Feature photo by Zanele Muholi via Seattle Globalist. All of the photographs on NSFW Sundays are taken from various tumblrs and do not belong to us. All are linked and credited to the best of our abilities in hopes of attracting more traffic to the tumblrs and photographers who have blessed us with this imagery. The inclusion of a photograph here should not be interpreted as an assertion of the model’s gender identity or sexual orientation. If there is a photo included here that belongs to you and you want it removed, please email bren [at] autostraddle dot com and it will be removed promptly, no questions asked.
Welcome to NSFW Sunday!
@ Bootyconnaisseur via rodeoh
“‘Sexual scripts are basic blueprints, yes, but clearly they can be adapted and revised for the user,’ Plante writes. ‘Sexual spanking should be viewed as one of the many sexual adaptations individuals make, based on interactions and changes to intrapsychic and interpersonal scripts.’
Plante goes further to explain that there isn’t just one spanking-related sexual script, though, referencing the spanking spectrum, and the difference between those who like to strike and those who like to receive. A person who has a script that says “I give the pleasure” or is dominant would likely get pleasure from spanking someone who gets pleasure from receiving it—most likely a submissive. A preference to spank, to be spanked, or to not partake in the practice at all represents a person’s orientation to their sexuality, gender, and personality. While spanking includes a host of different sexual reactions to different types of striking, it’s still an umbrella term—not all spanking gives people the same type of pleasure, if any at all.”
+ It can be hard to come out as non-monogamous:
“It’s these very stereotypes that make it difficult for non-monogamous people—particularly ones whose extracurricular relationships rarely make it past the casual stage—to fathom being public about their relationship status. Yet it’s also these stereotypes that makes coming out as non-monogamous—and, in the process, normalizing the idea of relationship structures other than two people exclusively bonded for life—feel so important to many who’ve chosen to reject monogamy.”
Lonely Lingerie fall/winter 2016 via the lingerie addict
+ This 3D model of the clitoris could be the start of a sexual revolution (at least, in France).
+ At Oh Joy Sex Toy, Capp discusses vestibulodynia, a surprisingly common medical condition that causes pain in the vaginal opening.
+ Indiegogo has added a sexual wellness category.
+ Being asexual has always been okay regardless of what science has to say about it, but science has now caught up with that.
via flavors
+ Proposition 60, which would make condom use mandatory for adult films in California, shift the cost of STI testing onto production companies, and allow anyone to sue companies for violation, is a bad idea.
+ Whatever you think about Victorian attitudes toward sex, you’re probably wrong.
+ Being a badass and a bottom is not contradictory:
“Based on kinky stereotypes, it seems like being a bad-ass and being a bottom are contradictory. But they’re not — just like being a sweetheart and being a top are not contradictory. Having a core of concern and emotional care for someone else makes that person even better qualified to be a top, just like having a strong sense of self, direction, and desire makes someone an even better bottom.
Submissives are often seen as weak, passive little creatures who don’t have a brain of their own, and whose head gets filled with their dominant’s every whim. Or, perhaps worse, as doormats who are being taken advantage of, controlled, and manipulated.
While this might be true for some folks — toxic relationship behavior and abuse can and does happen in D/s relationships, just like any other — most submissives I know are actually bad-asses.”
“Alien babes pt II.”
Left @darlingniki-b, right @kenziethehappyfairy.
Photography by @makingsciencesexy.
+ Sex education is basically the worst, almost universally:
“[R]esearchers were able to identify the two biggest issues with sex education. The first: schools don’t acknowledge that sex is a special subject that, unlike a standard English or math class, requires a bit more finesse to teach effectively. […]
The second major problem was that schools seemed to deny that their students were sexually active, which made the information out of touch with reality, irrelevant and overly skewed toward heterosexual intercourse, the researchers say. There was little practical information […] Teachers also presented the information as overly scientific, with hardly a nod to pleasure and desire; female pleasure, specifically, was rarely mentioned.”
A couple of your links are not working: Capp ref and Sex education
Oh, Carolyn, thank you, thank you, thank you for presenting the article showing the 3 D model of the whole clitoris to all of us! The author’s statement of how to explain about sex parts :
“And lastly, imagine being able to respond to inquisitive children who want to know why Jane’s and John’s genitals are different, with a logical and factual answer – that a clitoris is like an internal penis and a penis like an external clitoris.”
Is wonderful for kids.
But it is also wonderful for transfemales, especially we who are lesbians, and still have a penis, when we explain that being a transfemale also makes all of our parts female ….act and feel female! Like the author states…..the penis is an external clitoris, except as a translesbian it is not just a metaphor, it is emotionally true for us. And it is an emotional truth that makes us feel happy about ourself. ❤️
I didn’t choose to “reject monogamy” anymore than I chose to “reject heterosexuality”. :P
I am poly but I don’t think of it as an orientation.
But I don’t want to project that line of reasoning onto others. Can you explain more about what being poly (or non-monogamous, or whatever term you identify with) means to you?
I am curious because I have heard a lot of people indicate that they think of their polyamory like a sexual orientation, and I’ve also heard the opposite.
I genuinely want to learn more.
Not the OP, but I am poly (well non-hierarchical ethically non-monogamous) and I don’t feel like I rejected monogamy either – there was never a point where I decided not to be monogamous. I’m not sure I ever really considered it as an option or thought about it until I was quite old (22? 23?) and came across the term polyamory, and thought, awesome, that’s me!
It’s not a “lifestyle” to me anymore than my orientation is, Heather. When I fell in love with someone else, it just was. There was no decision to do so. There was simple acknowledgement that, “I love more than one person deeply. Apparently I’m not monogamous.”
It’s not something I chose and it’s not something I could “un-choose”. It’s a part of me. Besides which, biologically speaking we have KNOWN for YEARS that some people are hard-wired to be monogamous and some people aren’t.
This isn’t some switch I can flip off. Trying to terminate my affections or relationships with one of my partners would be like trying to pretend I’m not queer. It would be like trying to pretend I don’t love my wife because we’re both women.
It’s an inherent part of my identity and I firmly believe it’s a biological inclination. I’m not saying that it must be that for all people. Even IF sexual orientation were a choice, there’s no reason we should condemn people for their choice. The same is true of polyamory. However, for many of us it’s as natural as our orientation or gender-identity. We know who we are and how we feel and the only conscious choice we’ve made is to be true to ourselves.
Beyonce and Michelle Williams pressing their warm skin against each other.
Can I handle it?
I don’t think I can handle it.
Damn it. I meant Kelly Rowland.
Both true
AHH THANK YOU FOR THE BADASS/BOTTOM PARADOX ARTICLE! Literally just 12 hours before you posted this I was complaining to my friends that the girls I hook up with ALWAYS think I’m a top when I’m *so*not* so that link is the most perfect timing
Am I the only one who noticed that the ace flag is upside down in that article on asexuality???