wide. YouTube pulls in over 1.8 billion viewers a month (placing them right behind Facebook, which boasts 2 billion users a month) and most of those people are there to watch user-created content.
When I came out, the only queer things to watch were The L Word, South of Nowhere, and vlogs created by queer writers. It’s fascinating to me that all these years later, when there are over 100 scripted TV shows about lesbian, bisexual, and queer women — and that it’s my actual job to write about them — there’s still something uniquely magical about simply engaging with queer people living their queer lives out loud, loving the same things I do, the same way I do.
Plenty of regular “Days of Our Wives” viewers have pointed out that Angelina and Niko look like IRL grown-up Princess Bubblegum and Marceline. That’s true, too, but it’s just a bonus.
You can follow Angelina and Niko on Twitter (@albinwonderland + @ifgirlscollide), Instagram (@albinwonderland + @ifgirlscollide), and YouTube, and check out Angelina’s other channels at albinwonderland and albinwhisperland.
Well this is an utterly joyful way to start the day.
Yay! ALB is one of my favorite ASMR artists! So excited to see new content from her and her wife. 💕💕💕
Ahhh!!! I love these two so much! Fashion icons and sweetie pies!! So nice to see smaller queer creators getting some love!
Her hair is just the most perfect shade of pink! And Niko’s boots in that wedding shot are everything. I think I have to check them out for the style ideas alone.
I followed Angelina on livejournal many many years ago when I was a confused and deeply closeted queer gal in middle school and I always found myself so drawn to her. I recently discovered her instagram and I was so excited to find out she’s queer as well!
This is so pure 😍
They seem wonderful! Thanks for introducing them to me, Heather!!
It really means a lot to me- even as an adult- to see queer women living a life together and doing well. I didn’t really have an idea of if that was possible and how that could work out, when I was a baby gay.
By the way, here are some other queer women couples that I like to watch on youtube! Jessica Kellgren-Fozard (Jessica out of the Closet) and her wife Claudia- Jessica is hard of hearing and has some chronic illnesses, they’re both gay, and Jessica is also really into vintage clothes, so lots of cool content from them. Alexis and Lilian are a gay couple that started out long distance (Alexis is Canadian and Lilian is German) and they’re finally able to live in the same country together! Rose and Rosie are quite silly, but they’re a fun British gay couple (Rose is lesbian, Rosie is bisexual) to watch as well.
I love Jessica and Claudia! Their videos are some of my favorites on YouTube.
Jessica Out of the Closet is wonderful!
She’s sweet and funny, and has so many great videos about living with chronic health issues (valuable watching for ppl with the same and also ppl who want to support them). She and Claudia are lovely together.
I’m screaming! I used to live for albinwonderland’s videos back in the day, but kind of fell out of YouTube as real life took over. It’s delightful to see that she and Niko have their own series, now!
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