Autostraddle Anonymous Sex Toy Review:

Over the last few years, sex toy companies and stores have asked us to review their toys in exchange for, you know, their toys. This week, one of our anonymous reviewers tried out Fun Factory’s Bück Dich paddle, sent to us by Good Vibrations.

• Size: 12.4 inches long, 1.73 inch diameter handle/dildo, 5.1 inch diameter paddle
• Materials: silicone
• Color: black or red
• Price: $80

I took the Bück Dich paddle to a kink play event and it was the most popular kid at the dance.

It got passed around the leather bar and smacked against many palms to oohs and aahs. Three kinky friends donated their butts to science for me to paddle, and three experienced Tops hit me with it. My regular play partner and I also used it in private for serious, more naked research. Unanimously, everyone loved the Bück Dich. Here’s why.

A hefty paddle with an aggressively ridged dildo for a handle, it is not polite looking, and I mean that as a compliment. Everyone who checked it out at the event said, “Oh,” in a grave, shit’s-about-to-go-down way. (“Bück Dich” means “bend over” in German.) This is also because it’s silicone, which has a well-deserved reputation for stinging wickedly on impact. I got nervous seeing my very toppy play partner’s smirk as she held it; likewise, holding it in front of whomever I was about to hit was super fun because they’d wiggle, squeeze their eyes shut and breathe “okay” like they were psyching themselves up to jump off a high dive. If trepidation is part of your foreplay, this is great tool.

That said, it’s only punishing if you want it to be. What sets the Bück Dich apart from other silicone paddles (especially the Tantus Plunge, the most similar toy out there) is its firmness, due to its non-toxic “plastimorph” core. It has some wiggle but not that notorious floppy-slap, so the person being hit feels some pleasing deep-tissue thud along with a slightly lessened silicone sting. Everyone I paddled smiled and said “I like it” a few whacks in, reporting that combo-type sensation. When we used it, my play partner hit me hard, alternating between her open palm and the paddle, and I found her hand more stingy on my bare skin. I liked the unique sensation of the impact on my own body during light play, but I dig intensity and pain and this paddle definitely delivered when she used its considerable weight on me.

The two sides of the paddle have different surfaces, one smooth and one lightly textured. Personally, I couldn’t note a difference in sensation when I was being hit with it even on bare skin, but I might just be an unobservant little snowflake. My volunteer bottoms all reported that they could feel the rough side “more” but also that the smooth side was “more stingy.”

Even with its mid-range-paddle size, it’s not cumbersome, and easy to aim, swing and control when you need to dial up or down how hard you’re hitting. I’d put myself at beginner-to-intermediate topping experience, and it wasn’t complicated or intimidating for me to use. The material is comfortable to hold, even for longer periods, and the shape means you can keep adjusting your grip. The ridges act like finger holds and when I wanted more control I’d creep my finger up over the flared handle top; being able to paw at the shape of the handle in multiple ways meant I could adjust to hit my partner from different angles without having to crank my elbow into weird positions. The Tops all agreed that it feels “balanced in the hand,” and my play partner gave it points because it “didn’t threaten to jump out of [her] hand like similar paddle combos.” My pro-Domme friend commented that she could hold it with her fierce femme manicure without stabbing herself in the palm with her nails, “like with some paddles.”

Now for the real scoop on the handle. It’s modeled after Fun Factory’s Stronic Drei vibrator, borrowing that toy’s deeply-ridged shaft and steep G-spot and prostate-stimulating curve. It’s safe to use with water-based lube and you can clean the medical-grade, non-porous silicone with soap and water or a toy cleaner. You’re meant to fuck with it. A friend of mine held the Bück dildo-side-up and declared, “Nope.” It’s not a toy that glides in and out of you leisurely; while not difficult to insert, you feel it in you. The material is plenty pliable but the intense shape pushes and tugs on your insides with thrusting, and if your play partner really wants to test your devotion they can do things like twist it a little so you really feel the curve, or insert it all the damn way up to where the flare starts getting wide. I like my fucking deliciously stressful, especially after a good spanking, and in the hands of a capable partner the business end of the Bück can provide. I tried it on myself twice with (much) less vigor and even then, it felt more extreme than other insertable toys I’ve tried. But so did my orgasms. (Again, that flare at the handle’s top makes it easy to hold and maneuver, even lubed up and with your own fine self.)

The triumph of the Bück Dich is that it is killer versatile, and not just because it’s a dual-use toy. If you’re a beginner to kink, it could be a good starter paddle because of the comfort, control, and un-fussy cleaning capability it offers. For experienced kinksters, it can play hard in as many different ways as you can dream up. Bend over. Have fun.

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